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So I’ve been leading with pitchers all the time.  That shizz is seriously gonna get boring fast.  And believe me, I’ve been married for basically 10 years so I know boring.  I ain’t playin’ DraftKings to feel like all I got is top or bottom!  TMI?  Yeah, TMI…but I’m gonna do things a little differently because I feel like it.  And because Justin Morneau is feeling it, whatever that ‘it’ is when he can’t seem to miss the ball.  Morneau just finished a road trip to San Diego, aka Petco Park, aka the vast desert of homerunlessness and came away with a couple of doubles and a HR.  Before that, he hit a HR in San Fran in the previous series.  And now?  Morneau gets to play at home against a pitcher named Jonathan Pettibone, or ‘Mr. Bonepetter’ as he’s known on his adult film sets.  To put it mildly, Jonathan is ‘WHOOOEEEFFF’.  That’s me spelling out the sound of throwing up.  Don’t look at me strange, we all throw up differently.  The Stream-O-Nator spells throwup ‘-9′.  That’s his dollar value today.  No this isn’t golf, negative numbers aren’t good around here.  Needless to say, both I and the Hitter-Tron agree that Morneau is set up for a fine day in Denver and given his price is only $4,400 on the good ‘ole DK, it would be smart to get a least a small piece of the Rocky Mountain High that’s sure to come.  Not that kind of high.  Unless you’re actually in Colorado.  Then it’s totally cool and legal.  Wait, aren’t we still teaching D.A.R.E. in school?  You so crazy, .gov.  Speaking of cool and legal, before we move onto the picks for the day, I wanted to remind you of the Sweet Spot like my wife does like all the time…TMI again?  Oops…anyways, sign up to DraftKings via our promo and get a free ticket.  You win with said free ticket, you get a shot at working your way into said Sweet Spot for free and get to take a picture with me as I take your oversized check and run away with it down the hill like Shooter McGavin does with Happy’s jacket.  But enough about my impending thievery, let’s do this.  Here are the Razzball picks for the 4/18/2014 slate over on DraftKings…

Nathan Eovaldi, SP: $9,000 – So his recent line of 6 IP and 4 ER with 5 K for 12.1 DK points wasn’t sexy.  I get that.  But here’s what I also get.  A K:BB ratio of 19:1 in 19.1 IP.  That’s pretty good.  An unlucky LOB% of 61.2 and an xFIP of 2.83 also tells me he’s pitched better than what his overall line is telling us.  The third thing I know?  Mariners are traveling from Texas after 4 games and this’ll be their first game after said flight.  Yes, they’re athletes but they’re also human.  I could see Nathan getting a tired and ragged M’s team caught napping for a win and 7 or 8 Ks.

Sonny Gray, SP: $10,200 – Houston Hello!  That’s all I can really say right now.  Even Keith Olbermann couldn’t get this team En Fuego.  They’re currently second worst in team K% at 25.1 and – not surprisingly – own the worst BABIP because of it at .220 on this young 2014 season.  Gray will probably walk a few guys but given that the Asstros can’t buy a hit, this is gonna be a matchup to take advantage of.

Drew Smyly, SP: $6,700 – You want cheap?  I’ll give you cheap.  The Emoticon is someone I’ve already said many superlatives on via his very own Drew Smyly Fantasy Baseball Sleeper post.  If Preseason dreaming doesn’t give you what you need to know, consider he’s already thrown 6 innings this year, over which he has 6 Ks, 1 walk, and only 2 hits.  How happy would you be if that were his end line?  Yup.  Keep in mind he’ll be restricted a bit on pitch count so he’ll have to be efficient to cash for you.  I’m not a used car salesman over here.  I let you know when your pitcher might have a wonky clutch, if that’s something that a car can have.  Clearly I’m not a car guy.  So now you understand why I don’t try to sell them with a toupee and covered in plaid and pastel colors.  I have plenty of better things to do with that kinda wardrobe!

