Brian Roberts

Grey / Rudy

Buchholz Finally Putting The Ch Where The TT Had Been

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 233 Comments

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Clay Buchholz went down to Miami and, like most visiting Northeasterns, retired….Marlin batters that is!  While his 7-2 record is due to Nova-esque luck and run support vs. year to date performance (5.00+ ERA), this is his 4th straight start of 7+ IP, 2 ER or less, and 6+ K.  Maybe there’s some truth to that whole “rediscovered his changeup thing” (and can he share it with Lester?).  He’s a must pick up in all leagues for as long as he’s on this roll.  Anyway, here’s what else we saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Brian Roberts – The concusstador is back in style going 3-for-4 hitting leadoff.  Robert Andino can now wait in his shadow and mutter to himself that if his parents named him Jerry, he’d be such a comedy hit that they’d have to start him.  During Roberts’s rehab in Triple-A, he hit around .245 with one homer in 45 ABs and no steals.  If he can stay healthy, I expect about the same from him in the majors.  For the rest of the season, put his stats at nothing/nada/not so good/bleh/more of the same.  If he can get his bleh over .280, his nothing could be better than nothing, but for that he has to stay healthy, which is as likely as me removing my personal mustache groomer from my rider.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Puma Sneaks Away With Torn Meniscus

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 501 Comments

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Lance without an ACL isn’t NE good.  With a torn meniscus, Lance Berkman is only out for six to eight weeks.  “Hello, I’m Keith Morrison of Dateline.  Today’s story is about an aging vet.  A vet that the media began reporting as finished.  Done.  But where this vet saw the end, his knee saw just a setback.  Also, on tonight’s Dateline:  Can you get cancer from playing with your cat?”  Berkman and I haven’t always seen eye to eye.  Last year, he berated me in the comments for not believing in him, then disappeared this year when he wasn’t going well.  I hold no ill feelings towards him.  That competitive edge that drove him to compete also drove him to comment on our site.  Last year, A-Rod missed 6 weeks with a torn meniscus.  I’d put him and Berkman around the same level of gimpiness.  So Lance B.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Top 20 2nd Basemen for 2012 Fantasy Baseball

| 2012 Fantasy Baseball Draft, 2012 Fantasy Baseball Rankings | 71 Comments

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We continue our 2012 fantasy baseball rankings with the top 20 2nd basemen for 2012 fantasy baseball.  There’s no 2nd baseman in the top 10 for 2012 fantasy baseball.  At least by my calculation.  Some ‘perts are putting Cano in the top 10, but I see him just outside of the top 10, but then again 2nd base is packed to the rafters with production.  It looks deeper than the 1st basemen pool and I’m only being half-facetious.  It’s like all 2nd basemen slept at a Holiday Inn last night.  There’s 15 guys I would take and if I had a middle infield spot on my roster, I’d definitely look to put a 2nd baseman in there.  As with the previous ranking lists, tiers and my projections are noted.  Anyway, here’s the top 20 2nd basemen for 2012 fantasy baseball:

1.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Jhinxing Myself

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 222 Comments

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Jhoulys Chacin was walking more yesterday than my grandfather on a treadmill behind a hot number (his words).  Yo-leash’s line 6 2/3 IP, 1 ER, 8 baserunners (6 walks), 7 Ks.  Am I worried that Chacin isn’t going to have a sub-3 ERA all year?  Yeah, of course, I’m worried.  What, am I delusional?  Am I wearing wearing a pirate costume and dictating my blog posts to homeless people behind a Consumer Value Store?  No, of course, I’m not.  I’m behind a Walgreens.  I do not wish to talk about Chacin’s eventual regression.  Yes, I am not using contractions to show how serious I am.  I own Yo-leash all over the place and…Ugh.  We might be at his peak value.  This is sorta like when I told you to sell Matt Joyce a week before he started washing his hands in the urinal and peeing in the sink.  I don’t think Chacin will completely collapse but he’s more of a 3.50-3.75 ERA pitcher.  Trust me, I wish he were going to be this good all year too.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Seth Smith – 3-for-4, 3 RBIs as The Lisper’s Nightmare hit his 7th and 8th home runs.  He’s fine for a fifth outfielder in a deep league, but, man, owning him is the fantasy baseball equivalent to watching paint dry.  Rub Wiggy’s head and get crazy hot for a week once in a while, would ya?

