If you’re anything like me (and your office’s firewall is feeble or nonexistent), then I’m sure you’ve wasted countless hours clicking through the player cards on Baseball-Reference.com. It’s fun to get lost in the vortex of baseball history, absorbing interesting nuggets, like how Hawk Harrelson posted a 155 OPS+ in 1968. Of course, scientific analysis is overrated according to Hawk, so don’t bother telling him that the metrics suggest he was quite awesome that year. Baseball-Reference is also the place where I learn about player nicknames and Twitter handles and all that sort of nonsense that we simply cannot live without. But the most fascinating feature of the site is one that I was only recently made aware of — I’m sure it’s been there for awhile, so forgive me if you know about it already. Next time you’re visiting the website, click on the player search box and type “f**kface”, only leave out the censoring characters. Then search it, and enjoy. I have no idea why that particular player card shows up, but it’s hilarious nonetheless. Any insight on this topic would be appreciated in the comments section. Also feel free to focus your comments on the coming week’s two-starters, which are listed below.
As always, probable pitchers are subject to change. For a look at all fantasy baseball streamers, click that link. Please, blog, may I have some more?
I wish I was a mathematician or at least had one of those rad looking calculator watches. For now I will remain myself and take random, yet seasoned guesses at this thing that we covet so much, the save. It’s the only position that every person garnering save capability is owned in every league no matter how big or small, which makes it fun. They say all the fun is the chase, I guess that’s why I am bored with so many people tied up in my Gam-Gam’s basement. Digression, segue, punctuation. The Royals, or for better reference, Greg Holland, has figured out his mojo, while all of us hoping for a heated up Kelvin to pounce are reduced to wait for a Holland-days off. I am glad that Holland has shown what we all thought he could be, albeit for one glorious day. Two in a row is a winning streak, so said Lou Brown. So onto the rankings of closers and some of their ‘cuffs. This week’s random weird but true factoid, the Phillies are 13 games into the season and do not have a hold by any pitcher on their team. Put that in your cheese steak and smoke it Please, blog, may I have some more?
Ah Flexibility. It’s like when you were a kid, (or still are a kid) and you have to do that v-sit reach test. You stretch and stretch and in your mind you are awesome, but in reality there is some Romanian chick in your class name Nadia who can eat spaghetti-o’s one at a time with her naval and makes everyone look horrible. This, my friends, is all about the fake baseball flexibility, the laid back one where you pick Cheetos’s one by one out of your belly button, and that to me is grandiose. First lint and now artificially flavored cheese snacks — the world will never cease to amaze me, next thing you know we will put a man on the moon. So last week I gave a preemptive strike into the flexibility thing covering RP that will or may be starting come regular season and are only eligible at RP. Now I am covering some guys that will have both RP and SP, it’s like a fluffer and porn star all rolled into one. So with out the frills and more annoying hullabaloo here are some cats that have dual eligibility. Keep in mind that everyone plays with different settings, so I am only giving guys with 5 starts/5 relief appearances or more to be considered. Please, blog, may I have some more?
After the Orioles played 18 innings on Tuesday, delirium set it in and they said, “We’ve had two bean and cheese burritos since 6 o’clock and we have to pull a double shift ice trucking. Somebody gives us a Christian side hug right now or we’re calling up Dylan Bundy. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Let’s just skip the intro all together. You’re scanning this anyways, let’s be honest. I could put the deepest, darkest secrets of life and all its mystery in this first paragraph and you’re still going to skip it. It’s cool… no hard feelings. So without further time wasted and other hullabaloo, have a gander at the low end two-start pitchers for this week in fantasy baseball. Good luck. (Please note that pitchers and match-ups change.)
David Phelps (Tor vs Laffey, Bal vs Hunter) I saw the match-ups and my pants sorta don’t fit right anymore. Innings and depth in games should be your only concern, that and making sure your pork is cooked thoroughly. Please, blog, may I have some more?
