Fantasy Baseball Advice

Turns out Yahoo’s fantasy baseball doesn’t count the Twins and Tigers game no matter the format.  It’s the Keyser Söze of regular season games, I suppose.  ESPN, on the other hand, does count it.  So that means only one thing.  Pick up everyone from either the Tigers or the Twins, if it could mean a championship for you.  Ryan Raburn?  Yes, please!  Delmon Young?  Of course!  Fu-Te Ni?  Yes, unless you want to get F-U’d royally.

Starting the game are Scott Baker and Rick Porcello, but, at the first sign of trouble, they’ll be lifted.  This makes every starter, except for Sunday’s starters for either team, available.  Manship, Liriano and Robertson et al (that’s not the Israeli airline) could all see action.  Don’t forget possible unlikely heroes if you need any hitting stats.  That’s right, this may be the only time you see me fully endorse picking up Gerald Laird, Matt Tolbert and Jose Morales.  Even Nick Punto.  Well… No, even him.  Most importantly, if your opponent needs any stats at all, block them from getting them.  So if this means owning Matt Guerrier for no reason other than you’re afraid your opponent might get a vulture win and beat you, then own Guerrier, in the non-biblical sense, of course.

Chris Carpenter went five innings giving up no runs, allowing 4 baserunners, adding in 6 Ks, driving in 6 runs and five golden… rings.  12 runs for the Cards, but everyone was a ticker tease, except for Carpenter who pitchslapped Kip Wells.  LaRussa’s mind must be swimming with ideas….Do I hit him 8th?  7th?  Do I platoon him with Ankiel in the OF and have Ankiel come in for intentional walks?  Do I go with a Singapore Sling or an Old Fashioned?  Why is Dave Duncan looking at me?  Is my fly open?  How come no one read my book, Tonyball?  If I’m facing East, my hair should be facing West!  Why is it going South?!  If homeless people have no homes, why do they lug around so much junk?  Homeless people shouldn’t be pack rats!… Wow, there’s a lot swimming in Tony’s mind.  Interesting to peek into the mind of a genius, ain’t it?  Surprised he didn’t mention this is the last roundup of the year.  Ho-hum, so sad.  There will still be a new post every week day through the fall and winter, so check your separation anxiety at the door.  I’m still here.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Scott Baker – 5 IP, 0 ER.  His FIP last year was 3.79.  This year it was near 4.  So he was .20 off of last year.  He throws around 7 Ks per 9 innings.  So he’s good for about 155 Ks.  His Post-All-Star Break ERA was 3.39.  Guess what I’m saying is I’m going to predict next year he’ll pitch around a 3.75 ERA, good WHIP and solid Ks and he’ll be someone to look at as a third fantasy starter with number two upside and number four downside.  And in three months, I’ll quote that.

Orlando Cabrera – 2-for-5, 3 RBIs.  Behind the scenes of Razzball, I’m busy doing the top 20 recaps that will be coming your way over the next few weeks.  So O-Cab made it pretty high on the top 20 list for SSs.  I’m like, “Cool, he had a good 2nd half.”  He hit 4 homers and stole 6 bases while batting .296.  Okay, so he had a good two months?  Nope.  The shortstops are so shallow that a good five weeks is all it took.  Anyway, I’m jumping the gun, those recaps will be coming next week.

Delmon Young – 3-for-4 yesterday.  He’s batting .309 with one homer in September.  This is considered a good month for him.  Would I pickup Young off waivers next year?  Sure.  I wouldn’t draft him.  I’m not going to write someone off who’s only 24, but I’m at the point where I want to see something from Young before I take the gamble on him in 2010.  I mean, Ryan Raburn and Garrett Anderson are above Delmon Young on ESPN’s Player Rater.  Young’s the new blech.

Aaron Cook – 8 IP, 1 ER, 2 Ks.  It’s Rocktober.

Tim Lincecum – 7 IP, 2 ER.  I’m giving him the Cy Young.  He threw more innings than Carpenter, way more Ks and he’s dazzling.  I know, it’s tough to judge dazzling, but if you’ve ever watched Lincecum pitch you know what I mean.  It’s kinda like a choice between the crazy hot girl that would cheat on you and the sweet girl that would make a nice mother.  I’m taking the crazy hot girl.  For what it’s worth, I think the voters go with Carpenter.  What’s a shame in all of this is Wainwright’s getting totally ignored.  Maybe I just have a special kinship to Wainwright because I own him on a few teams and I pushed many people to draft him this year.

