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Oh, Hanley Ramirez is Hanley Ramirez, and a guy that will play a bit bruised giving it his all is a guy that will play a bit bruised giving it his all, and never the twain shall meet.  (I think a “twain” is a train as pronounced by Elmer Fudd.  Don’t quote me on that though.  It could be referring to Shania.  My Google’s broke so I’m shooting from the hip.)  Hanley playing with Pujols’ level of dedication is probably the best shortstop anyone has ever seen.  Hanley as he is now is probably Andruw Jones in five years.  As I’ve said before about Manny, insouciance doesn’t age well.  Hanley hasn’t played since last Wednesday, but for now he’s listed as day-to-day.  Half of me says hold out hope for Hanley to return ASAP.  The other half of me says he has 2 homers and 4 steals this month.  You can probably find that production elsewhere in the last two weeks.  Since Hanley is undroppable in most formats, it’s all probably moot.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Chris Volstad – 9 IP, 0 ER, 7 baserunners, 3 Ks as he handily beat Carpenter (6 IP, 4 ER, 7 baserunners, 6 Ks) and the Cardinals.  I’ll tell ya what, when the Cards fold, they don’t play.

Jair Jurrjens – Was scratched with a bum knee.  Was he sleeping in a cardboard box?

Erick Aybar – Shut down for the season.  Back date that to March.

Josh Hamilton – I know it’s a broken record at this point, but he’s so not coming back before the playoffs….he’s so not coming back before the playoffs.

Derek Holland – 3 2/3 IP, 4 ER, 9 baserunners, 1 K as Holland got clogged.

Craig Breslow – Got the save while Andrew Bailey sat on the bullpen bench and I sat on my couch waiting for the stupid A’s announcers to say why Bailey wasn’t closing, which they never did.  I grabbed Breslow in one league because I’m a saves addict.

David Murphy – 5-for-5.  Seriously, pick him up.

Chris Davis – Hit his first home run of the season.  On September 20th.  Ouch.

Felix Hernandez – The M’s are talking about limiting him to only two more starts even though the schedule has him getting three more.  But if the Comatose Mariners Fan wakes, tell him the M’s are saving Felix for the playoffs.

Jason Kubel – Expects to start today for the first time since last Wednesday.  If he doesn’t return today and returns on Wednesday, he’ll be Kubelated.

Joe Mauer – Will have an MRI on Tuesday then the Twins will say something like, “He should be fine in a few days,” then Mauer will miss most of the rest of the season after the Twins clinch.

Jimmy Rollins – Not close to returning.  I’d like to say he’s going to be underrated in next year’s drafts, but I get the feeling Rollins is taking cues from Glass Chipper for the 2nd half of his career.

Jose Valverde – Went for an MRI yesterday.  For what it’s Wuertz, I dropped Valverde in one league.  In related news, Coke looks like the pickup since he got the save yesterday.

Coco Crisp – Out for the season.  Hey, Coco felt a pop so I guess that’s cheerio.

Yuniesky Betancourt – 4-for-4, 3 RBIs and his 16th homer.  Betcha can’t guess who is 6th in homers for all shortstops in the major leagues.  Okay, was kinda easy because I put it in Betancourt’s blurb.  Blurb this!  Geez, 16 homers is a lot nowadays for shortstops… I have a fun new rule.  We allow steroids for only one position a year.  It’s a secret which position it is and then they announce it in October.  Be like an XFL infusion into MLB.

Wilson Betemit – 3-for-5 as he stays hot, hitting over .400 in the last week.  Do what you do, friend.

Zack Greinke – 6 IP, 5 ER.  Yeah, you would’ve been better off drafting Brett Myers.  Now go stick your head in the oven.

Will Rhymes – 1-for-5 and his 1st career homer.  Hate to be the rain on the Rhymes’ parade, but where the eff is the speed?!  He had 22 steals in the minors this year in 95 games, he has zero in 43 major league games.  It’s rhyming and stealing!  Not rhyming and sitting on first!

Rick Porcello – 5 1/3 IP, 5 ER, 12 baserunners, 2 Ks as the Royals got feisty and Porcello went mushaboom.

Alex Avila – 3-for-4, 3 RBIs and a homer.  He’s hitting over .400 this week (only 4 games) and he’s been known to get hot for a week or two at a time.  Guess how much time is left in the season?  You’re good today!

Curtis Granderson – 2-for-3 with 2 homers and a steal.  Here’s a random prediction:  Grandy comes up huge in the postseason and gets overrated again next year.

Mark Teixeira – He’s back in the lineup!  He went 0-for-5.  Sad trombone plays.

Gavin Floyd – Left yesterday’s game with tightness in his shoulder.  Sorry, that was me sticking needles in my Floyd voodoo doll.  He’ll probably be shut down for the year.

