All the final 2016 fantasy baseball rankings for hitters are done. For those that skipped today’s title, this starts the top 20 starters for 2016 fantasy baseball. This is NOT for 2017 (caps for those who can’t read titles; supposedly it’s easier to read caps, I have my doubts). This is a recap. Will these affect next year’s rankings? Sure. But not entirely. To recapitulate, these rankings are from our Fantasy Baseball Player Rater. We’re (me’re) using it to fairly gauge our (my) preseason rankings. Anyway, here’s the top 20 starters for 2016 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:Please, blog, may I have some more?
All my fantasy baseball titles seemed so far away.
Now it looks as though one is here to stay *sung in a very fast voice* oh, crap, nope, because I drafted Matt Holliday,
Oh, why did I believe in Holliday…day…day…day.
Suddenly! Jacob deGrom’s arm is not half of what it used to be.
There’s a shadow hanging over me,
Oh, it’s Giancarlo’s injured groin that I made of plaster of Paris and that just came to me suddenly!
Why the season had to go, I don’t know, it wouldn’t say… because it can’t talk, it’s a baseball season that ended yesterday…yesterday…yesterday!
Fantasy Baseball was such an easy game to play,
Now I need a mother’s basement to hide away.
Oh, I believe in yesterday…day…day.
*sniffles* Here, take a tissue. You have to excuse me, I don’t have any clean ones. What will we do for the next few months without an update on a Mets’ pitcher elbow? Does Daniel Murphy’s butt hurt or is he just butt-hurt? What will we do without a Bryce Harper injury update? WHAT? WILL? WE? DO? Prepare for next season, of course. But, first, let’s bask in the last day of the season. Today is the day when you realize you’ve spent 27,000 man hours this summer beating eleven other strangers to win a virtual trophy, and it feels great! Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
It’s truly a somber day here at Razzball Headquarters. Today marks the final day of the baseball season, so of course that means the final DraftKings write-up as well. I’m in shambles as I pen this. I’m sitting here with an almost-empty box of tissues just staring at my screen and crying my eyes out. In years past this might signal that my PornHub Gold subscription had come to an end. But that’s in the past. I’m much older now. Plus, my Mom cut my allowance in half so I don’t have the funds for that type of luxury any longer. What a jerk! Whatever though. Right? I mean, we’re here for baseball talk and that’s exactly what Honcho intends to give you. So we’ve reached game 162 on the schedule and hopefully, with the help of all the fantastic writers here, you’re a much better player than you were in April. Don’t fret, we’ll be back next season to lead you to the land of DFS riches. It kind of boils down to what Dr. Seuss and my ex-girlfriend’s are famous for saying: Don’t smile because it’s over. Cry because it happened. Wait. What!? Anyway, Here’s the deal for today. Pedro Alvarez smashes right-handers and guess what? The Yankees are sending Luis Cessa to the hill today. It’s almost like the DFS Gods are teeing one up for us. Alvarez has been fairly hot over his last 7 games – reaching base at a .385 clip, blasting a home run and producing a 1.021 OPS. On the road vs RHP this season, Alvarez has racked up a .390 wOBA, 145 wRC+ and .266 ISO. Is that any good? He’s also blasted 21 of his 22 home runs against righties. So there’s that. Wanna know what else is cool about Alvarez today? He’s priced at $3,700. That’s more than decent value for a lefty battling the short porch. In fact, this is so exciting that the neighbor kids would tell me that “It’s Lit!” Now GET OFF MY LAWN and go win some money!
Here’s a look at the rest of my picks for today’s slate:
New to DraftKings? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well reserve your spot in the 25 Team Razzball Exclusive League set to run Monday October 3rd to wet your DK whistle. Just remember to sign up through us before you do. Wanna know what the best part is about signing up with us? The free subscription for the rest of the season to our DFSBot, that’s what! For details on the how to, please visit our Razzball Subscriptions page.Please, blog, may I have some more?
