I wish there was some kind of baseball pun that could tie into PANAMA!, but I think it’s good enough to stand on its own. I don’t particularly like Van Halen, and for the better part of my childhood I thought he was yelling ANIMAL!, which still may be possible. But one thing’s for sure, for those of you who experienced the 80’s, this song is stuck in the very fabric of our DNA, our very soul. There are just some things that do that. Like the Airwolf theme. It’ll always be in my life. Not just because its my ringtone, but because it has embedded itself into the core of my being. Simply put, it’s a sentimental marker that my mind uses to spark love and happiness. Just like how PANAMA! is. And waffles. Blow-jobs, and so forth. You know what doesn’t get stuck to our fabrics? The names I’m about to talk about. WHY DO I PLAY IN DEEP LEAGUES? So much pain…
Recently activated from the 60-day DL, Tony Abreu is a good MI bench option, both in the Major Leagues and your deep fantasy leagues. He won’t offer much power, but the rate stats won’t be a burden, and there will be a sprinkling of steals. So far in 28 at-bats, he’s put up a triple slash of 286/355/429. Not too shabby.
Former top-10 prospect of the Detroit Tigers, Alfredo Figaro has spent the last two years in Japan where he put up a decent 3.31 ERA and 1.29 WHIP. It’s nothing spectacular, especially considering the environment, but signed by Milwaukee, there has been an uptick in velocity. He used to be more of a 90-93 MPH guy, but now is average around 95 MPH on his fastball. This could be an intriguing buy-low, as he still very much under the radar. Used primarily as a reliever, some spot starts are going his way, and so far, in 51 innings, he has a respectable 3.88 ERA with 40 k’s. He’s giving up more homeruns than you would like, but if he continues to get starts, Figaro could turn out to be what Marco Estrada was supposed to be. He’s worth a speculative add now in all deep leagues if you have the space.
How the mighty have fallen. Once All-Star and bearer of an above average mustache, Brad Hawpe has been all but irrelevant the past four years. That necessarily won’t change, but he did just get promoted from Triple-A to the Major League roster for the Angels of Anaheim in the greater Los Angeles area of Orange county in California, which is, of course, their unabridged name. There might be some power potential if given enough at-bats, but I really don’t see much happening here. Stranger things have happened, so try to keep an eye on playing time.
So Ed Lucas, how are we doing? Good? That’s strange, because no one has ever heard of you until now. In fact, I’m pretty sure no one has ever written about you until now. I’m not sure if that reflects more poorly on you or me. The 31-year old rookie, yes, I know he’s old, actually has been holding his own in limited time. Sure, his slugging percentage is only 30 points above his .271 batting average, but the walk rate seems for real, which might help you as a short term fix in OBP leagues. As long as Placido Polanco remains fragile, Lucas will get starts.
Jaywrong is a 30-year old Korish writer who finds solace using Makers Mark as a vehicle to impress average-looking women, and also has an affinity for making Jennifer Lawrence GIFs. You can follow him @jaywrong, read his blog Desultory Thoughts of a Longfellow, or, you can find his GIFs at his tumblr, named Siuijeonseo.
