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Finally, the Red Sox promoted Nomah’s heir apparent — Zandah Bogats!  Johnny Pesky and Ted Williams’s frozen head said, “Allaka Xander!” and poof a direct descendant of Cahl Yahstremski, Nomah and former top prospect, Harvey Jod, who died tragically in a parking lot incident, appeared.  Drafting a hard A-voweled hitter makes as much sense for the Sox as drafting soft O’s for the Twins:  Joe Mauer and Justin Morneau; they still must rue the day they lost out on Joe Charboneau.  But, you know, you can’t spell Xander Bogaerts without Red Sox, and he’s got bat and range, to boot.  So, here’s looking at you, Bogaerts!  Went there, wrote that — Xander Bogaerts fantasy, that is.  Now Xander’s here to Bogaert the Red Sox shortstop job.  There’s a chance he simply platoons this year.  If he’s only used against lefties, his value will be severely diminished in redraft leagues.  My guess is he’ll play shortstop vs. lefties, and play some third base vs. righties with Middlebrooks grabbing pine occasionally.  Obviously, it wasn’t a great sign last night that he was benched vs. a righty, but it was just one game.  I’d grab him in all leagues because his bat is that good.  Think of a Puig-type splash at shortstop.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Travis d’Arnaud – 0-for-3.  The Mets announced d’Arnaud would take over as the primary catcher after Buck missed a few games for the birth of his child.  Isn’t there some kind of paternity leave laws to stop this?  Where’s Gloria Allred when you need her?  And that’s a sentence I never thought I’d write.  So, Buck went from prospblock to screwed and now that d’Arnaud is the Mets catcher, I’d grab him in deeper leagues.  He has solid power (22+ HRs over a season) and shouldn’t completely kill you in batting average.  He was in the Blue Jays system and ofttimes compared to Arencibia, but with a better bat.  Bee tee dubya, don’t say ofttimes in conversation, you’ll be wedgied.  In keeper leagues, he’s a must-own.  He could be on par with Carlos Santana, as early as next year.

Marlon Byrd – 2-for-5, 2 runs and his 20th homer.  According to our Player Rater, he’s been about as valuable as Shin-Soo Choo and much more valuable than Alex Gordon, Fowler, Jennings, Cespedes, to name a few.  This Byrd you cannot cage!

Dillon Gee – 7 2/3 IP, 0 ER, 7 baserunners, 9 Ks.  I just picked him up in one of our leagues, which makes no sense whatsoever.  He shouldn’t be on waivers in any leagues, let alone a 14-team one.  Rudy’s owned Gee for the better part of two months (and might’ve benched him in some match-ups) and has 62 2/3 IP from him and a 2.01 ERA and 1.09 WHIP.  If you can’t hold that in every league, you have serious ADHD.  Take a pill, it’s affecting your life.

Kyle Gibson – 3 2/3 IP, 4 ER.  After the game, he was optioned to the Twins– Oops, I mean he was optioned to the minors.  Tomato-tomato.

Mike Trout – Sat out yesterday with a tight hammy.  Angels are calling him day-to-day.  They might just be texting him, not sure.

Albert Pujols – Officially shut down for the year.  When I was a young boy with a wispy lip brow, mother told me a healthy Pujols produces crap.  She was wrong.  That was the only time.

Mark Trumbo – 2-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 29th homer and his 3rd homer in as many games.  He’s held it together a bit better this 2nd half than previous ones, but he’s still batting .242 overall and .225 post-All-Star break, so there’s that.

Aramis Ramirez – 1-for-4, 2 RBIs and his 6th homer and first since June 26th.  Even a broken clock is right twice a day, and is day-to-day all other times.

Kolten Wong – 2-for-5, 1 run and 2 steals.  For Wong’s sake (not sure why, but that made me laugh) and all other rookie position players, you should give them a week after you’ve grabbed them before reevaluating.  I know, there’s not much time left, but you got Wong (damn, made me laughed again) so hold Wong (ha!).

Yadier Molina – 4-for-5, 1 run, 1 RBI.  Don’t count Molina out of the batting title race just yet.  (BTW, if you’re counting Molina in or out of the batting title race, you gotta get out and see the sun more.)

Jon Jay – 1-for-4, 2 RBIs and 2nd game in a row with a homer.  We got ourselves a full-blown case of the hot schmotatoes!

Jeff Manship – 5 IP, 5 ER in Philly.  You think Manship would know that Colorado built this pitching staff…They built this pitching staff for when the Rox are on the road!  They built this pitching staff…They built this pitching staff for when the Rox are on the road!

Troy Tulowitzki – 2-for-3 and his 21st homer.  They built this pitching staff for when the Rox are on the road!  Sorry, that’s stuck in my head now.

Carlos Ruiz – 2-for-4 and his 3rd homer, now hitting in the two hole and batting near.350 in the last week.  In fact, the Phillies lineup is all moved around.  I call that Ryno-plasty.

David DeJesus – Traded to the Nats for a player to be named later.  The player to be named later is zyngawf_532398.  At least that’s their Words With Friends username.

Jordan Zimmermann – 5 IP, 8 ER.  JZ hasn’t looked that bad since Kingdom Come.

Wilson Ramos – 1-for-3 with his 8th homer.  Hitting near .325 in the last week with an RBI in every game but one.  Ramos a bailar en schmotato de caliente.

Jeff Samardzija – 9 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 5 Ks.  Sit down, over-the-internet friend, you might suffer from Samardzijaphrenia.  Symptoms include benching Samardzija when he pitches well, starting him when he pitches poorly and lots of muttering to yourself.

