Growing up one of my favorite films was Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade. The movie has everything; boat chases; hot Austrian scholars turned Nazi’s, Sean Connery, Knights, the Holy Grail and one of the greatest scenes in movie history. If you haven’t seen it *spoiler alert*,(actually can you give a spoiler alert if a movie is 25 years old?) in one of the last scenes of the movie Indy has to go through a series of booby traps and make choices on how to conquer them based on his knowledge of Jesus. BT-dubs doesn’t booby traps seem like it could be Justin Verlander’s current issue? Maybe he’s trapped by the power of Kate Upton’s assets and spends most road trips locked in his hotel room getting to second base? Anyyyyy way where was I? Oh yeah the booby traps! After making his way through the obstacles Indy ends up in an old dusty room at the back of a cave guarded by one of a collection of Knights whose sole duty is to protect the Grail. In order for Indiana to get access to the Grail and save the day he must choose between bevies of gaudy cups and find the true Grail. At this moment the Knight urges him to choose wisely! If you haven’t seen it watch the clip here. Either way where I’m going with this is we are presented with a far less dramatic choice every day when playing daily fantasy games on DraftKings. There are several approaches and strategies and someone is lying if they tell you they approach each day’s games the same as the day before. Sometimes you’re better off investing in hitting, and other times you’re better off splashing the dollars on arms. No one approach holds true every day. For example for today’s early games the pitching options are limited to say the least and I couldn’t blame you for going cheap on pitching and spending on hitting. The night games are slightly better with Stephen Strasburg, Garrett Richards, and Shelby Miller all seeming like solid plays.

Speaking of choosing wisely, you can start your day of good choices off by playing DraftKings with us. In fact if you haven’t played DraftKings before you can play for free by signing up here. For all newbies and experienced players alike, I will post a link in the comments to play with me and some of the other Razzball writers in a league. Without further ado below are the Razzball picks for Saturday June 14th.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

I get so funny with the money that you flaunt
I said where’d you get your information from huh?
You think that you can front when revelation comes

Yeah, you can’t front on that

Yo Yo Yo’s we iz takin’ it back to ’92 with the baddest trio of white boys since Richie,Potsie and Ralph. The Beastie Boys are probably the best ever to drop lyrics for all the suburban kids to feel fresh too. Seriously, after this song came out every kid went out and bought a beanie and made it a staple that to this day has gotten a little ridiculous. By the way, why the hell do people wear beanies when it’s 100 degrees outside? I don’t get it. You can look like this guy and that’s not a good thing. Sorry back to the Beasties and this game changing jam. Oh damn, what am I doing? This is suppose to be about DraftKings. Let’s get funny with our money and drop the $10,700 today on Michael Wacha. He’s worth it. You might ask where I get my information from?…Huh? The Royals have been pretty blaherrible for fantasy purposes. Collectively they can do some damage but I’m willing to bet they won’t. Wacha’s K-rate sits at a very pretty 9.20 with a walk rate at 2.33. He faces Yoradno Ventura who is coming off an elbow issue and has given up 9 earned runs over his last 8.2 innings and as much as I like K’s I also like to get the W when I invest this much. The other options for the afternoon set is not as sexy and if I’m gonna be spending, I want to spend on sexy. Before I move on I was flipping through Beastie Boy videos on You Tube and was reminded of how good videos used to be. Here is my top 5 all time 5) No Sleep Til Brooklyn 4) Intergalactic 3) Fight for Your Right (To Party) 2) Hey Ladies 1) Sabotage Please post your own favorites below and let’s talk about it.

Oh you thought I was jumping to player profiles? Ha! Actually the Guru did a great job yesterday of providing tips and jokes for the newbies. It’s a great game and I alway tell you all to come join us. If you are feeling a little apprehensive we can keep it our little secret. If you decide to play I suggest using the DFS-Bot as a baseline first. Then go look for what you think is a good value. We are essentially making a lineup of batty calls and streamers. Honestly you can spend 20 minutes and get a good grasp on what your lineup should be. Please don’t hesitate to ask as many questions as you want in the comments. That is what we are here for. You can look me up on DraftKings too, my handle is J-FOH.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

