Scott Rolen went 2-for-4 as he hit his 3rd homer in the last week. Now has 11 homers and 30 RBIs. I’d say he’s in this afternoon’s Buy/Sell, but he’s not. He almost was then I thought about what I would write about him. I didn’t want to write about how I wasn’t sure what to write about him. I figured that was pointless. Wait… Oh. Soooo, Rolen will hit 25 homers this year with a decent average and RBIs or he’ll get hurt and play only 100 games. I’m thinking the latter happens, but I’d own him if I needed power for a chance at the former. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Johnny Cueto – 6 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners, 9 Ks. Could say his run of 6 straight solid starts has to do with his opponents, but he’s in the NL Central who’s he gonna face? 1985 Cards? Ooh, Tommy Herr, I’m scared.
Brandon Phillips – I don’t own him anywhere but I get comments about trading him away or some shizz. So I looked at his stats today. He has 6 homers and 7 steals. I’ll agree when you’re going along that’s fairly yawnstipating, but that’s also a 20/20 pace, exactly where he should be. Phillips is who he is. Like with boxers, you gotta your boys breath.
Nelson Cruz – Another day, another hamstring injury. Wouldn’t be surprised to see him back on the DL within a few days. The alternative is he plays through the hamstring injury for a few days then hurts himself worse. If I could bottle a way to strengthen hamstrings, I’d misplace it then find it three years later wondering what it is. Then I’d open it, smell it and think to myself, “Is this Drakkar?”
Curtis Granderson – To return today. Isn’t it weird how it’s today? Tomorrow makes sense. It’s to morrow. You’re going to morrow. Going to day is redundant. Should be just day. Hmm, I sound like I’m on narcotics.
Joey Votto – Out for a second day with a stiff neck. Maybe he has a Viagra lodged in his throat. Thank you, Shecky Greene!
John Ely – 7 1/3 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 4 Ks. Loving Ely so far, even if I benched him in certain leagues yesterday. Hey, can’t blame him that I need a cup check. WHY DO YOU LOVE HIM SO MUCH? Thanks for asking, Mr. Caps. He has 32 Ks against 6 walks and a 1.00 WHIP through 39 innings. He is doing a better impersonation of Slowey than Slowey himself.
Ted Lilly – 7 IP, 0 ER, 6 baserunners, 5 Ks. Now has a 3.63 ERA on the year or exactly the same ERA you would think Ted Lilly would have for the last ten years if you didn’t actually look it up.
Geovany Soto – Has one hit since May 16th. One way to have people stop saying how bad your sophomore slump is by making your junior slump even worse.
Casey McGehee – Kinda weird how it looks like his stat line: 24/9/41/.315/1 and Prince Fielder’s 29/7/19/.264/1 look like they’re in the movie, Vice Versa and Prince Fielder is Fred Savage.
Daisuke Matsuzaka – 4 2/3 IP, 3 ER, 10 baserunners (8 Walks), 1 K. You know it’s bad when you drop a guy before the game is even over and it doesn’t even feel liberating when you lose him. I don’t know how I got bamboozled into starting Dice-BB in a league. Such a bad judgment call. I blame Alfredo Simon for going on the DL and giving me room on my roster.
P.J. Walters – 5 IP, 0 ER, 6 baserunners, 4 Ks. Guy sounds like he’s on an 80’s detective show where he solves all the cases in his pajamas. P.J. Walters: The Groggy Eye. So, this start was vs. the Padres in Petco. He’ll probably stick for now in the rotation with the lose of Lohse. I’d look at him in NL-Only leagues, but no mixed leagues yet.
Josh Willingham – Now has 3 homers in the last week while he bats near .400. Something’s cooking and it smells like ham.
Justin Maxwell – 0-for-3 as he bats .138 for the year. He leadoff yesterday. Nyjer Morgan’s sucking up a boba straw’s worth of crap this year. He bats leadoff all the time. Know how many times Desmond’s hit leadoff? Not once. Thanks, Nats, for my ulcer.
Jose Reyes – 3-for-4 as he raised his average 39 points in the last 7 games. In the beginning of the month, I said he’d be hitting .255 by the end of the month with 17 steals. He needs to hit around .300 in his last three games with a handful of steals. Even if it doesn’t happen what he’s done over the last week shows not only what he can do but what any struggling star can do. Sure, Holliday looks lost. But at some point he will turn it on and you’ll be glad you have him. Nobody talks about the fantasy baseball championship they won on May 31st, still plenty of time left. Over 4 months to be inexact. Okay, school’s out, Alice Cooper.
Carlos Beltran – Mets say Beltran is unlikely to return before mid-July. A report out of New York said a kid who was born the day Beltran went on the DL said his first words yesterday, “Beltran sucks.”
Seth Smith – Has now hit 3 homers in the last two days. He should be in today’s Buy/Sell but he won’t be because I’m telling you to pick him up right now.
Jason Hammel – 5 1/3 IP, 2 ER, 9 baserunners, 8 Ks. Been a complete and utter mess this year, but he had a 3.13 ERA last year in Away games and his next start is in San Francisco.
Gavin Floyd – 7 IP, 3 ER, 5 baserunners, 5 Ks. Now has two solid starts in a row. His peripherals were saying he should be better and it looks like he’s been listening.
Jeff Niemann – 8 IP, 1 ER, 6 baserunners, 5 Ks. Now has a 2.37 ERA and a 1.05 WHIP. I’m going to sound like an obstinate broken record here. But I don’t buy into Neimann at all. At all. At–
B.J. Upton – Sat out his second straight day for a mental rest. As frequent commenter, Steve, said, “Well, owning him is driving me mental so I guess it’s fair enough.”
Jason Kubel – 3-for-4, 5 RBIs and 2 homers as someone popped the Kubel. Now has 5 doubles and 5 homers on the year as he bats .233. I didn’t think he’d only hit 3 homers and .200 the whole year, so he had to hit at some point. This could be the point. He’s really no different than Cody Ross or Luke Scott or a dozen other guys who could hit 25 homers this year. Just depends whose outfield basket you want your eggs.
Javier Vazquez – 5 2/3 IP, 5 ER, 11 baserunners, 2 Ks. He left with a bruised finger. His fantasy owners have a middle finger he can borrow.
Brad Lidge – Wants to return on Monday. Philly fans, prepare your vomit.
