We’ve looked at top 20 catchers, 1st basemen, 2nd basemen, 3rd basemen and shortstops for 2008 and we’ve seen one recurring theme. Offense was waaay down in 2008 (That’s right, “way” with three A’s!). With the top 20 outfielders for 2008, the theme continues. You get a full-frontal shot of the outfielders’ offensive problems in 2008 when you look at Matt Kemp’s 2008 predictions and final stats. His preseason predictions were 95/20/75/.290/20 and he came in with 93/18/76/.290/35. His steals were a bit higher (another recurring theme), but I’m like Ms. mothereffin’ Cleo with these predictions. Seriously, bow down, non-mustachioed wo/man. Kemp gave you almost exactly what I predicted he would and I ranked him 36th, but he came in 10th. That doesn’t mean I’m a savant with predictions and an idiot with rankings. No, it means offense was waaaay down (Four A’s!). I was pretty close with my predictions for Manny too and he moved from 21st to 2nd. Anyway, here’s the top 20 Outfielders for 2008 in fantasy baseball and how they compared to where we originally ranked them:
1. Matt Holliday – 25 home runs in Coors? Zoinks! What happens if he’s traded? Does he hit 15 home runs and steal 35? Victorino called, he wants his stats back. Preseason Rank #1, Preseason Predictions: 110/40/125/.310/7, Final Numbers: 107/25/88/.321/28
2. Manny Ramirez – It’s just like Manny to leave a hitter’s park for a pitcher’s park and see his value skyrocket. The touring company of Rainman should consider casting Manny, he’s a natural. Imagine trying to read him for cheating at the blackjack table. It would be impossible. Actually, the one caveat is Manny couldn’t be in on it. If he knew he were cheating, he giggle uncontrollably. Preseason Rank #21, Preseason Predictions: 85/32/105/.315, Final Numbers: 102/37/121/.332
3. Lance Berkman – Already went over Berkman in the top 20 1st basemen for 2008. Preseason Rank #12, Preseason Predictions: 100/30/115/.310/5, Final Numbers: 114/29/106/.312/18
4. Grady Sizemore – The Zagat Guide to Cleveland said, “The twelfth chapter of “The Akron Ladies Spread for Grady’s Baby,” were “happy” with his “numbers.” Calling him a “speed/power combo to make a jackhammer envious” and they’d like to sandwich him like the Rs on the word rawr.” Preseason Rank #2, Preseason Predictions: 120/35/85/.290/30, Final Numbers: 101/33/90/.268/38
5. Carlos Beltran – Beltran was underrated on the Royals, then overrated on the Mets and now he seems to have found his way back to underrated. The only thing that remains the same, he can play a gay teenager with aplomb. Preseason Rank #9, Preseason Predictions: 100/27/110/.270/18, Final Numbers: 116/27/112/.284/25
6. Josh Hamilton – Fantasy baseball shot itself up on Hamilton for the fist half of the year, then, as with any good buzz, there were fewer thrills later on and mostly you were left trying to reclaim some of the past highs. Preseason Rank #38, Preseason Predictions: 70/27/80/.300/5, Final Numbers: 98/32/130/.304/9
7. Ichiro Suzuki – Here’s a monkey serving beer in Japan. With more and more monkeys waiting tables to make ends meet, it makes me wonder… Will more and more monkeys also try to make it as actors? Or will actors start being monkeys? Either way, go watch that monkey again. It’s wonderful! (You gotta love how he sneaks off to eat edamame. Monkeys love edamame — case closed.) Oh, bee-tee-dubya, Ichiro got some hits and some steals. Who saw that coming? Preseason Rank #11, Preseason Predictions: 110/10/65/.330/45, Final Numbers: 103/6/42/.310/43
8. Ryan Ludwick – Ludwick is the first completely out of nowhere outfielder. Last year, he hit more home runs in the major leagues than he hit at any stop in the minors, which is saying a lot considering he’s 30 years old and, like Gary Glitter, he’s been banging around the minors since 1999. Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers: 104/37/113/.299/4
9. Ryan Braun – Already went over Braun in the top 20 3rd basemen for 2008. (Note: Braun was only ranked for 3rd basemen. In all fairness, I would’ve ranked him above Ryan Ludwick.), Preseason Predictions: 100/27/105/.280/12, Final Numbers: 92/37/106/.285/14
10. Matt Kemp – Kemp’s 2008 was like Tom Cruise in Risky Business. It may have only been one movie, but you just knew more was on the way. Hopefully, in a few years, Kemp doesn’t hit a home run then begin to laugh like a madman while wearing five inch heals on his cleats. Preseason Rank #36, Preseason Predictions: 95/20/75/.290/20, Final Numbers: 93/18/76/.290/35
