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Mike Jacobs hit two home runs yesterday. Baseball Tonight’s Chris Singleton said Jacobs could hit “a lot” of home runs if he stayed healthy. You know what? Singleton has “a lot” of insight. Funny thing happened on the way to June, Mike Jacobs has thirteen home runs. More than Fielder, Tex, Morneau, Pena and Miguel Cabrera. Now I’m not saying Jacobs will be more valuable than these guys, but Jacobs is way more affordable in a trade. He’s a lot like Carlos Pena in ’07. Both showed power, but lacked consistency and health. Poor average — check. Clouds of doubt about what they’ll be worth at the end of the year — check, check. Both playing in front of near capacity crowds (for a WNBA game) — check. Pena’s last year owners can also attest that if you own him, you’re better off holding onto him, cause you’ll never get value for him. But if you don’t own him, he’ll cost a lot less than the big boys. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday:

Homer Bailey – About to be called up. Remember when he was their most hyped prospect? Since then, Bruce and Votto have had great starts, they acquire Volquez, and Cueto has a spot in the rotation. Don’t expect much from Bailey. He doesn’t really deserve the call-up as he hasn’t corrected his biggest flaw – wildness. He walked 29 in 66 IP at Triple-A. For Bailey’s sake, we hope the expectations are set closer to Fogg than Volquez.

Mark Prior – Shoulder surgery for Prior causing him to miss the rest of the season. In other news, taco diarrhea burns.

Tim Hudson – I was watching the game when he left with his leg injury. It didn’t look that bad, but then again I get these rashes on my leg and I’ve diagnosed myself as having The African Gong-Gong Disease and prescribed myself a wet towelie and two Little Orphan Orange Otter Pops, so I may not be the best person to ask. Leg problems will probably shelve him for a week. Best case scenario, he misses two starts and returns fine. Worst case, he returns too soon and really messes things up by favoring his injured leg. This is some Trapper John, M.D. suspense!

Brain Bannister – One run in 7+ IP. He looks like a good guy to not pick up in mixed leagues.

Troy Glaus – Hit a HR yesterday. LaRussa says Glaus is going to start hitting more home runs now that the weather is heating up. What you need to ask yourself, is this sober LaRussa talking or drunk LaRussa? I think it’s sober LaRussa.

Ian Snell – If you have him still in your lineup, I’m assuming there was a death in the family and you haven’t check your team in a while. Or you’re just dopey. Either way, my condolences.

Nate McLouth – Ended May with a .279 average. That’s a better representation than April’s .330. Maybe Karabell’s intern misread his refrigerator magnets.

Chase Utley – 20th HR/6th steal. I picked him for NL MVP, so I obviously believe. He’s also one of the few guys that I don’t have on any team, but still can’t root against. Take that schadenfreude (Word of the Day)!

Shawn Hill – Gave up an ill-timed home run to… Who am I kidding? No one cares what Shawn Hill did yesterday.

Chad Tracy – Batting fourth, hitting his second home run three days. CoJack will be out at least a week with a quad strain.

JR Towles – Batting .145 with five hits in all of May.

Bartolo Colon – Now 3-0. I still wouldn’t go near him with a three foot churro. (Only partly because waving a three foot churro near Bartolo would be similar to going to a grizzly bear observatory wearing nothing but bikini briefs made of Marshmallow Fluff…. Talk about a Fluffernutter — oofa!)

Alexei Ramirez/Alexi Casilla – Both can provide some value if you’re weak at MI. Also, if one of them books two dates on the same night, they could pull the old switcheroo and send the other guy out on one of the dates, which is a lot easier than bringing both dates to the same place and then running back and forth switching outfits ala Alex P. Keaton.

Adrian Gonzalez – I’m not really surprised he’s still hitting bombs, but I’d like to see him hit them in July and August.

Carlos Beltran – HRs in 2 straight games to boost his season total to 7. If you invested a top pick in him, you’ve got to be hoping this is the start of one of his streaks.

Johnny Cueto – I said I wouldn’t write about him again until he proved himself. Well, 5 IP of no-hit ball pulled me back in, but he’s still giving up fly balls (10) and not making enough people miss (3). Love the upside, but don’t get too excited. Worth holding onto, but don’t be afraid to bench him if the matchup is bad.

JJ Putz – Another horrendous night. 4 runs in 2/3 of an inning. Who does he think he is – Carlos Silva?

Ryan Church – Hit a home run after returning from his concussion. Talking about the concussion, Church had this to say, “I really know how Snuka felt after that Piper’s Pit.”

158 Responses

  1. Tony B. says:
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    Following up on Dioner – no I can’t stash Doumit on my DL b/c Furcal and Holliday are already occupying my 2 spots…

    Also – Church or Damon ? I know you like Damon more than the next guy -

  2. Zebo says:
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    drop ben francisco and pick up chad tracy until co jacks is back?

  3. Zebo says:
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    is it time to panick about Ortiz yet? He IS my team.

  4. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Tony B.: In the last seven games, Dioner batted .348. Doumit is headed to the minors for at least two games. I doubt Dioner will be picked up if you drop him, but I also don’t think Doumit is going to help you until next week. You know your league best, do you have to get Doumit right now, or can you wait five days? If you can’t wait, grab him and take a goose egg at catcher for a week. It’s not the worst position to do that at, but it might not be necessary. I’d grab Doumit Wednesday or Thursday if I were you.

    Damon has four less home runs than Church and 7 more steals. He will get more runs, less RBIs. He’s also much safer, with no upside. Church has some slight upside. It’s your call.

    @Zebo: Yeah, I would for a week to see if Tracy can get and stay hot.

    @Zebo: He ahd three home runs in his last 7 games, batting over .300. Those aren’t stats you panic over. His wrist strain might be an issue though. But no word yet on his MRI.

  5. Steve says:
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    @Grey: Sorry to nag on Bruce, but want to try a different tack. Guy in my league says he is listening to offers for Tex, but wants starting pitching (I am relievers only). Thus, what SP gets Tex? Then maybe I can use Bruce (plus whoever else) to get some SP that can land me Tex.
    As always, really appreciating the help, Grey…

  6. cockyphoenix says:
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    And I just turned down Ellsbury for Putz before that god-awful performance. We count losses, too. The best closer in fantasy last year has to bounce back at least enough to be worth owning, right, right?

    Anyway the word is that Steve Trachsel doesn’t start on Tuesday. Maybe Radhames Liz has calmed his arm down a bit and deserves a look, or maybe Dave Trembley is just tired of Steve’s worthless old punk ass. Either way, I like not seeing old Steve regardless of the reason.

  7. BSA says:
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    re: KGreene – my FA list top ten as of June 1st based on points (not personal opinion)
    Crosby, Peralta, Renta, Betancourt, Scutaro, Barmes, Lopez, Keppinger, Harris.
    Others to include due to mentions on Razz
    Hairston and Kouzmanoff

    Shortstop has me in a pickle!
    Part of me wants to play the hot hand until KGreene shows life again. Part of me says he’ll snap out of it, except I just don’t trust the mug shot he has on CBS.

