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Age ain’t nothin but a number, baby.  And speaking of numbers, what’s yours?  Oh you’re here with friends and you’re just at the bar getting their drinks?  But you only have one…hello, where are you going?  I knew I should’ve shaved my ear hair before going out tonight…and scene.  I give you this painful glimpse into an aging man’s world so that you might better understand this week’s Creeper Of The Week.  Getting old sucks. Getting wasted and passing out is no longer considered cool, it usually gets you fired.  Your smoking hot girlfriend who used to go out and party with you is now your wife and wishes you’d grow up.  Muscles you didn’t even know you used or had begin to ache even with the slightest change to your exercise routine.  You stretch and you warm up, ready to take these fools on the court out. You think you look like Black Mamba out there but in reality, you just look like Will Ferrell from Semi-Pro minus that sweet frickin’ afro.  Like I said, reality hits you hard bro and that definitely happened to Eric Chavez and his HOF career gone wrong.  This man has pretty much lived on the DL since about 2006 and at age 35 there’s no reason to think that’ll stop.  So with all that, why should you be interested in Eric for week 8 of the 2013 fantasy baseball season?  Follow me to the second paragraph to find out and make sure to bring a walking cane…

Chavez used to be a premier power hitter at a position that was thin on talent for a while in 3B.  From 2001 to 2005, Eric smacked 151 HRs all while playing half his games in Oakland Coliseum, a yard not known for letting power hitters thrive.  And then the dings began.  His 2006 season was 137 games.  His 2007 one 90. Well, you get the trend and it didn’t really ever stop.  This all to say, these are the reasons why no one seems to own Eric Chavez right now – 7% in both ESPN and Yahoo leagues – despite how well he’s playing.  How well, you ask?  Heading into Saturday, guess who leads the league in hits over the last 7 days?  Go on, I’ll wait…still waiting…c’mon, really?  I kinda set this up for you pretty well, just take a guess!  Of course it’s Eric.  He’s 20/34 during that span with 2 homers and 10 RBIs.  But he’s so old!  Yeah, I know, and I can’t promise you can count on him playing every game this week but given how he’s swinging the bat, it might be hard for the coaches to take him out, especially given his slate.  The Diamondbacks travel to Colorado.  You might be familiar with the Rockies scoring habits but just to remind you, Matt Cain and Madison Bumgarner went to Colorado on Thursday and Friday night and the Rockies scored 6 and 10 runs, respectively, and where the teams have combined for 33 runs total in that span.  I point that out because no pitch or pitcher is safe in that thin air so Chavez giving you a HR or two and a few doubles wouldn’t surprise me.  He follows that up with heading back home to face the Padres, a team with the 6th worst away ERA in baseball right now.  And speaking of home, Chavez thrives in AZ where he has a 1.054 OPS as of Saturday morning thru 42 at-bats.  Though I can’t promise he’ll get to face the two scheduled lefties – he only has 10 AB against them so far this season – I’d have to think with how hot his bat is, he’ll get a shot at at least one of them.  So all this to say, the next time that old guy tries to buy you a drink, 4 lady Razzball readers, give him a shot.  He just might not be the Creeper he looks like but a Creeper you’d enjoy riding all of next week…wait, what?  Skycrest out!

From Around The Web

  1. Wake Up says:
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    first

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      Beleventieth

      • Wake Up says:
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        @Sky: Espinosa is really starting to piss me off…

        • Sky

          Sky says:
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          I’d like to pull him, BJ Upton and Ike into the same room and slowly fill it with cyanide jello. The first one who promises to hit above their weight, I let go. The rest, death.

      • Wake Up says:
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        @Sky: fifeth…the sweetest sounding of all the numbers…

        • Sky

          Sky says:
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          and Sexteen is probably the sweeting sounding number to Kip Winger.

  2. AC says:
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    There’s something wrong with ESPN’s last 7 days stats. He’s only hit one homerun in May, but has 2 homeruns in the last 7 days?

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      Ah I just saw that…weird. ESPN is clearly spending too much money keeping Skip Bayless employed and not giving enough to their researchers.

  3. mpc says:
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    Worried about Fernando Rodney? Trade him?

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      Not really worried. Depends what you’re trading him for

      • mpc says:
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        @Sky: I traded a slumping adam dunn 3 weeks ago to get Rondey, and he has pretty much shat the bed since. I’ve been offered players like Aybar and Kendrick. 14 team head to head mixed. Also roster Balfour, Bailey, Gregg…..

