Our fearless leader has been crippled by some Kryptonic supermarket macaroni salad so I will be your tour guide through the daily baseball comings and goings.

So J.P. Ricciardi waved goodbye to Alex Rios and freed up some money so he can buy some tickets to Moneyball The Movie and to get one of them new-fangled Adam Dunn verification machines for his phone.  Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Who Knew?  Apparently, everyone.  I may have been the only one rooting for Aaron Heilman; Lou definitely was not.  Well, open that window and throw Heilman out.  Sean Marshall has been named the Cubs fifth starter.  As I said somewhere in the comments in the last couple of days, I like whoever comes away with the 5th starter job for the Cubs.  Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Because Casey Kotchman is most noteworthy (in my eyes) for having the longest known case of mononucleosis, it makes sense he’d be considered a sleeper.  Only, not necessarily, a fantasy baseball sleeper.  More like a Prince Valium one.  After the trade to the Braves last year, Casey Kotchman hit 2/20/.237.  Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Remember the blonde chick from the The Real World:  Hawaii, who, like, totally fell for Colin?  She was the cute girl with the young grandmother body.  You know who I’m talking about?  Cool.  Yeah, she’s not Kendry Morales.  Kendry Morales is the doode that the Angels are putting in as their starting 1st baseman.  Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

If I may jump into the cavern of your noggin for a moment, you’re probably thinking, “Lastings Milledge — isn’t he that failed prospect the Mets gave up on?”  Slow your roll there.  He’s only 23 years old.  Or maybe you’re thinking, “I could’ve sworn I remember seeing Milledge on my league’s waivers last year.”  You’re right; Milledge clogged up outfields last year with non-digestible tools causing many to drop him.  Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?