The top 60 outfielders for 2013 fantasy baseball become a sloppy mess towards the end. I almost went with guys like Leonys Martin over, say, Angel Pagan, but that’s upside for upside’s sake over a known entity. Guys near the top of the 80 outfielder post, which will be up next, like Adam Eaton and Leonys Martin are great, but I can’t rank them above guys who have shown 10-15 homer and 20-30 steal skills in the majors, even though I could see owning Eaton or Martin before Pagan. I’ll just wait until Pagan is drafted by someone else and then lay my big, beautiful, blue eyes on upside outfielders. With these outfielders, we’re officially in a crop of players (or maybe that’s crap) that won’t even be drafted in some shallower leagues. If you have only 3 outfielders in your 10-team league, you might never see Michael Brantley drafted. In deeper leagues, where these guys will be drafted, you need to match up needs with wants. I want Ben Revere if I have heavy RBI/power guys on my team. I don’t need him if I have, say, Reyes, Aoki and Ichiro. Oh, and if I had Reyes, Aoki and Ichiro, I might consider fantasy rugby. All of the 2013 fantasy baseball rankings are there. As always, my projections and tiers are included. Anyway, here’s the top 60 outfielders for 2013 fantasy baseball:

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The Yankees’ extra-bat-off-the-bench in the playoffs, Alex Rodriguez, will be out for six months, following surgery on his hip that is set to take place in January. Guess A-Rod doesn’t want to be out of service for the holiday season. “Hey, I got a date with this smoking hot, butchy female and she wants me to dress up as Santa and sit on my lap. Can we do this whole hip-ma-whosie Jan one?” That’s A-Rod talking to his doctors. Yes, A-Rod says Jan instead of January. BTW, I Googled A-Rod surgery and the first article was at Latino dot Fox. A-Rod is as Latino as Taco Bell. On the fo’ really tip, why can’t he go into surgery right now? He’s getting paid approximately four hundred million this year and he wants to delay surgery so he misses an extra month of the season? The $17 million that went to Russell Martin just shook its head, incredulous. If there’s a legitimate reason for the delay that I didn’t read about, there’s no legitimate reason, so don’t bother telling me about it. Maybe if Pasta Diving Cap’n Jetes would get hip surgery in December than A-Rod would, as well. Well, even before Rodriguez came down with the appropriate hip problem, he shouldn’t have been drafted. He’s actually done us all a favor. Now he’s pushed himself so far down draft boards that you won’t even have to think about it in, say, the 12th round. For 2013, I’ll put his line at 40/13/44/.263/6 in 300 ABs. He’s firmly in the “Do Not Touch” section of your draft board. Anyway, here’s some more offseason moves for 2013 fantasy baseball:

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R.A. Dickey went seven and a third innings with no runs and eight Ks as he dueled Wang.  Dickey vs. Wang was the greatest sword fight since Steven Seagal and Jean-Claude Van Damme both arrived at the same tanning salon in the late 80′s.  In this game, surprisingly there weren’t that many dribblers through the vas deferns.  Streamers would have to wait until later in the day with Leake.  The game started with the Nats putting a giant zipper in the outfield for each pitcher’s entrance.  Then the knuckleballs came early and often and showed a polished Dickey.

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Andy Pettitte managed to shut out the Rays yesterday for 7 1/3 IP with only 4 baserunners and 10 Ks.  No wonder why he returned.  He was probably sick of beating his kids at MLB 2K12.  “Dad, we don’t mind you playing our video games while we’re at school, but could you stop spitting tobacco onto our all-terrain robot?”  That’s Andy’s kids after a powwow about how to address the problem.  I’ll be the first to admit I didn’t see this coming.  He wasn’t even that good before he retired.  I guess he just needed 26 months between starts.  If he retired again tomorrow, he’d throw a no-hitter in 2016.  Or he’d win that perfect game contest that MLB is doing with their video game.  Enough with the commercials already.  I liked baseball better when they were a conservative game without the cheap gimmicks.  Bring back the Spiderman web-covered bases!  So, can Pettitte keep this up?  Seems doubtful.  He’s about a 3.75 ERA guy that pitches his home games in not one of the more forgiving parks in a tough division.  But, you know what, he looks no worse than what I’d expect of Oswalt and you’re stashing him, so he’s definitely worth owning.  Anyway, here’s what else we saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Psyche!  Before we get into today’s roundup, wanted to draw attention to the contest we’re holding.  We’re giving away a fifty-five inch LG 3D TV.  The TV comes with a remote control that has a mustache glued on top of it.  I’m kidding.  The mustache is glued on top of the TV.  Go ahead and enter.  It’s free and there’s a chance your significant other might be less inclined to get annoyed with you when you check your teams on a romantic date if you just won a TV.  Anyway II, here’s the roundup:

Colby Rasmus – Watch out Mr.

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