Comatose Pirates Fan, I have a surprise for you.  You may want to sit down.  No, no.  It’s a good surprise.  The salad days of Willie Stargell are back!  (Though even Pops would’ve agreed salad wasn’t on his menu.)  I’m excited for the Pirates, they’ve been the Andy Dufresne of major league baseball for far too long.   Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

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Sometimes there’s a game with so much fantasy goodness, a game with so many notable nights for so many fantasy-relevant stars, that it’s almost overwhelming to choose which players to single out. Last night, the Braves came back from 9 runs down to complete their biggest comeback since 1987 and pull within 2 1/2 of the first place Nats, winning the game 11-10. Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

First Stanton, now Joey Votto.  I got two good knees.  Take my knees.  Please!  I take my knees everywhere and they always find their way home.  I will attempt to put into words how distraught I was over losing Votto, but Autocorrect tried to change put into pout, so even it knows this isn’t going to be easy.   Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?

Four full days without fantasy baseball!? I know, it was brutal. How are we possibly supposed to keep ourselves occupied when we’re not refreshing our team pages every two minutes? In all seriouslyness, there are plenty of alternatives to constantly monitoring your team, for example: speak to a loved one, watch the All-Star Game (yaaaawn), go outside, play real baseball (have a catch with the old man?), Google cat videos, or if you dare not venture too far out of your comfort zone, perhaps you can start to prepare for your fantasy football draft? Please, blog, may I have some more?

Please, blog, may I have some more?