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The Winter Meetings concluded day two yesterday at the Gaylord National Resort & Convention Center.  Seen at the Gaylord so far was the best free agent starter (Rich Hill) signing, one of the best closers available (Mark Melancon) signing, and Curt Schilling protesting that the Gaylord Resort should not be allowed to marry.  “Is it going to start calling a lobby ‘Bobby’ and adopt a baby too?”  That’s Curt Schilling with his own special brand of crazy. With Giants’ signing of Mark Melancon, I’m saddened to remember all the good times I had over the past few years with the Giants’ bullpen.  Here’s those times condensed into a single run-on sentence, “I can’t believe I drafted Santiago Casilla, ugh, maybe I’ll back him up with Sergio Romo, oh man, that hurts just as bad, fine, I will grab Hunter Strickland, and he’s killing me too.”  Scene.  Yeah, those times, in theory at least, are behind those owning the Giants’ new closer, Melancon.  For 2017, I’ll give Melancon the projections of 4-1/2.26/0.97/58, 42 saves in 62 IP.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw this offseason for 2017 fantasy baseball:

Eric Thames – Within hours of the Brewers releasing Chris Carter, the NL home run king, they signed Thames, the Korean home run champ.  In alcoholic terms, Miller Lite to Soju & Hite.  To say this is puzzling is an understatement.  Thames was signed for $15 million over three years and they could’ve had Carter for $8 million.  Was Carter great?  Well, compared to Thames, I’d say, yeah, he was great.  As we’ve seen over the last few years, Korean power numbers translate about as well as kimchi to an Iowan with a bleeding ulcer.  “My doctor says I need to lay off the bibimboopies.”  That’s the Iowan now.  Jung Ho Kang hit 40 HRs in KBO, 15 here; Byung-Ho Park went from 53 HRs to 12 HRs and Hyun Soo Kim went 28 HRs to six. So, the bridge from 40 homers in Korea maybe too far for Thames to cross.  In 2017, I’ll give Thames the projections 58/17/64/.225/5 in 435 ABs.

Derek Norris – Acquired by the Nats.  The NL East got its second d’Arnaud catcher, only this one spells his name, Der-No. For 2017, I’ll give Norris the projections 51/16/58/.237/6 in 458 ABs.

Edinson Volquez – Signed with the Marlins. Rather than trying to find someone with electric stuff to replace Jo-Fer, they just went with someone whose name sounds related to electricity.  For 2017, I’ll give Edinson the projections 11-12/4.04/1.33/142 in 185 IP.

Jeff Mathis – Signed with the Diamondbacks.  This signing came after the Diamondbacks non-tenderized the boeuf Welington.

Joaquin Benoit – Signed with the Phils and could be their new closer. Hopefully, he is so he gets his own rooting section in Philly with fans dressed up in metal ball costume for the very non-family friendly, Benoit Balls.  I imagine the fans dressed as Jeanmar Bergman’s Wild Strawberries and Neris’ Buellers will have a say about Benoit as the closer.  I’ll give Benoit the edge and the projections of 1-2/3.65/1.31/43, 15 saves in 42 IP.

Matt Holliday – Signed with the Yankees. In the past month, I’ve compared the Yankees to your dad right after the divorce from mom. They were done with A-Rod and Te(i)x and ready to date some players twenty years their junior. Then, on dad’s way to the coffee shop to meet you, he hears Cat’s in the Cradle, and by the time you get there, he’s found all these women his own age, he’s swiped right on, and is talking about making a real connection. Holliday is the right-swipe after Cat’s in the Cradle. For 2017, I’ll give Holliday the projections 64/22/74/.261/2 in 422 ABs.

Steve Pearce – Signed with the Jays. Thus far the Blue Jays’ offseason moves can be described by their fans as, “I hope there’s better moves to come.” As of right now, Pearce is the Jays’ starting left fielder and best hitting outfielder.  Gulp.  For 2017, I’ll give Pearce 54/18/62/.274/3 in 405 ABs.

Carlos Beltran – Signed with the Astros, after choosing between the Yankees, Red Sox and Blue Jays.  The teams interested in a player like Beltran has become so predictable.  Surprised the Rangers weren’t also in the mix.  So, Beltran is back with the Astros, and still looks like Ricky from My So Called Life.  Maybe Beltran will get 27+ homers again and maybe he’ll open-mouth kiss George Springer.  For 2017, I’ll give him the projections 68/24/75/.276/1 in 465 ABs.