Bobby Jenks – According to Ozzie, Jenks will only pitch another inning or two this season, if that.  Sounds like he’s effectively shut down.  I’d grab Sale, Thornton and Putz, in that order.  Or STP, for you fans of rock acronyms.

Chris Carter – 1-for-34 in his major league career.  At 6-5 and 231 lbs., you’d think the splash would be a bit bigger.

Bud Norris – 6 2/3 IP, 2 ER, 10 baserunners, 6 Ks.  His walks have been getting a bit out of control.  13:20 BB:K in the last three games.  Well, whatevs.  He gets the Pirates next.

Brian Duensing – 6 IP, 3 ER, 10 baserunners, 6 Ks.  Yeah, you would’ve been better off with Duensing the last two months instead of Greinke.  Back to the oven!

Danny Valencia – Hit his third homer in four days.  Yes, you should grab him.  Yup, right now.

Drew Stubbs – 1-for-4 with a homer and 3 Ks.  That’s so Stubbs!  He’s like a puppy trying so hard to please.  Someone shine a flashlight on 2nd base today so we can get some steals.

Joey Votto – Hit his 35th homer yesterday.  Dusty said that he’ll give Votto a day or two off once the Reds clinch the division.  I said, why can’t the Cards play better so Votto has to keep playing?  Dusty said, do I know you?  I said, I was the one driving the car when Mark Prior egged your house.  Dusty said, you made me remove my toothpick for that conversation?

  1. ‘morning Grey. Out of Coke, Breslow, and Perry, did I pick the right order for pickups for those of us desperate for saves?

  2. Christopher says:
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    Yeah, with Hanley “undroppable” he’s on the bencjh. Another struggling star is Brandon Phillips, something like 1 for his last 41. Does he fall into the Hanley category of “drop him for the hot hand these last two weeks”?

  3. Child Please says:
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    12-team H2H 6×6 (OBP, QS)
    We have a moves limit of 50 (I am at 45)…Would you use one of your moves to add Valencia over Walker?

  4. big o says:
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    @Child Please:
    save your moves to win the QS and K ‘s categories

  5. Wilsonian says:
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    Couple of different leagues here, so it might look a bit redundant in parts…Rank for tomorrow (and possibly for the next week and a half-ish):

    Scherzer v. KC or Cueto @ Mil?

    Hensley, Rodney, Koji, white powdery susbtance?

    Bruce, Guillen, Betemit, Chris Johnson, Valencia?

    Tejada or Betancourt?

    Bruce, Guillen, Murphy, Ethier?

    Thanks, as always man…

  6. BSA says:
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    Hanley has been pulling a Reyes ’09 in my SS spot.
    It was nice of Steve to drop Granderson – I can use a balanced outfielder this week.
    I weathered last week’s blah team performance – lets go “averages” and work in my favor this week – I got Al Koholic coming up my butt.
    Valencia and Betemit have paid dividends already to help me keep pace.

  7. Erock says:
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    Hey Grey — I need some keeper advice. Should I keep Braun, Longoria, and Teixeira, which will cost me my 1st to 3rd round picks, or Buchholz, Daniel Hudson, and Filthy Sanchez/Morrow, which will cost me my 13th, 15th, and 16th rounders. Apologies if this is a ridiculous question. Thanks.

  8. Barry Heanbag says:
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    Hey Grey, can you please rate these three for streaming today…

    Volquez @ Mil
    Pelfrey @ Fla
    Lannan vs Hou

    Thanks.

  9. Tony says:
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    @Erock: keep the studs, if you throw them back you’re maybe getting 1 of them back? they’re all essentially 1st rounders and you’re getting one of them in the 2nd and one in the 3rd…. no brainer…. hudson, sanchez, and morrow will all be there later.

  10. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Enrique: Morning! Coke, Sale, Perry, Breslow…

    @Christopher: Yeah, lose him.

    @Child Please: Agree with O…

    @Wilsonian: Scherzer… Hensley, Rodney, Koji… Betemit, Valencia, Guillen… Betancourt… Murphy, Guillen, Ethier…

    @BSA: Nice… You still in 2nd?

    @paddytwotimes: Wow… Thanks for the heads up!

    @Erock: Agree with Tony.

    @Barry Heanbag: Pelfrey, Volquez…

  11. ThE sHiT says:
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    @Grey: Do you ever bench a stud like Prince? He’s been pretty bad last couple weeks. I need someone that is producing in his spot.

  12. ThE sHiT says:
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    @Grey: BTW, good morning! Very gloomy today, but still a beautiful day…

  13. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @ThE sHiT: I wouldn’t bench Prince ever.

  14. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @ThE sHiT: Yeah, I slept late with the gloom. Morning to you too.