        • Sky

          Sky says:
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          I’d hold if that’s the market for him. Closers go thru bad stretches from time to time.

  4. Gareth says:
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    I have garcia. I’m going to drop him for either a saves helper, or a wins helper. I an equally behind the leader in both categories (5 behind).

    I have felix, gio, gallardo, cobb, lynn, aj burnett, homer bailey as starters.

    My relievers are street, frieri, betancourt, greg holland.

    Garcia would be dropped for either bobby parnell (saves) or julio teheran (2 starts).

    3 of the above have to sit on the bench all week in my league.

    So my 2 questions are:

    1) who would you pick up to replace garcia?

    2) which 3 pitchers sit?

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      What Garcia is this? Freddie? You could drop him for a bucket of piss, he’s not worth holding onto. Drop him for Parnell. If you want me to pick three people to sit, give me the matchups of your pitchers.

      • Gareth says:
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        @Sky: JAIME GARCIA. The guy who’s shoulder just fell off.

        Wow Sky. I didn’t know guys could get PMS!

        • Sky

          Sky says:
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          I have neither PMS nor ESP, so you kinda gotta help me know who you’re talking about or I’m left trying to get my spidey senses tingling. I’d still drop him for Parnell

      • Gareth says:
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        @Sky: I just picked up Teheran, dropping Garcia.

        Please Pick three of these guys to sit in my CBS Weekly ROTO:

        Homer Bailey (Cubs)
        Gallardo (LAD, PIT)
        GIo Gonzalez (@ San Fran)
        Felix (Tex)
        Lynn (@LAD)
        Cobb (@ Toronto)
        AJ Burnett (@ Brewers)
        Teheran (Twins, @ Mets)

        Betancourt (3 Arizona, 3 @ San Fran)
        Frieri (2 SEA, 4 @ Royals)
        Street (3 ST Loius, 3 @ Arizona)
        Greg Holland (4 Angels, 3 @ Houston)

        • Sky

          Sky says:
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          Bailey, Cobb and Teheran

  5. Gareth says:
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    I’m looking at Teherans numbers and am nervous about him (lots of hits, Low K’s).

    Those match ups though! The Twins @ Atlanta without the DH, then the Mets at that Cavernous ballpark in New York.

    Likely Scenario of Starting Teheran for this week 8 2 start?

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      Kinda already answered this with my first statement…

      • Gareth says:
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        @Sky: You need to grow a Moustache……………..

        • Sky

          Sky says:
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          I’ll take non-sequitur for $1000, Alex

  6. Flo G money says:
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    Thoughts on trade? I give up choo n mujica for mccutchen. Have 4 closers now so willing to part

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      I would

  7. Frank Lynch says:
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    Sup Brotha!!! I’m probly gonna make a pickup for my batting cause I don’t have anyone on the bench right now except for Reyes on DL.. What you think about LaRoche? If I do pick someone up then I have a pitcher to def drop cause I just picked him up for one day

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      Hey Frank, not sure how to answer this one. Are you asking me if you should drop Bell or Hammel for LaRoche? If so, I’d drop Hammel there.

      • Frank Lynch says:
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        Damn I just read what I wrote and it makes no sense at all!! Lol my bad… Should I pick up LaRoche for my bench? On another note, would you hold onto or get rid of Heath Bell or Hammel? Not for LaRoche, just for a waiver or something?

        • Sky

          Sky says:
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          Bell is pitching well and getting saves. Not sure why you’d want to drop him. Hammel is just ok, I’d drop him depending on whats in the FA pool. I’d pick up LaRoche depending on who you’re dropping him for.

  8. Frank Lynch says:
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    Oh I wanted to ask you, Do you think I should keep onto Heath Bell? Also how do you feel about Hammel at this time? Buy, Sell or drop???

  9. Gareth says:
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    Sean Connery had a Moustache.

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      So did Stalin

      • gareth says:
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        @Sky: that was an snl jeapoardy reference.

        • Sky

          Sky says:
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          I know, I almost went with Burt Reynolds but decided to zig.

