Fantasy Baseball Advice

Before we get to Khalil and Renteria, we’ll cover the deal between the South Siders and the Turner Southerners.  I already went over the trade and how it affect Javier Vazquez for 2009. That shizz is old.  Almost three days ago. Where you been? Topeka? Wait a second, what the hell am I talking about?  Oh, yeah, the Javier Vazquez trade for the other schmohawks. Wow, for a second I felt like Larry King talking gibberish.  Did you ever wonder if Larry King remembers what he said right after he just said something? I do. All the time. Anyway, here’s the other schmohawks that the White Sox received in the trade for Javier Vazquez and some other fantasy baseball implications:

Brent Lillibridge – Doesn’t his name sound like a Native American name for a person of small stature? Papa, I want to go on the Superman Tower of Power Rollercoaster! I’m sorry, Brent Lillibridge. You don’t reach Daffy Duck’s hand. Okay, so you’re showing Lillibridge and the dealer pulls Marcus Giles post-steroids. That’s a push.

Tyler Flowers – Flowers needs time to bloom — oofa! He’s a decent prospect, but he could still end up the way of, “What’s that guy’s name again?”  It’s still too early for him for fantasy, except in some deep 2009 keeper leagues.

Now back in for the two other schmohawks that changed hands, Khalil Greene and Renteria or as I like to call them — Ugly and Yawnstipating. Silent H went over to the Cards and Renteria to the Giants. So how does this affect their fantasy value and guys around them for 2009? Well, let’s see:

Khalil Greene – The Cards found their new nine hole hitter. Nah, I’m only half joking. LaRussa will prolly bat Khalil sixth and watch him hit 25/75/.240. Khalil is not going to suddenly take walks and have an OBP of .400. He’s in for a small boost in value leaving Petco, but doode could hit .235 in Coors. He’ll end up on some mixed league team towards the end of a draft, you should hope it’s not yours.

Edgar Renteria – Obviously the AL Central was too small for Renteria and Orlando Cabrera. You will die like the rebels in the parrot jungle! Renteria moves to the Giants where he will further disappear from fantasy radars.  In NL-Only leagues, Renteria is a good endgame target. Just don’t expect too much. He might quietly put up another .300 season and a handful of steals.

Luis Rodriguez/Sean Kazmar – Potential 2009 Padres Shortstops for $200, Alex. The answer is Luis Rodriguez and Sean Kazmar. Guys Who You Don’t Want On Your Fantasy Team in 2009?

Jack Wilson – Supposedly the Tigers are looking to grab him for ER’s cancellation. I have one rhetorical question for them — and you thought Renteria was bad?

Emmanuel Burriss/Kevin Frandsen/Eugenio Velez – Two are SAGNOFers (Velez and Burriss) and one is useless. With Renteria now in the Bay Area, these three schmohawks will battle for 2nd. (The thought of them battling made me think of a 3 on 1 wrestling match like Andre the Giant used to have, but in this case Andre’s played by Pablo Sandoval. And that made me giggle. Hehe.) If one of the SAGNOFers grabs the spot, I will be excited and pushing you to grab him for cheap speed.

During my 2nd 2009 fantasy baseball draft — mock! — I said something like, “I’m going to end up with Javier Vazquez on a bunch of teams in 2009.”  And that’s me paraphrasing me! Well, lookie-lookie. Someone in the Braves brass (prolly Cox) reads Razzball and liked the idea of having Vazquez on their team in 2009 because they just acquired him from the White Sox for three top prospects. (Or maybe three top prospects and a fourth not-so-top prospect. I’m not sure as I write this; the deal’s not finalized. I’ll cover the other guys in a future post, but right now this is the news and I’m Boogaloo Shrimp up in here breakin’ it.) So what’s so exciting about Javier Vazquez in 2009 for fantasy baseball?

