LOGIN

Not sure if you’ve noticed but last year’s ROY runner-up, Jason Heyward, has been AWFUL in May – 2 for 28 with 13 Ks. Now it comes out that he’s got a sore shoulder and his right hand and forearm have become uncomfortably numb.  Hopefully they can give him just a little pin prick that will make him feel better.  Best case is he misses a couple days.  Worst case is amputation via tomahawk.  I think he can avoid the worst case but you never know…Heyward….Hey Ward, something’s wrong with the Beaver.  Ward and Beaver’s last name was Cleaver.  Cleaver is the white man term for tomahawk…..oh oh whoa-a-ho!

Other fantasy baseball news…

Brett Myers – Cloud:  6 ER and 10 baserunners in the first 2 innings.  Extremely faint silver lining:  He threw 4 scoreless innings afterward with 4 baserunners and ended the game with 8 Ks.  The truth is somewhere in between “gumdrop Himalaya.”

Brian Wilson – Got his 3rd win in 5 days.  You think Grey and I are bitter that it seems like every reliever that we don’t own has 2 or 3 vulture wins?  You couldn’t handle the bitterness!

Derek Jeter – 2 for 4 with a SB.  He’s now hitting .283.  I’m not saying he’ll be usable this year but he really does seem to love proving critics wrong.  Except for critics that bemoan he only bangs hot chicks.

Homer Bailey – Two straight winning starts against the Astros with a sub-1.00 ERA/WHIP and 10 Ks.   I really think this could be the year where he has a month of promising starts in between getting shelled and being hurt.  Oh wait, he did that in 2009 and 2010 too.  Well, he’s traditionally been an awfully slow starter (as in 8.00+ ERA, 2.00ish WHIP in his first starts of April/May) so maybe he’s turning over a new leaf.  If you need an SP, might as well take a flyer.  Just bench him after his first bad start and drop him after his second consecutive bad start.

Tim Lincecum – 8 shutout innings with 9 Ks but couldn’t get the win.  Has anyone figured out how he’s actually gained fastball speed this year (92.9 MPH this year vs. 92.4 in 2009 and 91.3 in 2010)?  Aren’t you supposed to come back weaker after pitching a full regular + post-season?  Couldn’t he share this knowledge with Phil Hughes and Javier Vazquez for humanitarian reasons?  Suffice it to say, if Lincecum is throwing 93 MPH, I’d say he’s the best pitcher in fantasy baseball.  (You want to argue Halladay, fine…but Lincecum pitches in a cozier park and has a better K-rate)

Ian Kennedy – Matched Lincecum zero for zero for 8 innings getting 8 Ks along the way.  That’s now a 5 start run where Kennedy has thrown 36 innings of sub 2.00 ERA with nearly a K per inning.  Hear that sound – it’s the buy low window slamming against the pane.  (Gloating moment:  traded Brandon League + David Aardsman for Kennedy in one of our expert leagues last week.)

Rajai Davis – 2 SBs.  For the love of SAGNOF!

Geovany Soto – Left the game in the first inning with a left groin strain.  He’ll have an MRI on his groin tomorrow.  I wonder if they make him get in the big MRI machine or if he just has to thrust into it.  Either way, I’m thinking a groin injury is bad for a catcher and he’ll either miss a week or go on the DL.  In shallow leagues, I’d consider dropping Soto and start playing catcher roulette on the waiver wire.

Troy Tulowitzki – Hit his 9th HR but is just 4 for his last 42.  If you’re going to be a binge hitter, I guess playing at a field named after a beer is fitting.

Ted Lilly – Managed his first solid road start and win in 4 tries with 2 ERs/5 baserunners/4 Ks in 6 IP at Pittsburgh.  Until proven otherwise this year, I’d consider Lilly like an honorary Hodgepadre.  Start him at home and very cautiously in pitcher-friendly matchups but sit him otherwise.  Fun stat – in 2009-2010 with Chicago and LA, Lilly has a 0.94 home WHIP (compared to about a 1.22 WHIP on the road which still isn’t bad…but his road WHIP going into this start was 1.91).

Francisco Liriano – Rest easy, Johnny Vander Meer.  Your consecutive no-hitter streak is safe.  Liriano resembled the pitcher he was every other start this year vs. the no-hitter – giving up 4 ER and 6 baserunners in only 3 innings.  To be fair, Liriano was sick going into the start – he had made the mistake of watching the Twins offense during his off-days.

John Danks – Now 0-6.  Danks for nothing!  This was his worst start of the year:  5 IP/6 ER/12 baserunners.  But in his other 7 starts, he’s managed 6+ innings, 4 or less unearned runs, and 36 Ks in 47 IP.  So I’d hold onto him or consider him a buy low candidate.

Brett Anderson – Last night against Texas:  4 2/3 IP, 4 ER, 10 baserunners.  April 30th start against Texas – 5 IP, 13 baserunners, 7 ER.  Against everyone else, much much better.  Moral of story:  Don’t mess with Texas.

Roger Bernadina – Got a chance to hit leadoff as Desmond and Espinosa have been awful there.  Went 0-for-3 but managed 2 runs and a SB.  So RB didn’t bring the roast beef but at least provided some horsey sauce.

Chris Carpenter – A depressive win over Chicago with 15 baserunners and 4 ER in 7 innings.  This is his third straight start giving up 10 or more hits.  A Carpenter hasn’t been responsible for this many hits since the 1970’s.  Carpenter will be better than this but I’d trade him if you can find someone who’ll focus on his 2009-2010 stats when determining value.

Rene Tosoni – The Twins rookie OF hit a HR in his 2nd start in the last 5 games.  Even if gets the starting role, he’s a marginal player so don’t let him haunt your dreams like he did to Guy Pearce’s character in LA Confidential.

Javier Vazquez – On bereavement leave.  Mourning the loss of his fastball.

Ike Davis – The Mets best hitter so far this year strained his calf.  The Mets training crew ran to Ike but he slapped them when they tried to help.  Late word is that he may play tomorrow but a strained calf usually means a stint on the DL so I’m skeptical.  A strained calf for the Mets usually means a denial of the injury, then a denial on the severity of the injury, then a 60-day DL stint where we find out it’s a torn calf, a denial that it’s a torn calf, and then a father-in-law gets beat up in front of children.