Fantasy Baseball Advice

Guess what, ya’ll?! New closer in Atlanta. That’s right the Braves lost Peter Moylan to an injury so Manny Acosta takes over until Soriano returns. Soriano is due back soon, but he’s injury-prone so this may seem flippant, but Accardo came out of nowhere to save a lot of games last year. You never know where saves are going to come from, but we know they will be coming from the new (fill-in) Atlanta Braves closer, Manny Acosta. Anyway, here’s what else I saw:

Alfonso Soriano - Was hurt catching the ball. He didn’t look good at all being helped off the field. Maybe Murton time? I picked up Murton in one NL-Only league, just in case.

Michael Bourn - All he does is steal bases. No, seriously, that’s all he does. Is it me or are there more all-speed, nothing else guys now than ever? Bourn, Gomez, Gathright, Taveras, Pierre, a third of the Giants lineup, etc. It’s a renaissance for speed guys. It’s like someone cracked down on power-enhancing drugs or something. Weird!

Andruw Jones - I said this about three months ago, but he seriously may be retired within three years. He’s lazy, ya’ll.

Erik Bedard - Hits the DL. Yeah, and doodie smells.

Jose Valverde - He was not a reliable closer before last year. Don’t forget about Brocail.

Jair Jurrgens - He walked Willingham on a questionable pitch (who stole his second base of the day!) then Jacobs got a clean double to score one run. Then Willingham inexplicably hit a triple later in the game. Jurrgens looks great so far. I hope people are paying attention. BTW, April 17th is Benihana Thursdays in Marlins Stadium! (I can’t even imagine what this is, but it sounds wonderful. Maybe Alfredo Amezaga flips shrimp tails into his shirt pocket?)

Shawn Chacon - I’m sure glad I have him on my Razzball team. Ugh. Maybe Pineiro can throw a shutout later in the week.

Mark Teixeira - He’s starting slow. Yeah, and doodie still smells.

Derrek Lee - He’s headed for a big year.

Chad Qualls - Might be slowly working his way into the closer role.

Aaron Hill - Could be very valuable to balance out your fifth outfielder who only steals.

Aaron Harang - I know it’s a little consolation because I have him on a few teams too, but the wind was blowing out big time in Wrigley.

Joey Votto - I’m getting the sneaky suspicion that Dusty might actually play him regularly.

Krispie Young - 13 hits, five of which are home runs, with 18 strikeouts for a .228 average. Cust kayin’.

Major league closers are probably in the highest stress position on their team. So I guess it’s only appropriate that they cause us the most agita. I’ve already explained that I won’t draft any closers in the first tier. Rudy Gamble broke down why he does grab a closer in the first tier. Anyway, what are these tiers and who are in them? Here’s all the closers and their setup men going into the 2008 season. Side note, closers need guile, charisma and whole lot of I-just-don’t-give-a-fark, not unlike some of the characters that were portrayed on The Wire, a show that I’m sadder to see end than any in past memory. So in honor of the series finale of The Wire, I’ve named the tiers after some of The Wire’s more memorable characters.

Clay Davis – This tier comprises closers that will make you smile every time they make their appearance. Papelbon is lights out on arguably the best team in the majors. Nathan has a track record that is better than anyone in the game, except for maybe Rivera, but has an age advantage. Putz’s numbers last year were Cy Young-worthy and there’s no reason to think he can’t be as good this year. K-Rod’s delivery has made the critics say he’s doomed for the DL and every year he’s great. Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit!

1. Jonathan Papelbon, BOS (Hideki Okajima)
2. Joe Nathan, MIN (Pat Neshek)
3. J.J. Putz, SEA (Brandon Marrow)
4. Francisco Rodriguez, LAA (Scot Shields)
5. Mariano Rivera, NYY (Joba Chamberlain)

Omar Little – This tier compromises closers that have the emotion and the stuff to get the job done, but they could get taken out at any time. Francisco Cordero ventures to a hitter’s park. Member what happened to him in Arlington? Chad Cordero may not be long for the Nats, but he’s shown he can close a game as well as he can wear a low, wide-brimmed hat. Saito is backed by the most obvious closer-in-waiting. I don’t even think Jenks believes the year he had last year. Soriano has some of the nastiest stuff in the game, yet still gives up dingers. Capps might end up the most reliable from this group, but on far the worst team.