Rich Hill – Re-signed with the Dodgers.  *Dodgers seeing other free agent starters still available Ivan Nova, Derek Holland, Jason Hammel, Jorge de la Rosa, Doug Fister*  “Rich Hill, are you sure all you want is $48 million?  We can throw in pickup games for your kids with Magic.  Want Scully to announce your daughter’s bat mitzvah?  You’re not Jewish?  Want Scully to convert you?  He can bris the junk out of you!  What else can we do for you?”  Without looking at Google, can I bet someone that Hill is not represented by Scott Boras?  Boras would’ve been like, “Wait, so you’re saying the best starter free agent after Hill is Jeremy Hellickson?  Okay, Rich, we’re not accepting anything beneath $200 million over ten years.”  Speaking of Hellickson, he accepted a $17.2 million one-year, qualifying offer and Hill’s deal averages $16 million over three years.  Any ideas of who represented Hellickson?  You guessed it!  Boras.  So, Hill re-signs with the Dodgers, and, unless he gets injured immediately and stays injured for three years (which isn’t out of the realm of possibilities with Hill), you have to love the deal for the Dodgers and fantasy.   For 2017, I’ll give Rich Hill the projections of 14-5/2.74/1.03/144 in 125 IP.

Yoenis Cespedes – Re-signed with the Mets. Mets needed Yoenis, that number three hitter.  Now to get that leadoff hitter, two-hole hitter, cleanup-type, run producer, guy who can turn the lineup over and pitcher with two good arms.  As for Yoenis, he’s become a reliable, low-end, number one outfielder for fantasy — hits 27-32 HRs, steals 3-7 bases, gets a .270-.290 average, drives in runs and replies in the affirmative any time someone asks, “Yo, know what I mean?”  For 2017, I’ll give him 82/30/93/.277/5 in 589 ABs.

Matt Joyce – Signed by the A’s.  The most A’s signing ever?  Well, I don’t know, they have a ton of ‘most A’s signing ever’s.  I saw someone write an article saying the A’s just added a breakout slugger.  Yeah, Beane’s done it again.  Another guy that can’t do anything but hit one type of pitcher for the occasional home run.  Crazy to think the A’s haven’t been better with all the great things Beane’s done.  Woo-boy, how about that Yonder Alonso?!  No one quite like him, except Joyce, Mark Canha, Smolinski, Ryon Healy…Okay, no one quite like any of these guys except the six that are on the A’s.  The emperor has no clothes, but he wears an A’s hat, hits the gym during home games and was played by Brad Pitt in a movie. For 2017, I’ll give Joyce 48/17/59/.235/2 in 398 ABs.

Jaime GarciaBraves traded for him.  Braves have been active this offseason, huh?  Already signed Colon and Dickey, which I said sounded like an after-shower spray Lorenzo Lamas would endorse.  Well, now they’ve added a guy that sounds like what Lamas says into the mirror, “Jaime.”  For 2017, I’ll give him 8-11/3.88/1.28/125 in 150 IP.

Jon Jay – Signed with the Cubs and will platoon with Albert Almora. Since Theo Epstein was an American Studies major at Yale, it was a natural fit to sign The Federalist.  Look forward to his next signing, Coco Crispus Attucks.

 
    • Malicious Phenoms says:
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      @Ralph Lifshitz:
      lol, hold a rugby in da air with Ralph Lifshitz.

    • Roger Podacter says:
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      @Ralph Lifshitz: Pete Rock can’t even help this guy sound half decent.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Ralph Lifshitz: Why doesn’t he write Razzball a theme song?!

      • Roger Podacter says:
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        @Grey: Back in the day when they didn’t have Razzball,
        Grey’s sarcasm had em’ comin out the ass ya’ll.
        Bad news? go and watch him spin it like a fast ball.
        Pretty much every reference is gettin’ past ya’ll.

        *Kool Herc Pose*

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Nice!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Ralph Lifshitz: Oh, snap, I never realized Ralph Lifshitz is Ralph Lauren, you’re such a prep

      • Ralph Lifshitz

        Ralph Lifshitz says:
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        @Grey: Did I just win the Coastal Elite-Off?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Yeah, you won, because I’m going to a book store to hear Gloria Steinem speak

          • Ralph Lifshitz

            Ralph Lifshitz says:
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            @Grey: Wait, I just lost! (Quickly looks to see what authors are in town, “Damn, Dave Barry AGAIN!!)

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              HA… Dave Barry on Thursday, Dan Shaughnessy on Friday, Ted Williams biography writer on Saturday

              • Ralph Lifshitz

                Ralph Lifshitz says:
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                @Grey: I hate the Curly Haired Boyfriend so much. He’s such a junk writer. Someone needs to take his HOF vote.

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  He’s the biggest putz… I hate him

                  • Ralph Lifshitz

                    Ralph Lifshitz says:
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                    @Grey: He’s barely a journalist

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Agreed

  1. Clogged Rosterman says:
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    Ryon Healy’s no good? I’ve owned him, but I’ve never actually seen him play…

    • Ralph Lifshitz

      Ralph Lifshitz says:
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      @Clogged Rosterman: IMHO he’s the best of that group and has a chance to be a solid 1B once Chapman is up.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Clogged Rosterman: Good’s relative… He’s all right, but, I mean, he’s not the future of a franchise

  2. Duda Want to Build a Snowman? says:
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    Hey Grey! Following up yesterday’s keeper trade chat (12 team roto, keep 7 forever at +$3 annual inflation), I’ve received two offers so far for my $30 Kershaw. My goal for this league, like any self-respecting Razzballer is to win the championship this year, so I want to best position myself to do so. Thoughts?

