Fantasy Baseball Advice

I listened to Lisa Loeb’s “Stay” while considering the relevance of the Manny trade, then I thought, “Why on earth am I listening to Lisa Loeb?” Rather than viewing this trade like it’s the end of an era, Red Sox fans seem to be viewing this trade like it’s the end of an error. Sure, Manny was a handful, but he gave you a lot more than 500+ career home runs and career average over .310. He gave you something sorely missing in today’s game — flavor. The irony is the Sox got back a player who makes white bread seem like a bold choice for a sandwich. Am I the only one who sees the Red Sox and thinks, “Ellsbury, JD Drew, Bay, Youuuuuuk, Lowell, Beckett, Varitek… Did Jerry Remy suddenly become the only one besides Big Papi with any character?” It’s bad enough everywhere you turn it’s Subway, McDonald’s, Starbucks, Supercuts, Kinko’s, rinse and repeat. Now all our sports stars must be deviod of personality, too. What were you thinking as the seconds ticked down and it was official that you were the champions? First, I want to thank God. Without him, none of this is possible. Next, I wanna point out what a great job Coach did. He took us from last to first in three years. Next, I gotta point out what a great job all of my teammates did. They made me better. Finally, it’s thanks to these fans! You’re the best in the world! If that’s not bucking fullshit, I’ve never heard it. So when the Sox fans say good riddance to Manny, I say they’re all brainwashed by corporate America (and I lower cased corporate on purpose. As it should be.).

Since this is a fantasy baseball blog, first and foremost, I’ll go over the value changes for the Manny trade. Manny might get a slight hit on his value because he’ll no longer have The Green Mawnster to knock balls off of, but Manny’s a hitting savant and I expect him to make the proper adjustments. Also, this trade could be the kind of motivation Manny hasn’t had in almost four years. This does hurt a few other peripheral pieces in SoCal. Let’s do a basic math problem. If the Dodgers play 6 games a week and they have three outfielders, that means they have 18 possible outfield games. Now those 18 games need to be split between 5 outfielders (Ethier, Jones, Kemp, Pierre and Ramirez). So Manny and Kemp get 5 each, which means 10 outfield games. Now you have 8 outfield games to split up. I say Pierre and Jones get between 3 and 4, which relegates Ethier to 1 to 2 games per week. Drop Ethier. His (minimal) value has been zapped.

For Bay, let’s recollect what we saw last year while he battled through the worst slump of his career. Ground ball to short, ground ball to 2nd, ground ball to short and Bay falls into a mental slump where he’s fooled so bad he swings at some pitches while the ball is still in the pitcher’s hand. Bay will have a better lineup around him, he’ll have the The Green Monster to hit doubles off of and he’ll have the 2nd biggest media town breathing down his neck compared to Pittsburgh, which sports a town that forgot they had the Pirates for parts of ‘07 into ‘08. I hope Bay fails, but I’d say there’s only a 50/50 slot of it legitimately happening.

Now the two schmohawks that emerge from this trade with their value slightly knocked up (Hey, “slightly knocked up” sounds like that girl I went to high school with whose name I can’t remember) are Brandon Moss and Andy LaRoche. First, Laroche gets reunited with a guy who has the same parents. (BTW, Elias Sports Bureau said this is the first time two brothers with a capped letter in the middle of their last name will play together. Actually, Elias Sports Bureau didn’t say that, but it sounds like some nonsense they would say. Some things they have said recently around Elias Sports Bureau’s headquarters, “There’s no M & M’s in the snack machine for the first time since 1999,” “Leandro mowed our lawn on Tuesday for the first time since March,” and “Jimmy, in Accounting, has the worst halitosis of any Elias Sports Bureau employee ever.” But I digress.) So LaRoche only has to beat out Jose Bautista for playing time. Well, color me not worried. LaRoche hasn’t shown many signs in the majors, but he’s a top-level prospect that you should pick up in deep leagues.

Brandon Moss, the new Pirates outfielder, strikes me as the guy in a trade that no one cares about then ends up having lots of value. Or this could be complete hyperbole. Moss flashed some speed and power in the minors and never at the expense of his average. Now he’s not going to be an in-his-prime Bobby Abreu, but he profiles similarly to Andre Ethier. I know, yawn. But unlike Ethier, Moss may get his at-bats and in NL-only play that can help. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Psyche! Before we get into today’s roundup, I just wanted to post Manny being Manny, make sure to watch until the 1:30 mark when Manny reenacts the play. If you don’t get a kick out of it, you’re dead on the inside.