  8. Baron Von Vulturewins says:
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    I like that you featured Jacobs — my plan is to go out and get him with one of my Junky Closers ™ (probably Torres — though he’s been awesome!) then trade AGonzo for pitching. I love it when a theoretical plan theoretically comes together!

    re: Homer Bailey: I need pitching bad, but even I can’t get excited about this guy. Let’s see: Extended audition in ’07 during which he was terrible: check. Return stint to AAA in ’08 during which he wasn’t much better: check. Awful attitude: check. Call-up to bandbox stadium for .500 team: check. Wears bad mullet and looks like the no-good nephew who ruins the family’s longstanding and profitable moonshine business through his brash incompetence: check. Please — somebody sell me on this guy!

    Fluffernutter = priceless. I may need to change my Razzteam’s name.

  9. BSA says:
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    Pitching the closers in a weekly head to head
    So my team is 7-2 as of last night – 3 weeks ago I sat Ryan, he scored 50 and I lost my first game by 20. Yesterday he gave up 2 ER and I lost by 13.
    Ahhh – trying to predict those closers
    Overall though for the week my starters averaged – 20 points and my closers averaged 22. worst case scenario a closer earns the equivalent of quality start with a loss.

    My record since adjusting to 4 starters and three starters is 1 and 1.

    This week with Hudson going down my four starters and three closer philosophy is tested as the team I am up against 9 pitch starts (Cain, colon, Halladay, Meche, ESantana, Sheets, Snell) with no closres to my 5 pitch starts (Bedard, Harden, Lincee, and either Kershaw, Shields, or Cueto) with 3 closers – Rauch, Ryan, Papelbon.

    Anyone have input for me to chew on as I decide between Kershaw, Cueto, and Shields? I have my answer penciled in but looking for match-up input.

  10. Frank Rizzo says:
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    I’m not sure if I’m the only one paying attention in my league or not….but….Jorge Campillo is still just sitting on the wire in my 10 team Yahoo league.

    I’ve got…
    Bedard
    Lincecum
    Shields
    Wainwright
    Owings
    Kershaw

    Would Campillo be worth dropping one of the others for? I’m trying to trade Owings to get help elsewhere but if I can’t, should I make a move for him? He’s been lights out so far.

  11. Frank Rizzo says:
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    Ooops. Forgot, I’ve got Joba too.

  12. Kevin says:
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    How about when Jack Tripper had to pull off three dates at the same time? One in his apartment, one downstairs in Mr. Furley’s place, and one upstairs in Larry’s room.

  13. Frank Rizzo says:
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    @ Kevin: What? He couldn’t handle a 4th at the Regal Beagle? Lightweight.

  14. Kevin says:
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    @Frank: He couldn’t even handle the three. As you may recall he ended up with a bowl of pasta and a bottle of wine dumped over his head.

  15. JL says:
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    Great site!

    I need to pick a SP for this week out of the following…
    Jurrjens, Cueto, Kershaw or Westbrook

    My other starters are Harang, Volquez, Marcum, Waino, and Maine.

  16. SaltyBiscuits says:
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    I think the biggest difference between Pena last year and Jacobs this year is the OBP. Jacobs currently sitting at a robust .298 OBP. Pena finished last year at .410. Even if Jacobs hits 46 dongs this year he wont have close to the value Pena had last year. Pena managed to score 99 runs in ’07, due to his narsty OBP. Jacobs is on pace for 39 bombs but only 72 runs. (Now I am not saying that 39 big flies isn’t valuable… not at all, just that he loses value compared to Pena based on his fear of not swinging).

    Jacobs could be a very useful fantasy player and he is very easily acquired right now. So take the flier, just keep the expectations in check.

    I once saw Jay Bruce hit 3 home runs with one swing. He scored 11 runs on the play and was awarded 3 bonus rbi’s due to his sheer awesomeness.

  17. BSA says:
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    Second requet for guidance this morning – someone dropped Isringhausen – Is he worth a pick-up and stash?

  18. SaltyBiscuits says:
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    @ JL

    I know I could find this out, but would you mind filling me in on who those pitchers are facing (team, opposing pitcher, home or away)? T’would help me in my advice giving abilities or some shit.

  19. Frank Rizzo says:
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    So does anyone know what the hell Delmon Young’s problem is? I thought he was supposed to be a stud. Not one HR yet?

    Is he a buy low that’s going to explode?

  20. p0rk burn says:
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    @BSA: No. I had him and dropped him, he’s still sitting there looking sad. Cards don’t seem to be trying too hard to get him back into closing shape. Franklin has been solid in his stead and Perez appears to be waiting for an opportunity of his own. I wouldn’t waste the roster spot on him.

    Pick him up in the RazzBall League.

  21. BSA says:
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    @porkburn – That’s mighty big of you – Pick him up in razzball league to solidify my basement dwelling. I am still licking my wounds from a roto league I dabbled with last year.
    I am set at closer but am trying to keep my in free agency because my leaguemates aren’t razzing their teams.

  22. @SaltyBiscuits: Good points Salty on Jacobs. Jay Bruce once got to third on a single and then drove himself in.

  23. All: Sorry can’t reply this morning. The ‘Man’ is making me do work. Grey should be up soon to carry the weight (as usual)

  24. BSA says:
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    re- post #7 – just woke up and discovered I must have been sleeping when I listed Kouzmanoff. WTF

  25. IowaCubs

    IowaCubs says:
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    Just got an offer of McCann for Zambrano?… I know I can do better than this, but my backup is Posada, and you know how I love big sweaty Cubs. My starters are Wainwright, Volquez, Contreras, Litsch and Guthrie.

  26. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: Wainwright, Maine, Billingsley… But I think you’re asking a lot to flip Bruce for a SP then flip the SP for Tex. How can you be sure what the guy who wants Tex values?

    @cockyphoenix: Putz must be bothered by an injury.

    Watch it, Trash-el carried my Razzball team the other day.

    @BSA: I’d go Peralta, Greene, Renteria, Crosby, punt.

    @Baron Von Vulturewins: Moving a Junky Closer™ for him would be a great move.

    @BSA: I’m not even sure of matchups and it’s Shields.

    @Frank Rizzo: I’d let Campillo ride the waivers. Your pitchers are fine for now.

    @JL: I’d go Cueto, Kershaw, Jurrjens then Westbrook. In that order. BTW, As Salty Biscuits pointed out above, it does help to give matchups.

    @SaltyBiscuits: Well said on Jacobs.

    Jay Bruce just served me Kenyan coffee that he got from Greenland. (Bruce moved Kenya to Greenland to balance the two climates.)

    @BSA: Depends on how badly you need a closer. I feel like anyone who’s getting saves is worth a roster spot, since Izzy is not getting saves, but the assumption is he will be when he returns, it depends on who you are dropping.

    @p0rk burn: When’s the Razzball commenters’ league draft?

  27. Dana Eveland or Edwin Jackson?

    Ben Francisco or Ryan Spilbourghs?

  28. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @IowaCubs: So do better. I don’t trust Posada at all. He was a major bust candidate coming into the season and now he’s coming back from injury. Why don’t you move him for a second rate closer?

  29. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Freak: Jackson — Spilborghs, but Spilborghs is contingent on X-rays coming back today on wrist.

