Jake Peavy is due back August 28th. Member when I told you to drop him? Yeah, that was so two months ago. We’re in August, check your Mr. Winkle calender. It’s a brand new day, Sting. We gotta update you when you you have to pick him up, too? (That’s a Royal we since this is just me. Rudy’s in Prague doing spy business. Ooh, I’m a spy, no time for Razzball for two weeks. Okay, Rudy… Or as I shall call you, Bill Clinton.) So what can we expect of Jake Peavy when he returns? Dominance in 30 minutes or less? Probably not. I’d put his line at 7 starts, a 4 ERA and a 1.20 WHIP with good Ks. He’s dealing with a tougher league, but he’s also dealing with guys who don’t know him as well, though he’s also dealing with a shizzy ballpark, unless you’re Gavin Floyd. — Recently overheard convo between Buehrle and Danks, “If I’m not pitching well, and you’re not pitching well. Who’s pitching well?” “Uh-oh, Gavin Floyd!” — With all of the unknown factors happening right now with Peavy — Will he return? Will he be good? Will his robot foot hold up? — It’s worth a flier to grab him because his price tag is way below what he can give you. Just don’t bet too heavily on him. He may have a setback and not show up until October. Anyway, here’s some more players to buy or sell this week in fantasy baseball:
Will Venable – Don’t cha love Padres hitters? They’re like other team’s hitters without the messy HRs, RBIs and Runs to worry about. Venable’s been hot. What, you don’t like hot? I expect you’re going to want to drop Venable by the middle of August, but worth a week grab. (I used to try for the “weak grab” back in college. The girls would retaliate with the “strong slap.” Good times!)
Ty Wigginton – From August 1st to August 30th, give Wiggy one more chance.
Jim Johnson – Sure would be nice to see him get a save so we know it’s even him I should be touting. I mean, I’m pretty sure it is, but ya never know. I’d also be holding Danys Baez too, just in case.
Alex Gordon – Hitting near .300 since his return and he just hit his first homer since April 15th. How’s dem apples?! Yeah, not very delicious. But if you’re hurting at CI, you can do worse. Maybe!
Casey McGehee – Casey McGehee stars in, “The MI That Won’t Go Away,” with Claude Rains. Razzball’s Buy/Sell’s going all noir on yo’ ass! <– You might remember that line from MC Dark Shadows’s most famous song, “Fred MacMurray’s Macking Your Wife.”
Rajai Davis – SAGNOF! Oh, and not just any SAGNOF. We’re talking Bourn-type numbers in a very affordable off-waivers price tag. It’s a steals for clunkers-type deal.
Asdrubal Cabrera – 2 homers and over .400 in his last seven games. When I say, As… You say, Drubal… As… Drubal… As… Drubal… As… You got it.
Neftali Feliz – Guy’s sick, but not sick as in ill, but sick as in healthy. But he’s still just a middle reliever, so I don’t suggest you grab him in every league, but if you need a little relief — hehe — go for it.
Elijah Dukes – If he has a solid final two months, prepare yourself for every fantasy site telling you he’s a sleeper next year, until he’s no longer a sleeper. Cust kayin’.
Matt Lindstrom – We now begin our portion of the program of middle relievers that may be closing by this time next week.
Mike Gonzalez – Soriano could lose the job any second now.
Yusmeiro Petit – Show me a -eiro, named Busta! What, no LONS fans in the Razzpound? Maybe Yusmeiro took the -eiro power from Pineiro, maybe he gets shelled next time out like the latter -eiro. In certain leagues, I’d gamble on Petit (namely H2H ones), but keep your caveats in check.
Ryan Roberts – Johnny, who’s the MI schmohawk behind door number three? Ryan Roberts!!! The crowd looks around, “Should we cheer?” One guy stands up and screams, “I want Clint Barmes to get hot again!” With the help of her granddaughter, an older woman stands, “You and your (bleeping) Barmes! Shut the *bleep* up!” A chair flies. A melee ensues.
Tom Gorzelanny – Don’t let a Cubs fan get in your ear telling you they’ve stumbled on something with Gorzelanny. His solid game was vs. the Reds. Gorzelanny needs to do it for another month before I consider owning him next year.
Randy Wells – Had a 120 IP last year, and he’s already at 120 this year with the minors and majors combined. This has nothing to do with his stuff, but the Cubs should start limiting his innings/skipping his starts soon. Lesser Known Fact of the Day: His middle name is David.
Jarrod Washburn – I’m pretty sure his ESPN ownership numbers and his suddenly poor pitching are directly related. He gets over 50% owned, he gets dusted like Tom Joad.
Gordon Beckham – Let’s get it out of the way right off the bat, I don’t think you should trade him for a bottle of Mad Dog 20/20. I like Beckham. I think he can be solid. But here’s the thing, CBS wrote a cover story on him, ESPN gave him some pub…. (Bee tee dubya, I was the first one to go for the side of the barn title of, Buy It Like Beckham. Since then, I’ve seen Hit It… Break In… and Rake It… Just remember who’s setting the trends on layup titles. Also, take a second and look at that Buy/Sell link. I could sit here and tell you the numbers Beckham’s done since July 3rd, but I’ll let your eyes dance through those stats on your own time.) People are starting to realize how good Beckham’s been in the last month plus (over .400, 4 homers, 3 steals). In one year leagues, has he been that much better than, say, Asdrubal Cabrera? No, not really. Gordon Beckham will be one of my favorites for next year, but this year, he’s still just a rookie trying to get his swerve on while hitting the slurve. If someone overvalues Beckham, fleece ‘em, North Face.