6. Francisco Cordero, CIN (David Weathers)
7. Chad Cordero, WAS (Jon Rauch)
8. Takashi Saito, LAD (Jonathan Broxton)
9. Bobby Jenks, CHW (Octavio Dotel)
10. Rafael Soriano, ATL (Peter Moylan)
11. Matt Capps, PIT (Damaso Marte)

Proposition Joe – This tier comprises closers that are no newcomers to their position of stress, and they will be absolutely fine this year as long as nothing unforeseen happens. Wagner, Hoffman and Isringhausen should all be trusted, but all three can remember when Hoffman’s entrance song was new, so there’s the age thing. Valverde can save 45 or he can be sent back to the minors to figure things out.

12. Billy Wagner, NYM (Aaron Heilman)
13. Trevor Hoffman, SDG (Heath Bell)
14. Jose Valverde, HOU (Oscar Villarreal)
15. Jason Isringhausen, STL (Ryan Franklin)

Stringer Bell – This tier comprises closers that have the stuff for the long haul, but something tells me their tenure isn’t going to last long. Corpas has good stuff, but Fuentes was more than serviceable. A few hiccups from Corpas and he could end up figuring things out in the seventh inning of blow outs. Huston Street will be traded, maybe to a team that doesn’t need someone for the ninth. Howry and Marmol will share the lion’s share of the saves. Brian Wilson is hardly safe as there’s already grumblings that Tyler Walker will get some opportunities. Soria’s on the Royals and Ryan’s recovery is too fast to not spell trouble.

16. Manny Corpas, COL (Brian Fuentes)
17. Huston Street, OAK (Joey Devine)
18. Bob Howry, CHC (Kerry Wood, Carlos Marmol)
19. B.J. Ryan, TOR (Jeremy Accardo)
20. Joakim Soria, KAN (Joel Peralta)
21. Brian Wilson, SAN (Tyler Walker, Brad Hennessey)

Marlo Stanfield – This tier comprises closers that are fit to do the job, but the men behind them are more badass and better suited. Brandon Lyon better watch out for Tony Pena. Kevin Gregg has two looming in Lindstrom and Tankersley. Sherrill better look out for the entire bullpen. Borowski and Todd Jones, Betancourt and Rodney, respectively.

22. Joe Borowski, CLE (Rafael Betancourt)
23. Todd Jones, DET (Fernando Rodney)
24. Brandon Lyon, ARI (Tony Pena)
25. Kevin Gregg, FLA (Matt Lindstrom, Taylor Tankersley)
26. George Sherrill, BAL (entire bullpen, namely Greg Aquino, Jamie Walker and Chad Bradford)

Ziggy Sobotka – This tier comprises closers that you hope die, whether you own them or not. I liked Lidge two months ago, now he’s injured and I wouldn’t trust him to carry Barmes’s deer meat. Gagne will make you wish you drafted Garrett Anderson in the 18th round. If Wilson makes it out of spring training as the closer, he won’t last until tax day as the sole closer. Percival was retired this time last year. Nuff said.

27. Eric Gagne, MIL (Derrick Turnbow)
28. C.J. Wilson, TEX (Eddie Guardado, Joaquin Benoit)
29. Troy Percival, TAM (Al Reyes)
30. Brad Lidge, PHI (Tom Gordon)

Just back from the Writer’s Strike picket line (Jesse Jackson shook my hand and said, “God Bless.” I said, “Fight the Power!”) when I heard Brad Lidge (and Eric Bruntlett) got traded to the Phillies for Michael Bourn, Geoff Geary and Michael Costanzo. Pujols made Lidge his bitch two seasons ago and Lidge has had to fight every step of the way back. Is he fully back yet? His wildness says probably not entirely, but this is still a coo for the Phillies. Think about it this way, if someone in your NL-only league traded Lidge for Bourn, protests flags would have flown. The Astros received three spare parts for an at-times absolutely dominating closer. Not dominating, you say? He held hitters to a .218 average and averaged 11.8 strikeouts per nine innings. Um, that’s dominating. Lidge needed to get out of Houston in a bad way; Myers needed to get back in the rotation before his career was completely derailed. Phillies–Win-win, Astros-lose.

Can the Astros get by on Chad Qualls?
6-5/78/3.05/1.32, 5 saves in 82.2 innings
Averaging almost a strikeout an inning, he’ll be just fine. His cheap and pretty solid. I predict teams will move and more to the cheap, solid setup man instead of the high-priced closer. Though, if you have to pay for one, Lidge isn’t a bad one at all. Not content with simply catching the Mets this year, the Phils will be a force in the NL East. I’ll tell you what, I’d rather have Lidge than the Billy Wagner we saw at the end of the year.