  30. Bob says:
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    So, Mike Jacobs, Jason Giambi, or Todd Helton? Trying to rank crappy 1B in my main Yahoo league where I need everything. In the same league, would you start Oliver Perez tonight against crappy San Fran in that huge stadium with the everchanging name?

  31. Frank Rizzo says:
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    Hey Grey, what’re your thoughts on Delmon Young? Is he a buy? I know you liked him coming into the year, but how about now? Where’s the power?

  32. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Bob: Jacobs, Giambi, Helton, they’re all close and Helton obviously giving you different things than the other two. I would start him, but he’s risky.

    @Frank Rizzo: Sorry, I missed that above. I did like him a lot coming into the year, but he’s a strikeout machine. I’m watching him for signs, but I haven’t seen many to buy right now.

  33. Baron Von Vulturewins says:
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    @Frank Rizzo: Where’s the power? Exactly. Young’s always been highly touted, but he’s never hit for big power — not at any level. (He did hit 26 home runs in 2005 btw AA and AAA — but then 11 in ’06 btw AAA and MLB; then 13 last year — but that was in a mammoth 681 ABs, which is like a season and a half. Given that many at-bats, I could probably hit about 8).

    Scouts just assumed the power would come because he’s a strapping lad with good fundamentals — and he is only 22. But so far, the power’s been like the Loch Ness Monster; something people talk a lot about, a few people believe in, but no one’s ever seen.

    Power can be streaky, but it’s not likely someone goes two months WITHOUT A HOMER, then suddenly cranks 10 a month. If Young sees 15 homers this year, it’ll be kind of shocking. Let him maturate on someone else’s bench.

  34. BSA says:
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    Nice lightening round! good morning.

  35. Kevin says:
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    What kind of pitcher should I be going after if I offer Bruce to someone? Hamels too much? Buy low on Harang? Ervin Santana not enough?

  36. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Kevin: I think if you can get Hamels that’s a coup. Harang would be great. And I’d be happy with Ervin.

  37. p0rk burn says:
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    @Grey: Draft is tentatively scheduled for the evening of June 12th. We still need to hammer out a time so this is subject to change. Once we get the league fully running I’ll publish it and announce the URL.

  38. Emcobra says:
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    Delmon Young is strarting to look like Milton Bradley’s younger brother – the walks.

    Kevin I’d trade Bruce for any of those as much as I like him he;s still a rookie and in a month maybe batting .250.

  39. Endless Summer says:
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    I’m trying to buy low on Vlad Guerrero, maybe including Jon Rauch and Curtis Granderson in the deal. Trade Adam Dunn for Guerrero, and look to include one of the other players? I’m not sure I will settle for Dunn/Vlad straight up, even though that might be the only deal they accept. Maybe I should start with Victorino or Jay Bruce and add pieces to trade for Vlad.

  40. Endless Summer says:
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    @Kevin: Offer Bruce for Hamels straight up. You never know until you try, right? I’d look for multiplayer deals in this case because I’ve found that there aren’t many people that will do a Bruce for Hamels deal, but will do something like a Bruce and one or more other players for Hamels and one or more other players.

    Odds on your trades happening:
    Bruce for Hamels- 10:1
    Bruce for Harang- 3:2 (I like this if you want to do a one-for-one trade)
    Bruce for Santana- off (Unless they’re an Angels fan, who is that inbested in Ervin Santana?)

  41. IowaCubs

    IowaCubs says:
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    @Grey: I’m not sure what a “bust candidate” is anymore.

    I think the Yankees will try to find a way to get Posada’s bat in the lineup as much as possible. I’m in 2nd place in WHIP/ERA/K’s, so I don’t really need Zambrano, but I don’t trust my starters, so it’s a bit of self-consciousness. Or in the case of Zombrano, unconsciousness. (See… it’s a zombie joke. Do I need to explain ALL of my jokes to you people!?!)

    I need pretty much all the offensive categories except for BA.

  42. IowaCubs

    IowaCubs says:
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    @IowaCubs: Why would you ask would I trade for a pitcher then? Hmmm… Why don’t I go after another OF or something? (Why am I so introspective today?)

    @IowaCubs: Well to answer your question, IowaCubs, you should go for another bat in your lineup.

    @IowaCubs: Have you tried actually working your real job today instead of farting around with your fantasy team?

    @IowaCubs: Loved the Zombie joke, btw, but it would have been funnier if you added a fart joke in there somehow.

  43. Endless Summer says:
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    @Frank Rizzo: Delmon Young is a lot like Matt Kemp and Robinson Cano. The low OBP and strikeouts (Cano isn’t as bad as the other two with strikeouts) guarantee they are going to be streaky as hell.

  44. Endless Summer says:
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    @IowaCubs: Posada has rotator cuff tendinitis and has seen the best doctors. Rest and recovery and he should be back around June 10 to DH. He might need offseason surgery, and that could show something with the labrum. I got it off lohud blog, but don’t know how to post linds here.

    I think the real story is who do the Yankees trade for to play catcher? Maybe Jeff Clement? He’s blocked by Johjima.

  45. BSA says:
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    Peralta/Greene contemplations-
    Historically, has Green been this streaky or could he be hurt?
    I know Peralta is streaky and looking at the two of them side by side it appears they both project to be the same.
    Right now the baseball appears to be the size of a testicle of someone on steroids for Greene and Peralta might be seeing a beachball coming at him.
    Any news on the west coast as to whether or not he sat this weekend for a planned rest or a chance to hit the cage and clear his head.

    It looks like Peralta has been hitting the dingers as well as making minimum contact to get on base whereas Greene looks lost at the plate.

    Am I on track here and if so is Peralta now ready to trend backwards while Greene just has to rebound.

    Yeah Yeah I know no one knows that question, just thinking aloud here.

    SS seems to be my waterloo at this point because I have been able to make some good choices in all other positions.

  46. BSA says:
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    Torres or Rauch as third closer? I don’t have to worry (famous last words) about either one disappearing from FA because my league doesn’t believe in being here.
    Stiffest competition A is clearly a Cubs fan – can’t figure out why he picked up Marmol
    Stiffest competition B likes to add/drop based number of starts – -how’d kuroda and Beurhle work out?

  47. nick says:
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    What should I do with Co Jack & Ortiz both out ? I need a 1st baseman! Drop Dan Wheeler for Jacobs ?

  48. BSA says:
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    @Nick – grab Votto “pre-quoting Grey here” if I may be so bold.

  49. IowaCubs

    IowaCubs says:
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    @Endless Summer: I saw Jeff Clement go 5-5 and hit 3 home runs in a high school game in Des Moines. Awesome. I still believe in Posada, but I like Clement for his Iowaness the same reason I like Tom Arnold for his. (That’s right, I said it.) … I’d like to see that trade.

    @BSA: I have the same impatience with Greene, but I’m sticking with him, because I can’t trust anyone who spells their name Jhonny. I’m having the same problems with SS ever since I agreed to that Guthrie for Rollins trade. Stupid! Stupid!

