Much respect to the mothers. Without my emergence from my mother’s vagina, I wouldn’t be able to bestow on you my fantasy baseball ‘pertness. We are one people and everyone has popped out of a mother’s vagina at one point, unless you’re an alien — I’m looking at you, Andrelton! — and with our emergence from our mother’s vagina — or that Cesarean stuff that I don’t fully understand — I say we should all live together, loving each other, and never speaking of Ike Davis again, cause he sucks. With all that mother loving out of the way, yesterday was about the worst offensive day I’ve seen during a full schedule day for rosterable fantasy hitters. I mean, there were a ton of Brayan Pena’s and Donald Lutz’s doing work, but not a whole lot from guys actually owned. Though, it would be awesome if someone got caught corking their pink bat. Corking a pink bat is like A-Rod growing a mustache. Then the nadir of that offensive dearth (pinnacle of pitching success?) was Chris Sale. He tossed a shutout, one-hitter with 7 Ks vs. the Anathema Angels. Still don’t trust him to stay healthy all season, but it looks pretty likely that he’s going to be pitching well until his arm falls off. Then, if his arm doesn’t fall off perchance, he’s going to be a number one pitcher. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Adeiny Hechavarria had a heckavagamia against the Phillies on Sunday with a 3-run triple and a grand slam – both against Halladay. These types of games will be few and far between with this guy’s bat – he’s a glove first SS (though that’s what they said about Brandon Crawford and he’s flashing early power) – but tell that to the old Jews in Miami that think of God when they hear his name. I just wish Adeiny didn’t take off for the Sabbath as I had him Friday night in the DraftKings “Can you take down Rudy Gamble?” challenge. I had my worst finish – 15th out of 23 – so I guess the answer to the challenge was “Yes.” We are doing it every Friday so pay attention to Twitter and the comment boards on Friday for the contest link. Anyway, here are some other observations from this weekend’s games:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Here’s Chris Davis‘s ceiling. And here’s where he’s playing right now: take your jigsaw, saw out a hole in your ceiling, put a ladder through the hole, climb to the roof, grab onto the tree branch to your right, monkey-climb up to the top and wait twenty seconds. Okay, now grab onto that passing stork and sit in his mouth for five minutes. Go ahead, you can check your phone while you’re in there, it won’t bother Storkie. Now if Storkie has closed his mouth, open it. Otherwise, just look up… See that basket with Bill James waving down? In that basket, just offscreen is Chris Davis. That’s how far he’s playing above his head. Right now, everything he’s hitting is falling in or going out of the park. A .330-average, 50+ homers is obviously not a sustainable pace, but to give you an idea of how bad it could get — he hit around .216 in 167 ABs in June and July of last year. If his strikeout rate goes up to his norm, that’s not far from where it could sit for a few months. Don’t sell him for a pot of pasta sauce from your neighbor, Buddy Biancalana, but I’d explore offers. For our four lady readers, Chris(ten) Davis is a Sell in the City. To reach a better advertising demo, UC Davis, U sell Davis.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Roy Halladay makes every hitter look like Babe Ruth right after he burped. (Burping was the key to his success; I watched a documentary.) Roy’s gotta hit the Disgraceful List, doesn’t he? I mean, it’s in everyone’s best interest at this point. Watching him is like seeing Carol Channing before someone told her to use a mirror to apply makeup. “How’d I get this lipstick on my ears? Maybe a dab of mascara on the ol’ chin!” You should’ve heard me saying that line like Carol Channing in my head. It’s just real sloppy out there right now for Roy. If he’s not hurt, his fantasy owners may find him in a dark alley and change that. If he is hurt, stop taking one for the team, you gamer you. “I’m a gamer. I grind like I’m old school, Jodeci, going riding roughshod over fantasy ratios…Horatio…Alger, in reverse.” That’s Roy doing beat poetry. At this point, I’d bench him against most teams until he starts piecing together something less craptastic. You might, unfortunately, have the reincarnation of 2012 Lincecum. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
So I understand Eduardo Nunez is not American born – from the Dominican Republic – but Michelle was a mixed up translation, right? Like the person working on his passport just got lazy and it’s actually ‘Miguel’ or ‘Mario’, right? I’m trying to find the right answer for a man having Michelle anywhere in his name, I’ll take any excuse within reason. Did his Mom really just want a daughter? I understand you will grow up and be a strong man one day, Eduardo, but I want you to remember how pretty you were for your quinceanera. Dios mio, you were gorgeous in that red gown! That’s Eduardo’s mother reminding him why everyone picks on him in the Yankees clubhouse. Forget the nickname ‘Nuni’, I think we’re just gonna have to start calling him ‘Shelly’ or ‘Elle’ or ‘Elly’. But why do we need to know this man/woman’s name you ask? Well you’ll have to read to find out, silly! So let’s take a look why Shelly should be on your fantasy rosters for week 4 of the 2013 fantasy baseball season…Please, blog, may I have some more?
