C.J. Wilson

Grey

Damn Y’all Hudson!

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 253 Comments

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In a Hudson vs. Hudson battle, Tim won on a technicality as Daniel Hudson left the game with what seemed to be a forearm injury.  To add insult to injury, he left the game after giving up 5 ER on 7 hits in 1 2/3 IP.  With a ghastly 7.35 ERA in 45 IP this year, injury or not, it’s time to cut Daniel Hudson from mixed leagues.  He looked primed to build upon a solid 2011 but so did Kate Hudson after Almost Famous.  Let’s just hope Daniel doesn’t wake up to find Alex Rodriguez in his bed, begging him to go blonder and to tone up his arms.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Jason Kubel – 1-for-4 with his 2nd homer in as many games.  Hey, Code Rossi wants back his fantasy outfielder value!  Kubel has 4 homers this week and is hitting .333.  May not be a long-term solution, but I’d give him the ol’ how’s your father?  Even if his last name sounds like a vaginal exercise.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey / Rudy

Phillips Extends Lead Over B. Allen For Top Homering Screwdriver

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 557 Comments

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Brandon Phillips isn’t the shiniest tool in the toolbox, but he hit two homers off Beachy yesterday.  He’s gone from a 30/30 2nd baseman to a 20/20 2nd baseman to now an 18/15 2nd baseman, but that doesn’t mean you’re completely screwed if you overpaid for him on draft day.  As long as Dusty hits him between Votto and Bruce, good ol’ Brandon should deliver above average R/RBI at a solid average.  He might not be as sexy as an Altuve or a Jemile, but he’ll probably be a better value the rest of the way.  BTW, even if you didn’t own him last night, the best thing about BP wrecking another Beachy was we didn’t have to sit through a celebrity telethon and Sean Penn’s sourpuss.  Anyway, here’s what else we saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Psyche!

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

My Average Sank Like A Rock Because Of That Guy Lind

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 212 Comments

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In the preseason, I said Adam Lind could contend for the MVP.  Wow.  It’s almost like Matthew Berry put that thought in my head.  In a litany of dopey things I’ve said, that might take the cake, frost it and smush it into my face.  The Berry feeds the Grey (bad advice), the Berry feeds the Grey (bad advice)… Hi-ho, the marry-o… What was I thinking?!  In my defense, he didn’t have an ailing back when I said that flimflammery and I told you to drop him outright a few weeks ago.  Oh, well, that’s what you get sometimes from crazy predictions.  Just flat-out crazy.  Like I should be walking into traffic in a burlap sack crazy.  So the Jays added a third A to Lind’s first name, sending him to the minors.  Since he was hitting like an infant, it makes sense.  In his place, the Jays called up Yan Gomes.  What’s with people and the last name Gomes unable to spell John?  Yanny was hitting .359 with 5 dingers in Triple-A.  Whatever, right?  Well, he’s a catcher, so those are like MVP (dah!) numbers.  In AL-Only leagues, I could see grabbing him.  Right now, he’s behind J.P., Mathis, Lawrie and Encarnacion, but Lawrie’s got a suspension and Edwin just made an error and the Jays game doesn’t even start for 12 hours, so Yanny could see time all over the field.  Yesterday, he played third and went 2-for-3.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Brett Lawrie – Unable to decide on the shadow coat rack or just bad calls, he dropped his appeal.  He is also practicing counting to ten before blowing his top.  As soon as he figures out what comes after 6 it should be a breeze.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Frank-Frank Leaves Mets Saying Blankety Blank

| 2012 Fantasy Baseball | 568 Comments

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When Heath Bell looked like garbage on Sunday, Frank Francisco returned serve with three of his own runs.  It was like watching a tennis match between Jon Lovitz and that guy from Felicity.  Rather than getting the hook by his manager, Frank-Frank was ejected for arguing balls and strikes.  The ump should’ve told him, “With your stuff, I wouldn’t have the balls to throw strikes either.”  Jon Rauch is next in line here, but, before the ink can dry on his neck, he could lose the job too.  Though, I would grab him, in the non-sexual way.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Ike Davis – Sat out yesterday with flu-like symptoms.  Like.  Oh.  My.  Gahd.  I hopes it’s not Valley Fever.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Pineda They Come, Pineda They Fall

