When Sveum told Rafael Dolis that they need him to fill in for Carlos Marmol, he took them way too literally. “So you don’t want me to walk everyone while blowing games? Totally mi mal!” That was Rafael Dolis talking through his translator who speaks Spanglish. “Can we get a translator who speaks English and Spanish…Separately!” That’s Sveum losing his shizz.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Alexei Ramirez
The top 20 shortstops for 2012 fantasy baseball are a shallow bowl of dung and even the catchers are ranked ahead of them for depth. All the 2012 fantasy baseball rankings can be found under that thing that says 2012 fantasy baseball rankings. (Don’t worry, one of my New Year’s Resolutions is to link to things a little more seamlessly). Shortstops usually get the short end of the stick when I’m drafting. If I don’t get a top guy from the first two rounds, I’ll probably just take a flyer on some late round player. Honestly, I don’t even really want to mess with Tulo, Reyes and Ramirez. So, to amend what I just said, I usually just take a late flyer on a shortstop. I honestly can’t remember the last time I drafted a 1st or 2nd round shortstop, and I play in about ten leagues per year. In leagues that play a middle infielder, then you might need two of these schmohawks. Hopefully, you can grab two decent 2nd basemen and only need one of these guys. As with the other top 20 rankings, I point out where I think tiers start and stop and my projections. Anyway, here’s the top 20 shortstops for 2012 fantasy baseball:
1.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Top 20 catchers, 1st basemen, 2nd basemen and 3rd basemen are in the books. What a strange, glorious trip it’s been! Though not really. Today, the top 20 shortstops for 2011 fantasy baseball get to shine. Hmm… Actually, most of these won’t shine. They’re cloudy with a chance of crapballs. As I said in the 2nd baseball recap post, the shortstops are almost exactly as shallow as the shortstops and 3rd basemen. Now it’s time to be a bit more specific. The top ten shortstops were better than the 2nd basemen and 3rd basemen. Yes, that is scary. Though if you were in a deeper league or if you used an MI, the fall off from the 13th to 20th ranked shortstops is not pretty, whereas the 2nd basemen held their value as you dropped down the rankings. 3rd base was as big a mess in the lower half of the rankings as shortstops. Okay, enough of the hubbub on the tomfoolery. To recap, this final ranking is from ESPN Player Rater with my comments. The Player Rater allows me to be impartial while looking at how I ranked them in the preseason. Anyway, here’s the top 20 shortstops for 2011 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:
1.
Please, blog, may I have some more?I think I made up the word excellers, but it should be a word, so add it into your Merriam-Webster, who was not a spinoff character from that Emmanuel Lewis show. Never the hoo! Here’s some 2nd half hitters for fantasy baseball who should be better than they were in the first half. To come up with this list, I scoured the last three years of post-All-Star Break numbers, ran it through a supercomputer that’s bigger than your Peugeot, pasted the supercomputer-generated names to my shirt like dollar bills on a wedding dress then went to a palm reader to help me pick ten names out of the thousands. The palm reader’s name was Erica Karabell; she said there was no relation. Anyway, here’s the best 2nd half fantasy baseball hitters for 2011:
Derrek Lee – Last year, he played the 2nd half like he was walking onto a yacht with an apricot scarf. In 2009, .336 with 18 homers. Last year, .298 with 9 homers compared to a .233 average in the 1st half. I still don’t really like Derrek Lee compared to a lot of names, but he’ll come a lot cheaper than most.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Josh Hamilton left the game with a fracture to his humerus bone, which isn’t connected to the funny bone. He was going down the line head first into home and… Well, he’s Mr. Glass, so what do you expect? Ron Washington can’t believe anyone could ever get hurt going down a line head first. “Nothing but fun to be had there!” That’s Washington talking about the devil’s dandruff. I think Kinsler, Cruz and Hamilton share gloves so one of them must always be on the DL. This opens up playing time for David Murphy. I’ve long been a fan of Murph. Has 15/15 potential and won’t kill you in any categories. I’d grab him in all leagues. Yeah, even yours. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Chris Davis – With the injury to Hamilton, Davis was recalled. Somewhere, Bill James can now wear his cut-off, denim shorts and proudly show off his tramp stamp tattoo that reads, “I love Chris Davis.” Without an injury, I can’t imagine Davis gets much playing time, but he’s still worth a pick up in AL-Only leagues for the off chance of him pulling magic out of his hat.
