Clap along if you feel like that song got overplayed (Cuz it’s crappyyyyyy). Clap along if you feel like Pharrell should’ve never sang (Cuz it’s crappyyyyyy). Clap along if you know he coulda done a better thang (Cuz it’s crappyyy). Clap along if you feel these lyrics are just a drain (Cuz they’re crappyyyyyyy). Now don’t get me wrong, I’m a huge Pharrell Williams fan…back when he was a producer as part of The Neptunes duo. The man knows music inside and out and it’s pretty clear he knows how to stick good tunes in your head. Hell, even N.E.R.D. was boss. Yeah, yeah, he sang…if you think the Beastie Boys sing. Let me put it to you this way. I’ll listen to Britney Spears. It’s one song. It’s ‘I’m A Slave 4 U‘ and not out of any sense of irony or wry humor. It’s all cuz of Pharrell. Granted, I do it with the vocals stripped but whatever, you get the point: the man knows his beats and has a huge musical vocabulary. Jazz, do-wop, 70′s soul, punk, disco…the man is a walking classics playlist with his own flare. What does all this have to do with J.A. Happ you ask? Eh, nothing really. I just wanted to riff on Pharrell for a bit. Before he was gathering Grammys with a weird hat, he was dropping quality track after quality track…and winning Grammys. So basically nothing’s changed and the same can be said of Happ. He’s still not a good pitcher. But that doesn’t mean he can’t drop a quality start in the middle of of his mediocrity, especially when given such a prime matchup. The Royals are either at or near the bottom of the barrel in terms of team wOBA, ISO, and OBP against lefties on the year. Now that doesn’t make J.A. a safe bet, of course, but when you look at his price of $6,300 over on DraftKings, you have to consider how much he’ll aid you in rostering some bigger bats for a full Friday slate. So now that we’ve covered the important things in life – Pharrell’s discography and Happ still being a bad pitcher with a good matchup – let’s give this Friday slate a whirl, shall we?
Marco Estrada, SP: $8,800 – I appreciate the price reduction on Estrada, DK, I really do. Cubs have the 4th worst road wOBA and the 5th highest team K-rate on said road. Call me crazy…sorry, just a minute, my phone is ringing off the hook…*sighs*. I didn’t mean you should literally call me, I was in the middle of typing over here! Just text me that I’m insane next time, ok? Thanks. Back to what I was saying, Estrada could be in for a big 10 K day given the matchup. Put all your CHiPs in.
Corey Kluber, SP: $10,300 – Who is he facing today? The Orioles? Haha, no silly, he just throttled them…IN Baltimore. Oh it’s Colorado? Well that’s a different story. Let me go in my way back time machine and produce my Corey Kluber Sleeper post whilst I remind you he went 7 strong against the Tigers about 2 weeks ago for 8 K and 3 ER. Yeah, he’s creeping into ‘just start him’ territory. Enjoy.
Bronson Arroyo, SP: $6,800 – Not as excited as I was with starting Josh Collmenter yesterday but still it’s silly to fight a low price against a floundering team. The question here is more a fade or not to fade sitch. I could see the merits in fading. I could see the merit in starting him as well. Basically I see merit in all of you, for better or worse. What are you, Boy Scouts? Badges all around!
Colby Lewis, SP: $6,100 – Given the stats on the year, I have no business suggesting Colby. I honestly don’t have a good reason even not looking at that other than the Nats are just an average or slightly below average offense and Lewis has proven to be a decent pitcher since joining the Rangers. If you prefer Pepperjack, I understand. Moving on…
Josh Willingham, OF: $3,400 – The Voluntary Pig is here to serve you. I was all over him like apple sauce on pork chops on Wednesday and was nowhere near him yesterday but given the pitcher, the park, the price….I’m hearing the sooey calls over here. While we’re on the subject of bacon-twinkies, let’s go hog wild here and suggest a Twins stack that would include Trevor Plouffe and Brian Dozier. And it goes without saying any team that faces Ricky Nolasco also gets stackable treatment. But if I don’t say it, how would you know? These are questions I have to ask myself.
Xander Bogaerts, 3B/SS: $3,800 – As yesterday proved, the Xandy man can against left-handed pitching, even when it’s Mike Minor. With that said, David Price has been very up and down so far this season and has actually pitched better on the road than he has at home so far. This is a ‘play it safe’ call here and probably better for cash games than tourneys.
Mark Reynolds, 1B/3B; $4,200 – He’s not cheap but he’s not overpriced either. If I were Goldilocks, I’d say he was juuuuust right. With a lefty on the mound and being at home, this one should turn into a Brew-Ha-Ha in short order. The Brew stack is in full play here, peeps.
Tommy Medica, 1B: $3,200 – I don’t care about him falling a single short of a cycle, that’s not why I’m on him. He was brought up due to injury and to hit left-handed pitching. John Danks is on the mound. Danks is a left-handed pitcher and I use the ‘pitcher’ term loosely. He’s more of a BP machine. Unhappy with your current 1B insurance? Buy Medica (offer only available in MN, ND, SD, WI…oh and DraftKings of course).
Edwin Encarnacion, 1B: $5,200 – There’s no discount here and for good measure. Dude just hit two bombs off of Big Game James yesterday. Today he gets Jason Vargas. 2bgf-9320fjaq['323=qaf30j3...Sorry, all the blood in my head went 'somewhere else' and I passed out on the keyboard there out of excitement. Toronto is yet another stackable game. If there's one thing I highly recommend to all of you, it's to have at least one B-Jay today.
J.J. Hardy, SS: $3,500 – Dongs, schlongs…hrm, that one doesn’t quite work. What I’m trying to say is you don’t need a HR from Hardy to cash on him as he’s had four 10+ point scoring games over his last 10 games and gets to face another guy you could stack against tonight in Brett Oberholtzer. Yes, I’ve given you at five stack options on the day. The question is, which one will be the best? There can be only one!
I’m Only Happy When It Rains
They say April showers bring May flowers. Apparently Boston didn’t get the memo it’s already May and almost June as there’s a 50% chance of rain set for most of the day in Beantown. For that reason alone, you can avoid the starting pitchers. That STLvsSF game also looks a bit dangerous with scattered thunderstorms and a 50% chance of precipitation but it was like that yesterday and there wasn’t even a rain delay. Maybe they’re so scattered they’re not even near STL when they report these things. It’ll probably rain in Eugene. Maybe we’re at least 2% of that, you never know!
Doing Lines In Vegas
HOUvsBAL, NYYvsMIN, and TORvsKC are all at the over/under of 9 for the day. I fully expect the Yankees game to get out of hand fast on both sides. I’d consider both sides stackable but you already know that from my love notes above. Honestly, there’s too much good stuff here and I can’t see any of those games not going to the over. On the other side of the coin, Vegas thinks STLvsSF is the low-scoring game of the day. Here’s to those scattered storms staying scattered and starting the two aces against each other.