“I know it was you, Alfredo, you broke my heart–because I should have picked you up yesterday. You’re nothing to me now. Not a brother, not a friend–but, I’ll admit you may be an intriguing add in fantasy baseball this week.” Michael Corleone’s words for his fantasy team are harsh but true. Reds pitcher Alfredo Simon continued his streak of success yesterday, pitching six scoreless innings versus the Cubs, allowing just six base runners and striking out three. Coming off the heels of an eight inning gem last week against Tampa, where he allowed just one run and struck out four, Alfredo now has pitched 21.0 innings, allowing just 2 ER and 13 hits, while grabbing two wins. It looks like he’ll stick in the rotation while Mat Latos is on the shelf. Simon’s sparkling 0.86 ERA is good for top 3 in the league, and the 0.81 WHIP sure is purdy. But before you go racing to the waiver wire dropping your Stephen Strasburgs or your R.A. Dickeys for this guy, just wait a second. Because I didn’t say Simon says? Got ya! I know. Bad. I’m sorry. Anyway, let’s examine if Simon says you should grab Alfredo or not. If we look closer into the starts, it’s a small sample size but we get the sense he’s been pretty lucky so far, and not just because he’s faced the Mets, Rays and Cubs. Simon’s .194 BABIP is good for top 10 in the league. Along with a 3.14 FIP (3.90 xFIP) and an insane 94.3 LOB% we have a ton a nerdy stats that say major regression coming. Translation: Alfredo is probably gonna get sauced. Mama mia! That’s not to say that those numbers are not still very good. After moving to Cincinnati from Baltimore, Simon was awesome in relief, with a 2.76 ERA and 1.25 WHIP in two years from 2012-2013, way above his career averages (3.98 ERA and 1.33 WHIP). And he’s been extremely efficient as a starter this year as his 13.4 pitches thrown per inning (roughly 3.5 per batter) shows. Doode is doing work. The 13/4 K/BB ratio is nothing special, but he is working efficiently in his starts, going deep into games. So Simon says, if you need a streamer you can grab AlFredo for his next start in Pittsburgh. He’s under 20% owned, and he’s making us an offer we can’t refuse. Ride this hot streak out for now, but if he’s ready to sleep with the fishes don’t hesitate to take him out to the middle of Lake Tahoe and take care of business.
Here’s what else happened Friday night in fantasy baseball:
Aaron Harang – 7.0 IP, 0 ER, 6 BB, 5 K and his third win. The Harangutan has done did it again! This time going seven without giving up a hit, but left after throwing 121 pitches. It was the second time in his career Harang had been pulled from a no hitter. How you gon’ do me like that, Skip? The no-no was broken up in the 7th, but still a great outing for Harang. His 0.82 ERA leads the league and opponents are batting just .108 against him. Braves signed him a week before the season started. What is happening? The karma gods are catching up to him because he has the worst ESPN player page photo in the league.
Freddie Freeman – 2-for-5 with a 2-run HR, his 5th. The scary thing for pitchers about Freddie is that he can hit home runs off of them while they sleep, in their nightmares.
Jeff Samardzija – 7.0 IP, 8 base runners, 1 ER, 7 K. Z-Marge the Shark pitched well, but (cue Jaws music) the Cubs defense and offense let him down. He remains winless. The Reds stole five bases in this one so there was definitely something funny going on. They weren’t all stolen by Billy Hamilton either, because that would make Billy’s owners way too happy. Simmer dah nah, Billy’s owners, if he keeps this up he might be as good as Eric Young Jr. some day.
Carlos Gomez – 2-for-5 and his 5th HR. I almost feel like I’m insulting him calling him CarGo Lite. Is he on like “full-fat” CarGo levels now? All the calories! Fantasy baseball has changed so much in two years. Down is the new up. East is the new west. Orange is the new black. Carlos Gomez is the new CarGo. Carlos Gonzalez is still CarGo too though. There are two CarGos!
Melky Cabrera 4-for-5, 1 run. He’s batting .333 with 4 HR and 2 SB. You know it’s gotta be that secret stuff he’s been drinking. Don’t worry you can legally buy it on Cabrera’s very official looking web page. The site may or may not give you malware, but the stuff is there.
Drew Hutchinson – 5.1, 8 hits, 0 BB, 9 K. Shut down the Injians for 5.1 IP but was forced from the game after Carlos Santana‘s 2-run HR. Grey told you to BUY him and Hutch could be a decent streaming option next week versus the Orioles. Starsky, on the other hand, I can’t recommend until I see more.
Justin Masterson – 6.1 IP, 8 base runners, 2 ER, 9 K. Nasty Masty! Yeah boy, pitch one more game like this and then I can trade you.
Sergio Santos – 1.0 IP, 3 base runners, 2 K and his 5th save. Sheesh. Not for the faint of heart and not exactly helping his case to remain the closer, but Brett Cecil wasn’t much better. Looks like they’re sticking with Santos for now, but don’t be shocked if Cecil, Steve Delabar, or Neil Wagner see a chance.
