Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes

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MmmFlop

| Fantasy Baseball Daily Notes | 126 Comments

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Tommy Hanson‘s line yesterday was one and two-thirds innings and eight earned runs.  Yes, you’ve been Pwnson’d.  Hanson said he felt dizzy during the game, I’m sure his owners can sympathize.  Hanson has an ERA of 4.18 on the year and back to back bad starts.  Try and put a pine tree air freshener on that and it still stinks.  Going into this year, I steered clear of Hanson.  I was legitimately worried about his innings pitched jump from ’08 to ’09.  So sell fast right now?  Not so fast, Paulo.  I’m going under the assumption that you don’t own him because you listened to me in the preseason.  Hanson has a tremendous K-rate and his walks have been fine.  Even yesterday it was an ill-timed homer to Votto that did him in.  Do I think Hanson could still be a risk because of his innings last year?  Yup, you betcha.  But I’d buy him for 50 cents on the dollar.  It depends how cheap you can swindle his dramatized owner.  It takes alligator blood to check raise to the bed wetter.  Anyway, here’s what else saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Brooks Conrad – If you didn’t see the end of the Braves game, you should try to catch the Brooks Conrad homer.  Unlike Nix.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

And They’re Going To Disgraceland

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The Disgraceful List claimed two more yesterday, Josh Beckett and Grady Sizemore.  Neither is a big surprise.  Closest Grady Sizemore came to taking off this year was in his amateur Playgirl shoot.  Even when he hit a home run, the rain washed it away.  The Indians are talking about knee surgery for Grady.  Turns out Tom Sizemore isn’t the only Sizemore with a joint problem.  I’d DL Sizemore until more news surfaces, but, if recent history is any indication, new news (stutter much?) will be bad news.  As for Josh Beckett, I’m more optimistic.  He can miss a few weeks, put this back injury behind him (literally!) and return.  Will he be effective on his return?  What, I’m Nostradumbass?  I don’t know, but it’s possible he has a decent half season.  I wouldn’t trade for him, but I would pick him up off waivers and stash him.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Psyche!  Before I jump into the roundup, quick bit of business.  No one likes to have to ask for shizz, but this voting thing at the Refresh Challenge is for a good cause.  To up the stakes, we’re donating a $100 gift card to Wal-Mart.  All you have to do is vote and comment “Razzball” over at the voting site.  The comment names will be chosen at random on Monday and the winner will be announced here.  That link again is http://pep.si/abEtbm — Wow, I feel like George Clooney.  Anyway II, here’s the roundup:

Trevor Hoffman – Probably should be headed to the Disgraceful List but in the meantime the Brewers say he won’t pitch for a few days while he works on his mechanics.  Carlos Villanueva and Todd Coffey are the pickups, in that order.  Or the reverse order if you’re dyslexic.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Marlins Have A Few Lazybones To Pick

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Hanley Ramirez said he wasn’t lollygagging after the ball.  I see his point.  You can’t chase after the ball.  You kick the ball to the curb, neg it then hope the ball comes back to you.  That’s Pickup Artist Rules 101.  Hanley was benched yesterday and now there’s talk he may get traded.  Fredi said, “We don’t want the game played like that in front of our fans.”  Insert your “There are no Marlin fans” joke here.  I don’t think he’s traded away.  In fact, I think all this shizz blows over in a day or so.  What are the Marlins going to do?  Trade away their best player?  As someone in the audience of Jerry Springer might say, “Pay first month on that puh-lease.”  Fredi Gonzalez will be out of job before Hanley gets traded.  Hanley being Manny and the Marlins will learn to deal with it.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Cameron Maybin – Hit his 2nd homer of the year.  That’s so Maybin!

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Arizona Going Nutsy, Checking Rivera’s Paperwork

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Saul Rivera, who is surprisingly not related to Eli Whiteside, was acquired by the Diamondbacks.  Big shakes, huh?  Yeah, Rivera could get into the mix for saves.  Another potential candidate for saves is… Wait for it… Here it comes… It’s here somewhere… Where are my notes… Oh, here they are… That’s my freakin’ shopping list, and I didn’t even spell minestrone right… Oh, here… Aaron Heilman!  Not sure how the D-Backs are going to have a bullpen of Saul and Heilman.  Sounds like the outtakes for Schlinder’s List.  Saul walks 3 batters and turns the game over to Heilman.  Heilman enters and says, “I pardon you, Saul.”  Heilman will probably get exploited for being, well, not so good and having small fingers, but Qualls is close to getting removed from the closer role.  Right now, Heilman’s the setup man and he gave up a run yesterday.  The Diamondbacks also dropped Bob Howry.  Why?  Because.  Oh, and there’s Juan Gutierrez.  That’s not a closerousel, THIS IS A CLOSEROUSEL!  I’d own Qualls and Heilman.  Gutierrez and I, we’re like Kramer vs.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Hey Ya! Andre’s Out, Cast?