Nate Schierholtz – 3-for-4, 2 runs, 6 RBIs and 2 homers (17, 18).  Hitter-Tron also likes him for the next few days.  I know that because I looked at it, then disregarded it and dropped him so I could activate Desmond Jennings.  NOOOOOOOOOOOltz!  Why do you torture me Fantasy Baseball Overlord?  Did I not bring you back a Chipwich when you said you wanted a sweet?  Did I not?!

Donnie Murphy – 2-for-4 and two solo homers.  He seems to do nothing for weeks then has a huge game out of nowhere.  I suppose it’s the luck of the Irish.

Junior Lake – 2-for-4, 2 runs and 5 for his last 8 as it looks like he’s coming alive again.  Lake not-so-placid — amiright?!

Angel Pagan – Expected back September 1st.  When the Vatican’s chimney expels twelve smoke rings, Angel Pagan will be ready to take over the world with a scary-looking albino.  Hey, don’t shoot the messenger, Dan Brown wrote it.  If you’re relying on Pagan to return to save your team, I’d consider joining a football commenter league.  Pagan will be a name to grab if he comes out hitting.  If he comes out missing, he’s just another name on the waiver wire trash heap.

Matt Moore – Said he felt good playing catch.  Aw, that’s heartwarming.  Did Joe Maddon also pat him on the head?

David Price – 5 IP, 2 ER, 12 baserunners, 6 Ks.  He just didn’t have his best stuff last night.  He didn’t have his worst either.  He left that to Jordan Zimmermann.

Evan Longoria – 2-for-4 and a homer.  7 more to go!

Matt Joyce – 2-for-3 with his 18th homer and 2nd homer in the last four games.  No matter how hot he gets, he’ll always be platooned, but if you have room to play him against his strong side, it’s worth the flyer.

Matt Wieters – 3-for-5, 2 RBIs and his 18th homer.  That’s his 2nd homer in the last three games and 3rd this week.  Today was also his first multi-hit game all week.  Wieters, you taking hitting lessons from J.P. Arencibia?  It’s okay to hit a line drive once in a while.  Maybe even a ground ball to keep people honest.  That was Abraham Lincoln’s mom’s secret with her boy.  “Abe, I’m gonna hit you ground balls.  It’ll keep you honest.”  Actual statement from Abe Lincoln’s mom’s autobiography.

Jarrod Parker – 9 IP, 1 ER, 8 baserunners, 8 Ks vs. the M’s in O.co.  Obviously, not the toughest of matchups, but it was still a terrific game from Parker, who’s been hit or miss, but in baseball terms those are reversed as to which is positive and negative.

Giancarlo Stanton – 2-for-4 and his 15th homer.  You’re cute when you’re knocking balls out of the park.  Keep being cute, you big oaf.

Donovan Solano – 2-for-3, 1 run, 1 RBI, hitting near-.400 in the last week.  Not much more than an average hitter, but he has been getting the average lately.

Logan Morrison – 2-for-4, 1 run, 1 RBI and has a hit in seven straight games and eight of ten.  Still no signs of power.  (Last homer was July 6th.  Wait a minute, July 6th July 6th?  Oh, come on, get me out of this parenthetical and get me to the next blurb.  I command you, one hundred monkeys on one hundred typewriters that are writing up these roundups!  Ling Ling, now!)

Jose Fernandez – 6 IP, 1 ER, 7 baserunners, 8 Ks, lowering his ERA to 2.41.  At least I think it was lowered.  When your ERA is that low, it’s hard to be sure.   By the by, the first Buy of the year.  Buy Jo-Fer and sell Sabathia (also told you to buy Domonic Brown and Jean Segura — which means at that point they were under 50% owned).  Okay, I’m now going to jump in my DeLorean and travel back 35 years to impregnate your mom so you can call me daddy.

Matt Kemp – Not expected back before September 1st.  I wouldn’t expect him back before September 15th and even then I could see him just playing here and there to prepare for the playoffs.  Then all the people who drafted him and watched him ruin their season can watch him pull a Sandoval in the playoffs to get everyone crazy about him again for next year.

Adrian Beltre – 0-for-2, 1 run, 1 RBI and his 1st steal and a victim of routhenasia.  The steal’s nice and all, but the Rangers scored 16 runs.  How is it even possible to go 0-for-2 when your team scores that much?  Seriously.   Ticker tease!

A.J. Pierzynski – 4-for-5, 2 runs, 4 RBIs and his 14th homer.  Didn’t I ask someone to remind me to pick up Pierzynski for every short schedule day?  I help you, don’t I?  It’s too much for you to drop in the comments a little, “Nice ‘stache, you lothario beast-man!  Oh, and it’s a short schedule day, grab Pierzynski.”

Leonys Martin – 3-for-4, 3 runs, 2 RBIs.  I owned him at one point.  Now I have L.J. Hoes.  Eff me!  Not you, Hoes.

Daniel Nava – 3-for-4, 2 runs, 1 RBI, hitting over .500 in the last week, and I already picked him up in one league.   Now I can rename my team, The Nava-Hoes.

Jon Lester – 8 1/3 IP, 0 ER, 8 baserunners, 3 Ks.  Not an overpowering game K-wise, but definitely didn’t need to register at City Hall as ‘meh’ Lester either.

Randall Delgado – 6 IP, 5 ER, 10 baserunners, 6 Ks.  The Regression Fairies DVR every episode of Glee, they know the guy that makes the best wheatgrass shot in town and they will Hulk-smash your ERA.