Justin Turner, 1B/3B: $2,700 – A punting we will go, a punting we will go.  High ho the Daily Leagues, a punting we will go.  Pitching’s gonna be expensive on this day.  Don’t fight it, just accept it and move on.  Of course, this is me assuming Hanley Ramirez isn’t back from getting a fastball off his left hand.  I know I wouldn’t be.  The Diamondbacks have been a mess all year.  If Turner is batting in the 2 spot, I’ll take him as a mighty 3B punt option and work my lineup up elsewhere.

Eric Hosmer, 1B: $3,700 – An even cheaper option than Morneau at 1B.  Eric has been not very Hosm but the Hitter-Tron has him in the Top 20 hitters for today, making him Hosm and possibly Hosmer than he usually is.  Get it?  Nice, internet high five!  Now triumphant Wyld Stallyns air guitar solo!  And now let’s move on because that was extremely stupid.  Let us never mention it again.

Scott Van Slyke, OF: $2,800 – You’d think this is just more punting biz but it’s really not.  Those D-Backs are like really bad right now, bro, and Van Slyke has been getting most LHP at-bats over Crawford so far.  In fact, yesterday, he was 1/3 with a run, BB and his hit was a double.  And that was against Madison Bumgarner.  Wonder what he’ll do against Wade MileyWait, I know what he’ll do…it’s definitely not gonna be in the Vegas lines section but that 7 in Dodgers stadium might be all Dodgers runs.  Take advantage of discounts here and buy heavy elsewhere.

I’m Only Happy When It Rains

There looks to be no major Mother Nature problems screwing with our game today.  That’s good!  But do note that the winds are expected to blow in from Left Field in Wrigley tomorrow, cutting down on HRs hit that way possibly.  That’s bad!  But they’re the only game that’s not a part of the evening slate so we’re safe.  That’s good!  Yeah, basically nothing to report here.  Eventually we’ll fill this section with weather man images that amuse us.  Oh Pettibone!  We have a job for you!

Doing Lines In Vegas

COLvsPHI at 10 1/2: When the game is in Colorado, it’ll always top the vegas line taco.  Chatwood has pitched decently so if I’m stacking here, it’s with Rockies players.

TEXvsCHW at 10: This game just looks weird to me.  Texas hasn’t been in the business of scoring a buncha runs since 2013 really and Martin Perez may not be K’ing a buncha guys but he looks good.  The under could happen here but if I’m buying into a lineup, I’d go with the Rangers stack due to a fatigued bullpen and Felipe Paulino on the mound.

KCvsMIN at 8 1/2: Next highest scoring game.  Not really huge into this one as even when the Royals score, it ain’t that exciting.  They have the lowest HR total in the league, 20th best in doubles and they’re 17th in SB.  Eh, why did I suggest Hosmer again?  With Ricky Nolasco on the mound, anything is possible but I wouldn’t get too crazy here.

TBvsNYY at 7 1/2: So if the Yankees can score 7 ERs off of David Price, just think what they can do against Erik Bedard.  Seven seems like a low run total for a team that just scored 10 on the Rays’ ace and the bullpen.  Filling your remaining lineup with Yankee parts wouldn’t be a bad idea.  Starting Erik would.  In fact, I’d say you’re completely Bedard’ed if you did.

From Around The Web

  1. Grey

    Grey says:
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    For the record, that is the sound of Sky’s throw up… I know firsthand…

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      HEY! That’s…true…sighs…

  2. malamoney

    malamoney says:
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    Never go full Bedard!

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      Ha! I wanted to weave that in, but couldn’t find a way. Thank you, sir.

  3. JoeBuckYourself says:
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    The yankees have a history of beating up aces and then completly going limp cold vs stupid pitchers they should beat

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      I’m sure plenty of teams have that in their wheelhouse; wouldn’t call that Yankee-specific nor something to hang your hat on with Daily Fantasy.

      • JoeBuckYourself says:
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        @Sky: thats it, im starting Erik Bedard and will come tomorrow for better or for worse and It will be for better and i will gloat as victory will be mine, not yours, mines

        Bedard : 5 2/3 3 Ks 4BB’s 3ER’s for the win, for the win!

        • Sky

          Sky says:
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          Haha do it my man do it!

  4. elipitt says:
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    Nice call on Van Slyke!

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      Haha, thanks man!

