The Orioles love their ex-Cubbies so they decided to sample some of their Pecan’t Pie rather than just hand the LF job to Nolan Reimold. As with most of these rookies, a lot depends on starting jobs. And Reimold doesn’t have one. Yet. So who’s blocking Reimold? Luke Scott? Who are you, Luke Scott? A 30-something prospect? Luke Scott must’ve called Matt Stairs for advice on how to prolong a major league career that should’ve ended years ago. Go to the DL, Luke. (He’s not there yet, but maybe if we all hold our breath. What Razzballers want, Razzballers get!) Then there’s Felix Pee-ay, who is crap-ay. He was hurt in yesterday’s game. Not to mention, many think his ship has already come and gone for prospect status. If Reimold emerges from this O’s left fielder mess, he’s a slugger who we think could hit for power without costing you too much in the average department. The nice thing about Reimold compared to a rookie pitcher — say, I don’t know, Hochevar! — is Reimold could slump for a week and only give you a few 0-for-4s, not a 36.00 ERA. If we had to bet, we’d say the Orioles don’t bring him up in order to avoid giving him ‘Super 2’ status. Why would we accuse the Orioles of leaving their best available player in the organization for a specific position in AAA? Anyway, here’s what else we saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Kevin Youkilis – Youuuk can take a spot on the DL. Thanks Sawx. Instead of just putting him on the DL with his oblique injury, they kept him on the bench for 7 days before doing it. Hey man – you might have a bunch of bench spots but us fantasy owners don’t! The DL stint is backdated so he might only be out for another week or so but oblique injuries can be a wickid pissah of an injury.
Dan Haren – 7 IP, 3 ER. “Johan, I think I heard Upton whispering to Byrnesie that they were saving their runs for Doug. No, I’m not being paranoid! Could you just come over?”
Stephen Drew – Returned from the DL. Brother J.D. calls to ask, “They can DL you for less than 60 days?”
Ryan Ludwick – Pulled in the 1st inning with a hamstring injury. That never sounds good. If he has to go on the DL, LaRussa is down to two in his original 4 man OF rotation (Rasmus, Duncan). We have a feeling LaRussa is trying to determine which young pitcher will make the better outfielder – PJ Walters or Mitchell Boggs.
Chien-Ming Wang – 6 shutout innings in Triple-A. I’ve already picked him up in a deep league (16 teams). Hey, I had to get rid of Hocevar as quick as possible. If you have an open DL slot, slide a Wang into it.
Chris Davis – 9th homer of the year and up to .231. Hello, Mr. Reynolds. Goodbye, Mr. Reynolds.
B.J. Ryan – Ricciardi said even when Ryan returns, Downs will be his closer. Yeah, I trust Ricciardi when it comes to B.J.
Carlos Quentin – Out until Friday with a sore heel. That’ll teach him to break bats with his foot.
Luke Hochevar – I was roofied and violated. We won’t go into specifics. But I think I’m done with rookie pitchers. Wait… Against the A’s? Really? Bring back Ponson! I hate you, Hochevar. And I’m glad I can’t pronounce your name, it’ll be easier to forget.
Derek Holland – 1.74 ERA on the year as he got his first win. He’s just working middle relief right now, but he could move into the rotation picture. Wait, didn’t I just say no more rookie pitchers? Damn you, Hochevar.
Kevin Slowey – 6 IP, 1 ER. Great to see Slowey do what he’s supposed to do after Hochevar kicked my teeth in.
Armando Galarraga – 5 2/3, 5 ER. I gotta be honest, it’s nice to see a guy I thought would fail do exactly that. Sorry, to his owners. Scharmandofreude!
Manny Parra – 6 IP, 3 ER, 8 Ks. Manny being Parra with the Ks, but not the walks (only 2). Encouraging… Oh, wait. It was the Marlins. They don’t walk.
Zach Duke – 8 IP, 1 ER. Has only had two disasters through 7 starts, but he doesn’t strikeout out that many guys so I’m a little weary. His ERA should come up a full run, but it’s only at 2.52, so that’s not that bad.
Matt Capps – 3 baserunners, but worked a scoreless ninth with 2 Ks.
Brad Lidge – Gave up another run. I’d continue to hold Madson, something seems off with Lidge right now.
Jayson Werth – 4 steals, including one of home. I didn’t see it, but I have to assume Belisario fell for the ol’ “Hey, look over there!”
Jimmy Rollins – Hit 5th yesterday. I’m sorry, but is that supposed to break him out of his slump? By hitting him in the heart of the order instead of the top? I don’t think this lasts.
Brad Hawpe – 4-for-4 with 1 HR and 5 RBI. Now at .359 with 5 HR and 25 RBI. Hawpe has never taken that next step like Holliday and we’d bet the under on .300, 30 HR, and 100 RBI. While he’ll give you quality numbers, now might be the best time you’ll have to trade him. He’s an awful fielder and, with Colorado’s OF depth, he should be deemed expendable if they are out of the pennant race come July.
Felipe Paulino – 4 IP, 7 ER. Looked more like Ronnie Paulino in this start. While Ronnie’s doing a number two.
Ian Stewart – A solo homer and a grand slam from the 8th spot in the lineup. He has been struggling mightily and Sonovabenched us in a couple leagues. He now has 2B/3B eligibility in ESPN (had it already in Yahoo!) and is still 3 games away from OF eligibility. Hopefully this outburst leads to a couple more OF starts…
Ubaldo Jimenez – 7 IP, 1 ER. Has now pitched three quality starts in a row. The only terrible starts of the year (3 of them) were against the Dodgers (twice) and the Cubs. So if we’re to believe this, he should be a “go pitcher” for his next start against the Pirates.
Daniel Murphy – Could see time at first with Delgado nursing a bad hip. This doesn’t add a whole lot to his value, since Murphy was a borderline outfielder as it was. You don’t really want him at 1st.
Joe Mauer – Fourth homer in his tenth game. Sure does have a lot of *pinkie to mouth* Pauer. Guess when you only play 80 games a year, you gotta get your stats in while you’re playing.
Delmon Young – .277 on the year with 1 homer and 2 steals. Wow is this guy yawnstipating.
Conor Jackson – He’s now on the DL with a ‘general illness’ according to new GM AJ Finch. I got an idea, send him to a “General Hospital.”
Jerry Hairston Jr. – 3-for-7, 3 RBIs and 2 steals in the last two games. .343 in May with 2 homers. Rudy snagged him before this mini-hot streak. Might end tomorrow, but I wouldn’t be surprised if it holds up for another week or so.
Joey Votto – Left the game with dizziness. I thought in Cincy it was called “Dustiness?”
Frank Francisco – Suffering from bicep tendinitis. We picked up Wilson in a few leagues. We’re frankly frankled about it but frankfully Francisco is supposed to be franking it up again in a couple of days.
Jordan Zimmermann – 6 IP, 3 ER. With 8 Ks, he looked solid outside of two innings (1st and 4th). But if you can’t beat the Aint’s, who can you beat? The Nats, actually. But not if you pitch for them. Conundrum!
Matt Cain – 7 IP, 4 ER. God forbid I get a Win in a league. Seriously, what the eff?
Joe Beimel – Almost got the save yesterday for those still torturing themselves with Nats relievers.
Pablo Sandoval – Game winning HR yesterday. After the game, Pablo said through a translator, “San Francisco is my village and no one will pilfer it, except for I.” His translator was dressed like a waiter at Medievel Times. Very weird scene.