Mark Reynolds – 1-for-4, up to 215 Ks.  This last month (4 homers, 2 steals, .187) is why I’m going to probably take a pass on Reynolds if people are grabbing him in the top 50.  I saw value in him when people were drafting him around 200.  I see very little value for next year.  What do you want, I’m frugal.  It’s a recession after all.

Dan Haren – 6 IP, 5 ER, 7 Ks.  Ends the season with a 3.14 ERA and a 4.44 ERA in the 2nd half.  The good news is his next start is scheduled for the 1st half.

Derrek Lee – Scratched for personal reasons.  Maybe he has crabs.

John Lackey – 2 IP, 2 ER and 40 pitches.  This is about what you can expect from starters who are headed to the playoffs. I wouldn’t expect more than 5 innings from any of them.  This is a shout out to you Hamels owners.

Kevin Millwood – 9 IP, 2 ER, 10 Ks.  And this is what to expect from pitchers facing teams headed to the playoffs.

Chris Davis – 3-for-5, and hit his 21st homer of the year.  I can’t wait to see what Bill James predicts for Chris Davis for 2010.  No sarcasm there, really interested.

Cliff Lee – 5 2/3 IP, 3 ER, 6 Ks.  The Adverb finishes with a 3.39 ERA for Philly.

Kendry Morales – Hit his 34th homer yesterday.   The best case scenario would be the Angels are eliminated quickly from the playoffs.  Worst case scenario is, in late-October, Joe Buck saying something like, “America’s getting a firsthand look at what Kendry Morales has been doing all year.”  Then Tim McCarver says, “Good thing there weren’t more men on base when Mt. Everest erupted cause then there would be more runs.”

Eric Young, Jr. was in the September call up post, but it turns out he’s a preemie by a week.  Young has so many steals in the minors he’s worth a pickup in every league.  How many steals, you ask.  Well, I was getting there if you give me a second.  In the last four years of the minors, he has 87, 73, 46 and 58 steals, respectively.  Or disrespectfully, holy effin hey, are you kidding me?  In my never-ending rotation of schmohawks (thanks Beltran!), I dropped Alcides Escobar for Young in one league and chucked Drew Stubbs for him in another.  Will Young play every day?  Seems doubtful.  He has been playing in the outfield for at least a few days and will occasionally spell Barmes — B-A-R-M-E-S.  I think he’ll see four to five days a week, but for those needing steals, you know the drill.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Johan Santana – Done for the season.  This, and his lackluster (for him) season, might actually help Johan come at a discount in 2010 drafts.  I wouldn’t reach for him because I don’t believe in drafting pitchers early, but I could see him falling into the 5th or 6th rounds of early drafts.  The reason why I specify early is because once Johan looks good in spring training, he’ll bump up a round or two.  Then if Johan looks terrible in March, you’ll want to trade him for Nick Markakis.  Oh, and your fly’s open.  Don’t ask me how I know.

Billy Wagner – Headed to the Sox before The Curse of the Shirtless Bernazard got him.  He’ll back up Papelbon and, as a commenter pointed out yesterday, hopefully he turns out better than The Gagne Experiment™ in 2007.

Hank Blalock – Will be a bench player and will be asked to perform Cole Porter’s Anything Goes.  This is good news for Chris Davis.  Now for Davis to do something with this vote of confidence.

Freddy Sanchez – Headed to the DL.  Postdate this next comment 2011:  The Giants trade for Sanchez will cost them dearly.

Jake Peavy – Doode just can’t win.  On the next to last batter in his last minor league start, he was hit on the elbow by a comebacker.  Cue Kudrow, “I did not need to see that!”  Now because of elbow soreness, he might not be able to pitch this Saturday vs. the Yanks.

Joba Chamberlain – 4 IP, 7 ER.  He’s going again on regular rest this Sunday vs. the Orioles, so I can kinda understand holding him until then, but he’s really unstartable.  Then, on top of that, he’s been skipped here and there.  Okay, he’s not unstartable; he’s unownable.

