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K:BB.  Mmmm can’t think of a sexier group of three letters.  Double D’s are nice but that’s only two letters.  JB is only two letters.  So if you have to go to three letters, I’ll take K:BB.

A guy I’ve liked for a while now, Corey Kluber came into yesterday’s matchup against the Nationals with a sparkling 57:12 K:BB ratio so far this season.  Don’t believe me that he’s been my man crush the past month?  Look at phone records to Sky or my friend Peter.  Just ask the NSA, they’ve got them saved somewhere…  Kluber has been around a while, pitching in the Minors since 2006 with consistent strikeout numbers, but other than that never has put it completely together. Now 27 years old, Kluber is suddenly owning MLB offenses.

As soon as I saw Kluber’s numbers last month before he was the talk of the town, I went and looked at his pitch selection.  He’s completely changed his arsenal from a slider as his main breaking offering into tossing a cutter as his second pitch.  Does that remind you of any other Cleveland Indian who had late(r) career success?  Reminds me of Cliff Lee!  Ok so I’m not saying Kluber is the next Cliff Lee, they’re very different pitchers, but it is interesting.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Today is the first day of the next month in our lives without Giancarlo Stanton. If you want, I’m holding a candlelight vigil in the garbage can behind Stanton’s house. If you come, don’t make too much noise. We aren’t technically supposed to be there. The good news about his hamstring injury is when he’s limping away from us, it’ll be a lot easier to stay exactly 501 feet away. Before he’d backpedal and it was like we were doing the lambada with 501 feet between us. The bad news is I’m writing this post with tears. Hnfcsdcnnn. That was a big, stupid tear that got away from me. Short circuit my keyboard, tears. I plead with you, so I don’t have to continue. I wonder if I can seal envelopes with these tears. That would be turning lemons into lemonade, right? Ow, I just touched my eyes, and now these lemons are burning my eyes. This is the sourest injury news ever. Make the pain go away, alcohol! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?