  5. costaricanchata says:
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    a few clunkers in here .
    (smyly ??)
    off-set by the wyld stallyns link .
    (heavy metal !!)

    also ,
    have never seen a car with ” a toupee and covered in plaid and pastel colors.”
    got a link ??

    obviously , your best call —> “go with the Rangers stack due to a fatigued bullpen and Felipe Paulino on the mound.”

    are you making any $$ with this gambling site ,
    or is it one of those ‘don’t quit your day job’ sort of thing ??

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      @costaricanchata: I’m cashing actually but I don’t play the mega-bucks ones where you have to throw in huge to make anything. I’m not quitting my day job but I’m also not taking on a 2nd and 3rd job to make up for anything so I’m doing just fine.

      Yeah, the announcers were mentioning Smyly hadn’t pitched in about 2 weeks. Hadn’t thought about the layoff. He started sharp and then went shart. Was frustrating all around as I own him in regular and started him everywhere while benching Gio/Masterson in the same leagues.

      Oopsie on the car salesman vs car. Was off playing basketball until 11 and didn’t finish writing until about 1 am. Usually give my write up another look in the morning but didn’t have time.

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      @costaricanchata: Wait a minute…now that I’ve checked your car statement, think you misread it. Either way, have a good one!

  6. Ghost of the Disappeared says:
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    Sky: Morneau, I liked in ESPN. Didn’t last in my RB league quite long enough – as many were using RB draft sheets where he was pushed forward.

    He was primed for a nice bounce back year and is doing it. Good for him.

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      @Ghost of the Disappeared: I agree, he’s looked good. Hopefully the concussion issues are behind him now. You just never know with that kind of thing how it will affect a guy. Morneau just might hit .320 this year. If he tops 20 HRs with that, he’s definitely a top 10 1B and a top 100 player with where he bats in that lineup.

  7. Frank White says:
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    Hey Sky.. Would you trade Fielder for Peavy and Buehrle?? My pitching is in trouble

    • Frank White says:
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      I came so close winning the Basketball championship bu got 2nd. Good thing e split the pot 60-40, Lol but Thanks so much for all your help buddy!! Anway I’ve had nothing but bad luck on my pitching squad. Lol. But seriously with injuries and pitchers playing so horrible I had to drop but I had to pickup about 5 pitchers off the wire to add to my squad and not stream. Moore is out for the season, ( Which is a blessing in disguise) and Cobb on my DL. This is my whole lineup, 10 team mixed h2h points…
      Wieters
      Fielder
      Gyorko
      Elvis Andrus
      Adam Jones
      Jay Bruce
      Alex Gordon
      Cuddyer
      Desmond Jennings
      George Springer

      Alex Wood
      Jason Vargas
      Masterson
      Robbie Erlin
      Bumgarner
      Samardzija
      Homer Bailey
      Eovaldi
      Jesse Chavez
      Erasmo ( I’m dropping Him)
      Cobb DL
      Paxton DL ( Only reason why I’m keeping him is because I get 2 DL spots and I’m gonna Replace him with 1 of Seth’s grab n stash guys)
      Glen Perkins
      Jose Valverde
      So after picking the guys up off waivers, which are pretty clear who they are, Lol.. 1 – Do you think I have a good squad or do you think I’m heading for more disaster?? I’ll pickup prospects like I always have done but I got a while for that. On top of my injuries I got Masterson and Bailey pitching like crap and some other pitchers doing great but can’t get a win cause batters and bullpen killing them. 2 – Any advise for me?? I’m 0-2 right now with close scores in both but not getting wins are killing me cause it’s 20 points per win an a point per K and inning. Oh and I just picked all these pitchers recently and they haven’t pitched yet so I’m 0-2 without those new guys. Sorry If I was rambling but I just wanted to give you all the details. LOL.. Thanks!!!

      • Sky

        Sky says:
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        @Frank White: It’s too early to worry about your guys. Masterson just went almost 7 and struck out 9. Bailey struck out 9 around his bad start where the wind was blowing out in a hitters ballpark. You just need to give your team some time.

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      @Frank White: That would be an atrocious trade. No.

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