Aaron Hill – 1-for-3 and his 9th homer.  Doode’s playing on another world lately.  And that world is called, “About Time You Did Something Sweet.”  It’s in the galaxy, “I Know You Were Hurt, But Still.”

Brandon Phillips – 3-for-4, 2 runs.  We talk a bit about Phillips on the podcast coming later today.  Say the previous line again in the movie trailer guy’s voice and it sounds much more exciting.

Todd Frazier – 1-for-4 and his 13th homer.  How many homers does he need in the last five weeks to redeem himself?  17?  Get crackalack’ing, Frazier!

Francisco Liriano – 7 IP, 0 ER, 6 baserunners, 13 Ks, lowering his ERA to 2.53.  I never had him this year, but that’s because I was too stubborn to pick him up when it looked like he had turned things around.  Regrets, I’ve had a few.  But then again, too few to mention.  I did what I had to do and saw it through without baseball’s anti-trust exemption.

Pedro Alvarez – 2-for-4 and his 31st homer.  He did have 30 when we recorded the podcast and he did hit his 31st on Saturday.  You’ll understand what I mean once you listen to the podcast.

Carlos Quentin – Said he’s 50/50 to return.  Then he shaved his head as Seth Rogen watched.

Ryan Braun – Claimed the urine collector was an anti-Semite.  When reached for comment, Rabbi Schmuley replied, “If chutzpah were cream cheese, Braun could shmear every New Yorker’s bagel and still have some left over for out-of-town guests.”

234 Responses

  1. goodfold2 says:
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    not wanting to be down to only 1 pickup this early in week i didn’t grab frazier yet (i was waiting for him to outperform aramis one more day and i think they had identical lines, 1/4 with homer each); Different owner had no such conundrum since he owned kozma for christ knows what reason (likely due to this being a st. louis league); so now i’m wondering about aramis vs flores? I’m still gonna wait a few days at least though just in case aramis gets something going as he would be gone quick on waivers in 16 teamer if he did heat up at all. frazier’s only had 1 homer (2 or 3 days since actually having a great day, terrible ones inbetween). I did grab ruiz, what with he will actually play 6 days a week instead of the 4 or 5 at most mesoraco will (until hanigan gets hurt again), he moved up in order, and has had 2 great days in a row (6 hits, double, homer).

      • Hank says:
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        @Grey: story bro

  2. Aubrey Plaza's Pillow says:
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    with yet another orphan coming out of the reeds of that sewer shaped river behind my house i’m now in 6 leagues. this one another 12 team h2h. other than homers and rbi’s team is shit in all offense over full season. if this is lineup
    salty (replacing perez)
    freeman (good here)
    kinsler (good)
    lawrie (so, presumably he him all year)
    tulo (great)
    bruce (cool)
    cuddyer (good)
    carp (he starts this guy)
    dyson/bogaerts/shuck picked up by me for upside/steals/runs
    dropped swisher.
    league has 2 utils.
    1. should i drop any of carp/dyson/shuck for blackmon/dickerson/hoes/ruf/a-rod
    2. is my lincecum and papelbon fair for opp’s other cargo/w.chen? If that’s not fair is
    2a. my lincecum and papelbon for other cargo and 1 of putz/rosthenal/avilan/walden fair?

    thanks, these orphan teams need porridge or whatever food starving babies eat (gruel?)

    • CramYourCatcherQuestionUpYourCramhole says:
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      @Aubrey Plaza’s Pillow: Are you taking over a dead beat manager’s team with a month to ago and seriously trying to fix it?

      • Aubrey Plaza's Pillow says:
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        @CramYourCatcherQuestionUpYourCramhole: yep, but it’s actually the 4th team i’ve taken over just like this since july 31st. 1 is a 14 team roto that started off with me in 13th place. 3 different not too deep (under 14 teams) h2h league teams. I was getting too damn angry when i thought my biggest money team (16 teamer where i now am the prospect master, with wong/yelich/bogaerts/cole (february me reading prospectus coming in pants) was actually going to miss the playoffs due to having terrible 2.5 week stretch to end july. You know how real life women make kids to dodge their own problems and end up giving them to their kids; well my emotional baggage needed to be moved to other teams and many, many more players (except Latos, he seems to be on all of these teams)

        • CramYourCatcherQuestionUpYourCramhole says:
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          @Aubrey Plaza’s Pillow: That sounds like a place I don’t want to be.

  3. Aubrey Plaza's Pillow says:
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    chisenhall must be really good at defense (better than rutledge anyway): “The young third baseman entered the game slashing a nauseating .086/.158/.086 over 35 August at-bats (three singles, three walks and no extra-base hits). This was Chisenhall’s first homer since July 13, also the date of his last multi-RBI game.” This guy must sit on the bench and laugh (internally) about how funny it is that he still has this job.

  4. Dani says:
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    Saunders at A’s
    Danks at Royals
    Rusin home vs. Nationals

    Would you start any? None?

    Thanks

  5. jason batteiger says:
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    dyson should really be the king of sagnof. I guess he isn’t because when you coined those terms, he was barely playing at all. this dude is way cheaper than raj, easier to find, near useless for anything but steals, and gets more per at bat than anybody i’ve ever seen.

  6. Prezi says:
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    Woah, you really cant spell Xander Bogaerts without red sox…. Mind : Blown!

    And damnit, i dropped my wong after two days.. if anyone touches him, im gonna explode!

    Oh, and ADHD.. My favorite kendrick song…

    • Prezi says:
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      See gareth… Thats how you fit everything razzballatarian into one comment… Take notes, furrball!

