No, there’s probably no cast in Andre’s future. I’m not even sure they make casts small enough for the pinkie finger. That was Pingping‘s downfall, that and the chain smoking. After Andre Ethier broke a bone in his pinkie, he said something was seriously wrong. Seriously? You got a boo-boo on your pinkie! What, you can’t make shadow animals now? When he found out what it was, he said that it’s the leverage point of his swing and it would prevent him from holding the bat the way he normally does. Who’s leverage point is their freakin’ pinkie?! This is like the pea under the princess’s mattress. His biggest concern is probably how he can stick his pinkie out while drinking tea. Ethier could be out for a few weeks or he can play through it. So he’s damned if he does or a half dozen of the other… Or however that cliché goes. If it is his leverage point, you don’t want him playing through it. If he doesn’t play through it, he could be out at least a few weeks. And here I thought the only time Ethier and the word pinkie would be associated would be from this picture. Draw your own conclusions, but I’m guessing he’s in Key West. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:
Chad Billingsley – 7 1/3 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners, 6 Ks. What every pitcher needs, a trip to Petco. Please, blog, may I have some more?
AJ Hinch said, “Conor Jackson screams two-hole to me right now.” That’s what Mexican food does to me. Speaking of Mexican food, Conor Jackson is in a good position for runs, hitting in front of J-Upside, LaCucaracha, and Mini Donkey. That’s also a good spot for LaRoche, assuming the D-Backs aren’t facing a lefty and it’s after the All-Star Break. I tease. Who knows, maybe LaRoche will get his act together, hit well the whole year and be a decent sleeper in the end rounds at your corner infidel spot. Both Jackson and LaRoche are being drafted right now like they don’t even exist and, well, that feels wrong. Anyway, here’s some more fantasy baseball news:
Andrew Bailey – Out for a week with tennis elbow. No word exactly what caused it, but we’re guessing it’s from all the pressure on his serving when playing with his doubles’ partner, Brad Ziegler. Stop with your underhand serve! Wuertz hasn’t pitched yet in the spring, Waking Joey Devine is Walking Wounded Joey Devine until he sees game action, so that leaves Ziegler. Here’s my IM exchange with Rudy about picking up Ziegler. Me, “I’m grabbing Ziegler.” Rudy, “Forget it, Grey, it’s Oaktown.” He was right; I forgot it. Bailey could still be ready to start the season, so this isn’t an immediate add, but, as I’ve been saying in the offseason, Bailey’s not that safe. This could be a bullpen by committee by May 1st and Ziegler’s probably the third man on the totem pole. Hard to say right now with so many injuries. If this were in the middle of the season, I would’ve grabbed Ziegler. Please, blog, may I have some more?
With 2 HRs yesterday, Adam Lind now has 36/11/43/.313 on the year. I know, Cody Ross has looked good for stretches. Even Aaron Rowand has had a week or two here and there. But why are people asking me if Adam Lind should be sold off or worse dropped? You don’t want 85/27/100/.285? I know he was as boring as dog balls for the month of May. Well, he’s batting near-.500 in June. He’s shoved into the middle of the Blue Jays lineup like a Jenga piece no one will touch. Heart. Please, blog, may I have some more?
The Orioles love their ex-Cubbies so they decided to sample some of their Pecan’t Pie rather than just hand the LF job to Nolan Reimold. As with most of these rookies, a lot depends on starting jobs. And Reimold doesn’t have one. Yet. So who’s blocking Reimold? Luke Scott? Who are you, Luke Scott? A 30-something prospect? Luke Scott must’ve called Matt Stairs for advice on how to prolong a major league career that should’ve ended years ago. Go to the DL, Luke. (He’s not there yet, but maybe if we all hold our breath. What Razzballers want, Razzballers get!) Then there’s Felix Pee-ay, who is crap-ay. He was hurt in yesterday’s game. Not to mention, many think his ship has already come and gone for prospect status. If Reimold emerges from this O’s left fielder mess, he’s a slugger who we think could hit for power without costing you too much in the average department. The nice thing about Reimold compared to a rookie pitcher — say, I don’t know, Hochevar! Please, blog, may I have some more?
