If good pitching beats good hitting most of the time, what does bad pitching do against good hitting?  Or even bad hitting?  Someone, somewhere (ok, in San Diego) will have to have a big day against Patrick Corbin.  I think it’s more than one player and yes, even the bad hitters.  I like my righty hitters against Corbin even in Petco.  Patrick has been terrible since coming back from TJS.  Last year he allowed 24 homers in 155 innings with a .286 BAA.  This year he’s only allowed 1 homer but still a .303 BAA with 7 BB and only 7 K in 16 innings.  Maybe he’ll get it back some day, but that day won’t be today.  Manuel Margot at $2,800?  Yes please.  Hunter Renfroe at $2,900?  He’s only got 1 K in 19 AB’s against lefties.  I think K rates stabilize the quickest so I’m in there as well.  Your usual suspects for the Padres…well suspect – Wil Myers at $3,800 – should also be considered.  Outside that, most (ALL) of my picks are against bad pitching.  Is there any other way?  Once again I’ll do it my way.  Ok, Frank’s way!  Either way….no regerts this week.

New to FanDuel? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond?  Well be sure to read our content and subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays.  Just remember to sign up through us before jumping into the fray. It’s how we know you care!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Greetings! Not only did opening week provide screen addicts everywhere an opportunity to put down the joystick for a few hours in order to put more focus into fantasy baseball, obsessing over each pitch like a scorned lover, pretending like any of this REALLY matters as we block out a myriad of life problems, but it provided me with an excuse to write a column, which is a big time win in my book. Heck yea! Super Cool! Sweetness!

Kudos to you if you’ve just recently discovered Razzball, for you are in store for the kind of magical journey you’ve only watched on film. Think ‘Hook’, ‘The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe’, the ‘Harry Potter’ flicks, ‘The Lord of the Rings’ Trilogy and ‘Basic Instinct’ all in one. Read further if you’d like to see me spread my legs for you, a la Sharon Stone… metaphorically of course.

I am Tehol Beddict and this is Disgrace/Delight. Take heed!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I feel like I could list every Boston Red Sox player in my post this week. A bunch of their players came down with the flu, even the untouchable Andrew Benintendi, who apparently threw-up in the dugout during a game this week. He might’ve ralphed due to hearing about his .174 AVG so far though. Relax everyone, he’s 14-years-old and we’re only in Week 2. Don’t overreact! However, if you happen to visit Fenway this week for their games — make sure to wash your hands well, seal up your plastic bubble boy suit and keep away from patient zero (probably Dustin Pedroia — he seems like the superstitious type to not wash during the season for luck).

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I wonder if Freddie Freeman has Fletch-like dreams where he pictures himself with a huge afro and his name is Freddie World B. Freeman.  “He’s actually 6-5, with the afro, 6-9.  Pretty good hands, loves to hit ones deep.  His club is behind by three, and World B. Freeman drains a three-run homer!  Wow, was that some kind of hit.  You know this kid from the gritty streets of Orange County, California sure can play.”  By the way, gritty in Orange County refers to a Sonic Drive-In that has a B grade from the Health Department.  So, yesterday, Freeman put up those stats that I told you to pay a 2nd round price for — 4-for-5, 3 runs, and a double slam (1, 2) and legs (1), hitting .346 on the year.  I was truly perplexed how low I saw some people ranking Freeman in the preseason.  If anything, I think a stronger case could’ve been made to have Freeman ranked above Miggy, who was a consensus top 12 pick everywhere.  Guess Freeman could use the name Mr. Under-ranked when he sneaks into country clubs to visit Dansby Swanson (1-for-5, 1st homer, hitting .179).  Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Moogly-boogly!  It’s been a long winter.  The Buy/Sell Column’s back, helping you know when the hell you’re supposed to stop working early on Friday.  During the offseason, while you were diddling and thinking about how your middle school nickname was Skidmark, I, The Buy/Sell Column was re-reenacting scenes from Moonlight with puppets in the BBQ Belt of Alabama because I’M HARDCORE!  You want some Rip Taylor-wannabe, throwing confetti at your feet or you want a Buy/Sell Column that simulates puppets having hand-sex on a beach to a very anti-puppet sex audience!?  Like Jose Altuve trying to get the Cocoa Puffs, you want the latter!  Okay, enough of the hubbub on the tomfoolery, I’m in on Tyler Saladino.  Last year, Saladino had eight homers and 11 steals in only 298 ABs while hitting .282.  One year in the minors, he stole 38 bases, and, one year in the minors, he hit 16 homers.  Put that together, and you have Francisco Lindor!  Okay, kidding, but he’s hitting leadoff, is eligible at 2B and SS, and can get a few homers while also stealing some bases.  And I’m not excited about him simply because I named one of my puppets in Alabama, Tosser Saladino.  My love for Saladino did not start when I heard he had a brother named Cucumber Saladino.  Wrong, I don’t love Saladino simply because I’m in LA and I picture him topped with wheatgrass.  Eff your wheatgrass, Los Angeles!  Anyway, here’s some more players to buy or sell this week in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

It’s my first post of the year.  I’m so excited!  Thursdays are short schedule days and there’s a nice choice of players this week but still less games means others will have the same plays as you.  Especially if they follow my lead.  Ha!  By the way, has there been a James Shields citing, er siting yet this year?  He should be cited for his performance last year.  You don’t need a coat of arms on your shield today.  But Big Game James will need to protect his arm…and probably neck.  Shields was big time terrible with the White Sox last year after his trade from the Padres.  He gave up a 1.70 whip along with 31 home runs in 119+ innings with the Pale Hose.  Twenty three of those were in 78 US Cellular Field innings.  Shoot, he’s allowed SEVENTY-THREE home runs in his last 384 innings.  That’s a lot of WHIPlash from hard hit balls.  It’s time to play your Tigers.  The Tigers as a team have hit a whopping .299 with 12 home runs in 288 at bats.

