Billy Wagner

Grey

Top 20 Closers, 2010 Fantasy Baseball

| 2010 Fantasy Baseball Rankings | 71 Comments

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With the the top 20 closers for 2010 fantasy baseball, we’ve finished our recap of the 2010 fantasy baseball rankings.  Some will feel like it came too soon, others will think let’s get 2011 under way already!  Whichever camp you fall in, don’t eat cherimoya seeds, they are poisonous.  This is our final look back.  This is still a look back.  It is not how I’d rank them for 2011 aka next year.  As with the other rankings, the final rankings come from ESPN’s Player Rater.  I did this so I could objectively critique MY preseason rankings to THEIRS.  Their rankings for closers weigh wins when I’d just want saves, but whatevs.  At least it’s unbiased.  Anyway, here’s the top 20 closers for 2010 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:

1.

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Grey

Closer Look

| Closers | 108 Comments

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In September, closers either mean everything or they mean nothing.  You either really need closers to catch the next nearest guy in saves or you have too much ground to make up and you’re secure in your standings.  If you fall into the former category, I’d grab anyone I could to get saves.  Hello, Juan Gutierrez, would you like to dance?  If you fall into the latter category, you can either start dropping brain freezes –  Joel Hanarahananananan, we had a terrible time together and now I will drop you.  Goodbye.  –  or just bench your lower tier closers to avoid getting Kazaam’d.  I’d only drop a closer if I knew no one could catch me in saves or if it were strategic.  For instance, I’ve been known to drop a closer because I know the guy with the high waiver claim can get him and catch the guy in front of him in saves, which will help me in the overall standings.  Anyway, here’s all of the closers for your fantasy baseball team, as of right now:

$12 Salads

You know that restaurant your girlfriend/wife/what-have-you likes to go to that charges, like, $12 for a salad?

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Closer Look

| Closers | 144 Comments

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Matt Capps got traded and kept his job, Rauch didn’t get traded and lost his job, Octavio Dotel got traded and lost his job, Brian Wilson didn’t get traded but is moping because his shoes are no longer shiny.  It’s the bullpens, ya’ll.  Just yesterday Lindstrom was out with a sore back that he hurt when he tried to get the A’s replacement closer in his fantasy league.  That’s a true story in opposite world.  On the top of the rankings, Wagner made himself a $12 Salad.  On the bottom of the rankings, I wanted to move Chris Perez into the Donkeycorns, but he needs more time in the role first.  He’ll be a Donkeycorn by September.  Mark my words!  But don’t mark them on your computer, that doesn’t come off.  Anyway, here’s all of the closers for your fantasy baseball team, as of right now:

$12 Salads

You know that restaurant your girlfriend/wife/what-have-you likes to go to that charges, like, $12 for a salad?

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Closer Look

| Closers | 171 Comments

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For the first time in over two years, Jonathan Papelbon is no longer a $12 Salad.  I know, call your Congressman.  Pass Prop 12.  There’s been signs for a long time that he wasn’t the same closer from 2007.  I didn’t want to move him because he seemed like the epitome of a $12 Salad.  Overpriced lettuce?

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

The Hurt Foot Locker

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 113 Comments

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If there’s one guy who can’t afford to lose a foot, it’s the five-three Dustin Pedroia.  As of post time, it’s not clear how long Pedroia will be out with his fractured foot.  My guess is 4 to 6 weeks.  One thing Scrappy Doo does is fight.  It’s a wonder he can carry around the over-sized baboon heart he’s got.  One thing Scrappy Doo doesn’t do (say that fast 117 times) is sit on the sidelines, but to paraphrase the Christian Slater/Marisa Tomei classic, Untamed Heart, “You love with your mind and soul, not your heart.  But you don’t hit with your mind and soul when you have a fractured foot.”  So while Dusty’s shelved, you need to find a replacement.  Some ways you can look for average?  Aviles or Kendrick.  Steals?  Figgy or Theriot.  RBIs?  Barmes or Guillen.  Runs?  Walker or Polanco.  All of these options depend on your league depth, obviously.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Clay Buchholz – Hyperextended his knee on Saturday, but the word on Lansdowne Street is he will avoid the DL and shouldn’t miss more than one start, even if that.  Good news indeed, he’s Clay aching but he should be back to filling your fantasy gloryhole soon.

