Jose Tabata, the Latin 21, one-time lauded Yankee prospect, was initially heralded as a power corner-OF but wrist issues have seem to have inspired Tabata to become the next Nyjer Morgan. He’ll likely have a harder time outrunning MLB catcher throws than those in AAA. And, much like his doughelganger ciabatta, the rest of his stats may be tough to swallow. (BTW, does he realize that the B in SB stands for base, not baby? Similar misconception for Kris Benson when he found out that SO stands for strikeouts and not slutty outfits.) Tabata went 2-for-4 with a steal, leaving with a leg cramp. He’ll be fine. I’d grab him in all but the shallowest leagues for steals. You could get some power. What’s the worst that happens? He goes 0-for-35 and steals your baby? Big whoop! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Brad Lincoln – 6 IP, 5 ER, 9 baserunners, 3 Ks. The Nats were treated to another major league debut… Jose Tabata. Oh, and Lincoln. I just went over Brad Lincoln for fantasy. After watching him, he didn’t change my mind about only grabbing him in NL-Only leagues. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Virginia is renaming a city for Stephen Strasburg. An old Yankee reliever is renaming himself Myke Stanton so he shows up again in Google. It’s a brand new day, Sting. You stink POO-holes, however you spell your name. Hanley, don’t wanna run out a pop-up? Have a good life! Change came, nephew. The mollywhopping, pony stick carrying, Mike Stanton is in town. No homers though. Sad trombone. 3-for-5 and a rope to right in his fourth at-bat. He looked fast down the line and absolutely gigantic. Like Frank Thomas big. Maybe it was the 3-D glasses I was wearing. Rudy and I were speaking about Stanton. We agreed. He could hit 15-20 homers and .280. Or he could hit .220. It’s rookie nookie, you gotta decide if it’s worth the blisters. Now for Big Baby Jesus, Stephen Strasburg. He had his last tune up tonight against minor league hitters… Oh, wait, that was the Pirates. My bad. Strasburg was introduced, “Last name: Ever. First name: Greatest.” For a nifty trick, in the 2nd inning he threw a 98 MPH fastball and also caught it. He looked flat-out dominating at times. Towards the end of the game, he really started heating up — maybe he put his arm in the microwave for 15 seconds on both sides — and he looked unhittable. He did after all strikeout 14 hitters. And he homered three times. Once off himself. At other times, he looked like a rookie making mistakes. I mean, he did give up a homer to Delwyn “I Don’t Even Know How To Spell My First Name” Young. I think there’s going to be a bunch of 6 inning, 2-3 earned run, 8-10 K games and some wins. Fantastic, for sure. He could win the Rookie of the Year over Heyward. But you didn’t just back into owning 1999 Pedro. Not yet at least. Maybe next year. Yesterday, one of our three girl readers got Sabathia, Dunn and Ervin for Strasburg. That’s tremendous value for Big Baby Jesus. I’d explore how hyped he is in your league too. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Cameron Maybin – Will sit in favor of Stanton. That’s so Maybin! Oh, wait. No, it’s not. In NL-Only keeper leagues, I would hold onto Maybin. Elsewhere… Well, if you worried your team can’t continue without Maybin, you have bigger fish to fry. Marlin pun! Kinda! Please, blog, may I have some more?
Dan Haren got the win yesterday, but his line was 5 2/3 IP, 3 ER, 11 baserunners and 5 Ks. Did he see his shadow in Spring Training and now think spring w0n’t start until August? Someone inform this young brother it’s the pre-All-Star Break. Ergo, therefore, vise a vie, he’s supposed to be pitching well now. He only has about a month before he turns into summer squash. Right? Well, what if he pitches well in the 2nd half this year? I know, it’s crazy talk from a guy that pees into milk bottles. So far this year, he has his best K-rate of his career. He has the 8th best K-rate in the major leagues. He also has the 2nd best K/BB in all of baseball. Just behind Roy Halladay. At his current rate, Haren would have his worst ERA since his first half year. That shizz doesn’t add up. Striking out people, not walking people and a terrible ERA? I know the 2nd half Boogie Monster scares Haren pretty good, but I think he might be able to fight the 2nd half terrors this year if his luck just evens out a little bit. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Dana Eveland – 5 IP, 3 ER, 8 baserunners, 0 Ks. Has a K:BB ratio of 21:29, which looks like a Roland Emmerich film. Both are terrible, by the way. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Javier Vazquez touched you in your no-no area for two months to the point where just looking at his name made you crawl up into a ball and cry, but yesterday he flirted with a no-no for seven innings. He held the 1927 Blue Jays to only one hit, a home run by HGH Wells. (In a strange twist, Bautista didn’t homer, but he did have sex with your wife. Don’t shoot the messenger!) So can Javier Vazquez now be trusted? The better question is did anyone really think he was the 8 ERA pitcher he was showing in April and May? Come on, this is baseball. It’s a sport of aberrations from day-to-day and week-to-week and month-to-month, but, in the end, people find their level. Vazquez is more or less a 4.50 ERA pitcher in the AL. So you need some months of dreckitude surrounded by some months of usability. Vazquez is still walking too many guys and, other than him striking out 9 Blue Kays yesterday and the Suckie-O’s the game before, his Ks have been down. So usable, but don’t expect a full return of 2009 Vazquez. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Mike Stanton – He’s coming up on Tuesday. Can you hear that? It’s my heart going pitter patter. Put your ear up to the computer monitor, you’ll hear it. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Matt Lindstrom threw 1 IP, 2 ER and his second blown save in two games and third in his last four. If you’re not reading this until Sunday, he probably blew another game. Oops, there goes another one. I grabbed Brandon Lyon in two leagues where he was available. If it was simply Lindstrom sucking, I’d say you can hold off, but Lindstrom said he has mechanical issues. You know what mechanical issues are code for, right? A breakdown. In the mean’s while, Lyon is just okay. If I said he was good, I’d be (Mad Lib in your own pun). But Lyon does have closing experience, so there’s that junebug on the duck’s back or some other yokelism. As for Matt Capps, his rope is a bit longer, but his shakes haven’t been great either. Yesterday, he went 2/3 IP, 3 unearned runs and the third time he was Cappsized this year. Ticker shock due to Cristian Guzman playing about fifty feet too far behind 2nd. It was Guzman’s third error of the game. [mind-boggling] I realize the Nats are the Nots without Guzman and all, but there really should’ve been a defensive replacement in this game. Please, blog, may I have some more?
In a year where umpires like Joe West and Bill Hohn are doing all they can to show they are far from perfect, Jim Joyce went one step further by having his imperfection blow someone else’s perfection. It’s like that O. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Dontrelle Willis, the flat-billed pitchypus in question, was traded to the Diamondbacks for a half-used #2 pencil and a race car-shaped eraser. When a team trades a guy and still has to pay the majority of his salary, it’s usually not a good sign. I have maintained in the past that maybe the only thing eating at Dontrelle was the Tigers taking away the best aspect of his game –> his hitting. It’s still not a reason to pick him up. It’s not like the Diamondbacks stadium is a pitchers’ haven. Let someone else take the flat-billed pitchypus under their wing and nurture it back to health. Anyway, here’s what else we saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Mark Teixeira – Day-to-day after he left the game with a bruised foot, which is far less tasty than a braised foot. Please, blog, may I have some more?
On short rest, Randy Wells went five innings, 0 ER, 6 baserunners, 3 Ks. Oh, and I’m drunk. Don’t know what that has to do with anything, but I thought you should know for the following. I love Randy Wells! There, I said it. He’s striking out hitters and keeping walks to a minimum. His FIP is saying he’s been unlucky, even if he was outpitched by Ohlendorf. Will the person with the license plate “O Da Dorf,” please move their car? Hmm… Maybe I should sleep off my buzz before doing the roundup? Nah…If Hemingway can write The Sun Also Rises drunk, I can write a roundup. The EL Camino with the license plate “O Da Dorf” is parked on the front lawn with its engine running. We’re gonna have to ask you to move that… Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Andrew Cashner – The Cubs called him up. Stephen literally just went over him in a Scouting the Unknown. You heard stick and move. Try click and skim. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Kendry Morales could miss the rest of the season after breaking his leg during the celebration of his walk-off grand slam. Too bad the Wide World of Sports isn’t still on. They could’ve covered the agony and the ecstasy all in one full swoop. This injury reminds me of the time Justin Duchscherer heard The Hokey Pokey and in celebration put his right hip out. And didn’t put his right hip back in for six to eight months later. In place of Kendry, the Angels could call up Mark Trumbo. In AL-Only leagues, he’s worth grabbing for his power potential. In 47 games, he has 11 homers, but it’s also in the PCL, so there’s your grain of salt. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:
Howie Kendrick – 2-for-5, 4 RBIs and two home runs. Second home run was a game winner but there was no need for pylons around yesterday’s pile-on. The celebration was kept in check by Scioscia. He said under no circumstances is anyone supposed to injury another teammate in a celebration unless that player is Mike Napoli. Please, blog, may I have some more?
Scott Rolen went 2-for-4 as he hit his 3rd homer in the last week. Now has 11 homers and 30 RBIs. I’d say he’s in this afternoon’s Buy/Sell, but he’s not. He almost was then I thought about what I would write about him. I didn’t want to write about how I wasn’t sure what to write about him. I figured that was pointless. Wait… Oh. Soooo, Rolen will hit 25 homers this year with a decent average and RBIs or he’ll get hurt and play only 100 games. I’m thinking the latter happens, but I’d own him if I needed power for a chance at the former. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Johnny Cueto – 6 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners, 9 Ks. Please, blog, may I have some more?