I’m all about extra at bats in my daily fantasy games.  Number one and two and three hitters are my favorites.  And if they hit on a team ready two go off on a bum pitcher, even better.

Here’s a look at my picks for Thursday April 6.

New to FanDuel? Scared of feeling like a small fish in a big pond?  Well be sure to read our content and subscribe to the DFSBot for your daily baseball plays.  Just remember to sign up through us before jumping into the fray. It’s how we know you care!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Somewhere, Melissa Leo is acting out today’s title and it’s so spot on you’re not sure if you should applaud, or put your wallet in the front pocket.  “I came straight from the packie because I heard you were having a sale on shamrock undergarments.  Are you having a shamrock undergarment sale or not?”  That’s Melissa Leo acting out the title.  Okay, okay, okay, guys and six girl readers and one girl writer. (She debuted yesterday; is there a female verb for that?  She debutante’d yesterday?  She debbie’d yesterday?  She damsel’d yesterday?  I’m asking, don’t roll your eyes at me like I’m a moron; I’ve had enough of that!)  Chris Sale looked great yesterday (7 IP, 0 ER, 4 baserunners, 7 Ks), but you knew he was going to look great.  You didn’t draft him in the first three rounds for him to look like hot garbage under Pablo Sandoval’s ass.  Or, rather, you didn’t not draft him in the first three rounds because I told you not to.  But you know who looked as good in Fenway?  Jameson Taillon (7 IP, 0 ER, 8 baserunners, 6 Ks).  He doesn’t miss a huge number of bats — will average around 7.7 K/9 — but his control is masterful.  He will have around a 1.7 BB/9, if not lower.  When a guy has a difference of six between his K/9 and BB/9 great things can happen, and Taillon will be no different.  I’m not sure if he’ll get all the way to 190+ IP this year, but he had a 3.38 ERA last year, and I’m ready for around the same this year, if not better.  Like Melissa Leo would say, “This guy is fahkin spacktackulure.”  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

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Last year, this post and the 2nd basemen to target were necessary evils like changing underwear.  Whether you wanted to or not, it was a good idea to take a flyer on a late middle infielder, and you were still expecting to get crapped on.  Now?  Well…. I like some late middle infielders, could see owning one, but there’s a ton of early, sexy-AF middle infielders, so there’s a chance I own an MI before I even reach the 100th pick overall.  In other words, I could own a shortstop, 2nd baseman and shortstop or 2nd baseman all in the first eight or so rounds.  Yeah, crazy time we live in.  In no other way is it a crazy time, except for fantasy baseball.  Then again, I have the 2016 election results on my DVR and I haven’t watched yet.  No one ruin the surprise!  This is a (legal-in-all-countries-except-Lichtenstein) supplement to the top 20 shortstops for 2017 fantasy baseball.  The players listed have a draft rank after 200 on other sites.  Click on the player’s name where applicable to read more and see their 2017 projections.  Anyway, here’s some shortstops to target for 2017 fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

It took us a few weeks, but we have arrived at the finale. We can finally wrap up the Couch Managers 2017 Industry Mock Draft recaps. It feels like just yesterday I was getting started on what was likely to be a 60,000-word article on all 23 rounds of this mock draft before Grey slapped me and told me to put down the bourbon and split this into multiple posts. Below, I’ll be posting the results of rounds 19-23, my thoughts on said results, and the final team for every owner.

In case you have yet to see my previous posts, here is a quick recap of the league rules for this mock:

This mock was for a 15-team, 5×5 roto, with 23 roster spots made up of 9 pitchers (9), 1 spot for each position (8), a second catcher (1), 2 more outfielders (2), one corner infielder (1), one middle infielder (1), and one utility position (1).

Links to previous recaps:

Now, let’s get rounds 19-23 out of the way so that we can get to the good stuff!

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Greetings, friends. I hopped over to the football side of things once last year’s baseball season ended, but now I’m back. And apparently, I am such a disturbed individual that I am doing fantasy baseball mock drafts in early January. And, I am writing about them. And, well, I just wanted to start another sentence with and because it feels so wrong but so right at the same time. Anyway, moving on.

I was fortunate enough to be invited to the Couch Managers 2017 Industry Mock Draft, and we’re going to recap it here. This mock was for a 15-team, 5×5 roto, with 23 roster spots made up of 9 pitchers (9), 1 spot for each position (8), a second catcher (1), 2 more outfielders (2), one corner infielder (1), one middle infielder (1), and one utility position (1). As long as I did that math correctly, that is 23 spots.

Below, I will provide the results for the first six rounds and a give my thoughts for each round. I’ll do the same for rounds 7-12, 13-18, and 19-23 in subsequent posts. I’ll try to keep it brief. All we really care about are the results here, right? Feel free to tell me how awesome or crappy you think my team is, along with what you think were the best and worst picks of the draft or the different rounds…

Please, blog, may I have some more?