With Yankees ace CC Sabathia placed on the DL with elbow inflammation, long-reliever rookie David Phelps slips into the Yankees rotation with a great shot of giving fantasy owners some spot starts while flashing a high K-rate and with an elite offense behind him. Please, blog, may I have some more?
The Rangers are thinking about calling up big-time prospect, Jurickson Profar. When I saw that news my eyes did the John Lithgow’s eyes when he sees the gremlin on the wing of the plane in Twilight Zone, The Movie. Then I started thinking, as I’m wont to do on occasion, Kinsler is on lock, Andrus isn’t going anywhere yet, Beltre and Olt can play 3rd, while Young can butcher all 4 positions and fly the “This guy is the heart of our team” flag. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Bryce Harper and Mike Trout were called up by their respective clubs this weekend. When Bryce left Syracuse for his first major league game, the grand opening of the “Eye Black Isn’t Just For The Ultimate Warrior And Owls” store turned into a Going Out of Business sale. When Mike Trout left Salt Lake for the Angels, Bobby Abreu’s three year Going Out of Business sale came to an abrupt end. Bobby, “I still have some seven-pitch walks to sell!” With Trout and Harper called up, the minor leagues were closed. There’s no more minor leagues. In his major league debut, Harper looked like all that and a bag of douche. Who over the age of twelve flips their helmet off when they’re running? Wait, is he over the age of twelve? Definitely more auspicious of a debut than Trout’s (or is that inauspicious?). (NSFWUYWAAPPH (Not Safe For Work Unless You Work At A Porn Production House): In case you didn’t see it, Harper roped a double to deep center while someone behind home plate dropped their pants. (Here’s Bryce Harper’s first major league hit in motion.) I can’t wait to go to Cooperstown in 25 years and see Bryce Harper’s 1st major league hit. The curator showing a group of middle school kids, “Here’s the film of Babe Ruth calling his shot and here’s Bryce Harper with a booty call.” In 50 years, Bryce Harper showing his granddaughter, “There’s your PawPaw getting his first major league hit.” “PawPaw, are you the one with your ass showing?” “No, sweetheart, that’s how fans celebrated baseball players when I played. A great time to be alive.”) Mike Trout, nor the fans behind him, flashed anything. Whatevs, I like him better for this year. Please, blog, may I have some more?
New York Yankees 2011 Minor League Review
Organizational Talent Rankings via Baseball America:
2012 (6) | 2011 (5) | 2010 (22) | 2009 (15) | 2008 (5) | 2007 (5)
2011 Affiliate Records
MLB: [97-65] AL East
AAA: [73-69] International League – Scranton
AA: [68-73] Eastern League – Trenton
A+: [74-64] Florida State League – Tampa
A: [55-85] South Atlantic League – Charleston
A(ss): [45-28] New York-Penn League – Staten Island
The Run Down
The Yankees system took a bit of a blow after losing Jesus Montero, but it’s still in good shape. Offensively, there isn’t much exciting going on at the high levels of the minors, but there are some high-upside guys (Sanchez, Heathcott) in A-ball. The pitching side of things is a little more interesting as a number of guys are primed to push through with into the bigs. The Scranton rotation this year will feature a group of arms, each of whom could surely occupy a major league role with a different organization. Please, blog, may I have some more?
New York Yankees 2010 Minor League Review
Overall farm rankings via Baseball America (2010)
2010 (18) | 2009 (15) | 2008 (5) | 2007 (7) | 2006 (17) | 2005 (24) | 2004 (27)
Record of Major and Minor League Teams
MLB: [95 – 67] AL East
AAA: [85 – 56] International League – Scranton/Wilkes-Barre
AA: [83 – 59] Eastern League – Trenton
A+: [78 – 57] Florida League – Tampa
A: [65 – 74] South Atlantic – Charleston
A(ss): [34 – 40] New York – Pennsylvania League – Staten Island
R: [24 – 32] Gulf League
The Run Down Please, blog, may I have some more?
For as much as the media lambasts the Yankees receive for trading their prospects, they have a wealth of talent that is often ignored.