  10. costaricanchata says:
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    as i mentioned to Dan Pants , Chavez has , indeed , performed rather well for me this past week .
    BUT … chavez in coors is not good , next week .

    lifetime .182 BA
    plus his match-ups are not favorable .
    ( vs garland , against whom he is 8 – 35 .
    and with chacin on the mound .. he is 0 – 0
    he might have a chance vs de la rosa .. 1 for 3 against him , but that was back in 2007 .)
    after that he gets a couple of tough match-ups vs padre hurlers , to end the week .

    the following week , however , holds some promise .
    a 4 game series in arlington that begins vs darvish in the front half of a double-header on monday , and ends with chavez probably sitting vs the tough left-hander , holland , on thursday .
    but , after that a 3 game series in wrigley .
    so , despite darvish and holland … he can probably rank up some nice stats in those two “hitters” parks .

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      I think we have to look at what those 8 hits were on Garland before we write off the matchup: 2 were for for HRs. Plus the last time Chavez has actually gone against Garland was 2008. Third, between 2007 and 2008, Chavez didn’t even play 160 games total and was hitting terribly due to injury period. He went 0/11 with a walk against Garland during that stretch. In other words, a relatively healthy Chavez vs a mediocre pitcher in Colorado is gonna be fine.

      22 AB in Colorado for is career. I’ll take the chance that .182 isn’t all that indicative of how he hits in Coors.

      Not sure what ‘tough matchups against Padre hurlers’ means. They have not pitched well at all this year, especially on the road.

      • costaricanchata says:
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        @Sky:

        i’m just suggesting that week 9 holds more promise for him than week 8 .

        let me throw this idea at you ==> you being your creeper of the week articles
        by scoring yourself on the previous week’s play .

        • Sky

          Sky says:
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          I hear ya, but you’re also suggesting to go into the teeth of Yu Darvish and a generally solid Texas staff vs some matchups that arent as daunting and saying there is more promise there. Just not seeing how I can get behind that. Not saying you’re wrong, just not seeing that working out as well, opportunity wise.

          I’ll take that consideration into thought, thanks!

          • costaricanchata says:
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            @Sky:

            oh , i hear what you’re saying , for sure .
            but as a chavez owner , i’m keeping my mile-high coors expectations
            in check … or ,at least , i’m trying to .

            i’ll take week 9 over your week 8 for the princely sum of one euro dollar .
            is it a bet ?
            (you should be aware that i have a cracker-jack of a lawyer on retainer ,
            and have yet had to pay up on a losing bet . it’s almost like be able to say ‘i never lose !!”) <== steve (nz) will attest to this . he prolly thinks i still owe him 3 or 4 euros .

          • costaricanchata says:
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            @Sky:

            btw … yu has been suffering from gopher-ball-itis .
            maybe chavez will win the lottery against him .

      • costaricanchata says:
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        @costaricanchata:

        dang .
        so many writing/spelling mistakes in this thread .
        i’ll just say “me no speaky good engrish” .. and be done with it .

        • Sky

          Sky says:
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          How about you owe me a Euro and I owe you spellcheck? Haha, sounds good. True about Darvish and I’m sure summer will take effect there as well. Of course, Chavez will go on the DL on Monday and make this all moot just to spite both of us.

          • costaricanchata says:
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            @Sky:

            (hands covering ears) nah nah nah nah nah nah nah

            • Sky

              Sky says:
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              Are you getting jiggy with it?

  11. gareth says:
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    Is ricky weeks droppable? Not much on the wire to replace him daniel murphy. neil walker. Yeuch.

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      I’d prefer not to drop him if those are the options.

  12. gareth says:
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    Arenado or lawrie ros?

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      Arenado

  13. gareth says:
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    That locke guy in pittsburgh huh. Doing pretty good.

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      Smoke and mirrors, I’m not buying. Gotta put this start in perspective: it was the Astros.

  14. gareth says:
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    The indians must be a play off contender now, right? The tigers will probably take the division but a wild slot is not out of the question.

    Kevin costner was at the game today. enough said.

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      Big thing with them is whether the pitching stays this solid. Offense was gonna be there given the guys they have, it was a question of what they were gonna get out of that rotation. Liked McCallister coming into the season as a low end SP5 or 6 type and he’s playing above that right now. Overall, if Ubaldo/Kazmir/Masterson keep these recent gains, they’re an interesting team and definitely in the wild card hunt.

  15. Jack Full of Hate says:
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    whats up my brotha from anotha….state

    my 12th place team where I am letting the writers run it is just getting worse. BJ, Espinosa, Sal Perez, Ethier, Markakis, Howard, Melky, Saunders, Dee Gordon, oh, and Giancarlo on the DL

    Who can I dump at this point to chase hot schomatos?

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      State of what is the question? State of confusion? Elation? Love & Trust?

