Frenchy’s back, Jordan Schafer’s going to hit 161 home runs (accounting for one rainout, of course) and McCann’s going to win the MVP. Oh, and Lowe’s winning the Cy Young. Unanimous. Spring has sprung and baseball’s back. It’s a good time to be alive. Aren’t you glad you didn’t eat any peanuts in the last three months? They’re poisonous, ya’ll. (It’s a wonder Jimmy Carter’s still going strong. He is a superhero.) Right now, I feel like putting some tilapia on the grill, an Olde English in an oversized cozy and kicking back for the next six months while the sounds of baseball dance in my head. Oh, and win all my fantasy baseball leagues; that would be nice too. The number one thing you don’t want to do in the next few weeks is overrate anything you see. You’re not winning your league in the first few weeks, but you can sure as heckfire lose them. As inviting as Jordan Schafer seems right now, don’t drop Milton Bradley for him. Even if Milton does the devil’s work. Jordan Schafer’s an intriguing name in deep leagues. Just don’t jump out the window until you see how real the fire is. On the other hand, don’t ignore what goes on these first few weeks. This is when The ’08 Nadys (<–great band name) emerge. Anyway, here’s what I saw this weekend for fantasy baseball:
Joey Devine – Aching Joey Devine is out for 60 days. Punt! Not worth holding a “potential” closer who may not be back for a while.
Gary Sheffield – Omar Minaya must’ve heard Sheff was raised in a Latin district of Tampa. Not worth looking at in anything but the deepest of leagues.
Ichiro Suzuki – Bleeding ulcer, out until April 15th. Endy Chavez will be batting leadoff on opening day. Good to see the Mariners have a Plan B. See Razzpoll on the bottom right for possible reasons behind Ichiro’s ulcer.
Derek Lowe – 8 innings, 0 runs. Had a 2.88 ERA last April and has started off this one on a good note. Next start, Washington. Yum.
Josh Anderson – Will get the nod for the Tigers in the opening today. Has little power, but speed to burn — SAGNOF.
Brandon Morrow – Will close from the onset of the year. If you think you’re being cute with Aardsma or Mark Lowe or Batista, you’re not.
Elijah Dukes – 4th outfielder to start the season. Was on the Fantasy Baseball Buy/Sell on Friday as a Sell. I wonder if Dukes is angry.
David Freese – Just when you think you’ve got LaRussa figured out, he plays Brian Barden at third in the Cards first game. It’s only against lefties… supposedly.
Jeff Francoeur – HR yesterday. Could this be the start of something?
Kelly Shoppach – Getting time behind the plate in the first game with Garko sitting. Encouraging sign, except for Garko owners.
Brian Wilson – Boo-boo healed. Will get saves to open the season.
Matt Lindstrom – Ready to go for opening day. Aren’t we all?
B.J. Ryan – No velocity, no cry. He’s the closer to start the season.
Mark Reynolds/Justin Upton – Sitting tomorrow against the “tough” righty, Aaron Cook. Let’s hope for a speedy collision between Chad Tracy and Eric Byrnes.
Brett Myers – This time on the other side of a beating. Was on our risky pitcher post. Am I worried? Not really, but I didn’t go near him in any draft either.
Mike Gonzalez – Our first Kazaam! of the season. It’s good to be back.