11. Bobby Abreu – I’m convinced there’s no better way to go under radar in fantasy baseball than to have a 20/20 season as an outfielder. The Witness Protection Agency should reassign people into the major leagues and give them ten years of 20/20 seasons. Preseason Rank #13, Preseason Predictions: 120/15/110/.310/20, Final Numbers: 100/20/100/.296/22
12. Nate McLouth – We didn’t rank him, but Rudy did say on Opening Day, “(McLouth has) SB and Run potential. Enough pop for 15 HR. Enough speed for 30 SB. AVG won’t be great.” And that’s me quoting Rudy! Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers: 113/26/94/.276/23
13. Johnny Damon – Is it me or are Yankees suddenly being underrated and forgotten? Some sort of anti-Big Business/anti-ESPN thing going on here. Damon’s numbers were eerily similar to Alexis Rios and think about how many teams Rios clogged up. Seriously, think about it. I don’t see you thinking. There ya go. Preseason Rank #33, Preseason Predictions: 105/15/70/.280/15, Final Numbers: 95/17/71/.303/29
14. Shane Victorino – Hamilton-Burrishly, Victorino and Rios dueled during the regular season to see who would hit more home runs, so it’s fitting that they should come in 14th and 15th respectively. However, The Flying Hawaiian provided a lot more value than Rios considering their ADP. (BTW, how about “Hamilton-Burrishly?” All the kids are gonna be saying that. As soon as they figure out what it means.) Preseason Rank #35, Preseason Predictions: 115/15/60/.280/40, Final Numbers: 102/14/58/.293/36
15. Alexis Rios – At 15th overall for outfielders, Rios wasn’t as bad as, say, Carl Crawford, but still the power never came. Rios’s power numbers look like Jason Kendall having a Brady Anderson-type ‘roids season. (Minus the sideburns, of course. Speaking of sideburns, am I the only one not watching the new Beverly Hills, 90210? Actually, I should rephrase that, am I the only one not watching Beverly Hills, 90210 who thought they would definitely watch? I just have no desire at all. Now this is either because I’ve outgrown that demographic, which seems unlikely, since I Tivo three hour chunks of MTV and will watch a RR/RW Challenge rerun three times without getting tired of it. Or, and this seems more likely, the show is just lame. The new Brenda reminds me of a girl I would date and breakup with, and I never breakup with anyone. I leave a relationship kicking and screaming. The black kid is no longer running drugs for Marlo — where’s Snoop? The mom is hot. Mrs. Walsh wasn’t hot. WTF? Finally, their stories of kids doing drugs are trying so hard to be salacious. The original 90210 worked because the stories were cheesy with a goofy Steve Sanders runner. Where’s my goofy Steve Sanders runner?!) Preseason Rank #6, Preseason Predictions: 120/32/110/.300/25, Final Numbers: 91/15/79/.291/32
16. Jacoby Ellsbury – In the beginning of the season, if I would’ve told you a Red Sox player would have 50 steals and not get to 100 runs, would you have believed me? What is going on with offense around the Major Leagues? When I’m putting together the ’09 predictions, I’m going to have to put on the sweater that not only makes me look smart, but makes me think smart too. Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers: 98/9/47/.280/50
17. Jason Bay – I pushed Rios like those dudes on Las Vegas Boulevard handing out stripper flyers, while I warned you against touching Bay like the bouncers at those same strip clubs. Okay, so I made a few missteps in the predictions. Preseason Rank #34, Preseason Predictions: crap/crap/and more crap, Final Numbers: 111/31/101/.286/10 or better than crap, as it were.
18. Carlos Quentin – I told you to watch him in February when he first reported to camp. Not sure why I didn’t rank him or make predictions for him. Maybe it was that one week frozen custard bender where I blacked out and woke up in the lap of some large woman wearing a skirted bathing suit. If it wasn’t for Quentin misplacing blame on his equipment, he prolly would’ve ranked higher and might’ve won the MVP. Nothing good will ever come of that temper of yours, Mr. Quentin. Preseason Unranked, Final Numbers: 96/36/100/.288/7
19. Nick Markakis – The Greek God of Roto didn’t take the power to the next level like I hoped and stopped running completely in the 2nd half. He’s only 24 and you haven’t heard me say “I am Sparkakis” for the last time yet. Preseason Rank #8, Preseason Predictions: 100/27/115/.300/20, Final Numbers: 106/20/87/.306/10
20. Jermaine Dye – His lack of speed lands him at the 20th spot, but I’d prefer him to some of his schmohawk contemporaries… *cough* Rios *cough* Preseason Rank #31, Preseason Predictions: 90/25/105/.280, Final Numbers: 96/34/96/.292/3
