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Whenever I hear the classic Donovan tune, Atlantis, I’m taken back to that magical moment in Goodfellas when Tommy and Jimmy return to the bar to ice Billy Batts for his snide shine box remark. Well, that used to be the case; that is until DraftKings announced their Fantasy Baseball Championship in the Bahamas with a million bucks going to the winner! Hail, Atlantis indeed (the resort, get it?). Beach body (or lack thereof) be damned – I want in. I really shouldn’t encourage the competition, but you too can win your way to wonderland for as little as $2. So, get cracking and start stacking, because time’s a wasting and those qualifiers fill faster and faster every day.  So let’s get on with the pickins…right after I point you back to the brand spanking new Razzball Tool.  Four ladies and gentlemen (and I use that term loosely), I bring you the DFSbot care of our resident Miles Bennett Dyson, Rudy Gamble.  Wanna know if a guy is cheap or expensive for the day on the good ‘ole DK?  Well take a gander.  Go on, I’ll still be here and so will the picks…ok, maybe you’ve gandered long enough, let’s get on with our day here.

Yordano Ventura @ SD ($9,400) – Ace Ventura makes the voyage to whale’s vagina to face the Padres, who are dead last in OPS versus RHP (.580) with the fourth-most strikeouts (203). Ks on DraftKings are like chicken wings to Tommy Boy, so me likey Yordano.

Nathan Eovaldi vs NYM ($9,200) – I’m no Phil Ivey. I’m tipping my hand here and exposing Eovaldi as my SP2 du jour, but I can’t be alone, right? He holds a respectable 8.22 K/9, and his 10% LD% and 55.5% GB ratio makes you feel warm and fuzzy … as does the run support Miami provides at home. Not to mention, the Mets (as a team) have the sixth-most strikeouts (262) and second-lowest OPS (.639) in baseball.

Giancarlo Stanton vs NYM ($5,300) – There are four OF pricier than Giancarlo – funny – that’s how many HR he could possibly hit off of Jonathan Niese tonight. Stanton has an absurd (in an awesome way) OPS of 1.232 against LHP at home this season. It’s like Game Genie is plugged into his bat. Hands down, he’s my first hitter rostered, and I’ll figure out a way to make the rest work with what money’s left, even if I’m forced to play Derek Jeter’s rotting corpse.

Pedro Alvarez vs SF ($3,600) – This is dirt cheap for a dude who can dole out double dongs on any given night. It doesn’t hurt that Yusmeiro Petit is on the mound as Matt Cain is heading to the DL with a split somewhere on him that’s not his backside. Over 235 innings as a starter, Petit has a 4.79 ERA.  Meanwhile, Cain has a 4.05 ERA as a starter over his last 215.1 IP.  Basically just telling you El Toro was gonna see red either way.

Danny Valencia @ SD ($2,900) – This former Twin and current pretty boy could be my favorite punt option of the night. He can be used to your liking as long as that’s at 2B or 3B, but more importantly, Valencia has a career .362 OBP against LHP. And wouldn’t you know it; there’ll be a southpaw on the bump in San Diego.

Adeiny Hechavarria vs NYM ($3,400) – I know I’m not touching on many teams here, but hey, I did reference stacking earlier, so hopefully you’re reading between the lines when it comes to the Marlins in their own park. Hechavarria (the H is silent BTW) is hitting .474 versus LHP at home and that can’t be ignored … especially at that price. Bonus: he also has dual-eligibility (3B/SS) and is averaging nearly 11 DK points per game during the current home stand.

Leonys Martin @ COL ($3,500) – After a slow start, Martin has at least one hit in 14 of his last 16 games. He’s a threat to go yard (playing in Coors helps) and/or swipe a bag. I’m calling he accomplishes at least one of those feats but praying he doubles down. Martin’s price has recently been upwards of $4,500, so I reckon this is a steal for the adopted Texan.

I’m Only Happy When It Rains

There’s not much to fret on the weather front, but with a 30% chance of rain that extends late into the night, we need to keep our eyes on Washington – the district not the state.

Doing Lines in Vegas (2-0 Overall)

The only reason I nailed both picks last week was because I had zero action on them, and therefore, they couldn’t be jinxed. The song remains the same for this week’s picks, so they should be considered stone cold locks:

TEX +110 at COL – Rangers’ bats are warming and they’ll launch balls in Coors’ thin air

Over for TOR at PHI (9) – J.A. Happ facing Kyle Kendrick in hitters’ paradise? Yes, please.

  1. Joe says:
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    Would you trade Carlos Beltrán for alex cobb?

    • BTXJ

      BTXJ says:
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      @Joe: sorry see below

  2. BTXJ

    BTXJ says:
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    absolutely if your pitching has been managing w/out him. beltran will warm with the weather.

  3. JP says:
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    Would you trade Cueto/Morse/Kemp for Belt/Chris Davis (H2H Keeper League , all can be kept except Belt)

    • BTXJ

      BTXJ says:
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      @JP: i think cueto is a good sell high right now, but think you can get more here…

      • JP says:
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        Thanks.

  4. white sox guy says:
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    shocked u dont have more rockies exposure im all in on them tonight do like martin though but think barnes/stubbs could be better value.

    • BTXJ

      BTXJ says:
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      @white sox guy: didn’t have lineups avail when i wrote this. those guys are most def in play

  5. JVrox says:
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    Pujols/Iwakuma for Morneau/Scherzer, which side wins?

    • Chicken Dinner says:
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      @JVrox: Pujols

  6. ryan says:
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    My pitching is in shambles and the only possible upside option out there is Stroman. I need to drop one of my hitters to pick him up and my options are pretty much Springer, Dom Brown or Seager. Who’s the best option to drop out of these 3? All are UTIL guys or backups.

    My roster is kind of a mess so dropping a pitcher isn’t really an option.

    • BTXJ

      BTXJ says:
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      @ryan: damn, did it again. see response below.

  7. BTXJ

    BTXJ says:
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    if this is a keeper league – it’s springer. seasonal leagues, i’ll give slight edge to seager over brown w/springer in third. pitchers to keep eye on that should be promoted soon are meyer (MIN) and heaney (MIA). add them if you have a spot to burn. they are immediate impact guys.

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