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No, there’s probably no cast in Andre’s future.  I’m not even sure they make casts small enough for the pinkie finger.  That was Pingping‘s downfall, that and the chain smoking.  After Andre Ethier broke a bone in his pinkie, he said something was seriously wrong.  Seriously?  You got a boo-boo on your pinkie!  What, you can’t make shadow animals now?  When he found out what it was, he said that it’s the leverage point of his swing and it would prevent him from holding the bat the way he normally does.  Who’s leverage point is their freakin’ pinkie?!  This is like the pea under the princess’s mattress.  His biggest concern is probably how he can stick his pinkie out while drinking tea.  Ethier could be out for a few weeks or he can play through it.  So he’s damned if he does or a half dozen of the other… Or however that cliché goes.  If it is his leverage point, you don’t want him playing through it.  If he doesn’t play through it, he could be out at least a few weeks.  And here I thought the only time Ethier and the word pinkie would be associated would be from this picture.  Draw your own conclusions, but I’m guessing he’s in Key West.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Chad Billingsley – 7 1/3 IP, 0 ER, 5 baserunners, 6 Ks.  What every pitcher needs, a trip to Petco.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Javy Nagila

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Javier Vazquez went seven innings, giving up 2 ER with 7 baserunners and recording 7 Ks as he lowered his ERA to 8.10.  Though, he could’ve gave up 6 runs in 7 innings and would’ve lowered his ERA.  Do I think Javy released his inner leprechaun and found the pot on the other side of his crappy pitching?  Yes and no.  There was no way Vazquez was going to pitch a 9.78 ERA all year.  I mean, c’mon, that was obscene.  He had given up more runs than innings.  He was getting Pwnson’d every time out.  The rest of the way he should be around a 4 to 4.50 ERA guy.  There’s room to own that, but don’t expect last year this year, clear?  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Phil Hughes – 7 IP, 0 ER, 6 baserunners, 8 Ks and now has a 1.38 ERA on the year.  I really wanted to own Hughes this year.  Alas, it didn’t happen.  Alas II, I did draft Joba.  Alas III, I dropped Joba before he got any saves.  Alas IV, there’s no Alas IV.  Dur.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Show Your Huevos, It’s Holland’s Days

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Derek Holland is not officially a rookie, but that doesn’t mean he might not roofie you.  Pitching in and out of the rotation last year, he had some real ulcer-inducing starts.   I know, I have the internal scars to prove it.  Oh, Mylanta!  Though his xFIP was better than his actual ERA.  I know, too bad your league isn’t all fussy with an xFIP category.  Holland’s a plus-plus strikeout guy.  In the hitter-friendly PCL, he had a 37:7 K:BB rate and a 0.93 ERA.  He’s homer-prone and in Arlington that is a recipe for turd nuggets.  I’m much more aggressive about grabbing young hitters than young pitchers.  Hitters give you an 0-for-34 and you punt.  A pitcher gives you a 2 IP, 7 ER start and that causes you to punch a random stranger and then next thing you know some guy named Bubba is fitting you for a teardrop tattoo.  See how quickly that spiral spun downward?  Ask Lawrence Taylor, he’ll tell you.  So I didn’t grab Holland anywhere, but I would in the right circumstances, as long as you monitor where you start him.  His first two outings are set for the A’s and Angels.  That’s a “Yes, please” and “Don’t mind if I do.”  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Johnny Cueto – 9 IP, 1 hit shutout with 8 Ks as he dropped his ERA to 4.07 on the season.  And there’s why I liked him so much in the preseason.  If he’s out there in your league, own him, in the non-biblical sense.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Nap Time For Junior

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Ken Griffey Jr. missed a pinch hitting opportunity last week because he was asleep in the clubhouse.  In related news, Grady Sizemore has been sleepwalking through his at-bats.  Maybe Griffey was pooped from his Dick’s Sporting Goods commercial.  If the end is indeed nigh for Griffey, and if nigh is the right archaic word, this could mean an extended leash for Michael Saunders.  He’s a low teen power/speed guy without much average, so the M’s would be going from yawning to yawnstipating.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:

Brad Lidge – Stiffness in his elbow.  In Italian guy straight from Ellis Island terms, that’s notta so good.  The Phils held Contreras to pitch the ninth for the save.  Save vultures, commence vulturing.

Please, blog, may I have some more?
Grey

Braden Breaks Unhitten Rule

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Dallas Braden threw a perfect game yesterday as every single Rays hitter chickened out and didn’t step on the mound.  If you know something gets in a guy’s head, don’t you exploit that?  I say you send a pinch hitter, say, Pat Burrell out there JUST to step on the mound.  So Braden’s still not someone I’d be excited to own in mixed leagues.  His K-rate is poor, though he has, obviously, found some success with his changeup.  In his game after his perfect game, Buehrle gave up 5 earned in 6 1/3 innings.  So perfect is nice, but it means little.  If you happen to own Braden, I’d see what he could get in a trade.  Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:

Tim Stauffer – 5 IP, 0 ER, 6 baserunners, 1 K.  Stauffer filled in for Correia, who missed the start with a family emergency.  I’ve owned Stauffer in one NL-Only league for the last couple of weeks, hoping that he would work his way into the rotation.  This probably isn’t that opening, but at some point it’ll come for Stauffer.  Either way, he’s been great in middle relief, sporting a 0.39 ERA and 0.94 WHIP, with just over 8 Ks per 9.  Worth owning for MR ratio help.

Please, blog, may I have some more?