The Rays - I knew they were stingy with their prospects, but I thought they would at least upgrade their bullpen. Nope.

Fausto Carmona - Bounced back from that razztastic start last time out against the Twins to throw 6 and 1/3 innings and to only give up 2 earned. Liked him a lot coming back from the DL and I think he can give you some quality starts moving forward.

Juan Rivera - HR yesterday. I’m pretty sure I’ve already said I’m never talking about him again. So this is your last heads up.

Jim Edmonds - 2 HRs. I almost yawned between writing the 2 and the HRs.

Rich Harden - 7 IP, 1 ER, 9 Ks. He’s given up three runs as a Cub and has K’d 39 in four starts. Well, la-di-da. This was still only his first win for the Cubs. So there.

Dave Bush - 7.1 IP, 6 ER. That whole ‘only starting Bush at home’ thing has worked out remarkably well. Almost as well as the whole ’starting Craig Counsell over Russell Branyan’ thing, but not nearly as well as batting Braun fifth. Not sure why Yost wants to get fired, but he’s obviously managing like he does.

Frank Thomas - Was activated from the DL. If you need home runs, I’d take a flier, but don’t drop anyone too valuable because The Big Hurt is aptly named.

Jim Thome - HR yesterday. As I said yesterday when Griffey was traded, Thome’s going to get his at-bats.

Shane Victorino - I was talking to Rudy about how some people bench Victorino or use him as a throw-in in trades and Rudy said an interesting thing to me, “Is Victorino really that different than Carl Crawford?” Things to make you say, “Hmm…”

Chone Figgins - Went 4-for-5 yesterday and almost .400 in the last seven games. As I told someone yesterday, Figgins can get hot and steal a ton of bases in a month or two. Steals is one category you can make up ground real fast. Saves is another.

Ryan Zimmerman - Left yesterday’s game with a hand injury. This could be a great thing for his owners, you might no longer have to delude yourself into thinking he’s valuable.

Khalil Greene - Reports claim Greene decided to place himself on the Disgraceful List when he punched a storage chest and fractured his hand. However, witnesses say the storage chest was starting Greene at SS all season and by all accounts the storage chest actually threw itself at Greene’s hand. Either way, Greene should be dropped in all leagues, even ten team leagues that only use Padres players. (BTW, in a ten team league that only uses Padres players, I think you have to draft Adrian Gonzalez first. Peavy’s great, but you can get pitching late.)

Todd Jones - Speaking of the Disgraceful List, Todd Jones hits the DL. Reason given by the Tigers for this move, “Well… Dur.”

Matt Holliday hits the 15-day DL with a strained hamstring. I wouldn’t be surprised if he just sat for a few days and pushed through it if the Rockies were in a better position team-wise. Well, ain’t that a kick in the pants? In one NL-Only league I have Holliday, I’m pretty much screwed. Some people who are out there in some leagues (this is the order I’d pick them up, but, as always, it depends on needs): Mike Cameron, Bill Hall, David Murphy, Jose Guillen, Gary Matthews Jr. or Joey Gathright. Then there’s Seth Smith, another stopgap replacement for Matt Holliday, is the rookie call-up that should be replacing him (at least against righties) while Holliday’s on the DL. Is he worth a flier? Sure, but he’s got two strikes against him. 1) The Rockies seem convinced he’s nothing more than a pinch-hitter and 2) The Rockies have options in the outfield. Hopefully you have some maneuverability so you can just pickup a hot hitter and not have to worry if he’s an outfielder. Holliday swears he’ll be back in two weeks on June 8th; he better not pull a Kotchman. Anyway, here’s what I saw yesterday:

Clayton Kershaw - The most hyped non-Mexican, non-Jew Dodgers lefty of all-time. He has the kind of stuff that can battle back from being behind on hitters. Pretty impressive debut. Of course, his ownership is contingent on the farkakteh Yahoo waiver process. I know they are reading this, because they’ve linked here before, so I’m going to explain something to them. Everyone else can skip ahead. Rudy covered this already in one post; I’m adding my two cents. Yahoo, take everyone that is sent down to the minors and pull them from waivers until they are called back up. So if they are not currently rostered and they are in the minors, then they are unavailable. Rich Hill? Yup. Homer Bailey? Yup. Sidney Pollack? Well, he’s a film director, so he should be unavailable too. I prefer everyone is available, but obviously you can’t figure out how to do that. CBS Sportsline and ESPN are doing a lot better job than you, so I’m assuming it’s a financial decision on your part. Well, financially it can’t take much programming (I’m pretty computer-stupid, so I’m not sure about this) for you to simply make everyone in the minors unavailable. This way at least there’s an even playing field. Right now, some minor leaguers are available and others are not. It feels completely willy-nilly and it causes unnecessary confusion. Why would Jay Bruce be available and Clayton Kershaw not be? There’s no reason other than a complete lack of regard for your customers. If this is not rectified by next year, I will do everything in my power to direct people to any site other than Yahoo. Okay, carry on. And thanks for reading!

Kevin Kouzmanoff - A Padres hitter besides A-Gonz that is hot. Weird! Kouzmanoff was a preseason favorite of mine because I figured he’d build on his strong ‘07 second half. Well, it didn’t work out fully like that early on, but he is getting hot now. Here’s hoping he stays hot.

Aaron Cook - Sure, he averages four Ks a game if you count the front and back of his jersey, but he can be useful.

John Maine - If I have a pitcher facing another pitcher on my team or pitching at Coors, I almost always start him. I figure there’s no reason to have a guy if you’re not going to start him. Maine went against Cook today on my ten team mixed league and it worked out fine.

Jon Lester - Make-A-Wish sends Lester back out to do battle on his own.

Ryan Zimmerman - Being outslugged by Aaron Boone. Awesome!

Corey Hart - Last year he didn’t get hot until June. Hopefully that doesn’t mean he’s going to get cold a month earlier this year.

Manny Parra - I think a minor league stint might be in his future. As he’s been pretty, um, sub-Parra.

Cole Hamels - I hate to the bearer of bad news, but knowing Hamels, a bad outing means he’s injured. I sure hope I’m wrong. In his defense, he had a ten minute delay because Carlos Lee bonked the ump with his bat.

John Smoltz - Experienced tightness in his shoulder. The Braves don’t consider it setback. Nah, why would tightness in a shoulder be a problem for a pitcher over the age of forty? I told you two weeks ago to try and trade him if you don’t need saves. At this point, I’m thinking I’d trade him for another closer if you do need saves.

Daniel Cabrera - If you have high blood pressure, you may want to consult with a doctor or Leo Mazzone before adding Daniel Cabrera to your fantasy baseball team.

Nomar Garciaparra/Andruw Jones/Rafael Furcal - When Torre was asked how he felt about the injuries hitting Garciaparra, Jones and Furcal, Torre said, “Two out of three ain’t bad.”

Justin Verlander/C.C. Sabathia - Both pitched well, neither got the win. It’s like their poor Aprils pissed off their teams and now they’re not speaking. Maybe in their next start they can get makeup sex.

Josh Hamilton - He was ejected yesterday. Let’s hope it doesn’t send him on misbehavior spiral. Hopefully he just gets another tattoo and calls it a day.

Fausto Carmona - He’s expected to miss about four weeks with a strain in his left hip. Carmona was seen muttering, “Why can’t I have hips like C.C.? He’s got them good girthing hips.” For his owners, don’t worry, get Laffey. Actually, worry.

J.J. Putz - He blew a save to give the Yanks a three-game sweep. The Mariners management is contemplating whether to outsource the team to Asia.

Jorge Cantu - He hit two more home runs yesterday. What does Florida have to do to suck? Their owner must feel like the female owner in Major League.

Evan Longoria - He gets another big late inning hit. If it weren’t for all those early and mid innings, he’d be hitting higher than .246. Longoria is going to be great. Odds are it won’t be this year. There are more Gordons than Brauns.

Carlos Quentin - While Carlos Quentin may have 14 HRs, Eric Byrnes still has better hair.

Aaron Harang - 9 Ks in 4IP. How hard do you think Dusty had to twist his arm to enter a game facing the Padres at Petco?

Corey Patterson - After going 0 for his first 8 ABs, Corey was successful in sacrificing a player to second. It’s fitting because when Red fans think of sacrificing a player, they think of Corey.

Jay Bruce - Red fans are calling for Bruce so much they sound like they’re from Jersey.

Edinson Volquez - He got Dustied today. No idea how Dusty throws a rookie pitcher out there two days after he threw more than 90 pitches. Somewhere, Mark Prior sheds a tear like a commercial Native American crying at environmental abuse.