  50. cockyphoenix says:
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    re: Bruce average falling
    Justin Upton started the season this year batting like .400, but of course he also started the season striking out at least once in his first 10 or so games, so we all knew it was over his head. Jay Bruce only has one strikeout to six walks since coming up. Watching him bat, I have seen him composed and judicious at the plate; he takes pitches out of the zone with confidence. I can’t bring myself to trade him just yet, not until I see some signs of rookiedom getting to him. It’s not like his value will plummet if he starts striking out, not with the buffer he currently has on that BA. Hell, I got Wainwright for Upton about 2/3 of the way through the tailspin, just before that beautiful 0-for-20 road trip.

    I thought I’d have a look at Gordon’s and Braun’s ’07 for some frame of reference for this Bruce business. Gordon came out of the gates striking out every game for the first dozen he played in, and he didn’t see a walk for over a fortnight after he got the call. For the rest of the year, Alex struck out about every four times at bat, and he actually did finish at about .250.

    Braun, on the other hand, hit a bunch of home runs and finished the season over .320. The funny thing is that he came up to the bigs and struck out as much as Gordon did–every 4 AB–and hardly walked at all, not earning a free pass until his second week in the majors. Braun finished ’07 with 30 walks and Gordon had 40.

    Sample size is the first thing I check when people throw stats at me, but Jay Bruce took 4 walks his first 2 games, and is now up to 6 walks and only 1 strikeout. He needs to face some better pitchers, but he’s homered off Hudson/Acosta and doubled off Glavine. There’s plenty of time to jump off the train, but there’s for damn sure no rush.

  51. IowaCubs

    IowaCubs says:
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    @IowaCubs: Oops! I got that confused with that Woodie Guthrie for Henry Rollins album trade I made… Still a dumb trade. I can’t get those workers rights and “Plight of the Hooverville” songs out of my head.

  52. BSA says:
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    @IowaCubs – my closet skeleton (probably why I am doomed at short)was pre-season dropping Furcal because furcal limped through the end of 2007. Then again I was a “who’s playing hot this week” player. Damn hindsight!

  53. Tony B. says:
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    I think I could wait it out till Thursday on Doumit, I don’t know what these other owners in my league are thinking, if they haven’t picked him up by now, I think it’s a good sign.

    Concering Damon and Church, I’m about middle of the pack in steals and I lead in RBI’s and HR’s. How many SB’s does Damon end up with season, 20-25? My only real stolen base guys are Furcal, Pence, Rios, and Votto (maybe even Holliday gets to 15?) The thing is, my outfield after a recent trade looks like Holliday, Hamilton, Pence, Rios, and Quentin. Damon and Church would merely be fill-ins on off days for any of those 5 or they would be playing in one of my UTL slots nightly. Do I hold onto Damon based on his steals potential for the rest of the season or go to Church and “pray” he continues to rack up RBI’s and runs?

  54. KarlJ says:
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    @Endless Summer:
    Reports here in NY are saying that Posada should be back by the end of the week. I am sure that he will be dh’ing a lot but they also have him catching and making throws to 2nd in extended spring training. It sounds like he will be catching at least a few times a week.
    I just acquired Posada for Cain in one of my leagues. I didn’t want to pay the asking price of Billingsley from the owner who had V-Mart and I was sick of the revolving door of crap I’ve had all year at Catcher (Johjima, Suzuki, Barrett)
    On another note, I just saw online that Bo Diddley died. Did Grey also mention him in one of his recent posts?

  55. IowaCubs

    IowaCubs says:
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    Is B.J. Ryan for Johnny Damon an even trade?

  56. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @KarlJ: re: Diddley — ha!

  57. I have to admit to picking up Bailey in a couple of my deeper leagues, but I am not convinced that he will add much to my roster. When in a 16 team league with 30 active roster spots, even a middling SP looks good, though.

  58. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @johnwhorfin: I agree that he’s a pickup in deep leagues. I grabbed him in a 15 team league, I’m not going to start him against the Phillies in the Bank.

  59. BSA says:
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    two roster spots available for two closers, what do you think? I love reading here and then going cherry picking in my “two start happy” add/drop league.
    Ryan, Capps, Rauch, and Torres

  60. Baron Von Vulturewins says:
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    @BSA: Just trade for a better SS. Seriously. Go out and get Orlando Cabrera. He’ll come cheap. You’ll drive yourself crazy with the likes of Khalil Greene who, despite his peacenik name, offers no peace of mind.

    @cockyphoenix: Great comment. And I agree. Obviously it’s easy to fall for someone hitting over .500, but if you watch his at-bats, he’s using the whole field, lacing singles the other way, and doing other encouraging things that good hitters do. Plus, I’m encouraged by the fact that every time Bruce’s bat hits the ball, lightning crashes.

    @BSA: Rauch is the best of this bunch by far. He’s been very good this year. I haven’t followed Capps, but he’s reliable. Torres has been good of late but his future is murky. If you pick up Ryan, I’d try to trade him — though what kind of league has BJ Ryan in the FA pool?

  61. Baron Von Vulturewins says:
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    @Grey: I’ve got a few potential deals lined up. Which scenario do you like best?

    a) Trade Torres for Youk, flip Youk for Joba, trade AGonzo for Lackey. Lose: Torres, Gonzo; gain: Joba, Lackey.

    b) Same as above except keep AGonzo.

    c) Trade AGonzo, get Lackey; wait on Zim’s health; trade Zim for Joba; keep Torres.

  62. BSA says:
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    The league I chose randomly from CBS, but don’t overly excited as their are a number of decent players in FA ryan is on my team and I can’t really move him because the majority of people in my league don’t trade or don’t want Ryan. I have been reading Torres name a lot and know Ryan is shaky, Rauch has been great and Capps name comes up quite a bit.
    Merely fishing to see if I can improve this crapshoot of a position?

    As to SS, what would you consider the top five SS that teams may be willing to move? I cannot get Rollins, already tried in a package. Yet I did get Utley from that team.

  63. Baron Von Vulturewins says:
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    @Baron Von Vulturewins: Could that post be more confusing?

    Basically, if I add Joba to Hamels, Cain, Garza, Laffey, Cabrera, do you still think I need another topline starter, a la Lackey.

    I’m good in pitching stats now but a lot of that is the Volquez Effect.

  64. p0rk burn says:
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    @BSA: I disagree with the Baron. I’d go with Torres because I don’t think Gagne is coming back for his job and even if he does it should only last a week or two. While Ryan has at times shown signs of struggling, I’d go with him over Capps or Rauch. After all, a closer isn’t worth Diddley (RIP) if his team is never in a save situation. The Blue Jays seem to be in a little bit of a better position to provide save opportunities.

  65. Baron Von Vulturewins says:
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    @BSA: Furcal might come at a discount because he’s been on the DL. Michael Young’s stats are kind of pedestrian, so you might be able to pry him loose. And Cabrera you can probably get cheap — he’s been bad and he’s undervalued in general, IMO. He could easily rebound and have two great months for the Sox. He won’t hit HRs, but he can help in AVG, runs and SBs.

    Otherwise, the top SS are all overvalued, I think: Jeter, Renteria, Tejada, etc.

    The most risky/genius move would be to get Tulowitki for pennies on the dollar, then stash him for the second half.

  66. Ross says:
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    I just flipped sizemore and rios for prince bay and ibanez. now my outfield is a little clogged with victorino quentin and bruce also being there. i want to upgrade my SS or SP. any combination of bay ibanez and guillen net me hanley? or what kind of SP should i look for grey?