Now stay with me here, because these numbers are about to become Fast & Furious: Tokyo Drift-style.  200 Ks in 208 1/3 IP in 2008.  In 2007, 213 Ks in 216 2/3 IP. In 2006, 184 Ks. 2005 — 192 Ks. As Moses said in the desert, are you following me here? Dooode strikes out people and throws a ton of innings. Now he moves to the NL (though a decent hitting NL division) and gets to pitch in a park that slightly favored hitters in 2008, but is a pretty neutral park overall, unlike Cellular Field that simply favors hitters. Me likey. Before the trade, Bill James projected a 3.80/1.24/195 in 214 innings for 2009. I think those were generous projections before the trade, but now I think they’re right in line with what you should expect. (Did Bill James get a hold of Biff Tannen’s sports book? Food for thought.) The only thing that kinda dulls the finish on this trade is, “The Mazzone Shine.”

For seventeen years Mazzone did such wonders with the Braves pitchers that people still overrate them, even though Mazzone hasn’t been there in years. This want to applaud the Bravos pitchers is “The Mazzone Shine.” (Tell me Jo-Jo Reyes or Jorge Campillo would have been as owned in 2008 if not for The Mazzone Shine. FYI, that’s a rhetorical “Tell me.” I’m not really asking you.) Unfortunately, The Mazzone Shine will now help people locate Javier Vazquez on their 2009 fantasy radars.  Prior to the trade, Vazquez was a sleeper with upside, as evidenced by my 15th and 17th round mock draft picks. Now The Shine may lift him from underrated to rated.

In an offseason of questionable moves for the Royals, they just one-downed themselves.  Or is it one-upped? Coco Crisp was traded to the Royals for Ramon Ramirez. This trade says more about the state of baseball than much else. The Sox send a fourth OF/bench player to the Royals where he’ll be a starter and major key to their offense. Surplus is nice when you have it, ain’t it, Epstein? If the trade were going the other way, I can only assume a middle man for the Sawx is about a number two starter on the Royals. Anyway, here’s some 2009 fantasy baseball implications for this trade:

Coco Crisp – Coco Crisp will be a starter again. For the Ministry of Silly Names, this is a great day. For everyone else, this means a very cheap potential 15/20/.280 hitter has just entered the league.  Also, with the peasant Royals, Crisp will prolly be the leadoff man, but don’t think that means much in the way of runs. David DeJesus was their primary leadoff man in 2008 and he only scored 70 runs.

Mark Teahen – This trade pushes Teahen to the bench.  Not a big loss for fantasy.

Ramon Ramirez – Has solid stuff for a middle reliever and I would consider grabbing him late in deep AL-Only leagues if you’re a Mr. B. Don’t go crazy though, he’s not really a mixed league candidate just yet.

Justin Masterson – Boom goes the dynamite!  Or is it boom goes his fantasy value? With the addition of Ramirez, Masterson could be heading into the rotation or the Sawx might use him for trade bait while his value is high. Everything I’ve read on Masterson says he’s a solid middle reliever who could be exploited in the rotation. Personally, I think a Sawx starter has value in the right matchups, even if he’s Danny Masterson little brother.

The Marlins firesale continued as they traded Kevin Gregg to the Chicago Cubs for Jose Ceda. Gregg was arbitration-eligible so rather than pay anything more to their highest paid player at $2.5 million, the Marlins traded him for a guy who will be happy to be paid with a season pass to Six Flags. I love The Batman Ride!™ I wonder if the Marlins use a stolen credit card to pay their players. Did they use a calling card and a stolen cellphone to call the Cubs? Did the Marlins make this trade because Ceda promised to help with concession sales? The 2009 Marlins salary is looking like it’ll be about the same price it is to greenlight a low-budget slasher film. I’m sure the fans for both will have similar reactions. Put your hands in front of your eyes, and scream. This will mean there’s a change afoot for the 2009 closers in both Wrigleyville and Miami-ville. Let’s look at the 2009 fantasy baseball implications for this trade:

Kevin Gregg – Piniella, “I know we have Marmol, but I need someone to screw up the 9th inning!” The Cubs GM says they’re keeping their options open about who will be the closer in 2009. I have a sneaking suspicion it’s going to be a case where Piniella says something like, “Gregg has closed before and Marmol is good in the 7th and 8th innings, why should we change anything?”  This doesn’t mean Marmol won’t be the 2009 closer. It just means I wouldn’t be surprised if the Cubs lean towards Gregg being the 2009 closer. Closing really has little to do with being the better pitcher; it’s all about opportunity.