Direct TV - I love how I watch a game for six hours and then it cuts out three minutes before Adrian Gonzalez hits a game-winning home run. Maybe Direct TV’s the mastermind behind Yahoo’s waiver process.

Manny Acosta called into Razzball HQ yesterday. Here’s what he had to say, “Upon returnance, John Smoltz can have closer job back. Upon Soriano’s returnance, he can have setup role. Gonzalez wants eighth inning and lefty specialist role? He have it. I’m not a lefty anyway. I wish only good happenings to Mr. Cox, my family, my team and Jesus Cristo. I request Cox do closer by committee until Smoltz returns, because that is the most democratic. Now put me in the sixth inning, so I can avoid this mess. I wish to chillax. I have myself on one fantasy team, and let me say this, ‘I drop myself.’ Now vote Obama!” There you have it, folks. Razzball’s first big scoop. If that doesn’t make us hotter than baby stew, I don’t know what does. Not only has Acosta dropped himself, but he’s also voting Democrat. Anyway, here’s what else I saw:

Royce Ring - Relieved Acosta. I don’t think he’s going to have much value going forward. He’s a lefty specialist, ya’ll.

Jeff Bennett - Relieved Royce Ring retiring rast Radre (okay, a little forced on the alliteration). I have him on one team. The team I’m hoping sucks. Then again, I have Carlos Silva on that team and he only gave up one run against the Mariners. Then again, it was the Mariners.

Buddy Caryle - If The Kouz would’ve reached, Buddy would’ve joined the closer committee. Officially, the Bravos bullpen is filled with options, which makes the Acosta option weak at best. Wait, Acosta’s calling in again, “I told ya. Not interested in closing. Tooooo stressful. And put five ohs on ‘too.’”

Gavin Floyd - *SPOILER ALERT* He’s still not good. Let me put it this way, if he would’ve got a no-hitter, I still wouldn’t have picked him up in any leagues. He’s not a hidden gem that can replace Gallardo or Hill or Smoltz or any other starter you’ve recently lost.

Aaron Harang - Can’t blame him, he pitched well enough to win. Imagine a world where Harang pitched for the Yankees. Now imagine the Yankees played in Petco. Harang’d win twenty-five and would have already dumped Alyssa Milano like three times. Alas, the Reds score no runs every fifth day.

Ben Francisco - He can do what I thought The Big FraGu could do, but he’s going to be doing it in the same crowded outfield so he may not get enough at-bats. If he does get at-bats, he could get to 15/15 and he’s actually already in Yahoo — woo-hoo! But you don’t necessarily want him just yet, except in the deepest of leagues.

Shawn Hill - *looking for positives* Bunch of rinky-dink hits. *looking at negatives* Needs to be more economical. It’s not like he’s striking people out and he’s barely getting through the fifth.

Jacques Jones - Word he might pop up on the Padres or the Marlins. As Chicago once sang, “Look away, baby, look away.” (BTW, I wish Jones pronounced his first name like that black dude from The Real World: San Diego. That’s it; just felt like saying that.)

Wilfredo Ledezma - He’s already gone in my NL-Only league. Why? Cause he’s now the Padres’ fifth starter. Any Padres starter has value because of their home park. He replaces Germano in the rotation. And he begins dating Alyssa Milano by July.

Brian Bannister - This is closer to the type of pitcher he is, not the April guy who everyone was picking up.

Manny Corpas - Struckout Pujols. Sure, it was in the seventh inning, but I wouldn’t count him out just yet.

Felipe Lopez - Oh-for-five with four strikeouts — that’s razztastic.

Orlando Hudson - O-Dog’s hamstring is barking. He didn’t look good on Monday when he was in the starting lineup so it’s not surprising that he was sitting out yesterday’s game.

Austin Kearns - You’re not roping me in this time, Kearns. No, sir. (But he does go on hot streaks and hits home runs in bunches and he just hit a home run and… Oh, he’s roping me in again. I need a support group. Austin’s Kids? The Kearns Trauma Unit? Second Degree Kearns? I don’t know. Rudy probably will come up with something.)

Jhonny Peralta - I like seeing someone batting .219 in May. They’re due. But he’s not exactly a .300 hitter.

Jason Giambi - I really like seeing someone bat .157. But he’s not exactly a .260 hitter.

Robinson Cano - Also batting .157 (weird!). But he’s not exactly Actually, he is better. So what, he bats .310 the rest of the way? .320?

