Brandon Belt was recalled yesterday in the wake of Buster Posey’s broken fibula — no lie! So far this year, Belt was hitting a cool (shouldn’t it be hot?) .351 with 4 homers and 3 steals in thirty games…If you ignore what he did in the major leagues. Why did he fail in his first go around? Was it bad luck? P to the erhaps. Was it just a small sample size? That’s what she said! Was it the pressure of the call up? Well, filling in for Buster Posey shouldn’t be any pressure. I think it was a combination of all of these things. Bad luck triggers the hitter to press while hanging over them is the fear of a demotion. It’s damaging to the psyche, I tell ya. Don’t worry, I won’t bill you by the hour for this. (I’m really just reading off my Freud day-to-day desk calendar anyway.) In all leagues, grab Belt like Mr.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Last night, Buster Posey was carried off the field after Scott Cousins plowed him over. This was the worst bang-bang play a catcher took in San Francisco since– Okay, you almost drew me into that one, but I’m not going there. It didn’t look good as Posey wasn’t able to put weight on his leg. Everyone’s favorite lox dealer, Eli Whiteside, would take over if the busted Posey misses time. As Eli would say, oy. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Mike Minor – 5 2/3 IP, 1 ER, 9 baserunners, 5 Ks. The reason why I haven’t been screaming for you to grab this Minor, besides the fact I’m not Gary Glitter or Jeffrey Jones, is I have no idea the Braves plan for him. I imagine he’s sent back down as soon as Beachy returns. You can pick up Minor, just in case he sticks. I do still have much love for him. Even if he hasn’t returned any of my phone calls, appreciated my unannounced drop-bys or patted my butt when I’ve asked him to.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Jorge de la Rosa left the third inning because of elbow soreness. I thought it sounded ominous at the time, but I also thought it might’ve been the older, Hispanic lady riding her bicycle passed my window chanting, “Flores para los muertos.” It turned out it was a combination of both. Jorge’s gonna be sleeping with the pisces for a while as he heads off to get Tommy John surgery. Elsewhere, Rubby de la Rosa was promoted by the Dodgers. Up and down day for the de la Rosas, apparently. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Carlos Gonzalez – Had a big day in the doubleheader at Coors. Multiple home runs, RBIs and runs. A ménage à trois of fantasy goodness.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Corey Hart with 3 homers, 7 RBIs and a pair of sunglasses. Never surrender, Corey Hart! In short, you should grab him if he’s on waivers (80% owned in Yahoo). In shorter, grab him. In shortest, grab. He’s streaky like Bret Boone’s hair in the 90′s and this is obviously the start of a good one. If he’s not on waivers and someone else owns him, you bid him adieu, assuming you’re French. (I know how much the French are into fantasy baseball.) Just as I felt in the beginning of the year, I don’t think Hart comes anywhere near his 2010 stats. Très bummer! Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Stephen Strasburg – Threw off the mound for the first time. His fan club, the House of Strasburg, has time to launder their early-1900s, Austrian officer uniforms as their ordainment of St.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Vicente Padilla went to the DL with a forearm strain. Maybe it’s was straining to be a fivearm. Oofa! Who am I, Buddy Hackett? Actually, I am. No, I kid. Or do I?! No, I do, he’s dead. Unless I’m writing this post from beyond the grave! Boo! Know what I like most about Matt Guerrier? He’s not Padilla. How’s dem apples? Sour! Then we have Kenley Jansen– “Buh-buh-but, Grey! Who do we own from the Dodgers bullpen? I can’t own everyone. By the way, nice mustache. Primo!” For immediate closer action, I’d own Guerrier, Jansen, Alyssa Milano, in that order. Unless your league counts blown saves, then reverse the order. But — and unless you’re an alien, there’s always a but — I think Jansen ends the season with more saves than Guerrier. The only problem is I think he gets weaned into the job and may not be getting saves regularly at first. Frankly, it’s a committee and too many chefs make too many hors d’oeuvres and not enough entrees, or whatever that cliche is. Oh, and because any great closerousel shituation should keep fantasy owners on their toes, Guerrier pitched the 8th inning in a losing game last night. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Joe Blanton – Yesterday, he was scratched. No word if he’s still itchy.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Danny Duffy is much better than Stan Stuffy. Or Brian Bruffy. Now Gerry Guffy, well, he’s another story. Stephen literally just went over his Danny Duffy fantasy. He wrote it in pink highlighter while having cornrows put in his hair. Oh, Stephen. So what can we expect of The Duffman? Maybe just a spot start. Though when the Royals announced it was only a spot start they did wink, wink, nudge, nudge the Royals beat reporter. His stuff/numbers have been dynamite this year. The Royals should just keep him in the rotation. I mean, who are they rushing to get back to in this rotation? Jeff Francis? Vin Mazzaro? Nadir Bupkis? No, blech and belch. I’d grab Duffy in AL-Only and very deep mixed leagues then wait to see if he stays in the rotation. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Matt Guerrier – Just when you thought you had the Dodgers bullpen figured out, Don Mattingly bats his long, beautiful eyelashes and brings Guerrier on for the save. How many closers do the Dodgers have now? I don’t know, but more the Guerrier! What’s that circling above Dodgers Stadium? Oh my God, it’s save vultures! Don’t you dare peck at Vin Scully! He’s a national treasure! I think everyone knows how I feel about Padilla. I think he’s crizz to the ap. He’s not an effective closer. Guerrier, actually, can be. That still means to get Guerrier to five saves on the year in the City of Angels he needs a wing and a prayer. (Pun point!) But I would grab Guerrier if I had room and really needed saves.Please, blog, may I have some more?