I don’t understand this. The Padres’ Triple-A affiliate made a run for the Triple-A championship against the Yankees’ affiliate, so the Padres were holding down their top prospects to play in the championship. On the surface, it seems straightforward enough. Making run for championship, want best players there. Okay, I get that part. The part where I get lost, WHY DO YOU CARE IF YOU WIN A TRIPLE-A CHAMPIONSHIP?! Sorry, my keyboard got sticky the other day when Giancarlo returned. Don’t ask. The Padres are in the business of winning AAA championships? I don’t remember the Yankees keeping Gary Sanchez, Aaron Judge and Tyler Austin in Triple-A to help their Triple-A team. I’d love to go into the Padres’ front office, throw some furniture against a wall and start screaming, “Let’s win some major league games for a change!” They need a organization-wide readjustment, and Grey Albright, Fantasy Master Lothario (don’t abbreviate it), is just the man to do it! So, with this said, the Padres called up Hunter Renfroe and Manuel Margot (and some other guys). Margot and Renfroe, who sounds like a name that exists to only be said by Scooby Doo, are top 100 prospects. Margot is straight SAGNOF this late in the year, maybe could provide a few steals in the last ten days, and Renfroe is the exact opposite, with a chance to provide a few dingers. They’re not going to make much impact in ten days. Too bad they had a Triple-A playoff run to attend to first. Which they lost! Anyway, here’s what else I saw in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
Is there anything cooler than Samuel L. Jackson cursing? I mean seriously, I think even my Grandma would remark ‘he’s so sweet’ after watching this MF’ing montage (ummm, and I shouldn’t have to say this but that thing NSFW…you muthaf@#$a). I’m of course quoting Pulp Fiction, where Jules Winnfield kindly asks Pumpkin, aka Ringo to help Honey Bunny, aka Yolanda to, ahem, ‘regain her composure‘. And again, please read the damn title…you should know that it’s also NSFW. I mean, is there any SFW Tarantino film? Rhetorical! Let’s move on to the real reason you’re here, shall we? Yes, let’s. The cheap go for today is Chad Kuhl. Now I say this with some slight caveatism (<– totally a word). Would I prefer to see this matchup in Pittsburgh? Yeah. Would I prefer that Ryan Braun not be in the lineup today? Sure. But am I gonna pass on the fact that the Brew Crew leads the MLB in K%? Hells to the no, children. And just to clarify that ‘1st in K%’ statement, let’s break things down further. Home K%? Brewers are King. Full season K%? Tops there, too. Last seven days? Yup and in fact, they’ve upped the ante and are sitting at a huge 28.4% level, well above their season number at 25.4%. There are lots of safer choices for your cash games so I wouldn’t consider Chad there, but I’m all about him in tourneys today. So don’t panic and tell that Honey Bunny within yourself to be Kuhl as you roster Chad today. And with that, we’re off. Here’s my great vengeance and furious anger taeks for this Wednesday DK slate…
New to DraftKings? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well reserve your spot in the 25 Team Razzball Exclusive League set to run Monday September 26th to wet your DK whistle. Just remember to sign up through us before you do. Wanna know what the best part is about signing up with us? The free subscription for the rest of the season to our DFSBot, that’s what! For details on the how to, please visit our Razzball Subscriptions page.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Oakland rookie third baseman Ryon Healy continued to rake Friday night as he collected two hits and scored a run to extend his hitting streak to seven, with six multi-hit games in that span. Sometimes I get fantasy advice from good friend of mine and rapper 50 Cent, who is a much better fantasy baseballer than he is a real baseballer. In between freestyle seshs, Fitty says to me, “Yo D (he calls me D), you gotta get on Ryon Healy, if you been Patiently Waiting for a decent corner, dude is a P.I.M.P., get rich and buy Ryon, do-you-know-what-I-am-saying?” OK, thanks, Fitty. Not a bad headline either…also, funny, how you plugged a bunch of your songs there, but I guess these be tough times. He’s right though. Healy has been a certified G-Unit soldier in the month of September, batting .400, with 9 runs, 4 homers, 5 doubles and 12 RBI. If that ain’t a wanksta, I don’t know what is. Honestly, I really don’t. Is it bad or good? Regardless, in the past week the rookie has been very, very good. He’s hitting .517 with 8 runs, 3 homers and 9 RBI. That’s in seven days, people! How many more fantasy days left? Can’t be much more than seven, so sounds like Ryon Healy could be a nice player to own down the stretch. He was a BUY this week and I picked him up! 50 grabbed him too and he’s available in about 80% of leagues. Hate it or love it, pick him up if you want to win!
Here’s what else I saw Friday night in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
One of these Weavers just doesn’t belong…in the majors. We’ve got both Weavers going tonight and the two are near polar opposites. Luke Weaver is breaking his way into the majors, while Jered Weaver is pushing his way out. One is young (23), the other not so much (33). One throws a 92 MPH fastball and one throws about a 62 MPH fastball. Jered’s K/9 is about half (5.03) of Luke’s (11.32) and their xFIPs couldn’t be much different (2.79 for Luke, 5.75 for Jered). All of this is why one of these Weavers is a wonderful cheap DFS play (and streaming option in season-long leagues) and the other is a guy we love to stack against. Riddle me this DFSers, why then is Luke Weaver priced over a grand LESS than Jered Weaver? Luke checks in at a measly $5,200 and is my top pitching play of the night because of it. You might think it’s all small sample size so far for Luke Weaver, but digging into his minor league numbers you’ll see a 10+ K rate in AA with a FIP of 2.04 in 16 games. I’m buying, especially in a pitchers park (SF) tonight. Meanwhile, stack those Jays. Let’s look at a few more plays for tonight’s slate:
New to DraftKings? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well reserve your spot in the 25 Team Razzball Exclusive League set to run Monday September 19th to wet your DK whistle. Just remember to sign up through us before you do. Wanna know what the best part is about signing up with us? The free subscription for the rest of the season to our DFSBot, that’s what! For details on the how to, please visit our Razzball Subscriptions page.Please, blog, may I have some more?