Jorge Posada – Hit his 16th homer yesterday.  I’m calling a bogey on February Grey who said Posada was done.  He obviously was not done.  Being wrong at catcher is the position to be wrong at, but nevertheless still wrong.

Robinson Cano – Hit his 20th homer yesterday.  Not wrong here, because in the preseason I put him in the “Good value before we get to total Crapolanco” Tier.

Mat Latos – 7 IP, 2 baserunners, 0 ER in Atlanta.  I’m guessing a lot of people were sonavabenched on this one.

Jimmy Rollins – 2 HRs yesterday.  Coming up after the break, J. Rolled The Dorf.

Brad Lidge – No outs recorded, 3 earned.  Lidge has blown nine games this year, an 0-6 record and a 7.33 ERA.  If anyone happens to run into Lidge, give him my regards.  And, by regards, I mean the middle finger.  (BTW, On one team of mine, I had Lidge, Frank², Capps and Bell all give up runs and blow three saves.  Bad week to quit sniffing glue.)

Ryan Doumit – Obviously just needed the additional push of me putting him in Friday’s Sell.  He now has 2 homers in his last three games.

Travis Snider – Hit another homer yesterday and now two in three games.  I have an idea, stop Kemping him and move him up the order.

Carlos Pena – 2 HRs.  Six homers in the last week and a half.  On August 13th, I asked how many homers does Pena have left in his bat?  I gave the over/under of 13.  That means he has an over/under of 7 left.

Carlos Zambrano – 4 1/3 IP, 8 ER.  I admire Big Z for returning from the DL with a mustache, but this start did not make ’stached men proud.  No, sir.  Clay Zavada and I may need to have a word with him.

Josh Willingham – 4-for-4, 2 HRs, 5 Runs and 6 RBIs.  This is the total production of Jose Reyes’s 2009 season.

Zach Grienke – 8 IP, 2 ER, 15 Ks.  *speechless*

Adam Wainwright – 8 IP, 3 baserunners, 5 Ks.  His ERA is only .08 away from Greinke.  Cust kayin’.

Bronson Arroyo – 7 IP, 1 ER, 4 Ks.  Continued his post-All-Star break march of excellence.  He’ll fool someone next March who thinks he’s going to be good in April, May and June.

Felipe Lopez – 4-for-5 with his 8th homer.  He left the game in the ninth and is day-to-day.  It’s nice and all that he’s hitting .319, but 6 steals on the year is not buttering the biscuit.

Delmon Young – 4-for-5 yesterday.  Wait, Delmon Young actually had a good game yesterday?  Glory be!  Only 18 months after predicted.

Howie Kendrick – HR yesterday as he started only his third game in the last week.  In some ways, I kinda understand what Scioscia is doing with Kendrick’s playing time.  I mean, everyone on the Angels is slap-hitting .300 right now.  He could run out there Dick Schofield and he’d hit .300.

Laynce Nix/Jayson Nix – 3 HRs combined yesterday.  Their older brother, Jaymes Nix got drunk.

I’m sure even Kevin Gregg can’t believe he held the Cubs closer job as long as he did.  After witnessing Gregg’s sixth blown save and 12th gopher ball on Monday night, Piniella went into the locker room and flipped a table, screaming at a young, non-mustachioed Willie Randolph… Oh, wait, that was The Bronx is Burning.  Piniella says Carlos Marmol will take over the closer duties.  Carlos Marmol smiles, Kevin Gregg frowns and Angel Guzman shrugs.  John Grabow may also slide into the situational save picture when the Cubs face a lefty heavy ninth.  But, for now, Sweet Lou’s giving the ball to Marmol to save games.  As of today.  We shall see.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Travis Snider – Guess JP Ricciardi can’t swing a deal for Lincecum and the frozen body of Ted Williams, so Snider was called up.  Worth a flier in mixed leagues for the potential pop he can provide.  In one league, out of boredom, I dropped Ty Wigginton for Snider.  Oh, and Snider hit a homer yesterday.

Randy Ruiz – Hit his third homer in a week.  He’s 31-years-old.  You don’t get to be 31 and still a rookie without a giant pancake of mediocrity covering you.  Might continue to hit bombs for the rest of this season.  Or maybe just for the rest of this week.  My guess is he has a hot week in him, then he drops like a ton of 31-year-old rookie bricks.