If you drafted Manny this year, then you better make a new plan, Stan because Man-Ram is getting time off for bad behavior. 50 games to be exact. The reason – he came up positive for human chorionic gonadotropin, or HCG, which can be used to boost testosterone levels. Manny seems to be claiming his doctor prescribed it for erectile dysfunction but the drug is most often prescribed for…women’s fertility. Huh? And here we thought Alyssa Milano was the only person in the LA Dodger clubhouse taking those. Maybe Manny got screwed by a bad boner doctor but our money is on Scott Boras. He probably gave those pills to Manny, told him they were Flintstone vitamins, and Manny hallucinated Flintstone faces onto the vitamins. Please, blog, may I have some more?
As Stephen Drew tried to take that step forward in 2009 that fantasy baseball owners craved, he hurt his hamstring. Wonder what a Drew family vacation is like… “J.D., you wanna go see the world’s largest bottle cap? It’s supposedly 17 inches in circumference!” “Sure, I’ll go tell Mom and Pop.” On the way to the Sequoia, two hamstring pulls, a fractured hip and the Mom needs Tommy John surgery. Pretty sure no one’s giving them joint family coverage. The MDs in AZ say Drew’s injury shouldn’t knock him out longer than the 15 days. When you consider he hadn’t even started to hit yet, looks like Drew’ll begin his season mid-May. All in all, this is a decent buy low guy right now. If you can trade some spare parts for him (closer-du-jour, extra OF, etc.), he should prove worth stashing. He’s still talented and he can have a solid three-quarters of a season. Hopefully, he spent the first quarter on someone else’s team. Anyway, here’s what else we saw yesterday for fantasy baseball:
Brandon Webb – Earliest return date is late-May. Still a long season so you can’t really sell him short, but with the trouble coming in his right shoulder, I’d be worried this doesn’t become a worst situation before it gets better. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Robinson Cano? Please tell me you’re not going to suggest we buy into Robinson Cano? Please, Grey, I was beginning to find you halfway intelligent. Sorry, random italicized voice, I’m a glutton for punishment. Someone has a terrific season the previous year (Pedroia) and I pull back. A player craps the bed in the previous season (Robinson Cano) and I get excited about them. Please, blog, may I have some more?
I wrote this blurb about Daisuke Matsuzaka, then ran it through an online Japanese translator then converted it back to English. Here’s what came out — “Dice-K’s arm fell asleep! You wish he was going to recover like Tom Cruise in The Last Samurai after he found humility. Please, blog, may I have some more?
After I posted the top 40 starters for 2009 fantasy baseball, there was a public outcry in the comments. Where is so and so?! It was as if I butchered their bunny rabbit like the Roger and Me lady. No one’s butchering your bunny rabbit, friend. Your bunny rabbit’s fine. Unfortunately, I don’t think your bunny rabbit’s a top 40 starter. Your bunny rabbit, friend, is a top 60 starter. How’s dem carrots? BTW, while the 2009 fantasy baseball rankings are the gospel, they aren’t set in stone. I update them occasionally. Anyway, here’s the top 60 starters for 2009 fantasy baseball:
41. Please, blog, may I have some more?
If you do like moi (That’s French. Face it, I’m cultured like yogurt.), you’ll avoid top level starters at your 2009 fantasy baseball draft and you’ll try to find value later on. Hey, I really like Roy Oswalt! And I like Wandy Rodriguez, what’s it to ya, random italicized voice? Last season, Wandy Rodriguez finally put together a season that hinted at his respectable minor league numbers and suggested he might be someone to look at late. To stick with the French theme, let’s take out a scalpel and dissect this frog. So could Wandy Rodriguez be a 2009 fantasy sleeper? Please, blog, may I have some more?