First off, Rudy is safe. We have him in a padded room with only marshmallows to eat. He’s a bit overcome by the absence of color, but it will be a good distraction while Bryce Harper is touch and go. Before we put Rudy where he wouldn’t hurt himself, Rudy said to me, “If Bryce Harper is hurt, will they cancel the rest of the season?” That’s a frown question, bro. Lie down, Rudy. It’ll be okay. Actually, could you lie down with your head hanging off the couch? You’re gonna leave a Soul Glo stain. I’m sure Rudy isn’t the only one feeling a bit woozy hearing Harper hurt himself last night. The entire eye black industry hangs in the balance. He left yesterday’s game with an apparent injury and that turned into an apparent diagnosis of an apparent bad bruise in his apparent side. Thanks for the apparency. This sounds like a day-to-day thing rather than a 15-day DL thing. So the worst thing that may come of this is for the next few days you won’t get as drunk if you take a tequila shot every time someone on Baseball Tonight mentions Harper. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

You, “Hey, look at that, I’m in a crazy/stupid/gooftarded deep league and everyone in this league that I’m talking to myself about is well-versed in this fantasy baseball shizz because they are also in this crazy/stupid/gooftarded deep league yet they forgot to draft Matt Holliday. Cool!” Yeah, that’s not going to happen. If you’re drafting from guys in the top 100 outfielders for 2013 fantasy baseball, your league is deep and you know you’re not going to get much from these guys. Potatoes to chips, most of these guys will be worth owning at some point in the season. In keepers and single league, uh, leagues, most should be owned from the jump, if ‘from the jump’ means what I think it does when kids say it. Now get off my lawn! Here’s all of the 2013 fantasy baseball rankings. If you’re joining us late, here’s the top 20 outfielders, top 40 outfielders, top 60 outfielders and top 80 outfielders. Anyway, here’s the top 100 outfielders for 2013 fantasy baseball:

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You could argue Mike Minor threw a slightly better game yesterday and deserved the lede, but you’d be arguing with a computer screen and over what should be the lede on a fantasy baseball blog.  It’s about time I gave Gio Gonzalez (7 IP, 0 ER, 3 baserunners, 9 Ks) some love after emoting all over myself in the preseason about how much I wanted Gio on every team.

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Adam Eaton went 2-for-6 with a run yesterday as the Diamondbacks called up their outfield prospect, and hit him leadoff.  The move is to fill in for Krispie, who’s out with a sore quad.  Krispie could return (he won’t go to the DL because with 40-man rosters, there’s no need to), but Eaton’s not coming up to play in one game a week.

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Last year, the Buy/Sell brought you such brilliant ideas as “Grady Sizemore is gonna bounce back big time!” and “I don’t believe a concussion can knock a player out for a full year… Can I get a Morneau?!”  Buy/Sell, “You know, I don’t point all of your crappy suggestions… Vernon Wells as a sleeper?  2003 called and said it wants its sleeper back.  You’re lucky I even returned this year.  A.J.

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Minnesota Twins 2011 Minor League Review

Organizational Talent Rankings via Baseball America:

2012 (19) | 2011 (13) | 2010 (6) | 2009 (22) | 2008 (15) | 2007 (8) | 2006 (6)

2011 Affiliate Records

MLB: [63-99] AL Central

AAA: [53-91] International League – Rochester

AA: [72-70] Eastern League – New Britain

A+: [63-76] Florida State League – Fort Meyers

A: [69-69] Midwest League – Beloit

R: [42-26] Appalachian League – Elizabethton

The Run Down

Much of the Twins best talent is years away from its arrival in the big leagues.  The club’s top prospect, Miguel Sano, is not yet 19.  He headlines a handful of talented prospects beneath the Double-A level, including Eddie Rosario, Aaron Hicks and Oswaldo Arcia.  With their first round pick in the June Draft, the Twins added Levi Michael out of UNC.  They hope the shortstop will add some polish to their system’s hitting prospects and climb the ladder quickly, though he’s yet to step foot on a ball field as a pro.

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Jered Weaver will not make his final start of the year because he doesn’t care about your H2H team.  Weaver ends the season with a line of 18-8/2.41/1.01/198.  If you throw out three bad starts, his ERA would’ve been 1.72 in 220 innings, but if if’s and but’s were candy and nuts no one would ever leave the bathroom.  Verlander’s gonna win the Cy Young, shizz is foregone.  Put it in an envelope and hand it to your mail carrier so he can steam it open and check it for cash.  Either way, let’s look at what Weaver did this year.  Mullet over, if you will.  Weaver was better last year.  Blunt is as blunt does right there.  His K-rate, xFIP and hair were all better.  His K-rate this year was right in line with past rates, if you exclude 2010.  For now, last year looks like the outlier for Ks.  Also, batters made contact with his pitches inside the strike zone at a higher rate than last year and hitters weren’t as fooled by pitches outside the strike zone.  In the end, he’s not going to be terrible in 2012; it’s just a repeat of 2011 seems unlikely, unless Superman circles the earth a few hundred times.

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