Welcome to the first official Deep Impact for this 2013 season. We went over some Overvalued and Undervalued choices to help with your off season tasks. Now that the year has begun, one could ask what our goal will be as this series moves forward. Well, foremost, this series exists to do the chit and do the chat with all things Deep League. That should have been obvious, or my title needs to be changed. But I don’t want to change it, I want to live in a world where Morgan Freeman is the President. And Leelee Sobieski is actually eating. And, well, Frodo is still Frodo, except instead of a ring, he’s keeping his chick safe from the tsunami horde and hopefully any type of sandwich shortage.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Like the 2nd basemen to target post, this is necessary. You want to take flyers on late shortstops. You want to avoid taking high-priced shortstops. Position scarcity is a buzzword(s) that fantasy baseballers (<–my mom’s term!) like to throw around. It’s the same as someone using ten-dollar words in conversation they don’t really understand. I’m drafting Tulo because of position scarcity! That’s you after reading an ESPN analcyst. We talk about position scarcity on our first fantasy baseball podcast of the year, too. At least I think we do under some of the jazzy music. Our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater shows Jimmy Rollins was the top shortstop last year at 36 overall. Maybe what everyone means by position scarcity is that there’s scarcely anything good at that position. It seems like everyone understands to punt catcher, but shortstops get people all greedy like Scrooge McDuck. Let’s assume Tulo doesn’t get hurt and gives you my projected stats: 83/25/98/.288/7. To draft him, you had to skip, say, Fielder (they are back-to-back in ESPN’s rankings), so you missed out on 94/39/117/.291/1. Then you grab, Ryan Howard later for 79/30/98/.245. So you got 162/55/196/.265/7. Now if you got Fielder and Jed Lowrie, you would’ve had 146/56/179/.275/3. That’s essentially the same thing, and you tell me who you feel more confident about Tulo or Fielder? Also, Lowrie can be had about 100 picks after Ryan Howard. Finally, if you were to go by ESPN’s projections, they have J.J. Hardy projected for 92/27/79/.267. That’s obviously bonkers, but how different is that than Tulo? Then there’s the fact that the majority of shortstops get value from the steal. SAGNOF! What’s the difference here between ESPN’s projections: 73/6/53/.278/21 or 77/9/47/.275/24? Barely much at all, right? One is Andrelton and one is Aybar, but they give them about an eighty draft pick difference. There were only three shortstops that earned more than $20 (barely) last year. Don’t get caught up in position scarcity. This is a (legal-in-all-countries-except-Lichtenstein) supplement to the top 20 shortstops for 2013 fantasy baseball. Click on the player’s name where applicable to read more and see their 2013 projections. Anyway, here’s some shortstops to target for 2013 fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
The Royals called up Jake Odorizzi, which means nothing really for this year. He will start next weekend vs. the Indians, and that could be a spot start in some fantasy leagues, but this is more for 2013. Or, since it’s the Royals, this is Moore for 2013.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Finally, an injury to an Angel that can clear up the awful logjam between OF/DH/3B. Oh wait, it’s to their catcher – Chris Iannetta – where their ‘depth’ involves Bobby Wilson, an injured Hank Conger and sub-Mathis scrubs. Maybe they should try Mark Trumbo at catcher. He’s gotta be better there than at 3B. Chris Iannetta anagrams to Neat Christian – how fitting for an Angel. I guess someone had to be the martyr to save Pujols’s soul from the fiery pits of replacement-level. For those of you in deep enough leagues to warrant a roster spot for Iannetta, just pick up whatever schmohawk catcher is on the waiver wire with the most ABs in the last 2 weeks. Nothing’s sweeter than a random HR from a FA scrub (shoutout to Cesar Izturis’s HR for our NL-only team). Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Stephen Strasburg – 6 IP, 1 ER, 8 baserunners, 13 Ks. “Wait until he hits twenty-seven years old and he can barely lift his arm to pack his bowl.” That’s Lincecum watching the Strasburg highlights.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Now this is a position I am bearish on to a point for 2012. On the one hand, there aren’t many SS I really want to draft. I like Troy Tulowitzki, Jose Reyes and Starlin Castro and that’s really it. The thing is, after those three, I don’t feel like I have a leg up on the competition for 2012 if I draft any of them. What’s the difference between Elvis Andrus and Dee Gordon when we look at expectations for this year? How about comparing Asdrubal Cabrera to Erik Aybar? My perfect team has either Castro or Tulo on it, with the high likelihood that its Starlin on my team. I’d balance him out by going for power from my next SS, take J.J. Hardy in the 11th or 12th. But really, your team is not going to be strong or weak based upon what your SS does this year. If I miss out on those top 3, I’d even talk myself into waiting for the Escobars, Yunel and Alcides, while bulking up elsewhere. ‘Waiting for the Escobars’…sounds like a movie title.Please, blog, may I have some more?