You know how people write stuff on a grain of rice. With that in mind, on Rich Hill‘s blister this is written, “Took a whole lot of tryin’ to get up that Hill — R.I.P. Sherman Hemsley. I can’t believe I not only had room on this grain for an inspirational quote, but also room to attribute the quote to the wrong person and to also add in this meta comment about my inspirational quot–” Damn, he wasn’t able to fit everything. That’s the worst. That’s like when you’re writing a birthday card to someone and you start writing a note only to get to the end and need to start writing super-tiny and curved to fit it in. And that’s not the first time you’ve heard your curve is super-tiny. Rich Hill was perfect on Saturday — 7 IP, 0 ER, 0 baserunners, 9 Ks — but, to be honest, Hill has been perfect for the last two years (though only 29 IP last year). This year, 1.80 ERA, 0.96 WHIP with a 10.4 K/9 and 1.74 ERA over the past two years. So, ya know, your usual ace you get about 120 IP from. For 2017, it’s going to be hard to rank him much below the top 25 with the caveat that you’re only getting him for three to four months. Makes you wish rice grains were just a tad bigger to fit all of the superlatives on there for Rich Hill. Know what I mea– Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?
What’s good amigos!? We’re blessed with another Sunday. Only this isn’t any ordinary, run of the mill type Sunday. This is Week 1 of the NFL season and we should all rejoice. Not only because we’re all red meat consuming, patriotic, concussion cheering Americans, but this also marks the start of a unique daily fantasy opportunity. You see, most everyone else will be focusing on crafting their NFL lineups, while those of us “Baseball sharps” can take advantage of the money just begging to jump into our pockets. Yes it’s true…there’s still plenty of cash floating around in baseball contests and it’s your job to seek it out. Look for the contests that are guaranteed but might not fill up in time and apply the knowledge you have about September baseball ( Or what we provide here) and use it to your advantage. For example, you might really like a certain high-priced pitcher, but since his team is either out of the playoff picture or too far ahead of the pack to worry – he very well could be pulled after just a few short innings. So with that in mind, today we’re all climbing aboard the “Dream Weaver” train. Luke Weaver has a delicious matchup with the Milwaukee Brewers and it happens to be at home where he owns a 1.50 ERA and 1.00 WHIP. The Brewers have the worst strikeout rate in baseball, checking in at 25.2% and their .318 wOBA is merely average as it ranks 15th in the league. The Beer Makers check in with a 92 wRC+ which ranks in the bottom third of the league and their .161 ISO and .736 OPS register below league average as well. Though the sample is a bit small, Weaver owns a 4.43 K/BB & 11.16 K/9 ratio through 25 innings this year and he’s done this with a rather unlucky .358 BABIP. Wanna know the best part? Weaver checks in with a price tag of $4,800!!! Do I have your attention yet? Good. I’ll leave my pants on then. There’s really no need for me put on my Sunday chaps and give you the off-off Broadway version of “Dallas Buyers Club.” I’ll save that for another day.
Anyway, here’s the best of the rest of my Sunday suggestions:
New to DraftKings? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond? Well reserve your spot in the 25 Team Razzball Exclusive League set to run Monday September 12th to wet your DK whistle. Just remember to sign up through us before you do. Wanna know what the best part is about signing up with us? The free subscription for the rest of the season to our DFSBot, that’s what! For details on the how to, please visit our Razzball Subscriptions page.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Holy shizzballs. That’s not the Urban Dictionary definition of shizzballs either, which is when you shizz your grapes. That’s shizzballs as in this is the greatest display of sexiness since a young Kim Cattrall was featured in a window display. Brian Dozier is doing more for the long ball than any old man with shizzballs could ever imagine. That’s back to the original definition of shizzballs. Right now, Dozier is the exact perfect moment when your 12-year-old self pressed the buttons perfectly together on the old cable box and unscrambled Playboy TV at its best, with a perfectly scrolled, snowy version of Naughty Candid Camera. Trying to cover, when being caught, “It’s Allen Funt, mom. Uh…Maybe that’s not an F on the front of his last name.” Yesterday, Brian Dozier hit three more homers — 3-for-5, 4 RBIs, hitting .279 — and now has 38 homers on the year, and is easily leading the entire majors for homers in the 2nd half with 24 homers. For 2017, he’s going to be tough to peg, due to his inflated HR/FB% and falling line drive rate, but he doesn’t look much worse than a 25 HR/15 SB guy, which still has value. For this year, obviously you ride the lightning. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:Please, blog, may I have some more?