    1. My $30 Kershaw [plus dropping $11 Franco to free agency] for his $10 JD Mart + $12 DeGrom (he has Carrasco at $11, but wants to keep him ideally)

    2. My $30 Kershaw [plus dropping $11 Franco to free agency] for his $23 Blackmon + one of $11 Archer, $19 Strasburg, or $6 C-Mart

    My other definite keepers are $33 Rizzo, $28 Betts, $11 Story, $6 Khris, $3 Moncada. If I were to do one of these give 1 get 2 trades, I’d have to drop an $11 M Franco / $4 Ozuna – type guy to free agency.

    Thanks!

      • Duda Want to Build a Snowman? says:
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        @Grey: And if not JD/Carrasco, then Kershaw, correct?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Yeah

          • Duda Want to Build a Snowman? says:
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            @Grey: THanks!

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              No problem

  3. Ante GALIC says:
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    Grey!

    Nice write-up and very insightful read on the signings especially concerning their fantasy potential.

    a. The continuation of yesterday’s case continues today!!! You were wrong so far but you could still be right (confusing right?). It would appear that a neighbor gave my staff member’s number to the wife. It’s complicated and now the neighbors are being interrogated by the sheriff. Results of that interrogation upcoming.

    b. So your mock draft from yesterday looking better and better from a fantasy standpoint especially re: the Melancon pick. So only one conclusion to draw, dawg….Just wing your official drafts putting up a hail Mary!!

    Cheers,
    Ante

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Ante GALIC: A. Wow, now this is getting juicy! B. Ha, yup

      • Ante GALIC says:
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        @Grey: Grey!

        a. Getting juicier. Still not over. The saga continues tomorrow.

        b. What’s the Chadian version of Shogun? (‘Member? it’s like yesterday!)

        …..https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sh%C5%8Dgun_(miniseries)……

        c. One of our drivers has the surname Kriga, we call people by their surnames here. So, the story goes that in the 1600s a German explorer on his way to Namibia stopped off in Chad. His name? Krüger (or Krueger). But of course with the presence of French already in Chad and knowing Frenchies how they can’t (to this day) pronounce the German ü without simply saying a long ‘e’ (spelled ‘i’ in French because the French are French), Krüger (Krueger) became Kriger. And then with time the ‘er’ of Kriger became Kriga….Hence, we have….Richard Chamberlain is Krüger (aka Kriga) in

        Kanem-Bu Warrior for the Kanem-Bornu Empire

        ….https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kanem%E2%80%93Bornu_Empire….

        Cheers,
        Ante

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Who was a Thonburg!

          • Ante GALIC says:
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            @Grey: Grey!

            All I need to do is write a 600-paged novel based on this lie of a premise. I’m sure that’ll work out. But Baron de Montesquieu did the same thing with his famous ‘Lettres Persanes’! Basically, all fabricated. He had an understanding of everything Islam had to offer when he wrote the book, the cultural differences between Sunni and Shiite etc. It was all the rage when it came out.

            https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Persian_Letters

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Salman Rushdie just Liked this comment

  4. Duda Want to Build a Snowman? says:
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    Forgot one! Maybe more of a joint Grey/Ralph question, but for 2017 and beyond . . .

    $11 Benitendi or $6 Khris (2017 values, +$3 / yr, keeper forever)

    Thanks!

  5. Mrs. Featherbottom says:
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    Nice! I think Thames was picked up because of his glove. Brewers also just acquired Travis Shaw for Thornburg.
    Hope your early-winter has been fun!

    • Duda Want to Build a Snowman? says:
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      @Mrs. Featherbottom: Almost Moncada time (re: Sox)!

          • Ralph Lifshitz

            Ralph Lifshitz says:
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            @Grey: Side effect of the of the amphetamines. They were meant for gorrillas with low energy.

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              I used to love Gorillaz

              • Duda Want to Build a Snowman? says:
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                @Grey: Great band!

                Also, how many times have we heard this about Panda? I will always love him, but 2 months into the season he’ll be enormous again. Just don’t see him holding up the Moncada clock.

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  Yeah, he yo-yos his weight more than Oprah

                  • Ralph Lifshitz

                    Ralph Lifshitz says:
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                    @Grey: He’s the Luther Vandross of baseball.

                    He just needs to stay thin enough to be traded. He looks good though.

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      I think he looks better fat, like Vandross

            • Gigorilla says:
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              Hey now……
              You referring to the brothers in the zoo. Free G’s don’t need no zippers.

              • Grey

                Grey says:
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                Ha!