Jonathan Schoop – 4-for-5, 1 run, 2 RBI. Schoop ba doop! You probably remember Schoop as the hero in the Netherlands win over Australia in last spring’s World Baseball Classic. What? No one watches the WBC? Why? Like you had anything better to do in March 2013. Pfft. Anyway, the Orioles scored 8 runs on 15 hits at Fenway North, with two-hit games from Adam Jones, Nick Markakis, J.J. Hardy and Steve Lombardozzi. Meanwhile, Chris Davis was 0-for-4 with 3 strikeouts. That’s gotta hoyt.
Nate Eovaldi – 6.0 IP, 9 base runners, 1 ER, 4 K. Nate the Great’s still just under 30% owned somehow, and Razzball has been telling you to buy him for weeks. Unlike Alfredo Simon, Nate’s starts tell a different story. His 2.12 FIP (3.12 xFIP) along with a .350 BABIP suggest he’s been a tad unlucky. He should be much better than his 3.55 ERA suggests. The strikeouts are still there (8.17 K/9) , he’s got an a-some 23/3 K/BB ratio, he throws 100+ mph, he gets the K-happy Braves next week, and he’s got Giancarlo Stanton on his team. What’s not to love? I’m buying.
Giancarlo Stanton – 3-for-3, 5 RBI with a walk-off grand salami with the game tied in the 9th inning, his 6th HR. Cause he’s just a straight up G like that. That’s how he do. He’s got 26 RBIs in 17 games. That leads the league, yo! Oh, G-Carlo. You are just my favorite human person. I wrote a love song about Stanton a few years ago, but I had to change all the “Mikes” to “Giancarlos” and it just doesn’t rhyme as well anymore.
Christian Yelich – 3-for-5, run. Want to make a Christian Yelich? Take away his bible. Ha! No but seriously folks, I’m here all week.
Jarrod Saltalamacchia – 2-for-3 with his 2nd HR. Is it just me or you guys loving the Marlins 1-2-3 in the batting order? It’s everything after that that’s…ehhhhh notsogood. The way I see it Salty’s good for a great game every two weeks or so, which I guess is as good as any catcher.
Abraham Almonte – 2-for-5, 2 runs. I’m constantly tempted to pick up Abraham when I see him on the sidewalk, but I’m afraid people will call me cheap.
Jason Vargas – 7.0 IP, 7 hits, 0 ER, 4 K. JV continues to pitch like a boss. Last night he was all like gold teeth, grey goose, trippin’ in the bathroom, blood stains, ball gowns, trashin’ the hotel room, he don’t care. He’s striking Miggy out in his dreams. Vargas is still under 50% owned, but that number seems to be growing fast, so grab him for his start next week if he’s available. The .202 BABIP is kind of crazy but enjoy it! He’s given up just three runs in 29.0 IP and his 1.29 ERA is top 10 in the league. KC’s staff has been great so far, but they’ll never be Royals until that offense starts hitting.
Mike Moustakas – 1-for-4 with his 2nd HR. I thought about the possibility of thinking about maybe considering the prospect of deciding whether or not I should pick him up. But then the LSD kind of wore off so I decided to go swimming.
Erik Bedard – 3.2 IP, 6 hits, 4 ER. LOL. At least he didn’t get injured. Stream-O-Nator liked this start too, but he can’t be right all the time. If he were, the machines would rise up and SkyNet would take over the world just like James Cameron predicted. Every once in a while Erik Bedard has to get rocked to keep the robots in check.
Wil Myers – 3-for-5, 3 RBI. Grey told you this week to BUY Wil “I passed the other L to the player on my left” Myers and I have to concur. This kid’s gonna be a star! Ha-cha-cha! The Rays scored 11 runs on 16 hits. Evan Longoria chipped in 3 hits and James Loney had 2 hits and 4 RBI. The Yanks bullpen really blew this one for Hiroki Kuroda (5.2 IP, 7 hits, 3 ER, 2 K), four relievers combined to give up 8 ER. Woof.
Drew Smyly – 3.0 IP, 6 hits, 4 ER, 2 BB, 2 K. Sad face baby tiger emoji with tears in his eyes.
Albert Pujols – 2-for-4 with a 3-run HR, his 5th. That Angels offense is looking pretttay, prettaaay, pretty good, they’ve scored 42 runs in the past seven games! I’m not saying its all because Pujols is back (because its all because of Mike Trout (2-for-3, 2 runs, 2 RBI, SB)), but it just maybe possibly might have something to do with Albert Pujols being, uh, I dunno, BACK! (It doesn’t. It’s because of Mike Trout).
Howard Kendrick – 3-for-5, 2 2-run HRs. Don’t call him Howie! He’s not a kid anymore, and that means he don’t play.