      • CramYourCatcherQuestionUpYourCramhole says:
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        @Prezi: Ha

      • Grey

        Grey says:
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        @Prezi: Good to see you dropped the Hand of Gaudin username, I had nightmares from his last start vs. the Marlins for three days… Speaking of which, Gaudin will grab your Wong for you if you need it…

        • Jack Full O' Hate says:
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          @Grey: me too, it’s like he was in drag for the past couple of months

      • gareth says:
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        @Prezi: prezi

      • gareth says:
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        @Prezi: is

      • gareth says:
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        @Prezi: a

      • gareth says:
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        @Prezi: jerk

      • gareth says:
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        @Prezi: oh, and that douchy term you used: “razzballatarian” sounds like some political militant terrorist subdivision. Teheran would obviously be the leader of this group. In this scenario prezi would be the suicide bomber. Hopefully.

        Ps: by using all those words in one paragraph on the internet, the CIA is now tracking both our movements. You’re welcome!

  7. Lines says:
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    Top shelf shit, Grey. Still kicking myself for dropping Jo-Fer waaay back in April, after his first few rough starts. But hey, there’s no abuse like self-abuse, amirite?

    Any thoughts/inside info on Garza? Because, to the layperson, it appears he has been hot Garzbage since going to Texas. I know he’s still striking batters out, but he’s given up 4 or more runs in 4 straight starts. Maybe Eric Sogard’s wife got in his head? Sucks for her, because she seems nice, and Garza’s head seems like it would be an awful place.

    How bad does he have to suck in order to be droppable in a 12-team H2H league (which doesn’t count wins)? He’s a name, he’s got a track record, but since relocating to Arlington he’s been what some would call “worse,” or even “much shittier” than a whole bunch of guys on the wire. And in the playoffs, name value and a track record don’t count for anything.

    I’m not ready to do anything drastic, I’m just curious what you (and JB) see that I don’t.

    • CramYourCatcherQuestionUpYourCramhole says:
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      @Lines: It wouldn’t be drastic if there’s a whole bunch of guys on the wire that are much less shittier, as you say.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Lines: Thanks! HA re: Sogard’s wife… No one messes with a beauty queen! I’d consider losing him, depending on who you’re grabbing to replace him…

      • Lines says:
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        @Grey: I’ll probably add a spare OF’er, at least until Trout’s wonky wheel is back in order.

        What’s your take on Danny Salazar going forward? We only have a small sample to look at, but it might stay small if the Indians are really intent on “limiting his innings” for the rest of the year. That said, his/the Tribe’s schedule down the stretch is pretty favorable. I’m not planning to keep him for next year, so all I’m worried about is his value ROS.

        And yes, I read JB’s pitcher profile post, but I’m curious what you think.

        Thanks, as always.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          I think his stuff is filthy, but there’s gonna be some 4 1/3 IP, 3 ER games with 6 Ks… I don’t think he’s gonna go deeper than the 6th inning for most games… No problem…

  8. Quentin says:
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    I’m a big Wong fan. I admittedly have Wong Fever.

    Jump on Wong before someone else? Would be replacing LeMahieu… (NL redraft, need SBs)

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Quentin: I’d grab Wong (hehe)

  9. bossmanjunior says:
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    Last few starts: @CHW, vMIN, @LAA, vPIT, @TB, @KC, vLAA

    So that’s something …

    • bossmanjunior says:
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      @bossmanjunior:

      Sorry, meant to be reply to Garza comment

      • Lines says:
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        @bossmanjunior: Yeah, his schedule looks solid down the stretch, which is why I haven’t dropped him yet. But his bad starts over the last 4 included games against Milwaukee, Oakland (in O.co), and 2 against the Houston. Those are all pretty favorable matchups, so I’m wondering if his schedule going forward should be the deciding factor.

        Thanks for the reply, and the info. I hate trying to figure out a starter’s schedule. All that counting to 5 gets old, fast.

  10. TobiasFunkeAnalRapist says:
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    Drop Venable for Schierholtz? Either is getting dropped once Belt clears waivers… Also drop Ryan Zimmerman for Middlebrooks or Aramis Ramirez? I’m about sick of him and Alex Gordon. Keep up the good work.

  11. Mr. Rickey says:
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    Who do you like better ROS – Gee or Garza?

  12. What round do y’all think Alberto Pool Holes will be drafted in next season?

    • @Malicious Phenom: Keep in mind in our keeper league 90 players are off the board at the start of our draft (10 teams 9 keepers each, for those that hate to do math)..(hehe)..

      Right now I have the #2 pick, but it could be the 3rd or 4th..No chance to get the #1 after my stupid team decided to wake from its season long slump and stomp dude with the #1 pick last week..ugh..

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Malicious Phenom: 3rd in 12 team, will depend on news in spring training too

  13. Dubbs says:
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    Drop Jim Johnson for Rex or Kevin Gregg?

  14. The Strolg says:
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    Is there a term for when you go to pick someone up off of waivers and the picture of the dude scares you to the point that you just can’t hit the confirm button? The dark circles under Vargas’ eyes…Jordan Schafer looking like he’s still 16…Bloomquist’s beady eyes…etc.

    • Sniff Test says:
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      @The Strolg: I wonder what those players would think when we ponder such things while looking at them on our ipads while taking a dump.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @The Strolg: Ha…. Not yet there’s not… There is smugshot, but that’s slightly different

    • Fungazi says:
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      @The Strolg: Doumit Demon-eyes

  15. Jerk says:
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    “Buy Jo-Fer and sell Sabathia (also told you to buy Domonic Brown and Jean Segura — which means at that point they were under 50% owned). Okay, I’m now going to jump in my DeLorean and travel back 35 years to impregnate your mom so you can call me daddy.”