If you’re a regular listener to the Razzball Hot Sheet and Razzball Radio then you know I wear a handsome turban and we Razzicians love our wOBA. “Guru, what the hell is wOBA?” That’s a great question disembodied voice of Razzball Nation that sounds slightly like my ex-girlfriend. Brenda, stop stalking me! When it comes to my daily routine for DraftKings there are a few things I do: 1) Drink a Bloody Mary. 2) Check the daily salaries, cross out the overvalued guys. 3) Check the weather and the Vegas lines. 4) Look at batter vs. pitcher stats then ignore them. 5) Dive into the wOBA and drink another Bloody. Basically, wOBA (weighted on-base average) is a way to measure a hitter’s overall offensive performance. wOBA is calculated by giving a value to each type of offensive stat including walks, singles, doubles, etc. with the player’s totals for each being combined and then divided by their total plate appearances to arrive at their weighted on-base average. That explains why I have this tattooed on my chest all Memento-style: (0.72 x NIBB) + (0.75 x HBP) + (0.90 x 1B) + (0.92 x RBOE) + (1.24 x 2B) + (1.56 x 3B) + (1.95 x HR) / PA. Math is fun! Thanks, handy abacus. If you’re curious to learn more check out The Book: Playing the Percentages in Baseball by Tom Tango and some other aliens that have a love for baseball stats and anal probing.

We have 12 games on the night slate with a couple aces on the mound in Clayton Kershaw and Felix Hernandez along with some pricey big bats that’ll make putting together a solid team a challenge. Fortunately, we have the Hitter-Tron, the Stream-o-Nator and the DFSbot to help us out. Is that cheating? Hell, no! We’re Razzaholics. Let’s get to it, here’s your dirty turbaned Guru’s all-wOBA team for Wednesday 5/28. Of course all these players won’t fit on one team, but there’s a good chance you can get more than a few of them in tonight.

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Nolan Arenado left last night’s game with a left mallet finger fracture. Despite how it sounds, he suffered the injury sliding head first into second base, and not from a giant sledge hammer. That’s a broken middle finger for the laymans. The team is saying Arenado could be sidelined for 4-6 weeks, but likely more if he opts for surgery. Oh Nolan, you could really use that middle finger right about now. Arenado has been every bit the dream Coors third baseman we all thought he could be this year, triple slashing a mean .305/.333/.489, with six home runs and 28 RBI. This is just bad news. The good news? Razzball favorite and general disappointment to fantasy owners, Josh Rutledge will be called up to replace Arenado on the roster. I like to think anyone playing in Colorado is worth a look and JR is no exception, especially if you’re hurting at the hot corner. Rutledge did well in limited time with the Rockies in April, batting .318 with a home run in 22 ABs. He played 88 games in 2013, but struggled to hit for average despite flashing some speed and power, and was eventually sent down. In 12 team leagues, I might hold off on grabbing Rutledge until he shows us something, but I’ll be watching him as intensely as the last three episodes of Breaking Bad. Here’s hoping he can fill the Nolan Arenado-sized hole in our hearts until that finger fully heals.

Here’s what else happened in fantasy baseball Friday night:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

King Salomon Brothers, the overseer of the Iron Bank, was mortgaging castles that he shouldn’t have been and fighting to get repaid, so he decided to sell his crown that was bespeckled in quinoa and Boca Burgers. The crown itself was worth more than all castles together. The world could be saved of economic ruin if the crown could get safely to the world’s largest pawn broker, Wei-Yin Chains. Unable to leave the kingdom himself, King Salomon Brothers gave Prince Fielder the crown, entrusting it to his overweight son, knowing if there was one person not interested in the healthy adornments on the crown it would be he. Unfortunately, heavy is the neck that wears Prince’s crown, and he gobbled up the crown like he gobbled up all the fantasy trust I put in him when I drafted this man the size of four horses. Goddammit! Dubya tee eff, doode! You can’t put on a neck brace and get up to bat? Shoot some cortisone is your cellulite! DAH!!! The only positive in this travesty that has befallen the fattest POS in the seven kingdoms? You’ll get to drop him! Fielder exclamation mark, exclamation mark, exclamation mark, I hate you. Sincerely, Your Drafter. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