Francisco Liriano – Headed to the Disgraceful List with Can’t Throw Effectivelyitis. I think he’s fallen to the point where he might actually be a solid sleeper in 2010 drafts.  We’ll have to wait for official word from February Grey as he rarely shares his info with August Grey.

Joe Mauer – 2 HRs yesterday as he bats .383 on the year.  After the game, he cured cancer.

Delmon Young – 2-for-5, 4 RBIs, his 2nd homer in the last three games and already has more homers this month than he had the entire 1st half of the year.

Ivan Rodriguez – The Rangers acquired Pudge (<–at one point this nickname wasn’t ironic).  Now the Rangers just need to acquire Jose Canseco and a bunch of syringes.  According to the Rangers, Pudge will be a backup.  I don’t see why they’d use him in that capacity.  I think most of Teagarden and Salty’s value is hurt with the addition of Pudge, not that they really had much value anyway.

Carlos Quentin – HR yesterday.  On one hand, I kinda want him to bomb the rest of this season so he goes quietly into next year’s draft.  On the other hand, I own him in a league and would like some production.  On the third hand, I want him to have surgery on his foot so there’s no problem next year.  He’s refusing surgery as of right now.  And, yes, I have three hands.

Freddy Garcia – 4 1/3 IP, 5 ER.  Right back where he left off!

Pedro Martinez/Jamie Moyer – Combined for a one run, 4 hitter.  If only Jack Lemmon and Walter Matthau were around to see it.

Alex Gordon – Was optioned to Triple-A.  As frequent commenter, Mr. Baseball, pointed out, Gordon could be a nice October call up.

Carlos Gonzalez – HR yesterday, now has 5 homers in the last seven games.  Not sure what you’re waiting for, loyal Razzball reader.

Clint Barmes – HR yesterday.  Without looking it up, who has more homers, Barmes or Hawpe?  Obviously if I’m pointing it out, it’s Barmes.  But that’s crazy.  Though I’m not sure it’s crazy good for Barmes or crazy bad for Hawpe.  I think it’s the latter, as in what Hawpe walked under before the season.

Ubaldo Jimenez – 8 IP, 2 ER.  Now has a 3.41 ERA on the year and on his way to 180 Ks on the year.  Aren’t you glad you own him and didn’t worry about whether or not he’s a Rockies pitcher?  Or don’t you wish you owned him and stopped worrying about owning a Rockies pitcher?

Lastings Milledge – Hit his first homer of the year yesterday.   Could be the start of something…

Ross Ohlendorf – 7 IP, 1 ER, 5 Ks as he got his 11th win yesterday and has a 4.15 ERA on the year.  What the ‘dorf?!  If you own Ohlendorf, you’re teetering between brilliance and insanity like an abstract painter or an MMA fighter.

Alex Avila – Hit his third homer yesterday as he bats near .450 through 20 ABs.  Worth a flier in AL-Only leagues, but he’s seeing less time behind the plate than Nicole Richie.

Matt Wieters – Hit his fourth homer to stay in front of Alex Avila, who has 180 less at-bats than Wieters.

Rick Porcello – 5 2/3 IP, 1 ER, 8 Ks vs. the Mariners.  For a guy with a 4.5 K/9, the 8 Ks can only mean one thing.  Porcello was imagining facing Ichiro Youkilis, Russell Youkilis and Franklin Youkilis aka The Big F-You.

Derek Lowe – 3 2/3 IP, 8 ER as he allowed the Mets to record ten hits in one inning, which was a new club record.  An offensive club record with Luis Castillo as your hitting star?  Lowe hadn’t looked that bad since Speidi’s wedding.  I know you wanna drop Lowe, but I wouldn’t.

Ricky Nolasco – 9 IP, 2 ER, 10 Ks.  Good to see him bounce back after his last outing left you muttering to yourself as you ate a pint of Mint Chocolate Chip.

Julio Borbon – 3-for-4, 3 steals as the Rangers stole 6 bases vs. Mauer.  Hey, he was out curing cancer!

Pat Burrell – Returned from a stiff neck with a homer.  He still has 19 to go to save his season.  I think he pulls up ten short, so he still has… You do the math!

