Bobby Jenks

Grey

Brewers Fix What Ales Them

| 2011 Fantasy Baseball Draft | 34 Comments

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The peasant Royals decided to send their big bargaining chip for three chips and a chip to be named later.  This comes just days after Dayton Moore said Zack Greinke wasn’t happy and the Royals were going to trade him.  This is like Ted Hughes saying Sylvia Plath wasn’t happy so he was going to cheat on her.  (That was for our three girl readers and the guys who took Feminist Literature to try to get laid.  “I’m going to take Feminist Literature because it’s going to be just me and a bunch of chicks!”  Three months later, “The class is just me and chicks that hate me.”)  In 126 1/3 IP in interleague play, Greinke had a record of 10-6/4.42/1.24/112.  That includes some young years when Greinke was manhandled by depression like CT manhandled Johnny Bananas in The Gulag, it includes NL teams in AL parks and it includes some relief work.  I think he’ll be better on the Brewers.  He’s a better pitcher now.  I wouldn’t necessarily expect another automatic Cy Young year.  Let’s face it, that was a year for the ages for Greinke.  He will have a better offense and he won’t have to carry the entire starting pitching staff, which I imagine could be a drag if you don’t have the mental stamina.  After last year, Greinke was wavering between a fantasy #1 and #2.  Now there’s some shine back on him.  I’d expect a 3.50 to 3.75 ERA with a solid WHIP and Ks.  I’d have no qualms about drafting him as my first fantasy starter.  Anyway, here’s some more moves and what they mean for fantasy baseball:

Alcides Escobar – Traded to the Royals.  Doesn’t really change his value, he just needs to run.  Alcides was actually going to get a sleeper post today before this trade went down.  Now he’s getting a sleeper post tomorrow.  Stay tuned!  Or don’t!  These are your choices.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

A-Gon Baby Gone

| 2011 Fantasy Baseball Draft | 81 Comments

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The Padres finally put their offense on the offensive.  Only here the offensive definition is “causing anger, displeasure or resentment.”  Thanks, Merriam-Webster!  Adrian Gonzalez gets a small boost in value, if ‘small’ meant ‘could there be a better place for him to play?’  You don’t have to be a rocket scientist who gave up his job at JPL to study baseball stats to see the difference between Petco and Fenway.  In Fenway, there’s a giant freakin’ wall 310 feet down the line.  In Petco, there’s a memorial park in left field with a giant Nate Colbert statue that no one’s ever reached.  Wait, that was Kyle Blanks.  Last year, Fenway was 7th for most offense.  Petco was 26th.  I think A-Gon’s Home/Away splits over the last three years say all you need to know.  In 832 home ABs, 112/37/127/.257.  In 927 away ABs, 168/70/192/.310.  Yes, A-Gon can win the MVP in Boston.  I’m not going to belabor (any further) this point.  It’s a huge boon for A-Gon’s value if boon means what I think it does.  Youuuuk gets a small boost in value too now that he’ll be playing 3rd base, eligibility he was about to lose going into 2011.  Anyway, here’s some more recent moves and what they mean for fantasy baseball:

Casey Kelly – The prized piece in the A-Gon trade.  Stephen already went over his Casey Kelly fantasy.  Now that he gets to (eventually) pitch in Petco, his value bumps up, but he still looks at least a year away, if not more.  There’s probably at least three dozen prospects worth looking at before him in dynasty leagues.  There’s a few pitchers in the Padres system alone that are more interesting, in the short term at least.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

HR Still Not Filling The Job

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 32 Comments

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Oh, Hanley Ramirez is Hanley Ramirez, and a guy that will play a bit bruised giving it his all is a guy that will play a bit bruised giving it his all, and never the twain shall meet.  (I think a “twain” is a train as pronounced by Elmer Fudd.  Don’t quote me on that though.  It could be referring to Shania.  My Google’s broke so I’m shooting from the hip.)  Hanley playing with Pujols’ level of dedication is probably the best shortstop anyone has ever seen.  Hanley as he is now is probably Andruw Jones in five years.  As I’ve said before about Manny, insouciance doesn’t age well.  Hanley hasn’t played since last Wednesday, but for now he’s listed as day-to-day.  Half of me says hold out hope for Hanley to return ASAP.  The other half of me says he has 2 homers and 4 steals this month.  You can probably find that production elsewhere in the last two weeks.  Since Hanley is undroppable in most formats, it’s all probably moot.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Chris Volstad – 9 IP, 0 ER, 7 baserunners, 3 Ks as he handily beat Carpenter (6 IP, 4 ER, 7 baserunners, 6 Ks) and the Cardinals.  I’ll tell ya what, when the Cards fold, they don’t play.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Leyland Better Start Bringing An Extra Pack Of Smokes

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 44 Comments

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Ryan Perry got the save yesterday because Jose Valverde is out with a tender elbow.  Valverde isn’t supposed to be out long but whenever a reliever’s elbow is in question — or any pitcher, for that matter — it’s cause for concern.  With the Tigers playing for nothing, they could shut Valverde down.  Phil Coke could see some situational saves.  When reached for comment about his new role, Phil Coke said, “This is it?”  By the way, he’s the best lefty reliever synonymous with Coke since Steve Howe.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Johnny Damon – 4-for-4, 2 Runs and an RBI.  Not a bad day to stream him into my lineup.  Hit the wall, turn on the lights, blow on my fist, rub fist on leather jacket and say, “Ayyyyyy.”  (Wasn’t as great a day to stream Casper Wells or Don Kelly, who’s also known as LL Donkey.)