  15. ThE sHiT says:
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    @Grey: I figured that. That jackass can break out any freakin day. I hope it’s sometime during these last 2 weeks. My opponent in the finals has CarGo, Holliday, Mauer(hope he’s out a while), Heyward, Prado. So, his hitting is stacked. Need all the offense I can get. My team started off 14/37 the week……….but 13 of those hits were singles! I see Zobrist is coming back to life, 2 straight multi-hit games with a double. I’m still kicking myself for drafting Prince instead of Cabrera, and Zobrist over Cano. The guy who drafted after me took the 2 guys I didn’t, and rode in 1st place the whole season. But, he got rolled in the 1st round. Damn fool was talking mad trash the whole year and I told him, it doesn’t matter where you are now, it’s the final standings that count. He posted a message yesterday saying I was right… Sorry for the long semi-rant, I got a lot on my mind.

  16. Eddy says:
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    @Grey:
    Hey Grey, which SP do you like for tomorrow?

    Niese @FLA (got rocked for 7 ER last time)
    Nick Blackburn vs CLE (same as sanchez)
    Carlos Carrasco @MIN (very risky but he shut down MIN on the 11th)
    Drabek vs SEA (David Pauley is on the other end. Easy win?)

    Btw, nothing’s coming to me but I’m sure you can use this video of a perv kitty in a much better way than I ever could:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HGX1HHNUUag

  17. Eddy says:
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    @Eddy:
    And the “same as sanchez” comment next to Blackburn, ignore it. I had previously written Anibal’s start vs the Mets as suggested by borderline starter, but it’s Sanabia.

  18. Eddy says:
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    @Eddy:
    And Niese was rocked by FLA, not his last start.

    I gotta start proofreading my damn comments.

  19. bsa says:
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    @Grey: yes. 9 back. Al is 4 behind me.
    my sp rotation is thudson, king felix, waino, big z, and cahill. I can gain points in w and k.

    we’ll see.

  20. sucklingduck says:
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    Hey everyone, what are ur thoughts on chopping up pots. There’s a couple of people in my league who threw a fit as soon as it got mentioned. I was just interested in ur guys take on it.

  21. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @ThE sHiT: Ha… No problem. Good rant.

    @Eddy: Ha… Nice video. Blackburn…

    @bsa: Thudson – ha!

  22. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @sucklingduck: All rules and such should be decided in the preseason. I’d be annoyed too.

  23. My lead is toast in my league…so sad…but gotta keep fighting…Good Spot starts with Baker and JDeLaRos?

    Is Latos going to bounce back? that last start was ugly.

  24. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @XNadyMen: Can’t start Latos right now. I’d start the other two.

  25. bsa says:
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    I know, you haven’t trusted him all year. He sure was good for the WHIP and ERA.

  26. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @bsa: Yeah, his numbers were saying he was lucky and his last month has shown that.

  27. BSA says:
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    @Grey: That being said, 16 wins and respectable Ks, ERA, and WHIP made for a pretty good ride. Is he a guy that should be owned 100% probably not. Even now my finger is on the trigger for dropping him. Which means my sticking with him may burn me in the end.

  28. Turkey Teeth says:
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    In the championship here. 7×6 Daily H2H, (R, HR, RBI, AVG, OBP, S, K) and (W, L, SV, WHIP, ERA, K) and we’re allowed two moves per week. I have one left. Who do you see adding the most value to this team:

    C: Montero
    1B: AGon
    2B: Brian Roberts
    SS: JJ Hardy
    3B: Jhonny
    OF: Grandy, Braun, CarGo
    2UTIL: Stubbs, Tabata
    BN: Eric Young, Kelly Johnson

    SP: Cahill, J Chacin, Kershaw, Niemann, Price, Gio Gonzalez, Jaime Garcia
    CL: Uehara, Valverde, Soriano

    We’re only allowed 2 RP slots, so I’m using Uehara in my SP slot to give me 3 closers. Opponent has two closers, so Valverde isn’t hurting me yet.

    Due to our move limits, I haven’t had the ability to drop Jaime or Niemann. I already used one to replace Rollins.

    So…the question is who upgrades me the most? What I’m pondering is:
    Carlos Ruiz for Montero
    Valencia over Peralta
    or
    Betemit over Peralta
    Chris Perez over Valverde

    Also, would dropping Garcia be the right call, regardless of who I pick up (unless it’s Perez)?

  29. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @BSA: Eh, I’d hold him.

    @Turkey Teeth: Perez over Valverde… Valencia over Peralta would be my moves. In a redraft, you can drop Garcia, but not sure you have the moves for it.

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  30. stynyr says:
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    I’m in the finals of my H2H league. The finals are 2 weeks long. Should I bench Latos his next start?

  31. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @stynyr: I think you have to.

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