      • Gigorilla says:
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        If Thames hits a little bit, and Arcia gains some muscle, the Crew’s infield could be very interesting

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          I like Arcia, Thames could be an interesting flyer late, but likely nothing in anything shallower than 15-team leagues

          • Gigorilla says:
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            Back to your original point on Carter — yes we thought letting Carter go and the $$ to Thames made no sense or Cents.

            Boy wonder Stearns gets a C- so far.

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Yeah, he’s doing puzzling moves as far as I’m concerned

      • Mrs. Featherbottom says:
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        @Grey: I think it works – 2 prospects and a cheap solid glove at 3B. I see Villar as the everyday 2B, Scooter getting moved, and maybe H. Perez moving to 1B. The Braun deal is what everyone is focused on now. I’d love to see him moved for someone like Archer, though I doubt that would ever transpire.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Don’t love it for Brewers, Shaw’s pretty whatever and Thornburg was under team control and a 12+ K/9 closer

          • Mrs. Featherbottom says:
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            @Grey: Yeah, I’m not a big fan of Shaw, but the Brewers had a terrible slew of 3B last year. I see moving Thornburg as a way to start grooming Bickford for a closing role. They’ve moved 3 closers this year, which is kind of crazy.

            • Mrs. Featherbottom says:
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              @Mrs. Featherbottom: On another note, I’m really hoping they chase Eovaldi.

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Yeah, and SAGNOF, but Thornburg was already a great closer, they could’ve went Villar at 3B and Scooter at 2B… Feels kinda like a push for the Brewers if not a step down

              • Mrs. Featherbottom says:
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                @Grey: Scooter can’t hit lefties, and Villar was a ridiculous error machine at 3B (12 errors over 42 games at 3B) for the team with the most errors in baseball. Shaw on the other hand had 16 (over 105 games). I see it as a trade we all forget about in the next year unless if one of the two prospects, Dubon, continues to play well.

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  Gotcha

  6. Tweak says:
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    I’m not sure that I’d throw Healy in with that group of others quite yet. He’s still got upside and can function at 3B for the time being.

    Acquiring Beltran and McCann for the Astros makes a lot of sense; that team seems to need a bit of veteran leadership. Another solid arm and they’re looking really good in the West. Maybe they’ll move on Odorizzi?

    The move that I don’t understand is Cespedes going back to the Mets. Maybe it is just money, but I don’t get the sense that they can put it together and really win.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      @Tweak: Hope the Astros avoid the Archer landmine for their own sake…. Mets just need their pitching to come around, they reached World Series with no hitting

      • Tweak says:
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        @Grey: Yeah, maybe it is just a fluke that at least two of their starters have bone spurs in their elbows at the same time. If that story were applied to the Sawx or Cubs (pre-Theo), it would almost make too much sense. The Metropolitans should be able to win with what they’ve got. There’s no reason that with guys like Cespedes, Bruce, Conforto, Grandy, Cabrera and Reyes in the lineup, they can’t generate some runs. I think it is more of an organizational and management issue than anything.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Agreed, the Mets find ways to lose… The lovable Mess!

  7. Dr. Kenneth Noisewater says:
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    Can’t wait until the Pirates re-signing of Ronny Cedeno makes the list.

    I was literally looking up Ingmar Bergman and Wild Strawberries yesterday. I want to watch The Seventh Seal (I bought a pair of shoes named and designed after the movie…..I have a problem).

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      You bought sneakers designed after The Seventh Seal? Are you serious? That’s the best thing I will hear today and it’s only 8 AM, link please!

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Damn, dude, you seriously won today with that shizz… Those are amazing! I want a pair just to say I have Ingmar Bergman sneakers… From a person with an MFA may I say, Fanny & Alexander is his best film

          • Dr. Kenneth Noisewater says:
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            @Grey: Ha, thanks G. I figured they were too plain for your taste. I love them, only about 150 pairs made because the manufacturer screwed up and made the rest with a blue king on the heel.

            I’ll have to check that one out, The Seventh Seal is the only one of his I’ve seen, and that was forever ago now.

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              F&A is like 240 minutes long, but it’s amazing…. How did you get them if only 150 were made? Just luck?

              • Dr. Kenneth Noisewater says:
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                @Grey: Some guy on eBay, they came out about 3 or 4 years ago now. Paid over retail, but ended up talking to the dude about the movie and he hooked me up some.

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  Ah, gotcha, didn’t even realize the release date was a while ago… How much you pay, if you don’t mind me asking

                  • Dr. Kenneth Noisewater says:
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                    @Grey: $200, that included shipping. There are more pairs on eBay now for $300.

                    Now that I think about it, I spend at least that for any pair of Diadora or Adidas NMD.

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Damn, that’s not bad at all! I want me somes for $200!

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      I’m buying them!

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Got em!

                    • Dr. Kenneth Noisewater says:
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                      Ha! Fo reals? If you are serious, Asics run a little snug so you know.

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      I’m never wearing them!

