Did you end up saying Jay one more time? I dared you after all… which makes sense if you remembered last week’s creepy get together, as we partook in my glorious proclamation that Jon Jay was a good thing for your 21st week of scoring. Also, that Kevin James was his own stimulus bill for the candy bar industry. And by that I mean he’s fat. Which reminds me, randomly, that I read this past week that there was a new picture of ol’ Nessie revealed to the public. And that this picture has thrust the legend of the Loch Ness Monster back into our snaky ocean thingamajig-starved souls. After my own careful examination, it looks like George Edwards, protagonist of our yearning, Scottish skipper, and said photographer of this discovery, has actually found a floating poop-stained bowling pin. But I’m no expert in photography, I just own a Nikon. Which I’m glad I brought up because it allows me to talk about Ashton Kutcher. Actually, let me rephrase that. It allows me to mention Ashton Kutcher, quickly skip over him, and then proceed to talking about ‘Demi Moore’s bush’. See the thread there? No, you don’t, because bush is distracting. If you want to journey further, you’ll have enter those three magic words into your Google and let the amazing NSFW happen. Now that you’ve had a chance to partake, let me confirm with you, it’s an epic bush. In fact, in a movie I watched last Easter Sunday, about, I’m not quite sure… I think it was about a dirty wizard hobo playing with lamb’s blood and yelling at Jews. But in that movie, I had found a bush similar in size and proportion, and that thing set itself on fire. Random, self-combustion… those things have the power of angry Jean Grey! That’s the level we’re playing on folks. And where does all this lead to? I’m not terribly sure, but if you see Kevin James coming at you, drop that Snickers bar, or you’ll be seeking your own Saywatanayo after thirty years of anal intrusion.
So, it looks like a noticeable trend is appearing. Once I find a suitable Creeper, they lose steam soon thereafter. I will try harder by doing a montage training scene. I’m done, and now need to do a montage eating scene to make up for all that hard work. Jon Jay looked promising, and quickly gave us a 2-for-4 performance on Tuesday, with a home run and 2 RBI’s. That’s the sweet. The 3 for 18, albeit with 2 BB’s, soon thereafter, was the sour. While it’s true that you can’t truly know how good the sweet is without knowing the sour, except in terms of poultry, I would rather you pick up players that only give you the sweet. With that, I bring you Ruben Alou’s doppelganger and this week’s Creeper: Moises Sierra.
After hitting 319/391/529 in Triple-A, Sierra was called up last week and has been on fire since. Now, it’s known that Las Vegas can inflate numbers, but there has been a noticeable improvement in skills, enough so that Alex Anthopoulos, who many believe is the best thing since sliced bread and pornhub.com, has been convinced to go with the 23-year-old right-handed hitter in the roster spot created from Travis Snider’s trade and Joey Bats’ wrist. He stands at 6’0″ and 225 pounds, and has one plus offensive tool — raw power. While having decent speed, Sierra’s base running awareness seems to be a work in progress. Despite making above average contact, his lack of pitch recognition and impatience at the plate will be taken advantage of by Major League quality pitching. But that doesn’t mean he can’t be useful. So far, in 42 AB’s, Sierra’s hitting a robust 333/349/500. Of course, the SSSS (Small Sample Size Stupid) theme applies here. However, if you are looking for some power for the stretch run, Sierra just might be able to help.
For next week’s scoring period, the Toronto Blue Jays and Moises Sierra will be facing the Tigers and the Orioles. Rawr. That was my tiger, if you were wondering. Max Scherzer is first up on Tuesday, bringing with him advanced stat madness. Holding an underwhelming ERA of 4.41, his FIP of 3.68 and 11.39 K/9 paint a much different picture. While his last start against the Twins was a 10 K, 4 HA gem, he had given up one home run each in his past 7 starts before that. Next up is the righty, Anibal Sanchez. Like Scherzer, he is also under-performing his 3.87 FIP with a middling ERA of 4.52. While Sanchez’s K/9 of 7.83 is adequate, it’s a far cry from his 9.26 K/9 in 2011. That being said, Detroit might have a little buyer’s remorse going on here. Since coming over from the Marlins, he has sucked my Anibals by giving up 18 ER’s and 35 hits in only 20 Tony the Tiger innings. Scheduled to go against Justin Verlander next, there’s nothing really here that needs to be said. Chances are the entire Blue Jays’ roster will be in for a rough day. On Friday, Sierra will have a reprieve, facing-off against Zach Britton and his ouchie FIP of 6.48. While he allowed no runs in his last start against the Tigers (7 IP, 5 K’s), the lack of control (3 BB’s) was still a constant and he hasn’t quite gotten into a groove a year removed from his rookie campaign. Wei-Yin Chen is up next, and bringing with him peripherals that make any Yu Darvish owner cry dirty tears to be later used as anti-depressant lubricant. But, for Sierra’s sake, Chen can get a little hit-happy, giving up 18 in his last two starts of 10 IP total. Though not officially scheduled as of this writing, Miguel Gonzalez should round out the 22nd scoring week on Sunday. Doing a fairly good job so far in his first taste of the Majors, Gonzalez already has 5 wins and a 3.38 ERA for the wild-card contending O’s. But regression is soon to come, as his deflated BABIP of .253 and inflated LOB% of 86.2 has lead to 4.95 FIP.
Fair warning, once Jose Bautista comes off the DL sometime next weekend, there is a chance that Moises Sierra might be sent down to make room. I don’t quite believe those reports right now, especially with the way he’s hitting. Do note though, if he does get sent down, he’ll most likely return on Sept. 1st when rosters expand. Regardless, expect a baseline of 250/300/450 with maybe a few more SB’s. But there is a definite chance for him to keep over-performing for a bit and provide a 280/320/500. If you are looking for a week long gamble for some power, you have my creepy blessing. Not to be confused with my creepy staring, which technically counts as our first date.