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Last year, Brandon Allen treaded his six-two, two-hundred and thirty-five pound man-gams through Double- and Triple-A before hitting the majors in August.  And by hitting the majors, I don’t mean hitting in the majors.  As Lil Jon once said in grade school, I come correct with my prepositions, okaaaay!!!!!  In the minors in 2009, Allen slashed .298/.373/.503 with 20 homers, cutting his strikeout rate for the 2nd year in a row.  However, that didn’t carry over to the majors, whiffing 40 times in 104 at-bats.  Though, that was a small sample size… that’s what she said! (Stephen broke him down further in his Diamondbacks Prospect Review.)  For Brandon Allen to make an impact in 2010 fantasy baseball, he needs a spot to play.  Oh well, right?  Not so fast, Alex P. Keaton on speed.

What do Chad Tracy, Tony Clark, Conor Jackson, Josh Whitesell, Rusty Ryal and Chris Snyder have in common?  They suck.  They also played 1st base for the Diamondbacks at some point in 2009.  (Mark Reynolds played 28 games at 1st too, but I have it on good authority he wants to play 3rd… Actually, I don’t have it on any authority.  I’m educated-guessing here.  The Diamondbacks would be better with Reynolds at 3rd and Allen at 1st.)  So over the top rope comes the big-boned Brandon Allen.  He should get an ample opportunity in Spring Training to win the job.  If he can break camp with the Diamondbacks, he’ll be a solid sleeper for power in 12 team mixed leagues and deeper at a corner infidel spot.  In NL-Only leagues, he’ll be draftable as a sleeper 1st baseman.  He should provide power, if nothing else.  You’re looking at a 20 homer hitter with a chance for a bit more.  He’ll probably hurt you on average, but what else is new from a Diamondhack hitter?  Windmills were once used for pumping water through primitive irrigation systems.  Maybe the swings and misses are how the Diamondbacks keep the hot tub bubbling in the right field stands at Chase Field.