Scott Olsen - I gotta be honest, I kinda wrote him off this year, but he’s always had talent. Opponents are batting .186 against him, but his K/BB is not good and BB/9 isn’t either. A correction could be coming.

Jonathan Sanchez - He gets the Phillies next. I say, no thank you.

Josh Hamilton - If he can steer clear of injuries and crack-cocaine, he could hit 35 in Texas. But, and this is simply hypothetical, if he were to smoke crack-cocaine, I think his power would remain, but he’d probably show flashes of speed. That’s right, Josh Hamilton’s a 35/20 player if he relapses. Downside, rehab group with Dwight Gooden. Upside, first round selection next year. That’s a coin flip if I’m his agent.

Andruw Jones - Batted second yesterday. All I have to say is, “Ha!”

Blake DeWitt - Now has two home runs in two days. Tonight’s was of the inside the park variety. He doesn’t have much upside.

Santiago Casilla - Now has a save to go with his perfect ERA. Huston Street loses a fibula or some shizz by the All-Star break and he’s closing.

Jeff Mathis - Now in a 3-for-28 slump. In the world of catchers who aren’t owned, I like Dioner Navarro.

Stephen Drew - Fourth home run, should be owned in all leagues. Well, not all leagues, cause there are some that only play with the American League guys.

Ryan Ludwick - Let’s assume LaRussa’s hitting the juice again, but even he has to see Ludwick deserves to be in the starting lineup.

AJ Burnett - How about this line: 6 IP, 10Ks, 9 hits, 5 earned runs. Looked like half the team couldn’t figure him out and the other half couldn’t wait to face him.

Carlos Pena - Almost forty strikeouts. Cust kayin’.

Nate McLouth - Nine home runs?! He’s like Andy Van Slyke’s kid brother. All he needs is a prima donna LF.

In his first major league start, Max Scherzer didn’t look like Jobacum, Linecum and Joba’s love child, just a nervous rookie pitcher. You see a lot of unearned runs and you think to yourself, “Leave it to the Baby-Backs to fark up my man Jobacum.” Yeah, that was a gift by the official scorer. That call could’ve went either way and I think it probably should’ve been a hit. So the ERA should’ve been higher. Balls were hit hard. To paraphrase Randy Jackson, “He didn’t look so pitchy, dawg.” With just 119 1/3 innings last season and Doug Davis set to press him for his rotation spot when he returns, Scherzer probably won’t stick in the rotation. Doug Davis is far from a sure thing, but Scherzer’s innings are really the concern. I could see Scherzer put into a long relief role within a month to make sure Jobacum doesn’t blow his load. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday:

Johnny Cueto - C’mon, he looks ridunkous. Are you kidding me? 41/8 K/BB. That’s nasty. Seriously, that alone is really all you need to know. I’ve watched him pitch every game and that number is not misrepresenting anything. When I was watching him today I realized something, the batter knows what’s coming and still can’t hit it! (Sorry for the exclamation point, but I felt it was necessary.) This is tremendous. The only thing stopping him is a manager that won’t want to drive up his innings…. Oh, wait, Dusty’s managing him. Okay, so don’t draft him in 2010 when he has 700 innings on his arm.

Geovany Soto - Got a hold of one off of Soto. I still say to trade him if you can get the right deal.

Brad Hawpe - Two home runs now in three days. Still wouldn’t start him against lefties. That’s why you carry Spilborghs, whose porn mustache should have its own harem, on your deep league roster.

Eric Byrnes - You’re wondering why he’s slumping so bad, then you realize last year was the outlier (Word of the Day). He has a .267 career average. He is what he is, but he’s not what he was last year.

Chad Billingsley - I keep pimping him and I keep getting questions, “Should I trade Arod, Magglio and my son’s college tuition money for Cliff Lee?” Cliff Lee’s masquerading, Billingsley is not.

Andruw Jones - He’s batting seventh and platooning within The Pierre Situation™. He’s really not on anyone’s team anymore, is he? I mean, he’s no longer even running balls out. I predicted he’d be retired by the age of 35. I might knock that down to 33. He’s gone from Hall of Fame talk to I Wish Pierre Was Starting Instead of Him talk in a little over two years. Torre needs to go Full Metal Jacket, “I’m going to rip your balls off, so you cannot contaminate the rest of the team! I will motivate you, Andruw Jones!”