  67. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Baron Von Vulturewins: Wow, you really wanna flip A-Gonzo for Lackey. You should just do it if you’re that concerned with your starters. I think you’re fine for now. I would flip Torres for Joba, if I could. Then try and flip Joba for another piece.

    @Ross: “any combination of bay ibanez and guillen net me hanley?” Not likely, but you can try. Maybe Quentin and Bruce for Hanley? Maybe Quentin, Guillen and Bruce for Hanley? Maybe Quentin for a top starter? I’m not saying Quentin’s going to fall on his ass, but remember you just picked him off waivers.

  68. p0rk burn says:
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    Orlando Cabrera isn’t worth the pixels needed to display the trade offer. I wouldn’t look to him, there *has* to be a better schmohawk out there. Then again, maybe I’m just bitter because he Effed me in the Eh for the first half of the season. He’s been a free agent in one of my leagues for close to a month now.

    But you should draft him in the RazzBall league, he’s due for a break-out.

  69. BSA says:
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    PB – You’re killin’ me with all these razzball league recs. Where do I send the check for all this great advice? Grey, why can’t you make recs like porkburns? Weren’t you just called out yesterday for not patting Chipper on the back and now porkburn gives inside scoops on razzball – Should Razzball be changed porkballs?

  70. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @BSA:@p0rk burn: I had Pork Buns for lunch. Quite tasty. What is not tasty, however, Cabrera. I’d prefer a random schmohawk with some upside than him. He’s the definition of a middling infielder. Literally. BTW, there were some additions to the glossary today. Thanks to Rudy.

  71. agar says:
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    kouzmanoff or lowell?

  72. BSA says:
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    @BVV – the team with Tulo is trade friendly and wanted to move Granderson for Vlad two weeks ago. My outfield (including bench) is currently – Vlad, Pence, Quentin, Bruce, Wells, Victorino
    He has all starters with Snellyalater rolling out this week (in other words no closers)
    As stated earlier I have Rauch, Ryan, and Paps closing with Torres and Capps available in FA

    What would you package? I also have rookie pitchers – Kershaw and Cueto, that I consider expendable – less likely to let Cueto go right now.

    Amazing how a decent outing can bring us off the cliff.

  73. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @agar: Lowell is safer with better RBI and run potential. Kouz has more upside. Depends how risky you want to be and what you have surrounding them. I’d probably opt for Lowell.

  74. Bob says:
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    Grey, I’m feeling pretty good. Someone offered me Derek Jeter for Max Scherzer, which I took. Then I offered Jeter for Papelbon. So, I started off with Max Scherzer and turned that into Jonathan Papelbon. That’s the way it’s supposed to work. Although I made about 25 offers that were either insulted or sneered at. The ironic thing is that the guy thinks he took me. But he’s got Stephen Drew at SS, so it is an upgrade for him, and I have Carlos Guillen who is a wash with respect to Jeter, notwithstanding the ‘roids. Anyway, that’s my report for the day. I guess I should do a little real work now!!

  75. agar says:
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    Grey,

    I just dropped kouzmanoff for slowey, and now have Giambi at 1b and Miggy at 3rd, with Lowell on waivers, ive got to make a decision, do I drop Giambi for Lowell, Broxton for Lowell, or sadly Scherzer for Lowell? I just don’t trust Giambi for the long haul and feel I could slot Miggy at 1b and put lowell at 3b for the year.

  76. cockyphoenix says:
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    @Bob: Scherzer to Paps, eh? Mad props.

  77. peter says:
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    @p0rk burn: I agree. Ryan was awesome in May, netting 10 saves and W. But Rauch is no slouch. In May he had 7 saves, a W, and a Loss (in a non-save situation). And he’s yet to allow an earned run in a save situation. And he’s 6’11″, which means you can easily slide him into the 5-spot and have him post up on his defender on Mondays and Thursdays.

  78. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Bob: Yes, well played indeed.

    @agar: Scherzer or Broxton. I’d opt for Broxton since Scherzer just needs an injury from Johnson or Davis to get back into the rotation. Broxton will be a middle reliever the whole year unless something happens to Saito, which doesn’t seem likely.

  79. Baron Von Vulturewins says:
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    @p0rk burn: 1) Let’s play Guess the Closer. Can you match the stats to the closer over the past month:

    Closer A: 12 IP; 8 SV; 11 K; 2.25 ERA; 1.17 WHIP

    Closer B: 12.2 IP; 5 SV; 14 K; 2.13 ERA; 1.18 WHIP

    Closer C: 12.1 IP; 6 SV; 13 K; 2.19 ERA; 0.97 WHIP

    Closer D: 13.1 IP; 1 W; 6 SV; 12 K; 0.68 ERA; 0.68 WHIP

    Answers below!

    2) Now let’s play Guess the Middling Infielder. Which shortstops posted these numbers in 2007:

    SS A: .322; 102 R; 12 HR, 73 RBI; 15 SB

    SS B: .301; 101 R; 8 HR; 86 RBI; 20 SB

    Answers below!

    Answers:

    1) A = Papelbon, B = Nathan, C = Soria, D = Rauch. The “bad teams get less saves” is a fallacy; it’s bad fantasy wisdom. Bad teams win fewer games, but they also have more close games. Consider: Paps had 37 saves last year. Kevin Gregg had 32 for last-place Florida — and he didn’t become the closer until May 15. The pitchers above are nearly identical. Now ask yourself: Where were Paps and Nathan drafted? And where were Soria and Rauch drafted?

    2) A = Derek Jeter. B = Orlando Cabrera. Eight to ten rounds of difference in draft position, at least. Jeter is overrated. O-Cab is underrated. Yes, he was very bad in the first few months this year; droppable even. But if he doesn’t outperform Shlemiel Greene and Jhonny Peralta from here on out, I will eat my sox with a side of lox.

    Thus endeth the lesson.

  80. BSA says:
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    BVV – What bar are you studying for – the FBB? Ok, in the court of fantasy baseball smack you put up a pretty good defense.

  81. BSA says:
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    BVV – What bar are you studying for – the FBB? Ok, in the court of fantasy baseball smack you put up a pretty good defense.

    Oh yeah, Dr. Seuss would be proud if he were a razzball fan.

  82. BSA says:
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    Damn hate a slow connection and when people do that double post crap – mea culpa.

  83. Bob says:
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    Update, now the Papelbon guy wants to back out of the deal. Says he made a mistake. I’m inclined to let him out of the deal. So it goes.

  84. SaltyBiscuits says:
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    Anyone notice Jay Bruce’s strange top hand adjustment during his batting stance? He kind of takes his hand off bat for a second, almost like he is fixing his jersey.

    Well, it turns out that the mechanism in question is government regulated. It was instituted to prevent Jay Bruce from using full strength during his swing, which would have sent batted baseballs thousdands of miles into the atmosphere causing damage to aircraft, satellite and migrating birds.

  85. Chase says:
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    Fielder Bay Ibanez for Rios and Sizemore….who wInS?¿

  86. Baron Von Vulturewins says:
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    @BSA: Funny thing is, I don’t ever talk smack in my regular league. It’s too gentile. But this brings out the Razz in me!*

    @Grey: Excellent glossary, btw. Yawnstipate is especially choice — with real world applications beyond baseball! Also: Wickmen. Genius.

