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SPOILER ALERT! Kerry Wood is out for 6 to 8 weeks with a strained dorsi muscle. I thought only dolphins had dorsi muscles.  Huh.  Wait!  Maybe Kerry Wood’s a dolphin.  He does seem like he’d be good at Connect Four… underwater.  Nah, couldn’t be.  Though I could see him getting injured trying to remove a beer from a six pack holder.  Hmm… maybe.  Alas, for another day.  Chris Perez is the pickup.  If my money’s good at this rodeo, Kerry Wood’s not coming back until the All-Star Break and even then he’s no sure thing.  Anyway, here’s some other fantasy baseball news:

Huston Street – Suffering from only shoulder inflammation.  Could resume closer’s role by late-April.  Put this in the file of, See Then Believe.

J.P. Howell – Out for 3 weeks with a sore shoulder.  Can’t The Professor cook him up a cure with some coconuts and straw?

Dioner Navarro – Hurt his leg on a collision.  Could mean more playing time for Kelly Shoppach.  Those who like their ctachers late, take notice.

Cliff Lee – The Adverb might miss a start with an ab strain.  Sounds like someone needs to leave Suzanne Somers’ workouts to the ladies.