    At one point or another you’ve recommended every player in the majors. Stop jerking off to your own photo.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Jerk: Sorry you drafted Rutledge, I know the frustration

      • matt says:
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        @Jerk: @Grey: lol

  16. BTDRNKS says:
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    Drop Markakis for Scheirholtz?

  17. Ollie says:
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    Definitely suffering from Samardzijaphrenia. Some nasty things were said to the computer screen last night. The fact that I started Zimmermann didn’t help.

    After last night, what are your thoughts on starting him Saturday in San Diego?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Ollie: Gotta start him in SD

  18. Z says:
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    It was the best of times, it was the… BLURST of times!?

    • CT Old School says:
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      @Z: I was thinking the same thing.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Z: HA

      • Aubrey Plaza's Pillow says:
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        @Grey: you stupid monkey!

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Ha

          • Z says:
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            @Grey: See! Not only always bilking you for fantasy insight. Enjoying the pop culture repartee!

  19. Sniff Test says:
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    I too have to activate Jennings…would you drop Bonafacio, Ruf, Yelich, Bogaerts or BJ Upton? I need HRs and RBI…in a close battle for lead in steals.

  20. L-Boogie says:
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    Votto and Jo-Fer for Miggy? No-brainer, right?

    • L-Boogie says:
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      @L-Boogie: I offered. He accepted. Miggy is mine and all is right with the world.

      • Aubrey Plaza's Pillow says:
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        @L-Boogie: sick deal for you, esp if it’s not a keeper.

    • brick says:
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      @L-Boogie: I would think so, especially with Jo-Fer’s looming shutdown

  21. Goldschmidt On Her Chest says:
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    Ramos, Salty, d’Arnaud ROS?

      • Jason says:
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        @Grey: regarding Ramos. If you give him a full season of AB’s (another 150-200) with similar performance I think he’s a top 3 catcher. (.295, 8HR, 35RBI)

        Correct me if I am Wong. Tanks!

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Ha… Can’t prorate a catcher like that… He could be 8 HRs in 250 ABs and 12 homers in 400 ABs…

  22. Chris says:
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    I have Betancourt coming off the D/L this week. I need to drop a player. Which pitcher would you choose to drop:

    Salazar
    Milone
    McCarthy

    Thanks Grey!

  23. The Thumb says:
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    Haren at CHC
    Kzar at LAA

    Who’s the better stream for today?

    • CramYourCatcherQuestionUpYourCramhole says:
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      @The Thumb: Haren

  24. Jon says:
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    Start Fowler (@ PHI, Cloyd) or Victorino (@SF, Vogelsong) today?

    Also Smoak (@ OAK, Gray) or ARam (vs STL, Lynn)?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Jon: Victorino…. A-Ram

  25. EK says:
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    For H2H pts rank:

    Kazmir vs MIN (14.0)
    Masterson @ LAA (13.6)
    Cashner vs CHC (10.9)
    Jackson @ SD (9.2)
    Gee vs DET (5.4)

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @EK: Cashner, Masterson, Jackson

  26. papasmurf says:
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    Stanton great at home, crappy on the road. Go figure.

    • CramYourCatcherQuestionUpYourCramhole says:
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      @papasmurf: Wow. That’s bad…as bad as Bryce Harper’s righty/left splits.

  27. Gonz0_The_Great says:
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    Currently riding the Jeff Locke regression train (Choo Choo!) and looking to get off.

    He’s at SF later this week, which I would have thought would be a good start for him.

    Drop him for Travis Wood, Bruce Chen, Tom Gorzelanny, Jose Quintana, or Dillon Gee?

  28. Gonz0_The_Great says:
    (link)

    How’s everyone feeling about Cobb vs. Baltimore today? He looked great first game back from the DL, but the O’s looked scary last night versus Price.

    • Sniff Test says:
      (link)

      @Gonz0_The_Great: streamonator says bench for this start…I trust in SON.

    • CramYourCatcherQuestionUpYourCramhole says:
      (link)

      @Gonz0_The_Great: I wouldn’t start him in Camden.

      • matt says:
        (link)

        @Grey: I’m throwing him…only because SON was out drinking last night.

  29. Andrew says:
    (link)

    Start Jacob Turner against the LA Dodgers tonight?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Andrew: In most leagues, sure

  30. Alan says:
    (link)

    Do you like Salazar or Wood over any of these SPs?

    Fister, Shields, Haren, Burnett, Holland, Jose Fernandez

    thank you

    • CramYourCatcherQuestionUpYourCramhole says:
      (link)

      @Alan: I like Wood over Fister and probably Haren.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Alan: Wood vs. Fister is a toss up on matchups (and hurts the ol’ groin section)… Wood vs. Haren is similar, lean towards Haren as long as he’s going well

  31. Mike says:
    (link)

    Am I going to keep Xander over Freeman next year? 11 team with 5 keepers per team 6×6 with ops

    • CramYourCatcherQuestionUpYourCramhole says:
      (link)

      @Mike: Pump the breaks.

  32. Wake Up says:
    (link)

    Aramis reminds me a lot of Tom Brady…the Tom Brady that you never heard of…because unlike Peter, Bobby and Greg, Tom Brady would get injured before the filming of every episode…and thusly never make it onto the show…so, much like Aramis, Tom Brady would thusly use this time to bang the everlovingshizzknucklehair right off of Ann B. Davis…

    Thusly,

    Bob Loblaw

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Wake Up: HA… I enjoy your compound word — everlovingshizzknucklehair

      • Wake Up says:
        (link)

        @Grey: from your mouth to Ann B. Davis’ ears…

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          I wish!