    When I owned Wickman last year (his last year, alas) I christened him FatBob WickPants. I was proud of that.

    *This should be a slogan for RazzCola.

  87. peter says:
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    @Chase: I definitely would prefer the Fielder, Bay and Ibanez side. Even if you’re desperate for SB, that’s a lot of potential dingers to give up.

  88. p0rk burn says:
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    @BVV: If you are considering draft position your argument is not only persuasive, I’d even go so far to say its correct. The context of the original post was “which of these guys should I get now”. Are you saying that if someone offered you your choice of those 4 you would choose Rauch? If yes, glad to have you in the league, buddy. I think Grey or Rudy covered the marginal difference between the tiers of closers rather well in their pre-season material and reached similar conclusions as you. I did like Gregg last year and he was a nice ww pickup, but I’m prone to think his 35 saves in 4 months was the exception. I stand by my proposition that a closer for the Nationals doesn’t have as much value as a closer for a contender. I’m not saying you should draft the latter 8 rounds ahead of the former, but if I’m paying the same price I’m going to discriminate using the team they play for.

    Also, those stats are what led me to draft O. Cabrera this season. I don’t think he is going to post similar numbers this year. He might have better numbers than Greene or Peralta at the end of the season but I think the answer to your original question is NOTA. There is probably somebody with better potential than those jerks. Is Crosby around? Even if he gets hurt later in the season you could rock him at SS until that happens and then go pack to Cabrera (if you really want to).

    But in our razz league Cabrera is definitely the correct choice.

  89. Zebo says:
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    @everyone: I was just offered R. Cano for my J. Dye, do I jump on this or do I sit, or what? I need some opinions fast, lest the other owner is the wiser. p.s. This will be to fill my Util spot. As my OF options are Markakis, Hunter and Ellsbury, and my 2B is B. Phillips.

  90. Baron Von Vulturewins says:
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    @p0rk burn: I would def. take Rauch. Though I’m still having a hard time getting my head around a league where these guys are available in the first place.

    Ryan: Arm troubles, velocity down.
    Torres: Effective currently; erratic history; Gagne looming in shadows.
    Capps: Effective; low K #s, which both doesn’t help you now and could mean trouble in the future.
    Rauch: Young, throws hard, has been impeccable in role so far.

    So yeah, I’d take Rauch. Unless you’re worried about Cordero, but then you might as well be worried about Wickman or Dan Quisenberry. (If Cordero sees a mound this year, I’ll be surprised, unless it’s a mound of fries.) What’s the win differential going to be between the Jays and the Nats? 15 games? 85 wins vs. 70?

    That’s not enough to sway me away from the 32 year old guy coming off Tommy John and toward the 29 year old guy who’s been lights out all year and has less mileage on his elbow. He might get five less saves from here on out; his #s across the board — esp. K/9 — will be much better.

    None of the choices will be wrong, of course; in a normal league, I’d say take Ryan ’cause he’ll have more trade value (name recognition), but this clearly isn’t a normal league if he’s available in the first place.

    I said it before, I’ll say it again: Don’t sleep on Junky Closers.

  91. Baron Von Vulturewins says:
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    @Zebo: Jump on it. Always trade up in talent. You can fill holes later.

    @p0rk burn: Bobby Crosby is a fart in a bag. If you’d rather throw your lot in with him than O-Cab, I wish you luck.

  92. Zebo says:
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    @Baron Von Vulturewins: I just accepted, thanks. I hope Cano gets hot as soon as I get him.

  93. p0rk burn says:
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    @BVV: I already did that exact move. After a month of 0fers with an occasional 1/4 thrown in something had to be done. I prefer to think of it as a breath of fresh air rather than a fart bag. Semantics?

  94. Kevin says:
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    Jay Bruce for Chien Ming Wang?

  95. Hank

    Hank says:
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    Man, I swear some people in my league are crazy.
    Recent trade going through:
    Hanley Ramirez and Alex Rios for Jay Bruce Nick Markakis and Jhonny Peralta
    ugh.

    Though I suppose I benefited, as I acquired Tex from the same manager giving up H-Ram and Rios, for Quentin and Votto!

    Anyway current pitching staff is very prospect heavy:
    Volquez, Cueto, Jurrjens, Scherzer, Billingsley, Bailey, Chamberlain, Kershaw, Guthrie, Sheets, Young, and Gallagher(flier?)

    Relievers: Nathan and Kuo

    Current lineup:
    Navarro, Tex, Phillips, Cabrera, Hairston(Tulo DL’d), Dunn, Braun, Berkman, and Morneau.

    Question: Do i stand pat with a pretty solid team, I’m currently tied for 1st in H2H or do I start selling high on some prospect pitching for some more established arms? What’s Volquez value for more pitching?

  96. Baron Von Vulturewins says:
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    @p0rk burn: You say tomato, I say fartato.

    No doubt you couldn’t continue to suffer with the O-Cab, just as I finally had to stop the pain of Snell. Sometimes life brings a little Crosby — or, in my case, D-Cabrera, the Fart in a Bag(tm) of pitchers — into your life.

  97. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Kevin: It’s fair, but I wouldn’t do it. He’s only marginally better than the next guy off waivers, unless your league’s real deep and you are really hurting for starters.

    @Hank: Volquez is probably the most valuable, but I’d start selling on Joba, Kershaw, Bailey and Jurrjens. Your team is way too rookie dependent and this could get you into major problems when your playoffs come around. Not to mention, Sheets is an injury waiting to happen.

  98. Steve says:
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    @Grey: Guy with Tex wants someone in Halladay/Lackey/Hamels mould so will try and pry one of them loose and flip them for Tex.

    Guy with Lackey has already shown interest.

    As I don’t use starters, I’d be turning a waiver-wire pickup into Tex – works for me.

  99. BSA says:
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    @BVV and PB go back up to #73, I’m chewing on the Tulo idea and want some input from opposite sides of the trade table.
    If I pulled a risky Tulo trade and Cabrera is someone I don’t want to trade for my options are Crosby or Peralta.

    PB-you dropped or contemplated dropping Yukahlile?

    Aah shiznet! Just read Vlad has a jammed knee. What the heckle? Now I am thinking of breaking the cardinal rule and for the week and sitting him this week for Pence.

    There goes some trade value this week.

  100. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Steve: Oh, then, yeah go ahead and do it. Hope the guy doesn’t realize that you know have a starter that you don’t need at all and try and switch the offer.

  101. wakeNbake says:
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    Start Jo-Jo Reyes at home against Florida?

  102. BSA says:
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    Reading Steve’s comments about not using starters makes me wonder how screwy it looks in the totals if you played closers only. If the league gives equal value for wins and saves. You would take a hit on innings and Ks, then again maybe not, depending on the number of opportunities in a week.
    a. unorthodox
    b. crazy
    c. interesting
    d. porkburn should try it in razzball league
    e. all of the above

  103. Kevin says:
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    Grey@ Thanks for the tip. Maybe I will just hold on to him. This time last year I grabbed Ryan Braun and immediately offered him up for Mark Beurhle. Thank God it was rejected.