                      Kidding, I hope they fit

                    • Dr. Kenneth Noisewater says:
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                      Haha, that’s so awesome! Noisey spreading the love!

                    • Dr. Kenneth Noisewater says:
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                      People never do wear them, that’s why they are available. Psychos. I wear my ish!

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Yeah, I’m gonna wear them too, prolly gonna workout in them even

                    • Dr. Kenneth Noisewater says:
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                      Now that’s pushing it, ha. And remember, these were running shoes back in the 90’s….may not be the best for that these days.

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      I might’ve just bought my first impulse purchase in 15 years… Do you see what you do to me?

                    • Dr. Kenneth Noisewater says:
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                      But come on, those shoes are dope. That nubuck is top notch.

                      I don’t think they make shoes in “canoe” size FOH.

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      Ha!

                    • The Hack says:
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                      they are dope but yes my canoe size feet limit me.

                    • Dr. Kenneth Noisewater says:
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                      You need some New Balance 997 or 998. Can find a lot of them online, awesome shoe. I have a couple and love them.

                    • Grey

                      Grey says:
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                      You trying to get me divorced? I can’t buy anymore sneakers for a good six months

                    • Dr. Kenneth Noisewater says:
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                      That was for FOH and his clown shoes. NB 997 and 998 are just amazing shoes, no collabs needed. They would have bigfoot sizes.

                    • The Hack says:
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                      @Dr. Kenneth Noisewater: I need to hire you as my show consultant…I pay in hugs and advice. Id say hookers but your girl might not be cool with that…or will she?

                    • Dr. Kenneth Noisewater says:
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                      As long as said hooker is into equal rights I may have a chance. How about hugs and drugs? I’m in.

                    • The Hack says:
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                      @Dr. Kenneth Noisewater: well Ive heard my hugs have a addictive quality to them

  8. Woolly the Mammoth says:
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    The Scully references in the Rich Hill blurb are gold, nice work. Speaking of Hill, I’m trying to talk myself out of keeping him, but not having much luck (10 team, keep 20 players forever, no values).
    I can keep eight pitchers out of Marcus Stroman, Dylan Bundy, Cole Hamels, Jameson Taillon, Taijuan Walker, Danny Salazar, Lance McCullers, Michael Pineda, Rich Hill and Matt Harvey. Thoughts?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Thanks! Why talk yourself out of it? He’s solid… Will be better than at least four of the pitchers you listed

      • Woolly the Mammoth says:
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        @Grey:
        Because of his age and how much time he spent on the disabled list last season. I suppose I should keep him, but over who?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Pineda is a wild card, not worth aggravation with those choices

  9. Scott Kimmel says:
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    Grey

    I made a trade offer and wanted to see if you thought it was fair:

    I give up Duvall, CarGo (COL), Quintana
    I get: Trey Turner, Betances and Hendrcks

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Sounds decent

      • Rufus T. Firefly says:
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        @Grey: Other guy will say no…Turner is too sexy.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Yeah, for sure

      • Scott Kimmel says:
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        Greywhat are your thoughts on me giving up Duvall for Hendricks?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Hold

          • Scott Kimmel says:
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            ok I have guys I want to move (quintana, Madson, Duffy, Votto, Cargo, Marte, Gurriel, Cain, CUeto, Snell) just not finding a match for any of them

  10. Prince George says:
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    Hi Grey, great site and thanks again for all you do. I need a closer and have an offer on the table to get Betances. What are the odds he stays as New York closer next year? I keep hearing Chapman to NYY but not sure how serious this is. Thanks.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      I think the Yankees will get someone and make Betances the 8th inning man, but still lots of time in the offseason

  11. The JoGarza says:
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    Hey Grey,

    Have made a couple of trades this offseason in my 16-team dynasty. OBP and QS instead of their counterparts. What do you think?

    C-Beef or Tom Murphy
    1B- Goldie
    2B- Zobrist
    3B-Lamb
    SS-None
    CI-C.Santana
    MI-Schoop
    OF-Pederson
    OF-Mazara
    OF-Dahl
    OF-Ellsbury
    OF-Jankowski
    UTIL- VMart
    UTIL- Ian Desmond

    SP- Degrom, Salazar, Hamels, Gausman, Skaggs, Guerra, Conley
    RP- Britton, Barraclough

    Relevant MiLB that could make an appearance in 2017- Gallo, B.Zimmer, Cody Reed, Yohander Mendez

    We will draft 5 MLB players in March, where I expect to take a couple more relievers, couple bench bats

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Ells, V-Mart, Santana, Zobrist, getting old… I love Dahl, Mazara, Pederson… Your pitching should be all right if Salazar and deGrom are okay, which they’re not right now, but can be…. Team looks like a contender, but some possible pitfalls as mentioned

      • The JoGarza says:
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        @Grey:

        Thanks! We’re looking to land an OF/SP combo by gutting our farm a little bit.