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Grey

Bumerooski For Tulowristy

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 99 Comments

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In case you were on a three day bender with Michael Madsen, Troy Tulowitzki will miss up to 8 weeks with a broken wrist.  It’s old news by now, but sometimes you just wanna know what Grey has to say.  Hey, hey, hey.  Wrists are tricky things for hitters.  I wouldn’t be surprised if Tulo returns in August and doesn’t start hitting well until September.  If you own him, there’s nothing you can do but sit on him.  Not literally, unless you have his permission.  I wouldn’t trade for him, unless it’s a keeper and you’re rebuilding for next year and can get him for cheap now that he’s out.  The Rockies called up Chris Nelson, but he just looks like infielder depth while SS and 2nd base get manned by Clint Barmes and Jonathan Herrera, who sounds like a fashion designer, so if you hear someone say, “Nice glove work by Jonathan Herrera!”  You tell them it’s a knockoff.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Manny Corpas – 0 IP, 5 ER.  Corpas Christi!  The last two days this guy left my ratios looking like a Port Authority toilet.  Huston Street gets activated on Tuesday, but Tracy says he’s going to ease Street back into role.  Since I own Corpas and not Street on several teams, I’m not sure if I want Street to become the closer sooner or later.  Also, for Street owners, if Tracy doesn’t get Street back into the role in short order, he may end up injured again before recording a save.  Cust kayin’.

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Grey

Closer Look

| Closers | 184 Comments

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The Brain Freezes lived up to their names last month.  With Jenks, Hoffman, Gregg, Dotel, Lidge, Funklin Morales, Qualls, Perez, Wood and Simon all putting dry ice on your fantasy baseball team and then shattering it.  No one ever said owning Brain Freezes would be easy, but does it have to be this hard?  Can’t I just Ron Popeil my Jenkses and Hoffmen and let them be?  No, of course, I can’t.  It would be too easy.  I come from the school that if a guy has a chance to earn even one save, I’ll own them.  Sometimes this yields 6 saves from Alfredo Simon, other times this yields 12 earned runs in a third of an inning from Will Ohman.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Closer Look

| 2010 Fantasy Baseball Draft | 151 Comments

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Joe Nathan and Huston Street are gone and everyone moved up.  That’s why people like Matt Capps and Chris Perez have done little but squat on the john yet moved up the rankings.  Though I still managed to find a way to not move up Brian Fuentes.  The way we’re going there won’t be any $12 Salads by May.  Then what?  $8 Side Dishes?  Who needs roasted cauliflower with truffle oil?  Not me!  I’m happy with a baked potato.  Yes, sir!  Hmm… Maybe I shouldn’t write these right before lunch.  Anyway, here’s all of the closers for your fantasy baseball team, as of right now:

$12 Salads

You know that restaurant your girlfriend/wife/what-have-you likes to go to that charges, like, $12 for a salad?

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Closer Look

| 2010 Fantasy Baseball Draft | 120 Comments

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The murmurs of Heath Bell getting traded to another team by July are getting louder.  (BTW, I love the word murmurs.  I really wanted the survivors on Lost to call The Others, The Murmurs.  Wouldn’t that have been awesome?!  Okay, maybe me.)  Prepare for a dozen or so posts titled, “For Whom the Bell Tolls,” at some of our weak sister sites.  And by “weak sister,” I’m talking prison slang and I mean ESPN.  I moved Bell down one whole spot.  I’m not worried in March about someone who might get traded in July.  He will probably drop one or two spots each month until July.  If you get 23 saves, a 1.69 ERA, 1.08 WHIP, 42 Ks in 37 1/3 innings pre-All-Star Break, you’ll be mad you drafted him?  Bee tee dubya, those were his 1st half numbers last year.  Then who knows where he goes.  Maybe Lidge and Madson finally give Manuel a coronary and Bell takes over the closing duties in Philly as Victorino player-manages.  Or maybe Bell goes somewhere else.  You get the picture; it’s still early.  Don’t overestimate-slash-overthink-slash-overrate… Just don’t “over” anything.  Anyway, here’s all of the closers for your fantasy baseball team, as of right now:

$12 Salads

You know that restaurant your girlfriend/wife/what-have-you likes to go to that charges, like, $12 for a salad?

Please, blog, may I have some more?