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Out of the fire and into the Frieri pan, or as the Sciosciapath would say, buffet Thursdays.  Ernesto Frieri has imploded you ratios the past 10 days and has been put into a closer-by-committee type situation. This is ungood for fantasy purposes twofold; first no one wants to roster the remaining parts of the Angels bullpen, namely Dane de la Rosa or the like.  Second, after he has taken a steaming pile of feces on your team, do you really want Frieri to remain.  Well Daniel Bryan is currently a yes man so think of him on opposite day.  The Angels best option to take the job is currently back in the rotation; Garrett Richards was doing swell in the pen until the Angels were sucking fumes in the first 6 innings of games and needed some youthful infusion.  So now we are stuck in a CBC holding pattern until Frieri figures his hiccups out or some one like “Chaka” Kohn or the loosely translated “damage of the rose” emerges.  Stay tuned or don’t, I have plenty of Dipsy Doodles to occupy my time.

Rafael Soriano – You know you’re having a rough stretch when Vin Mazzaro and a guy who is probably third in-line for saves on his team, Darren O’Day, have the same amount of saves as you in the past 2 week.  That total of one is an uninspiring total for teams rostering him as a RP1 type save guy.  To combat his poor total is an awful ERA, over 5 for July, and a dip in K’s and a rise in walks.  Yikes.  I am not saying abandon ship but the violins are tuning up, and the Nats are folding up some tents.  Tyler Clippard is on ready 5.

Jim Henderson - Set-up, closer, setup, closer.  That’s the pattern for him this year.  Since the trade of K-Rod he has converted 4 straight save chances and notched 12k’s in 7IP in the last 2 weeks.  Just call him Fozzy the closer.  Since  I wrote about John Axford last week he basically sucked; I wish I could put it better but when I write about someone they shat all over the place. Henderson looks comfy in the closer chair there for now.

Astros Closer – It’s going to be a mismatched sock day when it comes to saves in Houston.  Jose Cisnero seems like the most likely candidate to replace Jose Veras.  The call ups of Josh Zeid and Chia-Jen Lo add to the confusion of an already awful situation.  Don’t expect much in the way of saves or consistency until someone jumps up like that toy in a jack-in-the-box to scare you into fantasy rosterdom.

 

$12 Salads

You know that restaurant your girlfriend/wife/what-have-you likes to go to that charges, like, $12 for a salad? Every time you go there, you have a thoroughly solid meal. No complaints, except you just paid $12 for a salad when you could’ve went to McDonald’s and stuffed you and your woman for ten schmools and had $2 in quarters left over to make the hotel bed vibrate. These closers are $12 salads.

1. Craig Kimbrel – (-) ( Jordan Walden, Scott Downs, Luis Avilan)

2. Mariano Rivera – (-) (David Robertson, Shawn Kelley, Boone Logan)

3. Joe Nathan – (-) (Joakim Soria, Tanner Scheppers, Neal Cotts)

4. Kenley Jansen – (+8)  (Paco Rodriguez, Chris Withrow, Ronald Belisario)

5. Greg Holland – (+5) (Aaron crow, Tim Collins, Kelvin Herrera)

6. Aroldis Chapman – (-1) (J.J. Hoover, Manny Parra, Sam LeCure)

7. Glen Perkins – (-) (Casey Fien, Jared Burton, Brian Duensing)

8. Grant Balfour – (+1) (Ryan Cook, Sean Doolittle)

9. Rafael Soriano – (-5) (Tyler Clippard, Ian Krol)

10. Jim Johnson – (-2) (Francisco Rodriguez, Darren O’Day, Brian Matusz)

11. Addison Reed - (-) (Matt Lindstrom,Nate Jones)

12. Jonathan Papelbon – (+1) (Antonio Bastardo, Justin DeFrautus)

13. Sergio Romo – (+1) (Santiago Casilla, Jose Mijares, Sandy Rosario)

DonkeyCorns

Imagine you’re following a donkey, who’s wearing a wool cap, through a desert for 1700 miles. Why are you following a donkey? Because he promises you something wonderful and you just need to trust him. Does the donkey talk? Yes. Yes, he does talk. So when you and the donkey in the wool cap arrive at his destination, he removes the wool cap to reveal a horn. The donkey is a unicorn and his gift to you for your trust is saves. These closers are Donkeycorns.