        Finished 3rd in the standings last season, but got knocked out in the quarterfinals.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          No problem

        • Ralph Lifshitz

          Ralph Lifshitz says:
          (link)

          @The JoGarza: The Reds Preview has been updated to include Cody Reed. Thanks for your patience.

          • Grey

            Grey says:
            (link)

            Thanks, Rapper!

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              Ralpher?

  12. Big Odio says:
    (link)

    Jay? Norris? Volquez? Thames? Benoit? Matthis? Pearce? Holliday? Joyce? Garcia? This has to be the most blaaaaaaahhhhhhh ever in a rundown.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      No major free agents until 2018

      • The Hack says:
        (link)

        @Grey: your Hill blurb summed it so well. I cant get excited over baseball so Im going to go on the snapchat for ladies with validation issues

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          Haha…. Like you know how to use SnapChat!

          • The Hack says:
            (link)

            @Grey: I do! I have a homie who still thinks he’s 21 so I get the 411 on these things. Wait, saying 411 just dated the fuck out of me. If you asked an 18 year old what 411 was would they be able to answer?

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              I think they might know but would’ve never used it

              • Big Odio says:
                (link)

                @Grey: as in “I’ve heard of a phone book but never actually used one “

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  Yup!

  13. Great, now Peter Brand is prancing around here at Gaylord wearing the Emperor’s new suit…and Schilling is trying to squirt ketchup on him…but, his dinosaur’s saddle keeps falling off…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      That’s actually Carl Everett dressed as a dinosaur

      • @Grey: From an old interview with Carl…

        Yes. And it’s a spiritual one. In Revelation, 13 times it refers to Satan or anti-Christ, beast, to dragon. All right. To me, that’s very profound, because the analogy only works if it’s a real analogy. If dragons are mythological with no bearing on reality, then God just compared the deceiver of the world, the murderer from the beginning, Satan, to a mythological, make believe creature. And that, to me, is not consistent with the character of God to go, “This creature, Satan, who wants to kill you, is kind of a like a make-believe dragon.” And that is the most powerful argument for me personally, because it shows that dragons were in fact real, or else the analogy that God used on Satan failed. And God wanted very clearly to point the lethality of Satan. Satan is a creation who is carnivorous. He wants to kill you. If dragons were in fact real, then that analogy of Satan just doesn’t work. And that points to dinosaurs existing with man. And when dinosaurs do exist with man, the theory of evolution is demolished.

        For the win!

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          So great, Everett needs to get in Trump’s cabinet

          • @Grey: He is, after all, the one who showed me that butterflies taste much more like flies than they do butter…

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              Such a truism!

        • Big Odio says:
          (link)

          @Wake Up: so what you’re saying is game of thrones is a historical dramatization

  14. Big Odio says:
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    I started watching Atlanta again. Did you ever finish it?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Yeah, was solid… Monatgue episode was best one

      • Big Odio says:
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        @Grey: hell yes it was. Baby’s mama didn’t get it because it was the whole episode. The mickeys ad was awesome!

        • Grey

          Grey says:
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          So great!

  15. Big Odio says:
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    Sale to the sox for moncado and kopesch? Cue the ralph

    • Grey

      Grey says:
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      Nice!

      • Big Odio says:
        (link)

        @Grey: I have a feeling ralph will not approve

        • @Big Odio: Makes a lot of sense for both sides…

          • Big Odio says:
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            @Wake Up: right now it does but I have concerns with sale. We’ve all been waiting for the knife to drop on that arm. Paging Dr. Freeze? I also like the trend of developing from the inside especially with hitters. Develop your hitters sign your pitchers. But I may be wrong. My initial reaction gives it a thumbs down

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Ralph is a homer, he goes the way the organization goes

          • Ralph Lifshitz

            Ralph Lifshitz says:
            (link)

            @Grey: If they dealt Benintendi I would have freaked. It’s a solid deal, the fact that the secondary pieces were Basabe and Diaz is a huge win.

            They needed to do this deal. It’s not like I haven’t been critical of the Sox in the past. I hated the Panda and Hanley signings, and didn’t love Price, though I may have talked myself into it. Hated the Manny deal too. I love being called a homer here and a contrarian by the homers.

            • Grey

              Grey says:
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              It’s still early, Benintendi for Jose Abreu?

              • Ralph Lifshitz

                Ralph Lifshitz says:
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                @Grey: You shut your mouth Albright! I’ll be a White Sox homer if they do that.

                • Grey

                  Grey says:
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                  Dave Dombrowski wants to trade Benintendi for Tulo, you know he does

                  • Ralph Lifshitz

                    Ralph Lifshitz says:
                    (link)

                    @Grey: Hari Kari for Ralph

            • Tweak says:
              (link)

              @Ralph Lifshitz: In the end, I’m surprised they moved Moncada, but unless he turns out to be a HOF-caliber player, his value really couldn’t be higher than with the hype he’s carried this past season.