David Wright has a stress fracture in his lower back. It’s the new Mets, same as the old Mess! I find it hard to believe this is still The Curse of the Shirtless Bernazard, but who else is evil eyeing them? George Foster? (BTW, If George Foster ever evil eyed you for longer than 5 seconds, you’d turn to stone. Fact!) The Mets are downplaying Wright’s injury, but what else is new with the Mets? Let’s look at their truthiness in some recent reports: In 2009, “Reyes will be out for a few days.” In reality, he’s only fully recovered two years later. In 2009, “Beltran will be out for three to five days.” In reality, he missed two seasons. “K-Rod and his stepfather, an up and coming videographer, were remaking the “Beat It” video.” In reality, K-Rod blew Kabuki white powder into his stepfather’s face and hit him over the head with a metal chair. So the Mets are saying Wright might miss only a week and a half to two weeks. Um, okay. Even if he returns quickly, a stress fracture in his lower back isn’t going to hurt his power? Yeah, that’s rhetorical. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Jose Reyes – 2-for-5, 2 steals. Now has 16 steals on the year. How do you motivate overpaid athletes? With the allure of being vastly overpaid.Please, blog, may I have some more?
A whale of a prospect plus a bad oblique leads to a a closed Beachy. Enter Julio Teheran. Well, reenter Julio Teheran. Teheranasaurus Rex! First, let’s see what Stephen said about him, “Easily the best story of the 2010 minor league year. Teheran throws a 92 to 96 MPH fastball, an above-average changeup, and a more consistent breaking pitch. Teheran is considered a top 5 pitching prospect in the minors, if not top three. Finally, I hope Grey gets his mustache caught in the gears of a car.” Hmm… Maybe I should’ve read what he wrote before quoting him. Anyhoo! Don’t judge Teheran on his messy first start in the bigs. He should be grabbed in most competitive leagues. Should have a 7+ K/9 and a high 3 ERA with a chance for a lot more. Anyway, here’s what else I saw this weekend in fantasy baseball:
Chris Carpenter – 6 1/3 IP, 7 ER, 11 baserunners, 5 Ks as he was handily beat by Wood (6 IP, 2 ER, 8 baserunners, 3 Ks). In honor of the Carpenter/Wood matchup, everyone in attendance received a bill for $5000 for a picket fence that wasn’t completed correctly.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Carlos Beltran, or as I like to call him Rickie from My So Called Life because of his resemblance, went 3-for-5 with 6 RBIs and 3 homers yesterday. 2006 called they want Beltran back. I’d put Beltran in the same boat as Sizemore. In fact, I did yesterday. He’s not going to steal bases anymore. Those days appear closer in the rearview mirror than they actually are. Beltran hasn’t even attempted a steal this year. Watching him play and you realize Ron Kovic could give him a run for his money. So if someone in your league thinks, Beltran is back to the 30/20 player he once was I’d check raise to the bettor and see what they have to offer. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Justin Masterson – 5 2/3 IP, 5 ER, 12 baserunners, 6 Ks. A pimply teenager runs into frame and screams, “Watch out! Justin Masterson is falling back to earth!” Then Roland Emmerich calls cut, but it’s too late.Please, blog, may I have some more?
Kendrys Morales is out for another 6 months with surgery to remove scar tissue. Who was the first surgeon to operate on him? Dr. Nick Riviera? Hey, boys and three girls! Bummer for the Los Angeles Angels of Not Los Angeles County…I mean, hello, Trumbo. Giddy up, snitches! The Sciosciapath has to play Trumbo now, right? I mean, probably. Can’t put anything over on that sly fox. And by ‘sly,’ I mean dumb. And by ‘fox,’ I mean not a fox. If you’re hurting for a corner man, this should be all the incentive you need to sound the Trumbo. Anyway, here’s what else I saw yesterday in fantasy baseball:
Grady Sizemore – It’s the return of Wounded Knee. Sizemore went for an MRI for his knee pain. In other news, water is wet, taco diarrhea burns and astronaut ice cream is delicious. If you own Sizemore, consider therapy to find out why you keep trying to hurt yourself with your life choices. “Why’s everyone in my living room? I was just going to move Sizemore to my bench.” “Billy, have you thought about trading Sizemore for a pitcher?” “No! He makes me feel special! I hate all of you!” “Why can’t you just do crank like your brother?!” That’s you on the show Intervention when your family confronts you about your fantasy draft choices. Now Sizemore’s MRI says (yes, the MRI talks) his knee is fine. Right. So let him play a few days, then you trade him. He’s not going to run this year, so what do you have with Grady? You have Beltran, Jason Kubel or a host of other some power, no speed outfielders. You don’t have the 30/30 Sizemore of yesteryear (2008).Please, blog, may I have some more?