Please, blog, may I have some more?The top 20 shortstops for 2011 fantasy baseball are a shallow bowl of dung and ranked only ahead of the catchers for depth. All the 2011 fantasy baseball rankings can be found under that thing that says 2011 fantasy baseball rankings. (Don’t worry, one of my New Year’s Resolutions is to link to things a little more seamlessly). Shortstops usually get the short end of the stick when I’m drafting. If I don’t get Hanley, I’ll probably just take a flier on some late round player. Yes, I don’t even really want to mess with Tulo. In leagues that play a middle infielder, then you might need two of these schmohawks. Hopefully, you can grab two decent 2nd basemen and only need one of these guys. As with the other top 20 rankings, I point out where I think tiers start and stop and my projections. Anyway, here’s the top 20 shortstops for 2011 fantasy baseball:
1.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Top twenty catchers, 1st basemen and 2nd basemen are in the books as we throw it around the horn. Today, the top 20 Shortstops for 2010 fantasy baseball get to shine. Hmm… Actually, most of these won’t shine. They’re cloudy with a chance of crapballs. As I said in the beginning of the year, the shortstops are even shallower than the 2nd basemen. This held true. A good two weeks in the major leagues and you too can make the top twenty list for shortstops! Okay, enough of the hubbub on the tomfoolery. To recap, this final ranking is from ESPN Player Rater with my comments. The Player Rater allows me to be impartial while looking at how I ranked them in the preseason. Anyway, here’s the top 20 shortstops for 2010 fantasy baseball and how they compare to where I originally ranked them:
1.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Jake Westbrook had everything going against him. No schools in his area had an athletic program. His mother was strung out on drugs. His father was absent from his life. Then he met Sandra Bullock. Wait, those aren’t my notes, that’s the back cover of The Blind Side DVD. Yesterday, Westbrook threw 8 IP, 0 ER, 9 baserunners, 3 Ks. Okay, in the broader sense, Westbrook is the dog’s breakfast, but you mix that with one certain pitching coach and, well… For his next trick, Dave Duncan will turn a cucumber into a pickle…mobile! I don’t think it lasts for Westbrook, but he gets the Pirates next. It’s September, you shouldn’t need more. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Tim Stauffer – 5 IP, 4 ER, 8 baserunners, 2 Ks. You don’t get them wet, you don’t expose them to light, you don’t feed them after midnight and you never start a hodgepadre away from Petco.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Paul Konerko went 5-for-5 yesterday with his 31st homer. Paul Konerko is also winning your league for you. You had your back up against the wall. You took Hanley in the first round, Halladay in the 2nd and then you hit the 20th round and you were like, “Hmm… I totally screwed myself by not taking a 1st baseman. Do I take that guy on the Marlins with a girl’s name or should I take Konerko?” When you took Konerko, you figured you would need to trade for someone. Whoa, what’s this? Konerko’s hitting? “Hey, baby, you’re eating dinner by yourself tonight. Paul Konerko due up sixth this inning, according to Fantasycast. Now please don’t come into my man cave.” When you go to the White Sox Fantasy Camp in seven years, you can tell him how he won your league for you while ruining your marriage. These late round fliers in drafts are always so maddening. If I would’ve just took Konerko instead of Stupid-Face Headley. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Mark Buehrle – 7 IP, 0 ER, 6 baserunners, 4 Ks. His season ERA is down to 3.87 and 12 wins is pretty good, but that’s now 8 Ks in 28 IP for August. Is there a less aptly-surnamed player in the game? Seems like Mark Crafty or Mark Wiley would be better names.
Please, blog, may I have some more?Logan Morrison played at the same community college as Albert Pujols. That’s two more MLB players than Middlesex County College or MC-squared as we called it. Let’s look at what Stephen wrote about Morrison, “Blessed with a balanced, flat swing with plus-power, and the organization’s best plate-discipline… The only thing more exciting than Morrison is pasting copies of Grey’s photo to a dartboard and piercing his eyeballs.” Hmm… Hadn’t read that last part before. A rookie with good plate discipline and power is really all you need to know when considering a guy for keepers. Own and own now. So is it time to get on board the LogaMotive in redraft leagues? As a disgruntled horse would say, “What the hey?” When met with choosing between upside and a random schmohawk outfielder behind door number three, you go with upside. Just don’t crazy and drop anyone too valuable. I imagine Morrison will lose some playing time to Bonifacio and might struggle in the beginning. Conservatively, I’ve give him 8 homers and a decent average. The upside is obviously there and if he hits out of the gate, his name value will provide more than his actual worth on the trade market. A lot depends on if the Marlins take it fast or slow with LogaMo. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Jason Bay – Out with a mild concussion. This would explain a lot if it happened in March and was just discovered.
Please, blog, may I have some more?