If any good can come from Joey Votto going to the DL with a strained quad, at least he didn’t try to play this weekend and have a set back. Well, there’s other good that can come of it. We can be thankful for our own health. Actually, that’s BS, I’d give my quad to have a healthy Votto. I don’t need my quad to type up my fantasy baseball ‘pertness. I got acumen for days! You know what a smart Indian chef uses? Acumen. Take it, Highlights magazine, it’s yours! Fortch, Votto sounds like he should be back in the minimum fifteen days. Here’s hoping, I got hard-hit singles I need hit! In tangentially related news, Reds manager, Bryan Price, said Jay Bruce would return “very, very soon,” then he was activated from the DL. I’d go as far as saying that was very, very, very soon. Bryan Price added “Very, very soon,” I will buy a thesaurus. That’s a very, very good idea! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Hi there. It’s me – the guy who vouched for Tyler Lyons in his last start, because let’s face it; his matchup (on paper) was prettier than Kelly Kapowski on prom night. Sadly, the outcome of said start turned out to be more like Prom Night the movie, which I never saw because it looked awful, but I imagine it was a blood bath with an awful soundtrack. So yeah, anyone with shares in Lyons (there were a lot) had an awful night, and I got trolled a little (which I love). I’m not sorry though. All I can do is present useful data the best I can and let the cards fall where they may. You just gotta keep on keepin’ on, you know? That being said, if you still can’t forgive me for Lyonsgate, there are other awesome tools here at Razzball like Stream-o-Nator, Hitter-Tron, and the new DFSBot. Wait, did I just call myself an awesome tool? Whatever. As always, we’ve got you covered here, so head on over to DraftKings and use our promo link; it could lead you to $100K and probably a foursome at the bare minimum. Now, let’s put this Lyons nonsense behind us and examine some key participants in tonight’s short slate.

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This is starting to get a little ridiculous now.  It seems as if I can’t even make it through my lunch break without hearing of some catastrophic injury news.  No matter how well teams manage their young hurlers’ inning limits (Jose Fernandez), or how many times we yell to ourselves, “Stop sliding head-first on the base paths!” (Ben Zobrist), the injuries just seem to keep piling up.

Maybe fantasy baseball owners should probably employ a handcuff system similar to the one used in fantasy football.  In fact, come August, there may not even be enough players to fill out major league rosters.  If Will Middlebrooks lands on the DL one more time, Julio Franco may be called upon to play the hot corner for the Red Sox.

Here are this week’s injuries and other health-related situations to monitor…

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In the past, I’ve gone out of my way to focus more on rookie hitters than pitchers, but after last year and living through season-after-season of diminishing offense, this is the world we live in. Before you blame anyone, look in the mirror. What do you see? Besides, the blackheads. You see someone that supported baseball ridding itself of PEDs. So, this is what we have. Pitching up the wazoo. I still contend it should be ‘out the wazoo’ and not ‘up the wazoo,’ but I’m playing by your rules now. I’m no longer sticking it to the man and going up the wazoo. Hmm, that sounded wrong, but never the hoo! Kevin Gausman just barely maintained rookie eligibility by only pitching 47 2/3 IP last year. Really showing a thing or two about not knowing what was coming or going either by having a 5.66 ERA and 1.34 WHIP. It really means nothing. First of all, his xFIP was 3.04, so his ERA shouldn’t have even been that bad. Second of all, he had a 9+ K-rate, which is right in line what you can expect. Third of all, there is no third of all. Why would you think there was a third of all? Gausman isn’t a 5+ ERA pitcher. He could be the best rookie pitcher this year. He has that kind of stuff. With the O’s, you gotta mind your P’s and Q’s. Excuse me, I had Alphabet Soup for lunch and just burped. What I mean is the O’s aren’t in the best division for nurturing along a young starter. You have to be on the top of your game in the AL East. Gausman has the stuff to tame the big offenses. As I’ve tried to beat into your head, a pitcher with great control and strikeout stuff is worth your attention. Gausman is that type of pitcher. The only real question is do the O’s stay with him in the rotation. If today’s game vs. the Tigers is a spot start and back to the minors, it’s not great. Opportunity + Stuff = Fudgie the Whale. Wow, my math is off there. It should’ve equaled “worth a flyer in all fantasy leagues to see if he stays in the rotation.” To give you an idea of this guy’s upside, in Prospect Scott’s top 25 fantasy baseball prospects, the top five are Tanaka, Abreu, Bogaerts, Taijuan and then Gausman. That’s elite company. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Long, long ago, in a realm us mere mortals would know nothing about, there was a secret assemblage of the Elder Gods, for something of vast importance had come to light. An event of this magnitude is the only thing that can force the congregation of the Elders, for you see, the Elders can’t help but bicker between themselves about who’s power is supreme, whose creations are superior, and who has bagged the hottest chicks.

Please, blog, may I have some more?