  104. SaltyBiscuits says:
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    Jurrjens dropped in my league…

    Thoughts?

    Would you drop Laffey for him?

  105. Baron Von Vulturewins says:
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    @SaltyBiscuits: Also just dropped in my league! I also have Laffey! I also am wondering how to proceed!

    Wait — ARE WE THE SAME PERSON?

  106. Steve says:
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    @BSA: I am basically trying it because it is just a different way of doing things. And because where I live (New Zealand) I am supposed to be putting the kids to bed when it’s time to be grabbing streamers! (league is H2H 5×5 plus Holds and OBP, with no starts/IP limit).
    I drafted four closers and the best MRs I could get. I aim to win Saves, Holds, ERA and WHIP each week, plus three hitting categories.
    I’m in third, so guess it’s going OK. Not logging many innings each week does leave you exposed to blowouts though. For example, this last week, Broxton’s meltdown and Street’s HR yesterday meant a possible 8-4 win turned into a 6-6 tie.
    But the week before that, I got 4 wins, 5 saves, 5 holds, 34 Ks a .32 ERA and a .64 WHIP and won every category. If my opponent had monitored his roster more carefully I might not have won wins and Ks but that’s not my problem.

  107. BSA says:
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    Alright west coast/ or anyone more capable than me of getting the latest on Vlad’s knee – what’s the news on Vlad – in or out this week?

  108. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @SaltyBiscuits: I like Jurrjens better than Laffey, but only by a hair at this point. I’d hold pat for now.

    @Steve: You got holds but no IP? Even if you weren’t in NZ, I’d say a reliever only strategy makes sense.

  109. BSA says:
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    Oh well – Missed my weekly set time – Here goes the roller coaster…….
    Than again the way it went last week for him – I can’t due much worse.

  110. Steve says:
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    @Grey: Oh – forgot to mention that there is a minimum IP each week of 9, but I always reach that without any trouble.
    The aim is really to get into a position where I can’t be beaten in any of those 4 pitching categories and then bench all my pitchers for the rest of the week, but that doesn’t seemed to have happened yet!
    And with Izzy still finding himself, I am still a closer down, but have Perez and Mike Gonzalez lurking and Devine is out there too.

  111. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @BSA: Wait, when were Vlad’s knees okay?

    EDIT: Typo.

  112. yak says:
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    Drop Snell for Rauch?

  113. yak says:
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    Thank goodness. I already did, but was freakin out a bit. I just found the site and will be a regular reder from now on.

  114. p0rk burn says:
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    Trade Rauch to BVV for his first round pick – wait, that won’t work, I doubt he’s in your league. The guy doesn’t seem to want closers if he is leaving Torres and Capps alone. This is a tough one for me to get my head around. Will he do Tulo for Vlad straight up? I don’t think he can really complain about possible injury issues with Vlad (other than historical) with Tulo’s situation. You should be fine in the OF once Wells comes back as long as he stays healthy. I heard a Bruce foul ball cured a blind man in the stands at the last Reds game, maybe he can help that wrist.

    If he pushes you could maybe package Kershaw in there. I don’t know if I personally would trade Kershaw and Vlad for Tulo; this is 2008, not 2007. If you desperately need a SS I guess you gotta make a move though.

    Final answer: Vlad for Tulo seems ok in your shoes, anything beyond that depends on how bleak your picture actually is. Don’t listen to BVV, Crosby is a serviceable option right now. Plus he has a couple of steals in his last few games. My fart smells like roses.

  115. knighttown says:
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    1′s accross the board (last) in power numbers and 11′s for pitching in an 11 team league. I’ve already moved B. Wilson and Hudson in a package for Jimmy Rollins. My hitting “looks” good with major slumpers V-Mart, A-Rod, Rollins, Pronk. OF goes 8 deep with BJ Upton (playing at 2B), Ellsbury, Bruce, Quentin, Ibanez, Dye, Tavares and Jose Guillen but I keep falling further back in HR, runs and RBI and sit 5th overall. Do I wait for these guys to break out or package an OF with a stud pitcher (F. Hernandez, Hamels, Haren, Volquez) for a big bopping 1B/DH/3B as Helton and Hafner/Laroche are currently starting opposite A-ROd. My non-stud pitchers are Kershaw, Laffey, Lilly and Jonathan Sanchez.

  116. Steve says:
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    @p0rk burn: So what does Jay Bruce’s smell like?

    What does ‘yard’ or ‘deep’ smell like?

  117. Chase says:
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    Bruce went deep again? I didn’t believe it at first.

  118. cockyphoenix says:
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    I felt a chill down my spine on the way back from work. I think it was Bruce hitting another homer

  119. SaltyBiscuits says:
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    Bud Selig has decided that Jay Bruce is no longer permitted to hold his baseball bat in the traditional fashion. From this point forward, before each at bat, Jay Bruce is given the choice to either hold the bat upside down or swing blindfolded.

  120. cockyphoenix says:
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    pshaw he could send one long with a swimming noodle

  121. BSA says:
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    @PB – I am giving Greene another week, why, because I had to get off the pot at 6:30 EST. After this week I will probably do something with vlad for tulo and move greene for crosby knowing if crosby cools and greene streaks hot I can get him or any other ss previously mentioned. We’ll see – I have week of watching and scoreboard chatting since I play this guy all week.

    Gotta love having Bruce and Utley tonight.

  122. Baron Von Vulturewins says:
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    @cockyphoenix: Jay Bruce and Frenchy both went yard tonight. I feel giddy as a schoolgirl.

    @p0rk burn: Whoa whoa wait what’s going on here? Who’s trading Vlad for Tulo? Is this the young charge who asked about SS before, touching off the infamous O-CabGate of June ’08? I wouldn’t trade Vlad for Tulo. Unless Vlad’s knees actually fell off.

    Tulo’s hurt and he sucks. You should be able to get him for… I don’t know. Jason Bay? No, no–even that is overpaying. Vernon Wells — gimpy for gimpy? Jerome Dye on a hot streak? Ricky Weeks? CoJack? Kojak?

    He’s worth investing in but don’t empty the gun into your own head to do it.

  123. Baron Von Vulturewins says:
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    @BSA: BSA? Et tu? See note above.

    @SaltyBiscuits: LOL. And I don’t usually use LOL. I only break it out for special occasions.

    A young Jay Bruce visited Cooperstown as a small boy. As he walked the halls, looking at the busts of all his idols, an elderly usher approached him. “Come this way,” the usher said. “I have something special to show you.” He led Young Jay Bruce to a secret antechamber. In the center of the room was a bust covered in a white cloth.

    “This,” said the elderly man, “is a room dedicated to celebrating the greatest player to ever play the game.” Then he pulled away a cloth to reveal a bust of Jay Bruce, made of solid.

    Young Jay Bruce laughed, then killed the elderly man and ate his heart. That man?

    Carl Yastrzemski.

    True story.