Rick Porcello – 8 IP, 3 ER, 4 baserunners, 3 K.  It’s legitimately hard for me to give a non-hedged endorsement to Porcello.  I don’t like his lack of Ks, but at this stage in the year, all’s fair in love and the waiver wire.  Porcello’s pitching well and gets the Royals in his start after next.  His next start vs.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Closer Look

| Closers | 108 Comments

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In September, closers either mean everything or they mean nothing.  You either really need closers to catch the next nearest guy in saves or you have too much ground to make up and you’re secure in your standings.  If you fall into the former category, I’d grab anyone I could to get saves.  Hello, Juan Gutierrez, would you like to dance?  If you fall into the latter category, you can either start dropping brain freezes –  Joel Hanarahananananan, we had a terrible time together and now I will drop you.  Goodbye.  –  or just bench your lower tier closers to avoid getting Kazaam’d.  I’d only drop a closer if I knew no one could catch me in saves or if it were strategic.  For instance, I’ve been known to drop a closer because I know the guy with the high waiver claim can get him and catch the guy in front of him in saves, which will help me in the overall standings.  Anyway, here’s all of the closers for your fantasy baseball team, as of right now:

$12 Salads

You know that restaurant your girlfriend/wife/what-have-you likes to go to that charges, like, $12 for a salad?

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Sh*t, Happ Wins

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 46 Comments

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J.A. Happ went the distance yesterday, throwing a shutout with 3 baserunners and 4 Ks.  Somewhere, Ed Wade’s Toupee smiled.  Now Happ has almost a month of quality starts.  So all’s good under the Happ hood, eh?  Eh, indeed.  Or more like crapp.  Something’s not copacetic when a guy has 32 walks against 41 Ks.  His xFIP says he’s a devil’s uncle.  If a devil’s uncle means Happ has gone lucky.  His team’s been better in the 2nd half, but they’re still the Astros.  And all of those reasons are why I’m short of Happ-y on J.A.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Dan Uggla – Strained right groin knocked him out of the lineup yesterday.  His left groin said the right groin was always ‘acting pissy.’

Brett Cecil – 7 IP, 2 ER, 6 baserunners, 5 Ks, but gave up 3 more unearned runs for the ticker shock.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Dude, That’s Some Really Nice Bud

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 126 Comments

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Hello, new readers.  No, this isn’t High Times dot com, but don’t worry there’s Doritos at the end of this post.  Hey, don’t skip ahead.  You have to read the post first.  Yes, the computer is talking to you.  Aw, I’m just messing with you.  The computer’s not talking to you.  You’re just reading, silly!  So, Bud Norris didn’t come out of nowhere to be my new Razzpick du jour.  Yesterday, he went six innings, giving up one run and K’d 4.  In the not-too-decent past, I mentioned liking his upside.  For our friends in Latin America, the caveat is his wildness.  The love comes from the fact he has more Ks than innings.  There’s only ten other starters with more than 110 innings in the major leagues that can claim that.  That’s one starter for every finger.  Unless Antonio Alfonseca is reading this.  The wildness is still there, but he hasn’t walked more than 3 batters in a game since April.  I’d absolutely grab Norris for the last month if I needed Ks (who doesn’t?) and some upside (of course you do).  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Chris Johnson – 4-for-6, 1 RBI in a 16th inning game that saw Roy Oswalt play left field and Tim Kurkjian’s voice cracking at the sheer craziness of the game.  Can you believe this game, fellas?!

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Chipper Gives Fans One Last Injury To Remember Him By

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 72 Comments

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Ted Williams hit a HR in his last AB.  John Elway won his 2nd straight Super Bowl in his last start.  Chipper Jones eschewed a standing ovation in favor of a reclining operation.  Sometimes you don’t appreciate greatness until it hits the DL.  In between all the injuries, Chipper Jones has had one of the top 5 careers for a 3rd basemen in WAR (behind only Schmidt, Eddie Mathews, Boggs and Brett).  Fairly well, Glass Chipper, keep your feet on the ground and keep reaching for the stars while trying not to pull any ligaments.  Omar Infante should now play every day for the rest of the year even after Prado returns.  He’s a solid average contributor and… Well… Uh…  Yeah, average.  That’s it.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Freddie Freeman – Frank Wren says the injury to Chipper doesn’t change Freeman’s timetable.  Glaus’ inability to hit anything other than weak grounders to the shortstop could change that timetable though.  Right now, I don’t think we see Freeman until September.  Stay tuned!  Or not.  Your choice.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey / Rudy

Picking Up This Minor Is Statutory

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 83 Comments

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Almost a 11 K/9 in the minors is, uh, Mike Minor.  He major, Kanye.  I hope Roberto Kelly doesn’t come back to visit the Braves because when R. Kelly sees a minor, urine trouble!  So should you play some Gary Glitter if you’re lusting after this Minor?  In 118 2/3 IP this year, he has 144 Ks and 44 walks.  Hello, beautiful.  Want me to continue?  Of course you do.  You’re greedy.  In Triple-A through five starts, his ERA is 1.99 while rocking a .171 BAA.  He probably only has around 7 starts left in his arm this year before the Braves shut him down, but that’s all right, no one has many starts left.  Minor’s a must grab in NL-Only and keepers.  In mixed leagues, I’d grab him for his first start vs.

Please, blog, may I have some more?