      Melky Ethier and Markakis are all cut from the same jello mould of being underwhelming. I’d start there, probably with Ethier and then Markakis.

      • Jack Full of Hate says:
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        @Sky: so hold Saunders and Dee Gordon

        State of elation

        • Sky

          Sky says:
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          Good to hear!

          Saunders really is a 20/20 guy but he’s gonna have average issues. I’d rather take that than .260 with 20/0 from Ethier, personally. I’m only suggesting to hold Dee because he’s a better commodity for trade than those other guys unless you know of someone in your league that’s interested in them. Hopefully he gets hot and you can move on from him via trade. He looks terrible at the plate, though his bunts have been good; he’s just missing getting an infield hit per game by a nanosecond.

          • Jack Full of Hate says:
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            @Sky: I dumped Gordon, might drop Espi too, figure, ihav enothing to lose and maybe someone will drop something useful

            • Sky

              Sky says:
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              I wish you luck there, I just picked up McClouth in one of my leagues. I’m turning the OF5 spot into a revolving door on my team.

          • Jack Full of Hate says:
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            @Sky: do you think Lowrie bounces back, he is available

            • Sky

              Sky says:
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              He was bound to regress. He’s still hitting the ball well – LD% in April was 28% while May is 26.9% so far – but his BABIP by month (.388 vs .250) is what’s dragging him down. Too lucky in April and not lucky at all in May. I believe he’ll bounce back just fine once the BABIP normalizes. I still like him as a .260 hitter overall, but more likely not gonna get those 24 HRs I thought he’d get unless he goes on a tear in the summer months (which he could do). All and all, I like him more than Dee Gordon if that’s the comparison point.

              • Jack Full of Hate says:
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                @Sky: what about Florimon, he’s had a nice 2 weeks

                • Sky

                  Sky says:
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                  Hitting 9th in a poor lineup…I don’t trust the run

                  • Jack Full of Hate says:
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                    @Sky: damn, and your sensible answers

                    I have been slacking on my football terms homework, I need an extension professor Sky

                    • Sky

                      Sky says:
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                      I hate my own logicalness sometimes…

                      Youll need to do some after school studying. Corporal punishment may or may not happen.

                  • Jack Full of Hate says:
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                    @Sky: after school? corporal punishment?….sounds kinky….Yes Sir.

  16. joa900 says:
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    What do you guys think about daniel murphy for lincecum?

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      I’d take Murphy but pretty meh about both

      • joa900 says:
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        @Sky: Thanks for the response man.

        • Sky

          Sky says:
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          No prob!

  17. The Red Cyclones says:
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    Drop Crisp or Span for Fowler in a 10-team h2h league?

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      Span

      • The Red Cyclones says:
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        @Sky: Thanks! Someone got really antsy and dropped him after his little hip injury earlier on the week, this will hopefully set me in what’s been a really frustrating position this season.

        • Sky

          Sky says:
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          No prob; truthfully I like a lot of those arms to varying degrees but in. Keeper league, Wheeler still holds a lot of value/interest.

  18. JJ says:
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    Pick 2 pitchers out of this group for the ROS.
    J.BECKETT
    U.JIMENEZ
    B.MCCARTHY
    A.PETTITTE
    K.KENDRICK
    F.LIRIANO
    Z.WHEELER
    It is a 12 team H2H 5X5 keeper league. But we only keep 10.

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      Kendrick/Wheeler due to keeper

  19. Mariner Mike says:
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    Profar’s finally coming. What do think? I’m going after him and hoping he has a great two weeks and Texas will think a little.

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      Yeah, I’m grabbing him everywhere I can. Its all about upside at 2B this year because there ain’t much else

      • Mariner Mike says:
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        @Sky: Thanks Sky

        • Sky

          Sky says:
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          No prob

  20. Jack Full of Hate says:
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    Lawrie or Mous ROS?

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      @Jack Full of Hate: How did I miss this? I personally still like Mous. Lawrie I no longer trust. Truth: traded him in my keeper for Encarnacion over the off-season to an antsy Edwin owner. I knew the average with E5 was a mirage but the power would stay. Yup, it’s panning out how I expected.

  21. Frank White says:
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    Sup Sky… For Hammel would you grab any of these guys? if so then who’s a better pickup? Brandon Belt, Kelly Johnson or LaRoche

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      LaRoche

      • Frank White says:
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        I agree and I’m not disagreeing but whats the down side to Johnson?