          • Wake Up says:
            (link)

            @Grey: Granted!

          • Wake Up says:
            (link)

            @Grey: You ever notice her knuckle hair? You ever think, why didn’t I notice any knuckle hair? Exactly!

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              Knuckle hair is the first thing I notice on women, we’re talking toe knuckle hair right?

              • Wake Up says:
                (link)

                @Grey: oh, I was thinking moose…

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
                  (link)

                  Haha

  33. Bert Ernie says:
    (link)

    Why are you up so early, Grey?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      @Bert Ernie: I’m on a flight back to NY, thanks for noticing…

      • Bert Ernie says:
        (link)

        @Grey: Given the 3.4-oz carry-on regulation, how many containers of mustache styling gel do you have to pack?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          I’m in a designated area for mustaches… Barber chairs and Cedric the Entertainer is telling us jokes…

  34. Harris says:
    (link)

    Spend all day worrying about Salazar’s two starts and Zimmerman gets smashed, Garza can’t figure out a way to get a qs with a 15-1 lead going into the 7th… you think these are signs it might not be my year?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Keep hope alive!

  35. Wake Up says:
    (link)

    That’s hilarious (not even really funny at all) I also dropped Schierholtz (to activate Jennings) but I was lucky enough (stupid enough) to do it before the start of games so I didn’t even get the bomb voyages (bombs voyage?) (bomba di viaggio???)

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Oh, I didn’t get the bomb voyages either (bomb voy-r-gess?)…

      • Wake Up says:
        (link)

        @Grey: the change in emphasis to bomb voyages makes me think of Slim Pickens…which makes me think of saves…which makes me think of SAGNOF…which makes me ask what was the actual purpose of Slim Pickens face?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Slack-Jaw Jones is my favorite name of a person who doesn’t exist…

          • Wake Up says:
            (link)

            @Grey: Pearl Julius Johnson, Jr…

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              Was he in the ABA?

              • Wake Up says:
                (link)

                @Grey: nah, I don’t think she was…

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              I remember Pearl Harbor Johnson, were they related?

              • matt says:
                (link)

                @Grey: I prefer oil can boyd. .epic name

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
                  (link)

                  Ha, yup

  36. Fungazi says:
    (link)

    Which one ROS, 12 H2H with W, L & QS, no givsies-backsies:

    Griffin: Sea, @Det, TB, Hou, @Min, LAA, Min, @Sea

    Gee: Det, @Wash, @Atl, Wash, Mia, @Phil, Mil

    Porcello: @NYM, Cle, @Bos, @Chw, Sea, Chw, @Mia

    Only one with noticeable H/V splits is Gee being bad on the road.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Hah… Gee

      • JFK says:
        (link)

        @Grey:

        Noob question, but which tool do you use to see which starts a specific pitcher has left?
        Thanks!

        • Fungazi says:
          (link)

          @JFK: Oh man, I just do every fifth game. I know that can change pretty quickly though if there’s a rain delay or a start get’s bumped.

          In fact, Gee’s schedule is probably the most unpredictable because of the rookies in the rotation that might get shut down or they move to a 6-man rotation.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Count their starts off a schedule

  37. Wake Up says:
    (link)

    Braun- HA!

  38. Fuzz says:
    (link)

    drop Venable for John Jay?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Sure

  39. Clint (aka Pablo Death) says:
    (link)

    Ryan Braun’s been hanging out with Uncle Leo again, eh?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      He’s Jewish for the jokes

    • CramYourCatcherQuestionUpYourCramhole says:
      (link)

      @Clint (aka Pablo Death): Probably put him in a nursing home to shut him up.

  40. CramYourCatcherQuestionUpYourCramhole says:
    (link)

    Beachy or Cingrani tonight?
    Leaning Beachy

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Go with your gut, but I’d start both, and lean towards Cingrani…

      • matt says:
        (link)

        @Grey: exactly.. hopefully its a point-o-palozza

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Haha

  41. 2 Cups 1 Bran says:
    (link)

    Two questions : OBP/QS league…Would you lose Chris Freeman for Byrd? I am currently riding Rizzo on the bench to be able to plugin Freeman.

    Would you lose Stults, Salazar or Kazmir for Gee?

    • CramYourCatcherQuestionUpYourCramhole says:
      (link)

      @2 Cups 1 Bran: Chris Freeman?

        • CramYourCatcherQuestionUpYourCramhole says:
          (link)

          @2 Cups 1 Bran: Hell, I’d probably lose Rizzo at this point for Byrd unless you’re desperate for HR’s

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I don’t know who Chris Freeman is…Stults for Gee

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I’d hold Johnson (hehe)

  42. Sideshow says:
    (link)

    U like Cobb @ Balt today?

    • CramYourCatcherQuestionUpYourCramhole says:
      (link)

      @Sideshow: See above. No.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      In some deeper leagues, where you need to take the risk, sure

  43. Fireball Feliz says:
    (link)

    JEFF *clap clap clap*
    SHARK *clap clap clap*

    Glad I didnt drop him, very pleased with that start. Who’s the hotter schmo Jay or Nate? I’ve got Jay already but wondering if I should drop him for nate or stand pat

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Schierholtz

  44. danny almonte says:
    (link)

    Looking ahead to Thursday any bats you really like? I have a ton of holes, prob could add 2 bats. Hard to use hittertron on the run

    • CramYourCatcherQuestionUpYourCramhole says:
      (link)

      @danny almonte: You mean any bats on your waiver wire? Because we know who’s available? Junior Lake?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Not sure yet, it’s Tuesday

    • Sniff Test says:
      (link)

      @danny almonte: Darrin Ruf is creeper of the week. He’s probably on waivers. Bonafacio/Dyson either are facing good steals match ups and are mostly available.

