In opposite world, news that Andrew Bailey hurt himself comes as a complete shock. Here’s what I said in the top 20 closers for 2011 fantasy baseball, “Is it me or is this the news once a month for him, “Andrew Bailey has been cleared to start throwing.” Hey, Bailey, throw already!” And that’s me quoting me!Please, blog, may I have some more?
When Jim Edmonds was a trending topic on Twitter, I figured he died. Turns out he was just taking the Casino Bus to Cincy, though that might be a riverboat. Edmonds will continue to be a part-timer, gaining no value. Maybe one day he’ll garner 25% of a HOF vote and the interwebs will go abuzz with the travesty of it all.Please, blog, may I have some more?
When doctors said Aaron Harang is going to have a useless part of his body removed, everyone in the Reds clubhouse thought the same thing, “What is Willy Taveras doing in Harang’s body?” If Dusty were a doctor, he would left Harang’s appendix in a few more innings.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Oh, they’re not just bad. Nah, I outdid even myself this time. On this drafternoon, I picked a team that is near-perfectly awful. They simultaneously suck and blow. On a scale of one to ten, they’re a negative seven. I did the math!Please, blog, may I have some more?
All of these rookies are worth grabbing at the right spot, but I wouldn’t reach for any of them. Sorry if that sounds boring, but sometimes Grey needs to instill some right-wing fantasy baseball conservatism into the equation. Longoria, Soto, Tulowitzki, Braun, Michael J.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Yesterday, Luis Ayala was acquired by Mets. You know that thing about the girl you don’t know is better than the one you’re with? The grass is greener thing. Yeah, the Mets just got themselves a new girl. Why? Wagner’s old and he just had a setback (of course) so he’s not coming back as soon as thought.Please, blog, may I have some more?
But the White Sox were able to go back-to-back-to-back-to-back. That’s quadrupling your pleasure. Or double-double-headed. Which makes you say whoopee for fantasy baseball, right? Seriously, you say whoopee. Yeah, you do. You and Bob Eubanks. But if someone asks you the most romantic place you’ve ever made whoopee, don’t say, “Up the butt.” Now there was something in the middle of this landmark real baseball feat that you should take notice of — Paul Konerko.Please, blog, may I have some more?