Hey, Royals, you’re stupid. Call up, Mike Moustakas. Okay, with that out of the way, let’s figure out who Moustakas is and will be. Last year, he spent time at Double and Triple-A. Not at the same time, that would be some Multiplicity shizz. In 484 ABs, he hit 36 homers and batted .322. As they say in Moustakas’ home country, “Wow.” (He’s from L.A.) Then they would throw a glass into the fireplace and spray some Windex. This past year saw Moustakas named the Texas League Player of the Year, which is more prestigious than the Koo Koo Roo Employee of the Year, but only barely. As his skipper said, “(Moustakas) missed the first 16 games of the season and by midseason he was leading the league in all the categories. And where’s Gilligan?!” It’s nice, but what can we expect of Mike Moustakas for 2011 fantasy baseball?
Assuming the peasant Royals get their act together, Moustakas should get a chance to break camp with the club, but will probably be a Mike Stanton in 2010 type call-up. I don’t think we see him until June 1st at the earliest. If he breaks camp with the team, he’ll be a quality sleeper in mixed leagues, 12 or deeper. But really that’s only true because of his position. If he were in the outfield, I’d tell you to ignore him in most mixed leagues. Best case scenario, 50/17/75/.280 in 350 at-bats. Now his extended family in Astoria, Queens would probably say, “Wow.” (Astoria, Queens is in New York. They say wow there too.) Then they would take the Nia Vardalos poster off the wall, wrap it around a rotating shawarma and take turns kissing it. Actually, now that I write that projection it seems on the high side. I’d compare him to Pedro Alvarez in 2010 for power, but he will give a better average. At the age of 22, Moustakas is set to either be the Royals 2nd 3rd base casualty since Alex Gordon or the 1st “Thank God He Didn’t Turn Out To Be Alex Gordon,” 3rd base prospect since Alex Gordon.
How can you go wrong with a guy who sounds like delicious Middle Eastern food?
Throw in the fact that his name looks very much like moustache, and I think we’re on to a winner.
I thought he sounded more like a Rocky Mountain cuisine…. Moose Tacos.
Moustakas (or “moistened” as my iPhone seems to want to correct) is someone that I’m going to have to target next year at some point because I can’t keep Wright in 2012. My question: would you rather draft him and hold onto him, therefore ensuring him a spot on my team (and have him on the bench for a few months) or pick him up later and have a chance at losing him? It’s a pretty competitive 12 man h2h keeper where we keep 4 every year.
@Steve: If he’s half as satisfying as Chili Davis, we’re in business.
@Ben: Nice!
@Eddy: The auto correct drives me crazy. Why can’t you shut that off? Or can you? I wouldn’t want him on my bench.
@Grey:
You can by going to Settings>General>Keyboard. I’ve thought about turning it off several times but I figure it actually helps me more than it hurts. Though I can see how writing entire posts would make you hate the damn thing. Thanks for the advice!
@Eddy: Oh, man. Now that I know how to do it, you’re right, not sure if I want to.
@Grey:
Finally someone understands my constant turmoil! I say leave it on. Think about it like this–how many times have you willingly turned off spellcheck on Word?
Exactly.
@Eddy: Spellcheck would be okay, but this thing changes the spelling when I’m spelling something right, right?
@Grey:
No, it does something even worse.
It assumes what you’re going to write.
Just make sure you don’t accidentally send the message when it auto-corrects. My girlfriend was sending out a text to her friends “who wants to see avatar in 3D?” and it corrected to “who wants an inadequate threesome?”
@Eddy: Yup
@emc squared: That’s hilarious… Did she get any takers?
@Grey:
C Mike Piazza
1B Mike Lamb
2B Cookie Lavagetto
3B Mike Moustakas
SS Callix Crabbe
LF Chet Lemon
CF Chili Davis
RF Daryl Strawberry
DH Tim Salmon
SP Catfish Hunter
RP Mark Hamburger
Tasty-sounding lineup.
@Steve: Chet Lemon with Tim Salmon is a lovely combination.
@Grey: Wait until Clayton Dill gets called up. Then we’ll really have something.
@Steve: Mark Hamburger is actually a son of one of my parent’s friends.
@Stephen: He’s destined for life in the headlines:
http://razzball.com/frank-francisco-closer/
@Steve: Ha! The year before I joined my 20 team league, a manager traded A-Rod for a Potbelly’s sandwich.
@Steve: Hehe
@Grey: And speaking of food, Bartolo Colon looking at a comeback.
And Nats interested in Uggla too, apparently. Imagine him and Dunn on the same team! Oh – I did have them on the same team. Worked out OK.
@Steve: Colon needs a cleanse. Uggla’s a terrible fit for that team and would give the newest post trouble unless he’s traded to the Marlins.
@Grey: Yeah, keeping up with Uggla I was *very* relieved the Rockies considered Uggla “out of their price range.” EY2, here we go!!!