  45. Jonah says:
    (link)

    In a h2h 12 team league I traded Miggy, Salazar, & Cliff Lee and in return I got: Trout, Holland, & Bumgarner…worst trade of my life or could I see a major return?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Sounds fine for a redraft league…

  46. Tom James says:
    (link)

    Please. Surely Rabbi Schmuley said: “If chuztpa vus gream cheese . . .

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Ha!

  47. Silky says:
    (link)

    1. Arroyo or Gee for the ROS? Need wins and K’s.

    2. Jay, Schierhotz or Chris Johnson For the next week or two in my UTIL slot? No specific needs. In a H2H points league

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      1. Gee 2. Schierholtz

  48. airweino says:
    (link)

    26 team dynasty league trade offer made to me for my Stanton:

    Gioncarlo Stanton for Arismendy Alcantara, Oswaldo Arcia, and Carlos Martinez

    Besides being one a trade of some of the best first names in baseball, am I getting a good enough return for Stanton?

    Stanton is heading to FA in our league and will get pricey – I have him and Cano becoming FA and probably cannot afford both. All 3 I would get are signed for at least the next 3 years pretty cheaply although I am not sold on Martinez.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I’d want Stanton

  49. Jon says:
    (link)

    Do you think any of these SP can help me down the stretch? I’m going to be losing Harvey and Cashner to innings limits for the playoff run so may need some reinforcements.

    Kelly, Erasmo, Milone, Oberholtzer

    I’d be dropping ARam, I guess, even though I’d like to see if he can be helpful. Decisions, decisions…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Hold for now

  50. Wake Up says:
    (link)

    From the overhead speakers…”Hello. This is your Captain speaking. We are going to need the passenger in 23F to please turn off his electrical device”

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      “Hold on a second, I’m answering comments.”

      • Wake Up says:
        (link)

        @Grey: “Mr. Baldwin..uh…Albright were not really concerned about your “Comments with Friends” please shut down the device or you will end up with your own show…yes, yes we see how big your bicep is…very impressive”

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          “I need to have a word *with* a friend”

  51. Jason Katnip says:
    (link)

    43 Innings above limit currently, should I start or sit:
    Sonnie Gray vs. Seattle
    Ivan Nova vs. Toronto
    Alex Cobb @ Baltimore

    Thinking bench Cobb…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Start, Sit, sit

      • Jason Katnip says:
        (link)

        @Grey:

        Bench Nova when he’s been pretty good though?

    • CramYourCatcherQuestionUpYourCramhole says:
      (link)

  52. Wake Up says:
    (link)

    Wood or Johnson? Dickey is held…and Wong feels unavailable…this is hard…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Too bad the Cardinals don’t have a shortstop by the name of Lotta Fagina…

      • Jack Full O' Hate says:
        (link)

        @Grey: I think Mulva is in their minor league system

        • CramYourCatcherQuestionUpYourCramhole says:
          (link)

          @Jack Full O’ Hate: Dah! I was just going to make a Mulva reference.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          He plays up the middle?

  53. Wetlands says:
    (link)

    Hey Grey! Just was offered this, should I take it?
    I trade away Alfonso Soriano and Chris Sale for Chris Davis and Joe Nathan.
    Thanks in advance!

    • Jack Full O' Hate says:
      (link)

      @Wetlands: If you need saves then I would

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Sure

  54. Goldschmidt On Her Chest says:
    (link)

    Looked but didn’t see if anyone asked. Nova vs jays in 25mins?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Don’t see why not in most leagues

  55. Kratos says:
    (link)

    We starting Ross everywhere today?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I am

  56. JFK says:
    (link)

    Current SPs: Felix, Iwa, Masterson, Beachy, Lackey, Fister, Perez

    Trying to sneak into playoffs – would you drop any of the above for any of the following:
    Cosart, De La Rosa, Gee, Kennedy, Oberholtzer
    Like what I’m seeing from the two young Lastros’ arms…except they pitch for the Astros…

    Shameless plug – join my RCL league, still seven spots left!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I’d hold… Promote the RCLs all you want, fine with me…

  57. ManuteBologna says:
    (link)

    Should I have cut ties with Parnell? I’m still holding him since there isn’t much on the WW for saves. Only saves available are the Lastros committee and whoever is saving games for LAA when they aren’t losing

    I’ve been stubbornly holding Parnell because my others are Chapman Gregg, Brothers, and Frieri

    • CramYourCatcherQuestionUpYourCramhole says:
      (link)

      @ManuteBologna: He’s not coming back this year

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Lose him, grab DLR

  58. Jack Full O' Hate says:
    (link)

    I got Wilmer, Miller and Xander. I hate this crap, I am not going to drop Miller because Boston is having their shizz or get off the pot problem, and I’m not letting Xander go. I have no real question here, just a venting to my fantasy therapist and the really really big support group, ” Hi, my name is Jack and I have an MI problem”

      • Jack Full O' Hate says:
        (link)

        @matt: you’re already here

        • Abdoozy says:
          (link)

          @Jack Full O’ Hate: don’t feel bad.. I’m the guy who drafted Weeks and Rollins, then thought I could solve both problems with Nick Franklin. I’m in the suicidal subsection of the MI support group.