David Price – 5 IP, 2 ER.  Price was mentioned in the rookie pitchers who might get shutdown whatchamacallit.  Now I’m hearing murmurs that Price could go to the bullpen for the return of Sonnanstine.  Act like ya know, MC Lyte!

B.J. Upton – HR yesterday.  That’s right!  You’re not the Secretaryman, you’re not the Administrativeassistantman, you’re the Bossman!  Now take charge!

Kyle Blanks – Hit an inside-the-park-homer.  The only explanation for a 300 lbs guy getting an inside-the-park-homer is the Cubs pulled their team from the field because Padres fans were littering the field with empty bottles of White Zinfandel.

The Orioles love their ex-Cubbies so they decided to sample some of their Pecan’t Pie rather than just hand the LF job to Nolan Reimold.  As with most of these rookies, a lot depends on starting jobs.  And Reimold doesn’t have one.  Yet.  So who’s blocking Reimold?  Luke Scott?  Who are you, Luke Scott?  A 30-something prospect?  Luke Scott must’ve called Matt Stairs for advice on how to prolong a major league career that should’ve ended years ago.   Go to the DL, Luke.  (He’s not there yet, but maybe if we all hold our breath.  What Razzballers want, Razzballers get!)  Then there’s Felix Pee-ay, who is crap-ay.  He was hurt in yesterday’s game.  Not to mention, many think his ship has already come and gone for prospect status.  If Reimold emerges from this O’s left fielder mess, he’s a slugger who we think could hit for power without costing you too much in the average department.  The nice thing about Reimold compared to a rookie pitcher — say, I don’t know, Hochevar! — is Reimold could slump for a week and only give you a few 0-for-4s, not a 36.00 ERA.  If we had to bet, we’d say the Orioles don’t bring him up in order to avoid giving him ‘Super 2′ status.  Why would we accuse the Orioles of leaving their best available player in the organization for a specific position in AAA?  Anyway, here’s what else we saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Kevin Youkilis – Youuuk can take a spot on the DL.  Thanks Sawx.  Instead of just putting him on the DL with his oblique injury, they kept him on the bench for 7 days before doing it.  Hey man – you might have a bunch of bench spots but us fantasy owners don’t!  The DL stint is backdated so he might only be out for another week or so but oblique injuries can be a wickid pissah of an injury.

Dan Haren – 7 IP, 3 ER.  “Johan, I think I heard Upton whispering to Byrnesie that they were saving their runs for Doug.  No, I’m not being paranoid!  Could you just come over?”

Stephen Drew – Returned from the DL.  Brother J.D. calls to ask, “They can DL you for less than 60 days?”

Ryan Ludwick – Pulled in the 1st inning with a hamstring injury.  That never sounds good.  If he has to go on the DL, LaRussa is down to two in his original 4 man OF rotation (Rasmus, Duncan).  We have a feeling LaRussa is trying to determine which young pitcher will make the better outfielder  – PJ Walters or Mitchell Boggs.

Chien-Ming Wang – 6 shutout innings in Triple-A.  I’ve already picked him up in a deep league (16 teams).  Hey, I had to get rid of Hocevar as quick as possible.  If you have an open DL slot, slide a Wang into it.

Chris Davis – 9th homer of the year and up to .231.  Hello, Mr. Reynolds.  Goodbye, Mr. Reynolds.

B.J. Ryan – Ricciardi said even when Ryan returns, Downs will be his closer.  Yeah, I trust Ricciardi when it comes to B.J.

Carlos Quentin – Out until Friday with a sore heel.  That’ll teach him to break bats with his foot.

Luke Hochevar – I was roofied and violated.  We won’t go into specifics.  But I think I’m done with rookie pitchers.  Wait… Against the A’s?  Really?  Bring back Ponson!  I hate you, Hochevar.  And I’m glad I can’t pronounce your name, it’ll be easier to forget.

Derek Holland – 1.74 ERA on the year as he got his first win.  He’s just working middle relief right now, but he could move into the rotation picture.  Wait, didn’t I just say no more rookie pitchers?  Damn you, Hochevar.

Kevin Slowey – 6 IP, 1 ER.  Great to see Slowey do what he’s supposed to do after Hochevar kicked my teeth in.

