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Hey, I’m Higgins and I’m going to be posting updates about our Fantasy Razzball leagues.  If you are not familiar with Fantasy Razzball, it is a league format where us truly masochistic fantasy baseballers try to build the worst fantasy baseball team possible. Full rules can be found here.

Now that we are over a month into the season it is time to not only look at the master standings and applaud those that have successfully been terrible, but also put on our 20/20 Hindsight Glasses and mock the bad performances in the land of bad performances.  Six leagues of ten were formed and thus far the king of the anti-champions is Pyramid Lake Cui-ui, coming out of Division 3 with 1,550 points.  Fueling his super futility is his drafting of three of the top six positions players on the player rater: Emilio Bonifacio (151 points, 1st round), Clint Barmes (148, 3rd), and Marlon Byrd (139, 15th). No slouch at being terrible on the mound either, he has milked five losses out of Ervin Santana after picking him up as a free agent and watching him become the #1 pitcher on the board with 119 points. Congratulations on your early lead and skills at assembling a terrible team, Pyramid Lake Cui-ui! If we find out you are Dayton Moore in disguise, you will be disqualified for cheating.

Looking back at draft day we can recognize some early breakthroughs and busts (other than Billy Butler’s). In 2011 Adam Dunn put up an incredible league-best 608 points, and as a result he was taken in the first round of every draft this year. Those hoping for a repeat from Big Donkey, complete with the all-important first base eligibility, have been pummeled with a net total of -1 points so far. Whoops!

Meanwhile Austin Jackson‘s 181 strikeouts and only 10 home runs in 2011 made him #3 on the board with 503 points and a favorite for 2012 Fantasy Razzball MVP as he went first overall in 4 out of the 6 drafts (and second overall in Razzball 5, where team My Sports Rumors either missed the draft or didn’t get the league memo as he took Miguel Cabrera first overall). What has Ajax rewarded those early drafters with here in 2012? Just 14 points in 118 at-bats as he hits .322 and is “only” striking out 19% of the time.  Man, he’s gotta get better at being worse!  Confused?  Me too!

And the breakthrough performances through the first month and change? Danny Espinosa leads all players with 165 points as he hits .191 and strikes out 30% of the time, but he was a top 20 player in 2011 and was drafted as early as the 2nd round. The real surprise player in the rankings is Albert Pujols, who was a top-five player until last week and comes in with 119 points in 126 at-bats. Undrafted by anyone not pulling a La Russa and falling asleep at the wheel to autodraft their team, El Hombre is racking up razz points like it’s 1909. He has been picked up by only those with the biggest cojones, as he could quickly go from 2011 Adam Dunn to 2012 Adam Dunn who I guess could go back to 2011 Adam Dunn but is being owned like he’s 2012 Adam Dunn, or unowned or…  Yeah, I’m not sure, but there you have it!

Until next time, keep an eye out for those AAA call-ups and injury replacements and anyone getting playing time with the Minnesota Twins

From Around The Web

  1. Marty Funkhouser says:
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    Really wish I’d joined one of these leagues. Looks like more fun and a little less pressure than the “real” leagues I’m in.

    • Higgins

      Higgins says:
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      @Marty Funkhouser, Fantasy Razzball is definitely an awesome change of pace and tons of fun, but it is super challenging since not only are you not used to looking at fantasy baseball in this way but lots of the best players you’ve never heard of.

      Definitely try it out next year.

  2. 2 Cups 1 Braun says:
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    Really, the Sociopath brings in downs for the 1 out save attempt. Why don’t you just allow your boy to kick a goal with an empty net and act like he’s the next David Beckham.

    • @2 Cups 1 Braun, what a tease for anyone who owned frieri or walden and wanted to see downs go down

  3. Matt says:
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    Is Middlebrooks worth putting in a waiver claim for or is he really gonna be sent down after Youk comes back?

  4. yep, I said it says:
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    Thanks for the update. Keep them coming.

    This is my first time in a league like this, and I have to admit: it’s tougher than I thought. I’ve honestly been trying, and I am in third place in my league and 200 points behind the overall leader. Deep respect for the other managers!

    • @yep, I said it, agreed. hard work to uncover all the new turd nuggets as they get sent down or released if they do their job too well. *pours some of his 40 outto commemorate chone figgins 3 year run as a 1st round pick

    • 3FingersBrown says:
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      @yep, I said it, No doubt. Razz is tough! My first year in this league and it’s a lot of fun… and ultimately very rewarding when your Daric Barton goes and shits the bed for a whole week straight and manages to keep a job. Good stuff guys. Thanks for the update!

    • Higgins

      Higgins says:
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      @yep, I said it, it’s definitely really challenging. 200 points can swing in just a few days though!

  5. chata says:
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    *attention … razz players *

    the royals brought up vin mazzaro ! !

    grab him .
    BIG numbers .

  6. Eddie says:
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    So how’d all the experts so badly overestimate Matt Moore? He’s less David Price, and more Vincent Price. As in it’s a mystery where his talent disappeared to.

    • @Eddie, that’s why wecall rookie pitchers roofies

  7. MeanMachine says:
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    No shiz. Glad my boy Grey told me to stay away.

    Need some help deciding who to pick up between Heath Bell, Bud Norris, Sherzer- who i dropped after my Ms beat the hell outa him and the new wonder boy Reddick. I can only pick up 3 of the 4. Its a weird points league. Dropping Mark Reynolds, Daniel Hudson and Sean Marshall. No DL obviously. Thanks

    • @MeanMachine, all but Bell

  8. Mrhappytime says:
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    Zambrano, Burnett, or Edwin Jackson tomm? I need low ERA and K’s.

    • cockyphoenix says:
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      @cockyphoenix, P.S. What has been frayed does not spontaneously unfray itself

      His elbow may finally be catching up to reality.

      • Higgins

        Higgins says:
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        @cockyphoenix, I was considering this as well. Remember when he was supposedly going to have TJ then just didn’t? Hmmm…

  9. MJD Took A Knee says:
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    I still like that I drafted LaHair as my first pick. All I read about him said AAAA player. I couldn’t even pick him up in other leagues my mind was so tainted.

    And yeah someone picked up Albert in my league. If I did that he would hit 20 homers in a week.

  10. Ranger Danger says:
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    If I need steals, is it a good idea to keep Gardner on my bench (can’t DL cause I have Ryan Howard). I ask cause Middlebrooks is available and Gardner is the only droppable player I have.
    Who would you rather have at this point. I currently have Zimmerman at 3B and only have 2 Util spots.

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