          • Jack Full O' Hate says:
            (link)

            @Abdoozy: I drafted Espinosa and Alcides, lets just say I have kept my distance from bridges this summer

          • matt says:
            (link)

            @Abdoozy: ok so do I drop miller for wong and platoon wong, wang(franklin) xman? Or do I drop wang for wong? I’m sooo confused

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Haha…. I’ve been through all the same guys

      • Jack Full O' Hate says:
        (link)

        @Grey: we all live in the same boat and have really small paddles to work with….

        BTW, I’m finally getting around to your Giancarlo of hip hop, Kendrick, what are the top 5 songs that are must own?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          I’d go with the whole album but Bitch Don’t Kill My Vibe is the easiest song to love…

          • Jack Full O' Hate says:
            (link)

            @Grey: which album, he has three?

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              The Bitch Don’t Kill My Vibe album

              • Jack Full O' Hate says:
                (link)

                @Grey: gotcha, the newest one

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
                  (link)

                  Yup, sorry on a plane and not easy to Google

  59. Abdoozy says:
    (link)

    “Xander Bogaerts” anagrams to “Red Sox Grab a Ten”. It’s a sign, I tell you.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      And Red Sox bat range

  60. matt says:
    (link)

    I tried telling these boys to pitch parker yesterday. the pujols joke make me laugh so hard! I love this blog. I have a question but ill post in the forum later cuz I just woke up. G’Day

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Thanks!

  61. Abdoozy says:
    (link)

    Need a catcher for the first round (2 wk, H2H 6×6 ESPN daily w/ops) of the playoffs now that Napoli has apparently pulled up lame and wasn’t helping much anyway. I have 1b covered but a big hole at C.

    Pena, d’Arnaud, JP, Chooch and Ramos are available. Oh, and Gattis, not that he ever plays. Or should I just shoot myself?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Ramos

  62. Dave says:
    (link)

    I have to drop one in dynasty, which one? Thanks man

    Gaudin, Capuano, Colon, Quintana

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Any of them? Colon

  63. Jay says:
    (link)

    We keep 5 guys. I’m keeping Votto, Longo, Machado, Stanton, and Strasburg.

    Pitching is huge in our league and owners tend to hoard or trade for multiple aces.

    Have an opportunity to move longo for Verlander

    current roster in addition to those above:
    bats – Altuve, Alvarez, Yadier, Zobrist, heyward, Pence, Rizzo
    Pitching – Hamels, Grienke, Lee, HAren, Minor, Ryu, Sonny Gray (streamable spot) RPs- Romo, Papelbon, and Perez

    Take verlander or hang onto Longo?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Hold

      • Jason says:
        (link)

        @Grey: thanks. We’re adding QS and total bases as cats next year. I also don’t pick until the 12th rd. does that change anything or still holding longo?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Hold

          • Jay says:
            (link)

            @Grey: cool thanks

  64. nathan says:
    (link)

    whats the better side of this trade or is it fair? puig & bumgarmer for mccutchen & schrezer?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      mccutchen

    • matt says:
      (link)

      @nathan: I’d want mccutchen side especially if I could keep

      • goodfold2 says:
        (link)

        @matt: scherzer and mccutchen are both better players than bum and puig.

  65. Matt says:
    (link)

    Seriously, jimmy rollins sucks. You like Drew or Alcides over his rickety ass?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Alcides for steals

  66. Silky says:
    (link)

    Do I drop Leonys or Venable to activate Jennings?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Venable

  67. Scott says:
    (link)

    Grabbing Xander to take over/platoon SS (where I have Alexei Ramiriez).

    Drop Byrd or Khris Davis?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Davis

  68. Steve Stevenson says:
    (link)

    IP limit league, looking to make up pts in W and ERA to hold my lead on the league. Currently have 310 IP left (17 ahead of pace) and am holding 6 SP and 6 closers (SV is where I have most to gain, so i made some trades), plus Hunter because I have Johnson. So I’d hbe to ration starts anyway, but wouldn’t mind a streamer spot (for example, for Ross or Salazar today). My bottom 2 SP are Garza and Shark. Despite some recet struggles, they’re both good for K/9, Garza still has solid WHIP and W, and both have some good matchups coming up.

    So, drop Garza or Shark to stream, drop Hunter and hope Johnson keeps the job, or hold?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Drop Hunter

  69. Grey

    Grey says:
    (link)

    THERE’S A NEW POST FOR FOLLOWUPS

  70. gareth says:
    (link)

    For steals at ss: villar, boegarts, alcides or wong?

    • goodfold2 says:
      (link)

      @gareth: wong won’t qualify i’m pretty sure anywhere at SS, but it would’ve been him.

  71. Larry says:
    (link)

    Which one you throwing back next year. I can keep 5. AVG + OPS and W+ QS league

    Pedroia
    Hanley
    Kemp
    Cargo
    Felix
    Bum

    Gracias

  72. Grey

    Grey says:
    (link)

    ******THERE’S A NEW POST FOR FOLLOWUPS*******

  73. Pops says:
    (link)

    Rcl league—would you Drop Napoli for Ramos?

    I have kinsler — Drew — Dozier– Rollins.

    Available are Escobar — Ellis — Gennett–Beckham–Cozart–B Miller–Flores?

    I have Smoak–Francisco–Carter

    Available are –Middlebrooks –Moose–Lind–Nava–Flores and Donnie Murphy?

  74. letsgobravos says:
    (link)

    Prado continues to scorch. Just hit a solo shot. 23 RBIs in the last 30 days and hitting over .370.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Yeah, that’s pretty damn good

Comments are closed.