When Grey asked me if I wanted to be the creeper of the week, I thought I was being scolded for inappropriate behavior in the comments section. What a relief it was when I found out I would get to write for the readers on a weekly basis talking about Creepers. After doing some research, I’ve found out that to be a good creeper you need a good pair of binoculars, a really nice van, and a list….lipstick optional. Unfortunately I didn’t need the binoculars or the van to write this article, but I’ll keep them anyway. Though the list has been valuable and the lipstick is quite empowering, I think it it’s time to get this party started. I started with a list and whittled it down and realized there were too many young guys people have taken flyers on. But what I did see was a lot of veteran streaky hot schomatato types. As I sat here digging through the piles of the unwanted to find that one guy that should be available in most 12-team leagues and usable in terms of SAGNOF, HR’s, great park/matchups, I came across a name we all know and love to hate…..Adam Dunn (14.3% owned).
Before I move on to the meat of this sandwich I want to pledge to you Razzicans of the fantasy baseball kind to be the most honorable creepiest Creeper I can be. I will do my best to live up to the high bar set by last years creeper, my former football editor and the man that gives gas as a gift……Sky. My creepers will be less than 20% owned in ESPN and be usable in the next week to plug and play. [Ed. Note– That’s what she said.]
The other day I came across this not so great movie that had a great concept, but failed to capitalize on the pure genius of that concept by plugging in bad actors. I think it’s ready and ripe for a re-make. The plot described as “A homicidal escaped mental patient with a brain tumor and only a month to live meets a childlike mentally challenged traveling companion for a cross-country car trip that brings unexpected meaning to both their lives“. The not-classic Homer and Eddie stars Whoopi and John Belushi’s little brother in a road trip buddy flick where who really cares what happens in the end. It’s not worth watching, trust me, and plays right into my creeper of the week title. Adam Dunn is a part of hollywood these days after his acting debut (no lines) and monetary investment into the Academy Award winning Dallas Buyers Club. If anyone out there is big enough to pull off playing two roles, it’s the Donkey. Just as he can kill your team batting average real quick, he can also blast home runs in bunches that will make you as giddy as Smokey in Amsterdam. One thing I learned is when your season starts, you want to get counting stats early and often. It gives you the fuzzies and makes you believe this will be the year. Adam “the Donkey” Dunn has some great match-ups in the first 8 games of the 2014 season and a chance to hit a few HR’s. He opens the season vs. the Twins against three right-handers, and gets them in the hitter friendly U.S. Cellular Field. Most particularly, he gets Kevin Correia who he has a .3oo avg and three home runs against. Next he travels to Kansas City where he gets two more right handed pitchers and the lefty he has some of his best success against, Bruce Chen (.333 avg and 2HR). Over the last two years Dunn has hit 12 HR’s vs. the Twins and 10 vs. the Royals….bullpen beware. One last thing, after the KC series, he has a trip to Colorado that may or may not lead to any at bats, but I would hold him and see if he gets a rogue start against one of their right-handed pitchers.
Before I leave you, I want to do a little promoting for our Razzball Radio host and the man who has been advising you on a weekly basis…..Mr. Nick Capozzi. He’s the one holding Grey and helping Kenny Chesney stand up. We are kicking off the Razzball Radio You Tube Channel where you can go to view all of Nick’s video’s….sorry guys, only the ones that relate to Razzball. Show your support for Nick, Grey, Rudy and all of the Razzball Universe by subscribing to our channel…..you have been advised!