Armando Galarraga – 5 2/3, 5 ER. I gotta be honest, it’s nice to see a guy I thought would fail do exactly that.  Sorry, to his owners.  Scharmandofreude!

Manny Parra – 6 IP, 3 ER, 8 Ks.  Manny being Parra with the Ks, but not the walks (only 2).  Encouraging…  Oh, wait.  It was the Marlins.  They don’t walk.

Zach Duke – 8 IP, 1 ER.  Has only had two disasters through 7 starts, but he doesn’t strikeout out that many guys so I’m a little weary. His ERA should come up a full run, but it’s only at 2.52, so that’s not that bad.

Matt Capps – 3 baserunners, but worked a scoreless ninth with 2 Ks.

Brad Lidge – Gave up another run.  I’d continue to hold Madson, something seems off with Lidge right now.

Jayson Werth – 4 steals, including one of home.  I didn’t see it, but I have to assume Belisario fell for the ol’ “Hey, look over there!”

Jimmy Rollins – Hit 5th yesterday.  I’m sorry, but is that supposed to break him out of his slump?  By hitting him in the heart of the order instead of the top?  I don’t think this lasts.

Brad Hawpe – 4-for-4 with 1 HR and 5 RBI.  Now at .359 with 5 HR and 25 RBI.  Hawpe has never taken that next step like Holliday and we’d bet the under on .300, 30 HR, and 100 RBI.  While he’ll give you quality numbers, now might be the best time you’ll have to trade him.  He’s an awful fielder and, with Colorado’s OF depth, he should be deemed expendable if they are out of the pennant race come July.

Felipe Paulino – 4 IP, 7 ER.  Looked more like Ronnie Paulino in this start.  While Ronnie’s doing a number two.

Ian Stewart – A solo homer and a grand slam from the 8th spot in the lineup.  He has been struggling mightily and Sonovabenched us in a couple leagues.  He now has 2B/3B eligibility in ESPN (had it already in Yahoo!) and is still 3 games away from OF eligibility.  Hopefully this outburst leads to a couple more OF starts…

Ubaldo Jimenez – 7 IP, 1 ER.  Has now pitched three quality starts in a row.  The only terrible starts of the year (3 of them) were against the Dodgers (twice) and the Cubs.  So if we’re to believe this, he should be a “go pitcher” for his next start against the Pirates.

Daniel Murphy – Could see time at first with Delgado nursing a bad hip.  This doesn’t add a whole lot to his value, since Murphy was a borderline outfielder as it was.  You don’t really want him at 1st.

Joe Mauer – Fourth homer in his tenth game.  Sure does have a lot of *pinkie to mouth* Pauer.  Guess when you only play 80 games a year, you gotta get your stats in while you’re playing.

Delmon Young – .277 on the year with 1 homer and 2 steals.  Wow is this guy yawnstipating.

Conor Jackson – He’s now on the DL with a ‘general illness’ according to new GM AJ Finch.  I got an idea, send him to a “General Hospital.”

Jerry Hairston Jr. – 3-for-7, 3 RBIs and 2 steals in the last two games.  .343 in May with 2 homers.  Rudy snagged him before this mini-hot streak.  Might end tomorrow, but I wouldn’t be surprised if it holds up for another week or so.

Joey Votto – Left the game with dizziness.  I thought in Cincy it was called “Dustiness?”

Frank Francisco – Suffering from bicep tendinitis.  We picked up Wilson in a few leagues.  We’re frankly frankled about it but frankfully Francisco is supposed to be franking it up again in a couple of days.

Jordan Zimmermann – 6 IP, 3 ER.  With 8 Ks, he looked solid outside of two innings (1st and 4th).  But if you can’t beat the Aint’s, who can you beat? The Nats, actually.  But not if you pitch for them.  Conundrum!

Matt Cain – 7 IP, 4 ER.  God forbid I get a Win in a league.  Seriously, what the eff?

Joe Beimel – Almost got the save yesterday for those still torturing themselves with Nats relievers.

Pablo Sandoval – Game winning HR yesterday.  After the game, Pablo said through a translator, “San Francisco is my village and no one will pilfer it, except for I.”  His translator was dressed like a waiter at Medievel Times.  Very weird scene.