              Dombrowski hasn’t totally sold the farm yet, but moving Moncada, Kopech and Basabe certainly takes some top value out. Now, the expectations will be high, but that’s the market the Red Sox are in. If the team is a wreck this season, they can sell some pieces and rebuild the farm. If they’re solid, then all should be good.

              Maybe they believe in guys like Marrero or Chavis. Maybe they plan to get Josh Harrison or sign Justin Turner. Or maybe the Panda really is showing them something this offseason and can hold down the fort until Devers arrives.

              • Big Odio says:
                (link)

                @Tweak: he sold the farm in the three major deals he’s done to get two starters and a closer all three with ? marks

                • Ralph Lifshitz

                  Ralph Lifshitz says:
                  (link)

                  @Big Odio: Who doesn’t have question marks? Prospects? Do they not have question marks?

                  • The Hack says:
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                    @Ralph Lifshitz: you sound like my mom right now. Who doesn’t have problems? Everyone gets depressed? Everyone has problems with their kids? Are you one of those polly-ana baseball fans too?

                    • Ralph Lifshitz

                      Ralph Lifshitz says:
                      (link)

                      @The Hack: Hahaha no but to say a multi-time all star starter has questions but that prospects do not is kinda silly.

                      Also your mom and I sound a lot a like. If Mrs. Lifshitz leaves me after I get caught in the bathroom with a picture on Beni can you introduce us?

                    • The Hack says:
                      (link)

                      your assumption that I dont question prospects make you even more like my mom. I dont need to state the obvious that applies to all prospects, I’m just questionng the arm. I hate to say it but Im rooting for a TJ in Sale’s near future just to be right

              • Ralph Lifshitz

                Ralph Lifshitz says:
                (link)

                @Tweak: It’s Panda, Marrero is a utility guy. The 3B depth is Devers/Dalbec/Chavis.

                Now go get Aroldis (won’t happen)

                • Tweak says:
                  (link)

                  @Ralph Lifshitz: Ah, well, I forgot about Dalbec. My bad. The only reason that I questioned the Panda is that they still have a hole at 1B (unless they pull out the big money and land Mitch Moreland *gasp*). Were they to, say, sign Turner, they could move Sandoval to 1B and hopefully slow his descent.

                  • Ralph Lifshitz

                    Ralph Lifshitz says:
                    (link)

                    @Tweak: I figure Moreland is the LHB to replace Shaw.

            • Big Odio says:
              (link)

              @Ralph Lifshitz: I like beni too but he is a college player where moncado needs more time to polish things out. Tough to compare them right now.

              • Ralph Lifshitz

                Ralph Lifshitz says:
                (link)

                @Big Odio: Not really, he’s a year older and they came through the same levels. Moncada has been a pro longer.

                • The Hack says:
                  (link)

                  @Ralph Lifshitz: isnt Moncao younger?

                  • Ralph Lifshitz

                    Ralph Lifshitz says:
                    (link)

                    @The Hack: 13 months

  16. Duda Want to Build a Snowman? says:
    (link)

    HOLY SHIT – Red Sox trading Moncada etc. for Sale (!!!).

    As a Moncada owner, WTF does this mean?!

    2B eligibility? More likely to be in MLB earlier? Any change to projections?

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Crazy!

      • Duda Want to Build a Snowman? says:
        (link)

        @Grey: If Toddfather is allowed to steal whenever he wants, you’ve got to think Moncada will pretty much have the universal greenlight (I hope!) . Maybe he’s also more likely to reach leadoff or 2 hole earlier… Tim Anderson, Moncada, Abreu, Toddfather?

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Moncada!

          • Duda Want to Build a Snowman? says:
            (link)

            @Grey: GET SOME BACITRACIN THE STOVE IS HOT!

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              HA!

        • Ralph Lifshitz

          Ralph Lifshitz says:
          (link)

          @Duda Want to Build a Snowman?: His superior on base ability will make him a no brainier for a leadoff guy. He’s going to play second too. Knowing the way the White Sox aggressively promote he should break camp with them. Value jumps a lot IMO.

          • Duda Want to Build a Snowman? says:
            (link)

            @Ralph Lifshitz: Works for me ($3 for 2017 in my keep forever)! Makes a lot of sense too – 2B elig, no reason not to go to top of lineup early on, probably will break camp, less pressure to instantly succeed . . . maybe more of a green light since it’s a rebuilding team (and non-speedster Frazier can even get 10-15 SB).

            He and Tim Anderson will be a fun MI pair.

              • Big Odio says:
                (link)

                @Ralph Lifshitz: but who well have they developed their hitters especially once in the majors. They aren’t the orioles

                • Ralph Lifshitz

                  Ralph Lifshitz says:
                  (link)

                  @Big Odio: Are you drinking?

                  • Big Odio says:
                    (link)

                    @Ralph Lifshitz: how well have white sox

  17. Test Kitchen says:
    (link)

    Grey,

    Franco or Polanco?