14. Edward Mujica – (+1) (Trevor Rosenthal, Seth Maness, Kevin Seigrist)

15. Fernando Rodney – (+2) (Joel Peralta, Jake McGee)

16. Koji Uehara – (+3) (Junichi Tazawa, Matt Thornton, Craig Breslow)

17. Casey Janssen – (+1) (Steve Delabar, Brett Cecil)

18. Bobby Parnell – (+2) (LaTroy Hawins, David Aardsma, Scott Rice)

19. Huston Street – (+4) (Luke Gregerson, Dale Thayer)

20. Chris Perez – (+3) (Cody Allen, Joe Smith)

21. Joaquin Benoit – (-) (Jose Veras, Drew Smyly)

22. Tom Wilhelmsen – (+8) (Oliver Perez, Yoervis Medina)

23.  Mark Melancon – (-17) (Justin Wilson, Tony Watson, Bryan Morris)

24. Steve Cishek – (+2) (A.J. Ramos, Mike Dunn)

25. Jim Henderson – (+3) (John Axford, Brandon Kinzler)

Brain Freezes

I’m going on a picnic and I’m bringing apples, bananas and Carlos Marmol– Wait, he just gave up 12 earned runs and hit Castro in the head with a pick-off throw. Brain freeze! Make it stop! Use the following closers at your own risk.

26. Brad Ziegler – (+3) (Heath Bell, J.J. Putz, David Hernandez)

27. Rex Brothers – (-6) (Matt Belisle, Wilton Lopez)

28. Kevin Gregg – (-3) (Jeff Russell, Pedro Strop, Blake Parker)

29. Ernesto Frieri – (-13) (Dane de la Rosa, Kevin Jepsen, Tony Danza)

30. Jose Cisnero – (-3) (Travis Blackley, Chia-Jen Lo, Wesley Wright)

From Around The Web

  1. Mitch says:
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    most likely to be named closer: JJ Putz or Strop?

    • Smokey

      Smokey says:
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      @Mitch: Putz for now until Gregg gets to the waiver deadline trade

      • goodfold2 says:
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        @Smokey: when is the waiver deadline trade? melancon -17. I’m pretty sure his 8th inning work this year was at least as good as grilli’s last year.

        • Smokey

          Smokey says:
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          @goodfold2: aug 31, Need to see Melancon in closer role for awhile to get him up the rankings some

  2. Papajeansegura says:
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    Lol nice I have two 12 dollar salads and 3 donkeycorns pretty good mix

    • Smokey

      Smokey says:
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      @Papajeansegura: sounds like you have a farm

  3. TheGoods says:
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    Drew Smyly ever going to start? Something tells me he’s happy to do anything

    • Cheese says:
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      @TheGoods: I lol’d

      • goodfold2 says:
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        @Cheese: is he happy to do anything because his name? can’t imagine a guy with that name not being pushed around and taking it? If marlboro man is to be believed, no. He siad something to the effect of “he can stretch out on his couch in the offseason” or something like that.

  4. Jack Full of Hate says:
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    I’m still stashing handcuffs, please rank in terms of likelihood of them getting a job/chance

    Bastardo, Strop, Parker, Farquhar, de la Rosa?

  5. Mike says:
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    I have wilhelmsen, reed, janssen. Veras on the bench. Should I

    1-try and make a trade for romo or Johnson (guy is willing to deal)
    2-pick up Ziegler, Gregg,
    3-hold

    I’m concerned about era + whip. Can’t fall behind any further in that area

    Thanks!

    • Smokey

      Smokey says:
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      @Mike: if Romo is Avail go get him if price is nice

  6. Clint says:
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    2 $12 salads, 2 donkeycorns, and 2 brain freezes later and I’m sitting in 9th out of 12 in my league for saves and comfortably atop the league overall. Too bad Gregg and/or Betancourt didn’t get traded or I could have this league in the bag by mid August for my first championship.

  7. stonepie says:
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    got romo, gregg and brothers

    considering punting saves all together and trading them..

    • Smokey

      Smokey says:
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      @stonepie: Romo could net you something nice

  8. oldman says:
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    the donkeycorn explanation is probably my favorite thing on this site. other than the machine, of course.

  9. Tehol Beddict says:
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    So strop is not behind Gregg????? I thought that was certified

    • Smokey

      Smokey says:
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      @Tehol Beddict: I think that had a lot to do with the assurance that Russell was getting traded

  10. Hallsy says:
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    Pence and Samardzja for Masterson and Travis Wood ROS? I get Pence side. Need an OF bat and could use a solid SP

    • Smokey

      Smokey says:
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      @Hallsy: You will lose some K’s with 2 SP going the other way, nothing you cant make up with streaming

  11. SteveNZ says:
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    Hey Smokey –

    I have David Hernandez in a Holds league and also in an RCL for ratio help. Any point in holding him? He seems to have slipped down the pecking order and has been terrible the last few times out.