Charlie Blackmon – 3-for-5, 2 runs, RBI, now batting .426. That’s second in the league. And guess what, ya’ll? The Rockies are back in Colorado! Stream away. Hey-yooo! The Rox scored 12 runs on 18 hits. Welcome home, boys. Drew Stubbs had 3 hits, Wilin Rosario had 2 hits, D.J. LeMahieu had 2 hits, EVER-BODY-GETS-A-HIT! Thanks Oprah!
Troy Tulowitzki – 3-for-3, 2-run HR, 5 RBI. Batting an awesome .360 with eight extra base hits and a .460 OBP. I have to tread carefully here. One wrong move and Tulo’s back to the 60 day DL.
Tyson Ross – 8.0 IP, 4 hits, 0 ER, 9 K. Hodgepadre! His second straight excellent start, and he’s got 25 Ks in 25.1 innings this year. Don’t mind if I do! He’s under 10% owned but I’m not crazy about his start in Milwaukee next week. Would you believe I picked up Ross and streamed him yesterday? #humblebrag No? Fine then! Forget it and forget you, CeeLo!
Brandon Belt – 2-for-4 with his 6th HR in the 9th off Huston Street. Belt is off the chain! Which is strange because my wallet chain hangs off my belt. Of course I wear a wallet chain! I wouldn’t want my Subway Sub Club card and my two dollar bill to gets snatched from me in the street. That sub club card has 4 punches, ya’ll!
Matt Cain – 7.0 IP, 6 base runners, 0 ER, 8 K. Cain got saddled with his third loss despite having a 2.88 ERA through his first four starts. The Giants are averaging just 1.75 runs scored in Matt’s starts. That’s the fifth worst run support in the league. Matt Cain do it, but the Giant Cain’t get it done for him. Sounds like a buy low opportunity to me.
Sonny Gray – 6.0 IP, 9 hits, 3 ER, 2 BB, 4 K, 3rd win. Son-ny Gray, getting wins, for the A’s. On his way, to winning my fant-a-sy leeeeeague! Can you tell me how to get, Son-ny Gray on ev-er-y teeeeam! I managed to get special guest, The Count, to help us out with the strikeouts. Take it away, Count: “One! Two! Three! Four! Four strikeouts! Mwah-ha-ha! I love to count!” You sure do Count, you sure do.
Yoenis Cespedes – 3-for-4, 4th HR, 3 RBI. “Uno! Dos! Tres! Cuatro! Cuatro jonrones! Ja ja ja! Me amo contar!” OK, Count, we get it. Time to go home now.
Josh Reddick – 3-for-4, 2-run HR, his 1st. There was talk that Reddick would be sent down last week, so this was nice to see from JR. He’s got just seven total hits on the year and three were in this game, so let’s hope this is the sign of things to come. Good things.
George Springer – 2-for-5, RBI, SB. Springer has Sprunger! #astrosworldseries2014
Wade Miley - 6.0 IP, 2 hits, 1 ER, 5 BB, 8 K. Threw 106 pitches through six innings but immediately surrendered a HR to Scott Van Slyke when he was brought back out for the seventh. When asked about coming back out for the seventh inning, Miley said, “It’s my party I can do what I want to. It’s my party I can pitch when I want to. Cause I can’t stop, and I won’t stop. Can’t you see it’s me who owned the night? Bangerz, yo.” Thanks, Miley, that was, um, weird.
Elvis Andrus – 1-for-2, 2 runs, 2 SB, now has eight. His speed has gotten pitchers All Shook up. I guess they need to have Suspicious Minds when Elvis is on base.
Felipe Paulino – 3.2 IP, 13 hits, 10 ER. The Rangers were on a mission last night, Alex Rios, Robinson Chirinos, Jim Adduci and Leonys Martin (HR, 4 RBI) had three hit games. While Prince Fielder and one of this week’s BUYs Kevin Kouzmanoff added two hits a piece. Paulino’s ERA is now 11.29 and he was not taking it well at all. He was a bit shaken and needed to take four Zanax post game just to stop screaming. I guess that’s what happens when you mess with Texas.
Martin Perez – 9.0 IP, 5 hits, 8 Ks, for the complete game shut out and his third straight win. Damn Gina! It was the first career shutout for the young lefty. I feel like I own Perez everywhere. Based solely on dumb luck it just turned out that way. The Rangers gave him a nice big contract so I just figured they must know something I don’t. That’s why I’m so happy, Pharrell. Clap along if you must. Martin has given up just 6 ER in 29.0 IP, with 0 ER in his past two starts. Yes, please and thank you. The 20/7 K/BB ratio isn’t bad either. I am shocked he is under 25% owned in ESPN leagues. Shocked and awed. He gets Oakland next week and he’s sporting a sick 1.86 ERA and 1.03 WHIP. He needs to be owned everywhere. Don’t make me beg you.
Questions? Problems? Complaints to the management? Advice, small gifts or large bribes? Please leave it in the comments below, or you can get at me on twitter @dandemanco. Join us next Saturday for another Friday recap as fantasy baseball continues next week, all week long!