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Someone defrost Ted Williams’ head, Jed Lowrie is hitting .516.  If Mickey Rooney were playing the part of Dice-K, he’d say Jed is so Lovrie.  That’s if we can pull Rooney away from pooping in your neighbor’s chimney.  Right now, Lowrie is seasoning up fantasy steaks something delicious, but can this continue?  Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Josh Hamilton left the game with a fracture to his humerus bone, which isn’t connected to the funny bone.  He was going down the line head first into home and… Well, he’s Mr. Glass, so what do you expect?  Ron Washington can’t believe anyone could ever get hurt going down a line head first.  Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Some rejected titles for this post were, “Adam’s Appendix Is Dunn,” “Dunn’s Appendix Chooses Worst Of Three Outcomes,” and “Dunn Develops Killer App.”  First Holliday, now Adam Dunn with a busted appendix.  I heard if the doctor gets cold during the surgery, he’s going to snuggle inside Dunn like Luke did with his tauntaun.  Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?