    Hold onto Franco if I’m ok in the OF? Or two big of a gap to pass up Polanco?

    Thanks

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Polanco

  18. I’m seconding the New Balance from above…

    They are racist…but SO comfortable…like Ann Coulter’s chin…

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Haha… Nice!

  19. nick the dick says:
    (link)

    Ralph this new Sick Jacken album Psychodelic is dope as hell. Beats are really good

    • Ralph Lifshitz

      Ralph Lifshitz says:
      (link)

      @nick the dick: I’ll peep it. You see that Smoke DZA Pete Rock?

      • nick the dick says:
        (link)

        @Ralph Lifshitz: I saw the post, didn’t listen yet but will. The beats better be awesome! You see there’s a new DITC album?

        • Ralph Lifshitz

          Ralph Lifshitz says:
          (link)

          @nick the dick: I did I liked the song you posted Fat Joe’s droopy eyelids and all.

          DITC was always about the beats + Big L. Feel like he’ll be sorely missed.

          The Pete Rock jams are very good. I like Smoke DZA some don’t so judgement is out on that part.

          • nick the dick says:
            (link)

            @Ralph Lifshitz: For sure it’s not the same without L, but I also love me some Finesse and OC so hopefully there’s some jams on there. I haven’t even listened yet

            Smoke Dza seems pretty middle of the road but he’s listenable, he’s not garbage. As long as he’s not god awful over Pete Rock joints then it should be dope.

    • Dr. Kenneth Noisewater says:
      (link)

      @nick the dick: I like new music

  20. Ralph Lifshitz

    Ralph Lifshitz says:
    (link)

    Things you need to know about Kopech.

    He calls himself Thor the Sequal
    He’s dating a Real Housewifes daughter. A really crazy Atlanta housewife at that.
    He smacked talked Keith Law when Law questioned he validity of reports that he threw 105.
    Broke his hand punching a teammate in spring training
    Has a PED suspension already
    Is allergic to shirts
    He’s awesome and is a great prospect I own all over.

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Sounds like a guy I can get behind, how far away is he?

      • Dr. Kenneth Noisewater says:
        (link)

        @Grey: Sounds like Ralph’s already behind him. Burn.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Haha

        • Ralph Lifshitz

          Ralph Lifshitz says:
          (link)

          @Dr. Kenneth Noisewater: so good! His buns are made of steel, you can tell he squats…

      • Ralph Lifshitz

        Ralph Lifshitz says:
        (link)

        @Grey: Due to the punching incident it delayed him a bit. He was the best pitcher in Arizona with Martes and Honeywell close behind.

        Could be up in the pen this year with his K/9 13+ stuff, could be in the White Sox rotation next year knowing them. Huge strikeout stuff, nasty triple digit fastball sits 96-102 (some reports claim he’s hit 105), inconsistent slider that flashes plus, throws a change that can look plus, throws it from same arm slot as his fastball. He’s a classic heat-throwing Texas douchebag….what’s not to like.

        • Grey

          Grey says:
          (link)

          Wow, I’m excited now

          • Ralph Lifshitz

            Ralph Lifshitz says:
            (link)

            @Grey: Yeah I traded for him last week in one league. Leaving the AL East helps too

            • Grey

              Grey says:
              (link)

              Can’t hurt

  21. Rufus T. Firefly says:
    (link)

    I’m concerned the first day of Hanukah is on Christmas Eve this year. Is Trump responsible for that shit?

    Thanks,
    Rufus

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      I blame Starbucks and their holiday cups

  22. ryanoger says:
    (link)

    I’m catching up on my off season Grey write ups, this one was great man, thanks!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Thanks!

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      Nice!

  23. Bye Felica says:
    (link)

    The Yankees are a joke. WTF are they signing seniors to play the outfield? Unless he’s going to DH

  24. Spyre says:
    (link)

    Hey Gray!

    I didn’t get the Chris Carter / Thames swap either. As a Toronto fan, I saw the AAAA Thames first hand. Combine that with trading Thornburg, what the heck are the Brewers thinking? Even I can do a better job as GM. I won my fantasy league 2 years ago so I obviously got the

    Anyway who are your 6 keepers from this lot? Rounds 1-6, can keep anyone forever.

    Trout
    Arenado
    Rizzo

    F. Lindor
    Trea Turner (?)

    Bautista (ugh)
    Cutch (ugh)
    Danny Salazar
    Danny Duffy

    I don’t like either Danny an “ace”, but there won’t be any better pitchers on the board by round 6, cuz all top pitchers are kept…. SP is highly valued in my h2h (Scherzer had most league points last year). I’m worried if I don’t keep 1, my rotation will be even worse this year than last.

    Thanks as always! I’m impressed you keep this up year round, it definitely fills that baseball void in my life during the offseason.

  25. Reno 911 says:
    (link)

    “Jai! Me Dickey y Colon!”

    • Grey

      Grey says:
      (link)

      HA!

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