| 2012 Fantasy Baseball | 591 Comments

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The Yankees got bested by the team that gave Adam Jones away in a chump trade.  I mean, yikes with a side of damn.  I could even see adding seven a’s into that damn for good measure.  Michael Pineda is done for the year with a torn labrum, which only sounds like an injury that a female gymnast would get.  Mariners threw him for 340 innings in 2011 and then traded him to the Yankees for their best prospect.  Hey, Yankees, say hello to your mother for me!  Pineda sounds like he’s done for the year.  This is good for teams that drafted him, but had an “Only one Pineda per team” clause.  For all other teams that drafted him this isn’t good news.  Drop him like a hot Pineda.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Ryan Zimmerman – He’s gonna try to hit on Thursday.  I kinda hope it goes badly, and I own him.  Here’s the scenario I see happening if it goes well:  He returns on Friday, reinjures himself and then really needs 15 days from Saturday.  At least if his hitting session goes poorly, the Nats can backdate his DL stint.  Yes, I’m hopeful for a DL stint.  Yes, I’m Googling his address so I can have a “word” with him.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
VinWins

RCL Roundup: April 16

| Our Leagues | 29 Comments

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The first full week brought more reliever injuries, questionable manager decisions, and batting slumps, causing much consternation in the Razzball world. Colby Rasmus took a lot of the vitriol, and was dropped in 10 leagues. He was usually picked up again, though, and started to heat up, finishing with 5 RBI and a stolen base.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

The Drew Storen Called And They’re Running Out Of UCLs

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 197 Comments

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Drew Storen is headed to see Dr. Freeze.  Here’s what I said about three weeks ago, “Drew Storen had arm discomfort… About two weeks ago (so that was about five weeks ago now; this is me adding an addendum — Hey!  Okay, back to the quote).  He hasn’t pitched in a game since March 7th (that’s more than a month ago; okay, maybe I didn’t need to clarify that) and had soreness in his biceps playing catch yesterday (that’s less than a month ago, but more than three weeks ago… Oh, forget.  I’m coming out of this quote.)”  And that’s me coming out of my quote prematurely!  That’s what she said!  Wait, huh?  My guess is Storen will probably be out for a few months.  You don’t go see Dr.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Top 20 Starters for 2012 Fantasy Baseball

| 2012 Fantasy Baseball Draft, 2012 Fantasy Baseball Rankings | 55 Comments

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Well, that took care of the hitters.  They’re done.  That cake is done.  Unless you count Utility-only players, the Hall of Fame committee doesn’t count them, not sure why you do.  Maybe you like players so unathletic that they can’t even play first.  You deal with your own hang-ups, ‘kay?  Now we look at the top 20 starters for 2012 fantasy baseball.  Bee tee dubya, I’m still calling this year twelve after twenty.  Hope you are too, hate to think I started a fad that only lasted for a minute or two right after midnight on January 1st.  We’re gonna take this top 20 to a top 40 then a top 60 then a top 80.  Sounds daunting to you?!  Try being the one writing all this gobbledygook.  I have a pretty off color joke for that last word, but you would’ve had to be in ‘Nam to appreciate it.  You’re not going to find me drafting many of the top tier 20 starters unless they drop to the point where I feel they’re a bargain.  Say two to three rounds past their average draft position.  There’s just too many starters you can grab in the 5th to 7th rounds that are pretty safe to mess with the top, top guys.  I do like to grab at least one starter from the following post, but we’ll get to that.  As with the hitters, the projections are mine and I’ll list where I see tiers starting and stopping.  Anyway, here’s the top 20 starters for 2012 fantasy baseball:

1.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Marlin Payin’s

| 2012 Fantasy Baseball, 2012 Fantasy Baseball Draft | 55 Comments

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And just like with the Wayan Brothers, the Marlins like sequels.  This offseason is a sequel to 1997′s spending spree.  We’ll call this one, “Don’t Be A Miser In South Florida While Drinking Your Profits In The Hood.”  Mark Buehrle signed on with the Marlins for $58 million.  The Marlins are currently acting like they are under the ownership of Montgomery Brewster.  Jeffrey Loria is investing so much, Bernie Madoff probably wishes he was back in the game.  It’s like Loria is investing all the money that Wilpon lost.  Last year Buehrle had his 3rd straight year of a K-rate under 5.  He’s about as bleh as pitchers get.  Anyway, here’s some more moves from the Winter Meetings for 2012 fantasy baseball:

Huston Street – Traded to the Padres for a player to be named later.  I think the PTBNL in the Street deal will be an undocumented worker from a meat processing plant.  Gotta keep Dante Bichette’s Inferno Hot Dog stand stocked up.  No one wants a repeat of the hot dogs with drifter meat from the Larry Walker Ranch.  Assuming Street will be healthy, he’ll be more than suitable as a closer.

Please, blog, may I have some more?