    • Smokey

      Smokey says:
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      @SteveNZ: I dont see a reason to if there are option garnering decent holds available

  12. AB says:
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    Would you drop Frieri for Uehara?

    • Smokey

      Smokey says:
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      @AB: Uehara is def the far better option yes yes yes

  13. Scott Evans

    Scott Evans says:
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    A commenter on one of my posts referred to Cody Asche as “Cody Ashy Larry”. Thought you should know.

    • Smokey

      Smokey says:
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      @Scott Evans: Nice. Good nickname.

  14. JDW says:
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    Darvish with TEN Ks through 3.2 innings!!!

  15. SteveNZ says:
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    Best SP-eligible Holds guy?

    Outman
    Hochevar (tho doesn’t get many chances)
    Mazzaro
    Duensing (blech)
    Blackley (own him currently – blech)
    Stauffer
    Cecil

    • Smokey

      Smokey says:
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      @SteveNZ: Blackley, Mazzaro, Cecil

  16. Brooke says:
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    Hey Smokey! Congrats on waking up from your coma and ranking Kenley properly! I wish you a speedy recovery :)

    • Smokey

      Smokey says:
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      @Brooke: I am glad that you are happy..my life is finally complete.

  17. and1mcgee says:
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    Just picked up Tony Danza, Tupac’s penpal, thanks!

  18. Abdoozy says:
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    Don’t get Melancorn’s ranking, the -17 part? Does that mean that’s how far Pitt’s closer situation fell when Grilli got his owie?

    • Smokey

      Smokey says:
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      @Abdoozy: yea this is the first post-injury ranking for the pirates closer

  19. Eliezer Vergara says:
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    Awesome piece! Got a FB trade
    Deadline offer i need some advice on :
    Got offered Brothers for either Wheeler or Cole. Who would you rather trade in a non keeper league* I’ve already got Gregg, Wilhelmson and Parnell in a 4 RP league – could use one more to fill that slot.

  20. Drew says:
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    Hey Smokey- who is the KC pitcher to own for holds?

    • Smokey

      Smokey says:
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      @Drew: Herrera or Crow

  21. Titan says:
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    RP’s 6×6(holds) weekly

    Rest of year best (top 4?) for combo of: Holds/ERA/WHIP/K-9

    McGee, Bastardo, O’Day, R.Cook, Strop, Gregerson, Scheppers, Crow, Burton, Watson, Doolittle, Herrera, Cody Allen

    • Smokey

      Smokey says:
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      @Titan: McGee, O’Day, Herrera, Bastardo, Gregerson

  22. Nate says:
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    Wilhelmsen owner wondering if i hold or drop for Perez?

    • Smokey

      Smokey says:
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      @Nate: last night was on the manager I think, bringing him into a 5 run game is just poor confidence building, but it will be interesting to see what happens

      • goodfold2 says:
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        @Smokey: confidence or not it’s plain stupid to bring in ace RP in non-leverage inning. 5 run leads count as that. Many closers don’t perform well in spots like that. Wilhelm (except one time) hasn’t looked bad lately in actual save situation in long time. Perez and Medina looked pretty much as bad. All three got hit. Medina couldn’t throw strikes either. The next save opp is what will start to put real doubt into manager’s head, if wilhelm f’s up. what was the manager supposed to due if Kaiser got a save on FRI, then he was needed again on SAT or SUN, put him out again tired, now that it matters? STL put Mujica out there with 13 run lead yesterday. Same stupid shit. I understood when near everybody did this last day before all star break, because there was a BREAK.

        • Aubrey Plaza's Pillow says:
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          @goodfold2: new update, Mr.Manager (twit) over at SEA town demoted Wilhelm for the short term again. grab medina or possibly furbush?

          • Grey

            Grey says:
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            Read the post

  23. Jeff says:
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    I hate Jonathan Papelbon. It seems all he’s good at doing recently is blowing saves. That’s a negative in my league (yours too). Should I keep the faith?

    • Smokey

      Smokey says:
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      @Jeff: Faith not really his desire to pitch in Philly and his effectiveness in getting batters out just plan sucks right now.

Comments are closed.