While looking at the waiver wire:

Red Light Special -- Thank you for Justin Verlander, Adam Dunn, or any other drafted star that starts off slowly and ends up on the waiver wire.

Blew Light Special -- Someone who had a chance, but blew it, and now is on the waiver wire. For example, Felix Pie, Bill Hall (soon), and of the schmohawks from the Brave's closing experiment, etc.

Poo Poo Platter -- Absolutely nothing available. When torn between Scott Hairston, Rajai Davis, Reggie Abercrombie, and the Artist Formally Known as Luiz Gonzalez for an outfielder you know that you've hit the poo poo platter.