David Ortiz - So I, like, traded Ortiz for Cliff Lee and I’m, like, wondering if I did good. People need to chillax with burying Ortiz. Sure, he’s probably a few years older than Miguel Tejada who’s probably a few years older than he’s now owning up to, but Ortiz will be fine.

Joey Devine - Waking Joey Devine has three wins on the year and he’s the setup man in case Huston Street keeps blowing saves.

Daisuke Matsuzaka - The walks will come back to hurt him at some point. Probably will have an ERA of 4 by the All-Star break.

Wladimir Balentien - Wlady B. hit his second home run.

Jarrod Saltalamacchia - God, his last name is a real pain to spell. He DH’d today. If he’s getting in there when he’s not catching, there’s no reason why he shouldn’t be owned in shallow mixed leagues.

Ervin Santana - Probably could have pitched into the tenth inning if he was needed. 38/9 K/BB and he just keeps looking better.

Brandon Wood - First home run of the season. Loved to see him get some time, but right now there’s no guarantee of that.

Shane Victorino - Member last week when he was sitting in favor of Werth? He didn’t sit today. Or yesterday. Or the day before. Or the… Well, you get the picture.

Matt Kemp - Third home run. He doesn’t get to twenty.

Matt Joyce - Was called up as the Tigers designated Jacques Jones for assignment. Joyce has some pop against righties, and can strikeout with the best of them. Of course, he’s not in Yahoo anyway. I’m going to write an E-Book, “Fantasy Baseball Sites Need Ten Things.” Players available on waivers is numero freakin’ uno. I don’t even want to pick up Joyce, but this is really annoying.

The Giants report John Bowker will steal time away Randy Winn. Might take a bulk of the at-bats at first away from Aurilla. This is terrific news for Bowker and the Giants. But for you the fantasy baseball player, I say, “Eh.” Bowker’s minor league stats show a guy who struck out a lot, didn’t walk too much and is being slightly rushed. Could he be a surprise feel-good story for the Giants and fantasy owners? Maybe, but very doubtful. In his last full season of minor league ball (at AA), he went 79/.307/22/90 with 103 strikeouts and 44 walks in 522 at-bats. Decent enough numbers, but this season he should be in Triple A showing that his Double A numbers aren’t a fluke. If I have an empty bench slot, I’d grab a middle reliever before I went anywhere near John Bowker. If you’re in dire need of an outfielder, go Bowkers! But Bowker might be back in the minors in a month.

Andruw Jones - He was batting eighth. If you have him, unfurl your contingency plans — stat.

Corey Patterson - He went into a slide, now he’s not even playing against righties. Not good, friend. Not good at all.

Xavier Nady - Now batting .347 with 17 RBIs. I told you three weeks ago, you never know where hot streaks are going to come from or for how long they’re going to last. Cust kayin’.

Matt Murton - He was called up and benched. Hope he enjoyed sex with Piniella’s wife or whatever it was that put him in the perennial doghouse.

Matt Diaz - He’s sitting against righties again. This could continue indefinitely. It’s much worse than Kelly Johnson sitting against lefties because of the sheer number of righty pitchers.

John Maine - Looked good. Think he can get much better.

Tim Hudson - Don’t take this wrong way, I like him, but he didn’t look that good yesterday. Lots of balls hit hard.

Calos Villanueva - Other than some early inning wildness, he looked decent. Would’ve liked to have seen more Ks, but still a good start.

Mark Reynolds - Why anyone is throwing him fastballs is behind me, but he went deep again. Fingercuffing sucks.

Armando Galarraga - All he does is win! I wouldn’t pick him up. If you can not look good pitching 5 1/3 innings of scoreless baseball, he did it.

Eugenio Velez - On every other team, he’d be in the minors or a pinch runner.

Joba Chamberlain - Hank Steinbrenner said only “an idiot” would keep Joba as a setup man. Cashman and Girardi said they’re idiots then. Good to see no matter what Stein is behind the wheel, same nonsense.

Adam Wainwright - If I were the type to boost my preseason predictions after three weeks, I would boost his.

Michael Bourn - He already has 13 steals. Could he get 70 steals? Yup. In December of ‘07, I said to draft Bourn not only because of the steals, but “…Baseball America pointed out (Bourn) as having the “Best Strike Zone Discipline.” Okay, not exactly Best Newcomer at the AVN Awards, but strike zone discipline is not a bad thing to have for a leadoff man. I’m talking to you, Granderson.” And that’s me quoting me.