Was talking to some friends the other day and one of them thought Ichiro Suzuki was the best all around player he had ever seen. No, he wasn’t Asian or wearing a Buhner jersey. He made his case — defense, cannon arm, can hit any pitch to any field, speed, etc. I countered Rickey Henderson was better. Then somehow it dissolved into how did Bud Selig let steroids ruin baseball. But when he said Ichiro, it wasn’t a slam dunk, “We’re only on our second pitcher of Molson. How are you already drunk?” It was a point to consider. I guess in fantasy baseball sometimes we forget about how great players were or are and only concern ourselves with the numbers. Ah… Nostalgia, I remember you! Well, the numbers say Ichiro is currently ranked 56th for Runs for all outfielders. Behind some stalwarts as Fukudome, Teahen and Skip Schumaker. He’s currently ranked 100th in RBIs just behind Joe Thurston. Hey, he’s got speed though, right? He has 12 steals. The same as Vernon Wells. Ichiro is terrific for average, but that’s only getting you so far. He’s extremely valuable for average. If you need a boost there, then by all means trade for him. But if you’re fine on average or hurting elsewhere, I’d look to trade away Ichiro. Anyway, here’s some more players to buy or sell this week in fantasy baseball:
BUY
Chad Gaudin – NL West starter? Oh, Grey must own him. I do, random italicized voice. But get a load of this, he has an over 9 K/9. Sure, he could flipping walk Alfonso Soriano and Chris Davis on four pitches. But so what? He’s a 5th to 6th fantasy starter. You’re not relying on him to anchor your staff. (But if you do find your staff is anchored. Try Viagra.) Right now he has a 4.04 FIP and a 5.60 ERA, so he can and should be better going forward. He’ll do you no favors on WHIP, but even if you’re only starting him at home — go for it!
Kevin Correia – I smell a theme coming on, son. A theme coming on. Honestly, if Livan Hernandez pitched for the Padres, I’d probably own him in one league. Correia has a 2.90 ERA in June, about a 8 K/9 and an under 1.00 WHIP.
Joe Blanton – What, no Josh Geer? Blanton was a 5 K/9 coming into this year. He’s over 8 so far this year. Don’t wait for answers, just take your chances. Don’t ask me why.
Everth Cabrera – SAGNOF!
Scott Hairston – Really hasn’t earned all the pub I’ve been giving him, but he’s batting third yadda yadda yadda. Okay, now I really have to abandon the Padres theme.
Pat Burrell – Member how hot Luke Scott was a month ago? Burrell can do the same.
Mike Cuddyer – Could get 2nd base eligibility this weekend in some leagues that only need a few starts.
Leo Nunez – Should get the majority of the saves for the ‘lins.
Dan Meyer – SAGNOF, but he might be just a quality middle reliever. So those in Holds leagues, HAGNOF! Actually, Holds do have a face. And they look like Tackleberry.
LaTroy Hawkins – Valgreen’s may get traded before the deadline, so this could give Hawkins a chance to further shake his Cuddle Boy label. I’d grab him if you have room.
Wladimir Balentien – With vampires being the zeitgeist right now, it’s only natural that Wlad the Lunchpailer would be a popular add. Yum, a 4th outfielder and cheese sandwich. (BTW, isn’t it odd how dated the word zeitgeist is?)
Jordan Zimmermann – You’re showing Jordan Zimmermann, the dealer’s showing John Lannan. You win.
Homer Bailey – Picture this, Homer’s given up 3 runs, but he’s in line for the win. You’re ecstatic. You call your estranged Auntie Marie in Pensacola and tell her you want her at the family reunion. Then Dusty runs Bailey out there for the sixth inning where he gives up 17 runs. In archaic words, caveat emptor.
SELL
Grady Sizemore – With the Indians treading water in the AL Central, the smallest setback to Grady’s elbow could shut him down. He just hit a homer and he looks to be back. Terrific! Last week, we said, “If you can trade him for 80 cents on the dollar (say, Alexis Rios, Granderson, Holliday, etc.), do it in a heartbeat…..Crazy that the most Grady player on the Indians might be Shin-Soo Choo.” And that’s me quoting us! Now don’t sell him for a can of Coke Zero and a pufferfish, no one said to do that.
Nick Blackburn – More of a hold than a Sell, but I just can’t get behind a pitcher who has 41 Ks in over 100 innings. He could be great for the rest of the season, but I’m not buying into it.
Scott Rolen – Hitting .330 so maybe some of youse are thinking Rolen’s, um, rolling. But he has 5 homers and 3 steals. Who is he? Crapolanco? His career average is 50 points below where he is now. Regression right ahead!
George Sherrill – But he’s practically a donkey-corn! The Orioles may trade Sherrill and his new destination may not include saving games.
Johnny Cueto – Pimple-faced teenager runs in front of your car, “Watch out, Mister! Johnny Cueto is falling back to earth!” You stop short and Johnny Cueto falls in front of your car.
Matt Palmer – Thud! That was Matt Palmer falling on top of Cueto.