Kerry Wood – Wood’s definitely on the way out now. I’m sure this will bring up mixed emotions for any levelheaded Cubs fans (<–oxymoron).  It will be interesting to see where he lands. Conjecture called and said, “Maybe San Diego.”

Carlos Marmol – See Gregg, Kevin or about an inch above. In addition, I will say Marmol should be the closer. Hopefully the right thing happens here and Piniella goes with Marmol.

Jose Ceda – Actually has really good stuff as he averaged more than a K an inning in Double-A. Double-A?! Did I stutter? Yes, he’s still very raw at 21. Does it surprise you at all that the Marlins would acquire a very cheap, raw minor leaguer?

Matt Lindstrom – Matt Lindstrom will prolly (BTW, if you weren’t aware, I have fully embraced “Prolly” as a shortened form of “Probably.” “Seriously” may soon become “Srsly.” Stay tuned!) receive the biggest value bump from this trade. Lindstrom was set to be the Marlins 2009 closer when they gave him the job at the end of September and now it looks to be official. This is not to say he’ll succeed, but as always SAGNOF. If Lindstrom’s the closer, which it looks like he will be, then he’s the one that needs to be drafted in 2009.

I went over the fantasy baseball implications of the Holliday trade for Holliday the other day. Now that the deal has been finalized, approximately three days later, I’ll go other the other parts of the trade. This part of the trade is also known as, “The Players That the Rockies Received from Beane as He Played the MLB Version of Let’s Make A Deal.” Dan O’Dowd, “I’ll take Door Number 3!” Announcer, “It’s…. Huston Street!” The Rockies fans groan. Anyway, here’s the other schmohawks that the Rockies received in the trade for Matt Holliday and some other fantasy baseball implications:

Huston Street – 2009 Vegas line for Huston Street is an Over/Under of 15 saves and a 60-Day DL trip. You need to know more? Okay, side note. At some point during the 2008 season, I mentioned that I owned Kerry Wood on a team. People commented that they were surprised since in the preseason of 2008 I was down on Wood. I said I owned Wood because everyone was down on Wood. He ended up being a late-round bargain. They’re zigging, man! Then zag. If the Rockies are saying Street is the closer and if he falls far enough to me, then I’m drafting him.  As always, SAGNOF.  I just know I’m going to end up with Street on a team or two or three. No one thinks he’s going to make it the whole season or get many saves. Whatevs, he might not. I’m still drafting him real late and taking his 15 saves. What, you don’t have a DL slot?

Joey Devine – I’ve already shown you my campaign pin for Devine in 2009. Unfortunately, the louder I sing his praises, the more Devine is going to be hyped up going into 2009 drafts. Make no mistake, this will not make him better, just more hyped. Make sure to keep those two separate in your mind.

Brad Ziegler – No one has come out and said Devine will be the A’s closer in 2009. I just think he will. Ziegler has “Setup man” written all over him. It was written on him by Devine while Ziegler was passed out drunk.

Carlos Gonzalez – Last year, Gonzalez did not show one sign that he was ready for the majors. He’s a decent prospect that needs to be grabbed in keeper and NL-Only leagues as an endgame option. He may not do a thing in 2009. His role will have to be watched in spring training.

Greg Smith – He was the recipient of terrible run support on the A’s (Shocker!), but now that the Rockies gave away their offensive centerpiece, they may look like the 2008 A’s in 2009. Greg Smith is a flyball pitcher heading to Coors — Hey, Gus, leave the balls in the humidor for another twenty minutes. I don’t think they’re done yet. — and Smith doesn’t strikeout many hitters. I want Ubaldo and Francis before Smith on my fantasy teams in 2009 and I don’t really want them either. Understand? Or am I being obtuse?