  124. Tony B. says:
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    Guthrie another QS – he just keeps rolling along

  125. BSA says:
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    I ain’t sending Vlad for a gimp. I’m dim not totally shut off. I’ll figure something out with a package – this guy wants Vlad for Grandy. I may do a DL move for a DL move – not Tulo for Vlad.
    My DL has Wells and Figgins, while at third and second I have Utley and Longo

    Thank you for the concern
    Sincerely, The Young Charge who touched off O-cabgate08

  126. Baron Von Vulturewins says:
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    @BSA: Wells for Tulo seems reasonable to me, if you have OFs to cover.

    If you have Bruce, he counts for two players.

  127. BSA says:
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    @BVV-
    I am happy with my outfield since I have Bruce covering all three outfield positions.
    Pence, Vlad, Victo, and Wells are all enjoying the view from the bench.

  128. Steve says:
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    Is it unfair to curse Bruce every time he makes an out?

  129. Baron Von Vulturewins says:
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    @BSA: Nice. And have you seen Bruce block the plate? Awesome. I once saw a runner round third, see Bruce at home, and the runner simply walked into the dugout, weeping.

  130. B.J. says:
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    Ryan Zimmerman= Guy who will never be on my team again. Waited on grabbing a 3B in both of my leagues and this piece of crap goes and tears his labrum

  131. BSA says:
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    @BVV
    …and then Bruce walk over and offered him a hanky.

  132. p0rk burn says:
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    @BSA, BVV: har har. I’m just throwing out ideas here, I thought the ingredients I had to work with were Tulo and Vlad. If the guy showed interest in Vlad he’d probably flip him in a Tulo deal. It obviously assumes Tulo is going to be good again, but like I said this is 2008 not 2007 so who knows. Sometimes you need to make a move for a piece really need. If you are stacked at a position its ok to overpay a bit. Just how much you are willing to overpay depends on the depths of your despair. Being stuck with the Fartato at SS my self, I’ve been trying to pry Tulo away from his owner since before he was hurt. I don’t have him though because I’ve kept the junk in the pants and refused to give him my left cashew for him.

    I’d deal Kershaw for him if I could but thats because I’m not sold on Kershaw. If you can get Tulo for a bag of hype and some p0rk rinds, p0rk burn says pull the trigger. As an aside someone finally picked up Kershaw in one of my leagues; I’m not sure what happened between his start against the mets and today to make him all of a sudden attractive. Beer goggles? Cueto is currently sitting there, maybe I should make a drink and pick him up.

    O. Cabrera still sucks. I’m pretty sure he’s actually from the Lake Shittycaca area of Peru/Bolivia not Cartegna, Columbia.

  133. BSA says:
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    As he was walking back to the Reds’ dugout he saw some poor young charge in the front row typing about “his”story at both sides of the plate, stopped, read it and edited for present/past agreement. BSA just sat there stupefied at his transgressions.

  134. wakeNbake says:
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    I heard a rumor that Brian Fuentes could get traded to the Yankees. If this did happen who would be the closer for Colorado. Corpas, Buchholz??

  135. peter says:
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    I’m glad I activated Smoltz.

  136. Chase says:
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    @peter: Yah I just traded Jay Bruce for him in a keeper league.

  137. BSA says:
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    OK, OK, OK – this just in,
    “According to a source, Ortiz’ wrist will be immobilized for roughly the next month to determine whether the injury can heal on its own. If it cannot, the Red Sox and Ortiz very well may face a harsh reality: Season-ending surgery.”

    Remember Nomah had a torn sheeth in his wrists.

    No this is not a fable.

  138. BSA says:
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    In other news from around the league,
    Yukahlili just struck out.

  139. Andy says:
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    Bah, I knew I should have traded Smoltz.

  140. Steve says:
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    @BSA: Just seen it on Baseball Tonight (even though its 2.47pm!) that Papi is on the DL…

  141. BigFatHippo says:
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    Bruce, Utley and Yunel.

    Gotta love em tonight.

    @pork burn

    Yer farts smell like a sack of assholes.

    Cust Kayin

  142. cruisinkc says:
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    Who wins this deal?
    Beltran for Billingsley and CC Sabathia

  143. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @cruisinkc: Billingsley and CC Sabathia side.

  144. Baron Von Vulturewins says:
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    @BSA: Oh, yowch. I am not an Ortiz owner. My heart goes out to those who are.

    @BSA: You’re criticizing my grammar here, isn’t you? You can just went to hell.

    @Chase: You traded Bruce for Smoltz? In a keeper league? Did they throw in Jesus? A hand job? Something?

    @ Aaron Laffey: Ah, we both knew it would end this way. Frankly, I got three more quality starts out of you than I had any right to expect. But I had to get greedy, didn’t I? Yes, yes I did. And you got spanked in the Texas heat. Hard. So… it’s been fun, but this is the end of the road, you soft-tossing, cockeyed-hat-wearing, ERA-shattering ex-team member of mine.

  145. Baron Von Vulturewins says:
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    @BSA: Oh, yowch. I am not an Ortiz owner. My heart goes out to those who are.

    @BSA: You’re criticizing my grammar here, isn’t you? You can just went to hell.

    @Chase: You traded Bruce for Smoltz? In a keeper league? Did they throw in Jesus? A hand job? Something?

    @cruisinkc: Beltran scares me. Most superstar players don’t suck for a whole season when not injured, but Beltran’s proved himself to be a season-sucker. See ’05. So I’ll take the two pitchers for the win.

    @ Aaron Laffey: Ah, we both knew it would end this way. Frankly, I got three more quality starts out of you than I had any right to expect. But I had to get greedy, didn’t I? Yes, yes I did. And you got spanked in the Texas heat. Hard. So… it’s been fun, but this is the end of the road, you soft-tossing, cockeyed-hat-wearing, ERA-shattering ex-team member of mine.

  146. Baron Von Vulturewins says:
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    Oh, the dread double post!

    I’ll go sit in the corner for awhile.

  147. BSA says:
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    BVV -no, killing my grammar. I am a teacher.
    Now what do you think a team with Papi on the DL is willing to do for a big bat?
    Glad it isn’t my problem.

  148. Zebo says:
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    is A. Casilla worth picking up for Util spot? Will he allow me to trade Brandon Phillips for a bigger bat?

  149. Karn says:
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    Question for you folks: Who is a better gamble between DeWitt, Vazquez, and J. Castillo?

  150. p0rk burn says:
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    @Karn: p0rk votes DeWitt.

  151. @Zebo: Casilla is a huge drop from Phillips. Hang tight with Brandon unless you get wowed. I’ve been playing MI carousel all year. So far, Orlando Hudson has proven to be the best pickup….but some bad stats from ellis, sanchez, and velez…

    @Karn: Yikes. Is your league that deep? I don’t want to bet on any of them. I guess DeWitt?

  152. Zebo says:
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    is this Ortiz thing for real? what is the exact cause? It seemed like he was fine… Damn, there goes my season.

  153. Get Figgy With It says:
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    Would you trade Jay Bruce, Adrian Gonzalez, Longoria, and BJ Ryan for A-Rod and Dan Haren?

    I am short on SP and have 4 other closers (Papelbon, Fuentes, Borowski, Wood)…I also have Tex at 1B and Atkins/Kouzmanoff at 3B

  154. Grey

    Grey says:
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    @Get Figgy With It: That trade is fair, but you’re giving up a lot. Why not just move a closer and Longoria for a starter?

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