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Jorge’s Elbow Is De La Toasta

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 265 Comments

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Jorge de la Rosa left the third inning because of elbow soreness.  I thought it sounded ominous at the time, but I also thought it might’ve been the older, Hispanic lady riding her bicycle passed my window chanting, “Flores para los muertos.”  It turned out it was a combination of both.  Jorge’s gonna be sleeping with the pisces for a while as he heads off to get Tommy John surgery.  Elsewhere, Rubby de la Rosa was promoted by the Dodgers.  Up and down day for the de la Rosas, apparently.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Carlos Gonzalez – Had a big day in the doubleheader at Coors.  Multiple home runs, RBIs and runs.  A ménage à trois of fantasy goodness.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

The Morales Of The Story Is Celebrate With Modesty

| 2011 Fantasy Baseball Draft | 59 Comments

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Kendrys Morales was so busy running to the DMV to change his name that he will not be ready for the start of the season.  This will give Mark Trumbo an opportunity to get some April at-bats.  You say ho-hum, I say ho-hmm.  Did you see what I did there?  DID YOU!?  Yeah, I’m not sure either.  Trumbo hit 36 home runs in 139 Triple-A games last year.  Sure, that was in the PCL which is like hitting on the moon with an aluminum bat.  Still, 36 homers is nothing to sneeze at unless you’re allergic to power, upside rookies.  In most mixed leagues, Trumbo’s not worth stashing.  But in deeper leagues, I’d absolutely take a flyer that Kendrys has a few more setbacks.  I mean, it’s already taken him way too long to recover.  Who knows?  Maybe Trumbo will Pipp Kendry and mash his way into a regular job.  BTW, with the switch from Kendry to Kendrys, it seems like the “s” that Alexis Rios dropped when he switched to Alex has finally appeared.  Be interesting to see where the “i” shows up at.  I’m guessing there’s going to be a new San Fran outfielder, Cody Rossi.  Anyway, here’s what else is going on in fantasy baseball:

Scott Downs – Broke his toe.  Downs goes… Um, Downs.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Joey Homerandribbieani

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 46 Comments

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Yesterday, Joey Votto went 2-for-4 with his 34th homer and 14th steal.  Tomorrow, the MVP.  He didn’t have the biggest offensive day for all hitters yesterday, but he’s getting the lead today.  Wanna know why?  Cause I’ve been shot by Cupid and I love Joey Votto.  True story, I walked into an ice cream parlor and asked for a Joey Votto.  The guy behind the counter said, “I don’t know what you mean.”  I punched him in his mouth.  Here’s what I said last December, “If Votto continues to progress, you’re looking at a guy that could easily give you 32 homers, 10 steals and a .300 average.  Want more?  If you buy into Joey Votto for 2010, I’ll also throw in a climbing walk rate and OPS for absolutely free!  Don’t want it?  Who cares, it’s free!”  And that’s me quoting me!  Finally, know who I’m probably not going to be able to afford in 2011 drafts?  Votto, my love!  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Jay Bruce – 3-for-4, 2 Runs, 4 RBIs and 2 homers as he lives up to his Septacular reputation.  Last September, he hit 4 homers and .353 in only 34 ABs after not hitting above .258 in any other month.  Had 7 homers in September of 2008.  Play Bruce in the Venezuelan Winter League and he’ll win an MVP.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

You Can’t Spell K-Rod Without KO

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 185 Comments

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Francisco Rodriguez was arrested for assaulting his father-in-law.  That’s going to make for awkward holidays.  Or maybe they’ll skip Christmas and celebrate Boxing Day.  Fred Wilpon needs to put some rubber bands in his beard and get K-Rod and Tony “Shirtless” Bernazard into the squared circle.  During the fight, Johan was seen comforting K-Rod’s wife.  Johan, “She was looking for the changeup, and I went with the heater.”  K-Rod will probably miss a few games while he responds to attorney emails.  Oddly enough, K-Rod isn’t the easiest guy to handcuff.  His backups in no particular order:  Bobby Parnell, who I believe is the little black kid from Role Models, isn’t very good, Manny Acosta isn’t much better, Elmer Dessens is the guy who sells fresh corn on the side of the road when you’re driving through a rural town and Pedro Feliciano is related to Pedro Feliz, I think.  Frankly, I’d avoid the whole Mets mess.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Miguel Montero – Was a part of a back-to-back-to-back-to-back homer job with Adam LaRoche, Mini Donkey and Stephen Drew as they did work on Bush.  Hey, Googlers of back-to-back + Bush.  Betcha this isn’t the kind of fantasy site you were looking for, was it?  And for those that found us by Googling Donkey + Bush –> I’m kinda skeeved.

Please, blog, may I have some more?