        • Frank White says:
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          Also, Why is everyone telling me to drop Donaldson? He gets me 30 points a week and he’s bating 317, 6HR and 27RBI’s.. Now, What’s the problem???

          • Sky

            Sky says:
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            Context. I’m sure they’re not telling you to drop him outright. His BABIP is .349 which is very high and most likely unsustainable since he’s not a speedster type.

        • Sky

          Sky says:
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          Not really sure how to answer that question. You gave me three guys and asked who was the best pickup. LaRoche is best player of the three, not really sure how to answer a question about downside when that’s the subject.

          • Frank White says:
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            My bad dude!!! I type with 2 thoughts inmy head sometimes and I send it before I read it. sorry..

            • Sky

              Sky says:
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              Not a problem; Kelly Johnson’s career line kinda says it all. He’s had a really up and down career. LaRoche usually starts the year off poorly but manages to hit 25 HRs and bat over .260 for the season which – when considering how poorly he starts – means he’s pretty damn good from late May on.

  22. Fried Fish Fan says:
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    Besides z. wheeler and g. cole which minor league SPs do you see making a fantasy impact this season?

      • Fried Fish Fan says:
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        @Sky: thanks Sky!

          • Fried Fish Fan says:
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            @Sky: this is by far the best fantasy baseball site going, I only discovered it this year and greedily am not telling anyone in my league about it…sorry

            • Sky

              Sky says:
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              Ha thanks and no worries! I did the same when I started reading the site myself. We’re the cool kids that no one knows about!

  23. Frank White says:
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    So i’m gonna drop Hammel for LaRoche right. Should I do it before Hammel see’s the Yankees on Wed or after??

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      Yeah, you don’t want any part of that; go LaRoche.

  24. Frank White says:
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    Yo I streamed 2 pitchers this weekend, Feldman and Vargas, and they both got me 30 points each!! If streaming means picking up then dropping after another from day to day.. Now that I know about the stream o nator it’s awesome. I always pay attention to the guys you talk good about then check if they’re available in my league and sometimes they’ll be keepers like Shelby Miller, Mujica, Corbin etc… or if I need points now to win the week i’ll look them up on the meter or just look for great %’s and grab the best one. Thanks guy’s. The more I look into this site the more I find that’s soooo helpful. Now when I look at the meter I pretty much look at the QS being high, the W & L category and one of your guys said it’s good to look at the $ being high.. Am I doing it the right way?

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      Hey Frank, I have zero to do with the stream-o-nator but it sounds like you’re doing it right. If you have further quetsions on it, I’d hit up Rudy.

  25. Frank White says:
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    Hey buddy, Grey was saying to sell Shelby Miller. Do you agree?

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      Yup

  26. Frank White says:
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    I have a guy interested. Do you think Alex Rios for him is good or do u think I can get better?

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      I think you can do better. Both are sell high candidates in my book.

      • Frank White says:
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        Do you think Hamilton will finally break out of that slump? Maybe Miller n Donaldson or Crawford for Hamilton and Harvey or cueto?

  27. Frank White says:
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    He also has Encarnacion

    • Frank White says:
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      my bad… And he has Rizzo, Melky n Zobrist

      • Sky

        Sky says:
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        Gotta hone it down here for me. Listing 20 guys, I’m not gonna be of much help to you. What does your team need? Power? A first basemen? Not a fan of Hamilton. Like Rizzo/Edwin

        • Frank White says:
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          I really don’t know what I need. Maybe you can tell me… Actually I’ve been doing just fine posting the highest points in the league. It’s just I hope the pitching isn’t allot of luck that wearing down, like Miller..
          Wieters
          Fielder
          Altuve
          Starlin castro
          zzimmerman
          MCcutchen
          holliday
          Justin Upton
          Carl Crawford
          Donaldson
          LaRoche

          • Sky

            Sky says:
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            Try and get Rizzo or Edwin. Prefer Edwin but you might have a hard time getting him. Try and package Donaldson/Miller for him. Depends on the other team’s needs as well, of course. I’d take Rizzo in a deal like that too but I’d want a two for two deal at that point.

  28. Frank White says:
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    Real quick. I picked up Odorizzi, Is he really worth the pickup cause grey said sit him next and he’s only there for 2 more games then Price will be back? keep or drop?

    • Sky

      Sky says:
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      In a ten team? not worth keeping around, doubt he sticks in the rotation. He’s a stream play right now.

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